Impossibly Awkward Romance
She was stuck in the midst of her mind. Why did the sky seem like it was beckoning her to do something?
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That was when the gears in her head malfunctioned.
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Him and her,
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were still caught in a blurr.
"Cool!" a student shouted, pointing outside the window. Everyone followed the direction of the hand, impressed with whatever fascinated their vision.
She looked out the window, expecting to see the dark clouds shrouding the sunshine once again, but was taken aback when a cool blue sky greeted her. She tilted her head, squinting at what seemed a peculiar cloud in the form of an awkward turtle. The sunrays rested upon her porcelain face, warming her cheeks. As she raised a hand to cover her eyes from the beaming sun, her stomach twisted into a knot, a feeling of nostalgia shook deep inside of her. The awkward turtle seemed to be mocking herself, her very existence. Her other hand was clenched, the familiar face of a boy flashed in her mind vividly. Suddenly, sounds of a busy city replayed in her mind, the flashback crawling back inside her shell.
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They were known as the awkward couple. The thought of pairing these two had never crossed their minds; it was beyond the act of impossibility, beyond the stars in the universe. Yet, funny things could happen in this crazy unpredictable world, but then again, love had its ways of twisting the most unlikely of fates together to accomplish the quote: 'expect the unexpected'. Funny, they never considered the awkward couple as a factor of that quote.
She walked onto the grass, leaning idly against the tall gum tree with the leaves swaying in the light breeze. The crunch of wet grass snapped her out of her reverie as she focused her sight on her boyfriend. "Hey…" she said awkwardly.
The boy twitched as he attempted flashing a tiny smile at her, eventually failing. "Hi…" he greeted back just as gawkily. "Sorry I called you here, I just needed to talk to someone, and you were the first person who came to mind," he admitted, tears forming in his eyes.
"Okay, then. What's up?" she asked, shrugging. She tried to avoid his piercing blue eyes that darkened from the way she avoided him.
"My… my grandfather," he took in a deep breath, "passed away yesterday." His hands clenched, his lips trembling as tears slid down his flushed cheeks. Sobs erupted from him as he crouched onto the ground, pulling at the green dewy grass. The sunrays illuminated his tears as they dropped onto the wet grass. The gears in her head stopped turning clockwise, her breathing hitched. No, she wasn't feeling like this because of his tragic loss, but of the dreaded outcomes. To put it simple, she was that awkward turtle that soared freely in the sky. She was not only infamous for her blackmailing hobbies, but of her consistently avoiding anything categorised under the word 'emotion'. She avoided emotional confrontations yet the one who understood her the most, threw it at her, and she honestly had no idea how to uphold the situation from slipping out of her hand. She knew that after this day, the gears in her mind would start spinning anti-clock wise.
"Are you alright?" she blurted out, keeping her expressionless façade intact. Those three words was the key to the doom of their impossibly awkward romance. Funny, how the words 'I love you' was the key to the bloom of their impossibly awkward romance.
His jaw tightened, his eyes snake-like. "You honestly want me to answer that? I'm sure you could do better at understanding me, Imai," he spat out harshly. "Obviously I'm not alright. My grandfather was always beside me, helping me in life. He never once isolated me, he always understood me in the worst possible situations, and being the stupid person I was, took his grace for granted. I expected you to understand me the most, see through my intentions, and be there for me," he murmured, frustration laced in his tired voice.
"I thought you'd at least be more consoling than this, Imai. I guess my standards are too high for even an achiever like you, to reach."
His words stung her deep, clawing into her heart and soul. She had known she was incapable of being the girlfriend he wanted, but being the girlfriend he needed was something not listed in her incapability. He simply needed her; nothing more, nothing less, yet she had failed. "I… I…" she tried to reassure her love, but to no avail, she could only watch him stare at her in disappointment.
He cracked his knuckles, somewhat intimidating her. "Is that all you've got to say after my speech? Has not a single thing touched your ice cubed heart?"
For once, she was afraid. She slowly said, "Why are you acting like this? You would be optimistic, never one to insult me." It sounded stupid coming out of her mouth, but it did not deny the situation.
Once again, his lips tugged up in a smirk. He chuckled, "Surprised? Well, I guess I'd let you do more of showing me how much you really love me. I guess I was wrong. All this time, it was me who was happy, always seeing the fun in life and a child at heart. I was extremely happy when we got together, so I figured your non-existent emotions were hidden deep down, therefore I was happy for you. I showed more happiness for you, because I knew you weren't the type to celebrate."
No matter how many times she opened her mouth to object, the words never came out. She was a coward, and was what he had described her as. "You're really frustrating…" was the words that came flying out of her mouth, leaving her mull over those regretful words as the look of pain appeared on his face. Tears again dropped onto the ground, light hiccups coming out of his mouth.
He ruffled his hair, groaning. "Imai, I really thought you'd understand even if you're a bloody awkward turtle! I seem frustrating to you now because after everything we've been through, you're the one who's been the most frustrating! Through our ordeals, our times of happiness, you've never so much but shown an inch that you care! Am I really that blind to not notice if you really had any feelings for this relationship?" he demanded.
"You're not Mikan," she said frankly, fed up of his foolish, undoubting words. "You'll never be her. I was the one who thought you could be able to see through my intentions, my actions that I wished would speak louder than my insufferable words to you, but my actions never got through your thick head," she sighed.
He cackled, "So, it's because I'm not Mikan that I can't reach to you?"
