I Never Told You
He was all alone. He had nothing left. He was empty, completely empty. She was his whole world. The past three years had been the best in his whole life. He wasn't sure what he had ever done to deserve her love, but he must have done something right.
"I love you, James." Juliet told him through tears. She had known that she was going to die. The chain was tied around her was and was being pulled towards the electromagnetic force.
"Don't let go," Sawyer demanded although it was more of a plea, than a demand. He was holding on to her with all the strength he had in him. In all the years he had been alive, he had never been as in love with anyone as he was with her.
Despite all their efforts, the electromagnetic force claimed her. It had been the worst thing that he had ever witnessed in his whole life. He had been through so much in his life, but this was the hardest thing that he had ever experienced.
It made the situation one hundred times worse when they had found her buried underneath all the debris still alive. He had rushed to get to her, only for them to share one last kiss before she died in his arms.
"James," she said as she gasped for air, "kiss me." It had been her last request, the last thing she wanted him to do for her.
"You got it, Blondie," he told her as he brought his lips towards hers. The kiss was full of passion, both of them knowing that this could possibly be their last kiss.
"I have something to tell you," she said as they pulled away. "It's really, really important."
"You tell me," Sawyer told her as he continued to hold her in his arms. He waited for her to respond, but she never did.
"Juliet," He said as he looked down at her, "Juliet?" It was over, she was gone.
Now all that was left was her lifeless body in his arms. He began to cry, bringing her body close to his he began to sob into her hair. She was his whole world and now everything seemed to be crashing down around him.
After holding her and crying into her hair for about an hour, he finally found the strength to get her out of the whole. He made his way back to Jack, Kate, Hurley, and Miles. He didn't mutter a word to any of them, he just continued to carry her body.
He was broken. He had nothing left to live for.
He laid her body on the ground and sat down next to it. He just sat in complete silence not even making a sound. The others made their way over towards him, none of them saying a word.
After a while he decided that it was time to bury her, he needed this to be over. Kate had offered to help him, but he told her he didn't want her help. The truth was she wouldn't understand. The person that she loved was still alive, moving, breathing, and walking. Could she really relate to him? He didn't want to hear her tell him that she was sorry. In fact, he really didn't want to talk to her at all.
He decided that it was best to ask Miles to help him. Over the past three years they had become close friends. He knew that he could trust Miles and that Miles wouldn't ask him any questions. Sawyer also knew that Miles could tell him what Juliet had been trying to tell him before she died. Miles had a gift. He could hear people thoughts that they had right before they had died.
The rest of the group began to make their way towards the temple. Hurley had said they needed to go to the temple in order to save Sayid. Miles and Sawyer agreed to meet them there, since Hurley had said that they all had to go together according to Jacob.
"Will you do something for me?" Sawyer asked Miles, when he was sure the others were out of earshot.
"Anything, James," Miles answered him as he continued to dig the hole.
"Juliet said she had something very important to tell me right before she died," He told him as his tried to choke back the tears. "Do you think you could tell me what it was?"
"I will try," Miles said as he gave him a sympathetic look. He would do anything to make his friend smile again, but he knew that he couldn't reverse the events that had just unfolded. He bent down and huddled over Juliet's lifeless body. His whole body began to shake as he listened to her last thoughts. He wasn't sure he wanted to tell Sawyer what he had heard. The thought of it made him sick. If his friend wasn't already hurting, this was definitely going to throw him over the edge.
Miles stood up and tried to gather his thoughts as he watched his friends tear stained face stare at him waiting for an answer. He debated between tell him the new found secret or lying to him. It would be so much easier to tell him that she loved him, instead of telling him the truth. In the end he decided it best to tell him the truth, no matter how painful it may be.
"She wanted to tell you that she was pregnant," Miles whispered hoping that it would somehow be easier if his whispered it.
"What?" Sawyer asked him completely in shock of what he had just heard. He hadn't expected it. Sure it was possible, but it was still completely shocking.
"You were going to be a dad," Miles repeated a little louder this time. "I'm so sorry, James."
"Thanks for telling me," Sawyer told him as he went back to digging her grave. He felt numb. Not only had he just lost the love of his life, but he had also lost their baby.
He had planned to ask her to marry him. He had never really considered him the settle down kind of guy, but she had changed him. All he wanted was to marry her and live happily ever after, but now there was no hope of that happening. He was never really a religious man, but he hoped that there was some kind of afterlife where he would see her again. Until then he was left with only memories of their life together and for now that would have to be enough.
He knew that he would never find another, as long as he lived she would be his one and only. He would wait for her, no matter how long it took.
But for now he was meant to be alone.
"But I think some of us are meant to be alone."-Sawyer
Author's note: I have wanted to write this since the season six premiere, but I have not had time. When I first watched the premiere I thought that this is what Juliet was going to tell him. Anyway, sorry if someone has already written a fic about this, but I want to write my own thoughts about this. Please review and let me know what you think, I would love your feedback. I am also considering doing a one-shot about the afterlife and maybe talking about David being their baby. It will depend on how many reviews I get and if enough people are interested. So please let me know your thoughts.
