Inspired by "Time Is Running Out" by Muse. Not a songfic. RussiAmerica.
He clenched his hands into fists, feeling the smooth fabric of the sheets under his hands, gritting his teeth and resisting the urge to pull the gun out from under the pillow. Damn bastard... His silver hair tickled his shoulder, chest rising and falling slowly with each calm breath. The pipe on the table beside them only mocked him with its bloodstained shiny reflections. Muscles tense, he licked the blood from the corners of his mouth and watched time pass.
It was a rush of elation, beautiful pain that they both loved, warmth and cold together for one instant. One of them would eventually take the crown, and he could feel himself slipping and falling behind, like a noose yanking him back just as his fingertips grazed the edge of the summit.
Stunningly beautiful, but at the same time a paradox in himself. He couldn't stop, couldn't turn away. He lifted a hand, as if to touch his perfectly smooth, pale skin, and let it fall, seeing his fingers tangle instinctively with his. Of course he would never break his addiction, now that he could exercise the power over him. It wasn't love, it was hate - but weren't they both the same? He couldn't breathe, suddenly, and inhaled deeply his scent, the distinctive smell that was probably over everything he owned by now, because he couldn't bring himself to leave.
That childish giggle he always gave, that cute little smile as he stood half in shadow. So mysteriously alluring. He wanted to play the game, wanted to feel him under his touch - and at the same time, he felt as though he was clawing himself out of the grave he was digging for him. Like he was drowning, and for every foot he dropped he was one more breath of sweet air before he hit the bottom.
Time was running out, before he could never bring himself to leave his side, and purple eyes opened slowly and sleepily to watch him. "Alfred?" He murmured softly.
"Go back to sleep, Ivan."
And he did, leaving him back to his thoughts.
Did he even realize what this was? Love was as good as any, and they were both blind now, falling together. He felt like screaming out, just for someone to know as he fell, drowning.
Um...I don't know...