"You never took the time to understand my intentions, everything behind my actions. You were always happy, and as you said, happy in my part. But when were you ever supportive? You may have thought you were being happy on my part, but has the thought of me not actually in the happy mood crossed your mind? You were always happy and you showed affection, but you were never there for me. You couldn't tell when I was feeling out of place, or when I was feeling lonely. You never took the time to ask me how I felt, because you were too damn busy being happy on my bloody part. Well, guess what. Screw you," she muttered angrily. With that, she walked away from the man she had ever loved, never once looking over her shoulder to see his figure crumple onto the grass as he silently cried.
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"Blue!" a student yelled as she shot her hand up eagerly.
Narumi nodded meekly, smiling in approval. "Good. So, tell me: why is the sky blue? Since you've already figured out what the colour of the sky is, can any of you tell me why the colour is blue?" he asked, a grin falling upon his features. He scanned the room, raising a brow as no hands rose in the air. "Well then," he rocked on his heel, "—that'll be your homework for today," he finished off happily. The students groaned, annoyed.
"Eh! But that's a stupid question!" a girl shouted. "Who'd want to do that?"
A few people raised their hands, flushing red from the attention casted to them. "Well, pushing aside the nerds!" the same girl shouted, shuddering. That was when she took action as she forced her hand to raise high in the air, chin high with audacity. "I-Imai?" the girl squeaked, slowly sitting back down. "Never mind," she muttered quietly. Narumi smiled crookedly at the purple-eyed girl, capable of seeing through the detachment and cold feeling running in her eyes.
"Good luck!" he dismissed the class, skipping out the classroom.
Why was the sky blue?
She didn't just look at the question in a scientific manner, but through her mind and opinions. Apart from the fact that oxygen, nitrogen, the atmosphere and sunlight were huge aspects in revealing the answer to the question, she felt the need to put herself in a different perspective. She grimaced; she had nothing in her mind to solve the mystery without the use of technology. She sighed, looking out the window. The colour of blue always amazed her, it looked so… indescribably awkward. If the sky were pink, it would appear more appealing and pretty. If it were yellow, the sky would turn out hideous and none would bother looking at it. Yet, the colour blue wasn't as stunning as pink, and not as disadvantaged as the colour yellow for a sky, making it awkward. It was not perfect or downright imperfect. There was no middle word between perfect and imperfect, leaving it indescribable.
She licked her lips, a small victory smile playing on her lips.
Not a day later did they anticipate the homework presentations. Narumi casually walked in, a smile on his lips. "Good morning students! I can't wait for your well-thought through answers for yesterday's homework I had given you to do," he announced, ignoring the spreading snickers heard from some of the trouble makers. "So then, why don't we start off with Mikan-chan!" he said, beckoning the brown-haired girl to come to the front.
The aforementioned girl shouted a loud "Yep!" and approached him, a large stack of paper in hand. "Well then, let me explain it to you! There is a physical phenomenon called Rayleigh scattering that causes light to scatter when it passes through particles that have a diameter one-tenth that of the wavelength of the light..." her anticipated presentation now turned into one of the most boring things they've ever heard.
Narumi coughed, grabbing the naive girl's attention. "Yes, Narumi-sensei?" her voice was coated with innocence.
"Mikan-chan, did you copy that from the internet?" he asked, raising his eyebrow accusingly.
She blushed furiously, stuttering her way out of it, "E-eh! Of c-course not." His demanding stare forced the truth to come out. She looked at her feet in shame as she sighed. "Yes, Narumi-sensei. Sorry, I just had no idea what to say..." she apologised.
Narumi let out a sigh. "It's okay; you can go sit back down, Mikan-chan. I'll let you off the hook for today; just remember you will someday face consequences for these sorts of things." She nodded, quickly walking back to her seat to bury her head in her table away from all the patronizing stares.
"Hotaru-chan, it's your turn to shine!" he chirped brightly, making way for the spotlight.
She cleared her throat as she walked towards him, handing him a piece of paper. "I'm not going to say it in front of the class, I'd rather die," she mumbled, walking back as soon as he grabbed it.
She looked up from her table just in time to see him smile at her answer. "Well, good job Hotaru-chan. I must applause you for this."
She simply shrugged, moving her attention onto another invention of hers.
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A thought had struck her, leaving her speechless. The way she interpreted the homework given to them from Narumi could somehow relate the situation she had faced a few weeks ago. The colour blue described their relationship that ended not too long ago. They made not a perfect or downright imperfect couple, and they were labeled somewhere in the middle of all this. Their love for each other was indescribably awkward; she was reluctant to shower him with affection whilst he was insistent on doing the opposite. They never seemed to work it out, yet their worlds revolved around each other.
I guess some things remain unanswered, for no one really knows why the sky is blue. Except for that idiot, Mikan.
She took in a breath, filling her lungs with air. "Sky!" she yelled on the school rooftop. Very out of character for a person like her, but what else but to get the lingering word off her mind after all these weeks. The sky was the only thing that remained in her mind, and now she knew why.
Hotaru Imai had to free her first love to the cool blue sky from her claws of awkwardness.
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That was when her gears started turning clock-wise once again.
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Hayate and Hotaru,
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simply made an impossibly awkward romance.
Okay, you may not get this one-shot, but I guess some things remain unanswered :P. Review if you likey. Thanks,
~Joy. P.S join the bold words in the story, it'll create a name.