Pairing(s): Franken Stein/Spirit Albarn (Death Scythe)
Disclaimer: Soul Eater and all its characters are property of Ōkubo Atsushi. No copyright infringement is intended.
Written For: 30 Kisses (LJ Comm). Prompt: 26. if only I could make you mine.
Notes: One of those little starter fics I like to write for a new fandom, testing characterization and authorial voice. Might be later turned into part of a series or multi-chapter fic, but stands on its own. The secondary genre is listed as friendship since this is pre-slash, and the slash will develop from a friendship.

.

Spirit wasn't Stein's weapon any longer, and yet he still had to watch over him. Shinigami-sama's orders were as confusing as ever. He and Stein were separated only to be reattached in a lopsided fashion, like a sticker ripped off a notebook and then slapped onto a wall. He didn't know how to feel about that. But then, when it came to Stein, he never knew how to feel about anything. Well, aside from generic terror.

"Hello, senpai."

"Gah!" Spirit cried out and tripped over his own feet. He thrust his arms out as he fell to the floor, and his palms slapped against the cold surface. Everything in the damn laboratory was cold, especially the air. Spirit felt grateful for his suit jacket.

"I expect," Stein said, bent over his computer, his fingers dancing badly over the keyboard, "that you have a reason for breaking into my laboratory?"

"Just missed you is all!" Spirit said as he jumped back to his feet, palms still smarting.

Stein turned his face towards Spirit. The light of his computer screen glinted off his glasses, obscuring his expression. "I'm sure. Couldn't get to sleep without me, eh?"

Spirit glanced to the side. He hated it when Stein's glasses lit up. "Actually, I sleep better knowing you live across town from me and I have very good locks."

"I know. I'm working on my lockpicking skills, but it's taking longer than usual to crack these new ones you bought." Stein grinned, flashing white teeth around his cigarette.

"What kind of thing is that to say? Now I'm never gonna get any sleep!"

"I'm sure after a pleasant douhan with one of the girls from that club you're addicted to, you'll pass out quite easily."

Spirit scowled. "That's mean, Stein. Chupa Cabra's is closed for renovations this week."

"Is it, really? I don't frequent the establishment, myself."

"Of course not. You've got women throwing themselves at you left and right. Witches, Death Scythes, they all love you."

"Love might be too strong a description. As is the idea that they throw themselves at me. The only one I can recall that did that was Medusa, and that was in an attempt to disembowel me."

"Whatever. I don't get it. I was slapped by the last woman I asked out, and I'm way better-looking than you. Why are all the women chasing your tail?"

Stein turned back to his computer screen and continued typing. "Maybe they like my sparkling personality better." He took a final drag of his cigarette and stubbed it out. Within seconds, he popped another one between his lips. He fumbled around his desk and knocked over his lighter.

Spirit sighed and pulled out his own lighter. He clicked it and lit Stein's cigarette. "Feeling any better?"

"I wasn't aware that I was feeling poorly." Stein took a pull of his fresh cigarette and blew out a skull-shaped smoke plum. He turned his face so the light only glinted off one lens. He seemed to be eyeing Spirit in curiosity. "One would think I'd know."

Spirit frowned and tucked his lighter back into his coat pocket. "You know what I'm talking about."

"Do I? You seem to be quite the expert on what I feel and what I know today, senpai. I'm very flattered by all this attention."

"Dammit, Stein, stop fucking around. You're the super-genius. You have to know why I'm here."

Stein smiled again, his one visible eye crinkling. His smiled was lopsided. "Ah, yes. Shinigami-sama assigned you the onerous task of making sure I don't start randomly dissecting people for shits and giggles."

"Well, he wasn't so explicit about it. But yeah."

"Fear not. I've only dissected the houseplant Marie set on my desk yesterday." Stein tilted his head. "You'd be able to babysit me better if you were still assigned as my Weapon, you know."

"I'm Shinigama-sama's Weapon. My job is to stick with him."

"Lucky Shinigama-sama."

Spirit snorted. He would never get Stein. Then again, he didn't especially want to. Understanding Stein might mean he was crazy, too. "You sound jealous."

"Your expertise on me is astounding. Now you know what I sound like, too."

"Hey, that's a perfectly reasonable observation! I can know what you sound like! I can hear you, you know!"

Stein chuckled and tilted his head back, that one visible eye intently gazing at Spirit. "Perhaps I am jealous. You always were my favorite research subject." Ash flickered off his cigarette.

Beads of cold sweat prickled on Spirit's back. He hated when Stein looked at him like that. "I'm flattered. No, really," Spirit said, and loosened his collar.

"You should be." Stein snickered and turned back to his computer. "You can go tell Shinigama-sama that I'm having a good weekend. I'll be back to work on Monday, as usual."

"Great. I'll do that. Play nice with Marie's houseplants." Spirit turned around and exhaled. Sometimes, Stein was too intent to handle. He was always either cold or hot, nothing in between. Not entirely unlike Kami, though she'd been playing cold for years. One little indiscretion (every week for seven years), and she took it so personally. It wasn't like Spirit didn't love-

By the time Spirit reached the door, a flash of movement caught his eye, and a powerful weight knocked him against a wall. His breath burst out of him, and his head banged back against the stone wall. Blackness flashed across his vision. He blinked to clear his eyes and found Stein leering at him, face only inches away, cigarette practically touching Spirit's mouth. The heat stung his lips. Spirit swallowed the sudden flash of terror that burnt the back of his throat.

"What the hell, Stein?" Spirit demanded, his voice several octaves higher than he'd prefer it to be. His cold sweat trickled down towards the small of his back. He became keenly aware that Stein's palms pressed flat against the wall on either side of him, trapping him between his arms.

"I take it back," Stein explained, his voice strangely calm for a man wearing a smile that could create a long queue of people demanding restraining orders on him. "Maybe it's not such a great weekend."

"The second you bring out a scalpel, I'm going to pop a blade and bury it in your stomach, so back off," