This is my first Camp Rock story and it's inspired by the Demi Lovato song "In Case". I'm going to let my story talk for itself. It came from the heart so I hope you enjoy.
((Shane and Mitchie are both thirty-six.))
Disclaimer: I don't own Camp Rock or its characters.
"I remember that it hurt, looking at her hurt. The way she held herself around other people after her life turned to shit, it was almost like nothing was wrong but the look in her eyes was chilling. Vacant and unseeing, it was like she had lost something vital. And she had... we both had."
-..-..-
(June 14, 2021)
It's late at night when she wakes up, the mattress beneath her soaked and pain stabbing her deep in the abdomen. She breaths heavy for a moment, disoriented, then fumbles for the light.
When it shines bright the man beside her groans in distaste.
"Shane." her voice is steady, yet the tone in which she speaks causes him to wake up immediately.
He becomes more aware of his surroundings- his wife cries, her steady facade failing as sobs come from deep within her chest. Her blood is smeared on the sheets, a sight all too familiar to him. He slides out from under the covers, moving to her side and without a word pulls her into his arms.
His jaw muscles bunch then relax as he clenches his teeth... this shouldn't be happening again.
Shane doesn't try to make excuses because it does no good to say it's going to be okay when it's not. And when her cries subside he says quietly, "Let's go to the hospital." Because that's all they can do. Nothing can make this right.
He picks her up, leaving the blood stained mess behind him.
It isn't until later, when Mitchie is safe and relatively calm in a hospital bed, that he steps out of the room and weeps.
"She would cry at night when she thought I couldn't hear her. More often than not I'd feign sleep, knowing that she had to grieve in her own way. I'm not proud of what I did, or rather didn't do, and I suppose that's part of the reason we started to drift apart. I missed the way her brown eyes that used to sparkle at me, and the way her laugh would echo in our house."
-..-..-
(July 26, 2021)
It has become an unspoken agreement between the two of them; he makes dinner every night and keeps their music room clean while she does laundry and cleans the bathrooms. They are monotonous tasks but both are thankful that it keeps them focused on the future and not the past.
Shane isn't that skilled in the kitchen- he never has been- but he's mastered the art of making box mac & cheese and putting frozen mixed vegetables in the microwave. It is soon after one such dinner that he hears a strangled cry come from Mitchie. At the sound Shane stops what he's doing and tears begin to sting his eyes.
He finds her in the laundry room, the fluorescent lights washing out Mitchie' tan skin. She rocks back and forth, mumbling- a pair of skinny jeans and two faded grey squares of photo paper beside her. He doesn't question her and slides down the wall beside his wife to hold her for the first time since the miscarriage.
They cry together, Shane squeezing Mitchie tightly while murmuring nonsense in her ear. Her breathing soon slows and her crying is reduced to hiccups.
"I've got you Mitchie... I won't let you go."
"Thank you," she says softly after a while. "... for being so good to me."
She falls asleep in his arms soon after that and Shane carries her to their bed. He rubs his face tiredly after closing the door behind himself and makes his way back to the laundry room. Just as he's about to turn off the light his eye is caught once again by the grey photo paper squares. Curious he picks them up and his heart lurches uncomfortably in his chest.
They are the pictures he kept in his pocket to remind himself of better times.
On top is a faded sonogram picture- Mitchie' name in the upper left corner and the indistinct black and white blurb of their unborn child are barely visible. It brings tears to his eyes and he runs his thumb over the damp paper. The second one is of him and Mitchie under the Camp Rock sign. Nate, Shane's brother, had taken it as Mitchie laughed at the camera and Shane is grinning at her in return.
He remembers that summer well. Despite their professions- a music teacher and English teacher respectively- they spent the summer being camp instructors; Shane for a hip-hop dance and Mitchie for advanced singing.
It's a long time before he comes back to himself and because he's emotionally drained, he turns off all the lights in the house and goes to bed.
When it was raining used to be my favorite kind of weather. The way it would smell right before a downpour was invigorating and made me feel like I was invincible and then when it stopped it was like everything was right in the world. Clean and pure, ready for anything. Then our fight happened and everything changed.
..-..-..
(August 10, 2021)
It is dark outside and rain pours from the clouds as lightning flashes through the sky, thunder rumbling ominously.
Mitchie runs fast, her feet pounding the pavement. Shane follows closely, his black curls becoming plastered to his head.
