Anything goes in love and war.
Actually, not everything.
It's not the same looking at an empty bed place next to me. The man I once loved was gone, well not gone, he walked out. We had got into a fight, and it had been the worst one yet. He had been late home and came in drunk, I wouldn't have minded because he was out for a night with his mates, it had been the lip-stick marks on his face, collar and on his lips. I had asked him what he'd done and he started yelling at me, swearing, telling me I was untrusting. Then he did the worst thing of all, he hit me. He actually hit me across the face. And here I am, curled up on my bed, crying my chocolate brown eyes out with my dark brown hair covering my face.
"Lexi…"
Oh god, he's back. Wait, he sounds as if he's been crying.
"Lexi, I'm so sorry. I don't know what came over me. I will get down on my knees and beg for forgiveness if you will just look at me."
I slowly raised my head and looked him in the eyes, those gorgeous black eyes that usually make me go weak in the knees but tonight make me want to hit him, make him feel what I feel.
"How can I forgive you? This has become a regular occurrence ever since the war. I'd have thought you would be thankful for life but you've just thrown it away and spat in everyones face who has tried to help. And just look what you've put not only me but your friends through. So explain to me how I am meant to forgive you. Explain to me."
I had started to yell by the end of it, and he had shrunk back and hung his head in shame.
He slowly stood but did not turn to the door; he started walking towards me until he stood before me, finally looking me in the eyes.
"If I remember correctly dear Alexis, you are no saint. Also, how am I to abandon friends that were never mine to begin with? They only put up with me because you swore that I had changed, hell they didn't recognise me to begin with due to the extreme changes."
"No Severus, they accepted you because they understood to some degree. To be truthful, I said nothing to them about accepting you I just said they should give you a chance and if they still didn't trust you then we would figure something out. I love you with all my heart but I would not have left the fight just to be with you. I didn't need you then and I don't now, I just want to be with you. I know I am not innocent, I am no saint, everyone knows that but I have paid for those sins ten fold. And Severus, I loved you before the changes, I loved you when you had the dark mark on your arm, and none of that stopped me. Severus it was the anger, the abuse. I'm gonna give you a home truth here Sev, you're slowly becoming Tobias, you're becoming your father."
He was again raised his hand and I flinched, but he placed his hand under my chin and lifted my face to look at him. I saw the concern in his eyes.
"I'm sorry Lexi, I know I can be cruel and spiteful but I am trying to change, please don't leave me alone. I can't be alone again."
It was then that I saw the man I fell in love with; there was no hate, no guilt, and no anger, nothing apart from love in those eyes of his. And, if it was possible I, Alexis Lupus Snape, fell in love with my husband, Severus Tobias Snape, all over again.