"Would you just stop?" Shane yells over the weather. "Come back to the house Mitchie...please?"
She stops abruptly at his words and Shane almost knocks her over. She turns just as lighting illuminates her face.
"Why do we keep doing this, Shane?" Mitchie's voice cracks and pitches over the sound of the rain. She is trembling and soaked to the bone but the way she looks at him is unwavering.
He sags as if her words weighed him down. "I'm sorry." he repeats, not answering her question.
For a few moments there is only the sound of thunder between them.
"Nothing is going to change Shane" she finally says plaintively, her tears mingling with the rain "... not this way. The way we're living now is toxic. We barely held on to one another the last time this happened and I'm afraid that we won't this time. I love you Shane... god, I love you so much, but is that enough?"
His breath hitches as he thinks about the implication of her words. She is waiting for his answer.
Shane holds her gaze, moving closer to her.
"Don't you think so?" he asks finally, his dark eyes tracing Mitchie's face.
"I used to." she says quietly, covering her quivering mouth with a shaking hand. The words are out in the open and they can't be taken back.
All the anger between them is gone and is replaced with hurt.
His breath catches in his throat again and when he speaks his words are choked. "But you don't anymore?"
Mitchie seems to contemplate his answer for a moment.
"I know I need more than what you've been giving me and that you need more than what I've been giving you. We have been tip-toeing around each other since..." she stops, her voice trailing off. She takes a deep breath. "We don't talk anymore aside from the rare 'How was your day?' over dinner. You don't touch me... and it's like you're afraid I'm going to break. I'm stronger than I was before and Shane, I need the man I fell in love with back. It happened... I had a miscarriage, but our lives together can't stop because of it."
Shane huffs out a breath, his anger coming back.
"You're such a hypocrite Mitchie. You say that I need to get over our child dying but I've heard you at night, crying your eyes out. You sit in the barely started nursery and sing nursery rhymes to nobody. I try and talk to you and you bite my head off, but somehow that escapes you every time you start this argument. So- don't you dare give me shit for grieving because I cared about our child too!" He slaps his chest with his hand.
Shane's words pierce Mitchie's heart and she tightens her jaw, grinding her teeth. She knows he's right but she pushes it back and says what she thinks will hurt him the most.
"We've got a big house and an empty marriage. We don't have children and there is no hope that things will ever change. And I can't take it anymore."
The words come out as a hiss and he visibly sags under the weight of her words and although his eyes are wounded Mitchie stares at him coldly.
"Empty marriage? Is that really how you feel?"
"Yes."
It was the meanest thing she's ever said to anyone and she wishes she could take it back. Calling her marriage empty was a punch to the gut, brought on by anger and hurt, with the intent to kill.
The tension is palpable and the rain comes down harder.
"You want to see an empty marriage? I'll give you an empty marriage! I'll give you a big empty house and a big empty life to match it!"
Shane storms into the house and she follows, just as he did with her.
"Shane..."
He whirls to face her, anger blazing in his eyes, replacing the hurt from only moments before. For the first time Mitchie is truly scared by Shane.
"Mitchie- I swear- if you say one more word divorce papers will hit you in the face so hard it will make your head spin."
She cringes as a knee jerk reaction then goes after Shane, who has stormed off to their room and is wedging on his sneakers.
"Don't you dare threaten me Shane Grey! I'm a grown woman and your wife, so unless you are gonna put your money where your mouth is, don't you dare say that to me! This is my life too!"
He says nothing in response but grabs a duffel bag from their closet, shoving clothes from his side of the closet in it, and stomping to the dresser to do the same thing. The same rain they stood in moments ago patters on the roof in the silence.
"If you could go back..." she stops. "If you could go back, would you have ever been with me Shane? Would you go through all this pain again for our eight years of happiness?"
He still doesn't respond so Mitchie continues to talk.
"We were supposed to have children. I want children. I want them, with you, now – and we can't because we keep losing them." She deflates, her shoulders dropping low. "I wanted to be a younger mother than this. I wanted you to be a younger father so we could run and play with our child together." Her voice breaks over the next words, "I'm sorry we can't have the child we promised each other eight years ago."
"Yeah," he says finally. "I am too."
And he brushes past her, leaving an echoing silence in his wake.
Part 2 coming soon... stay tuned.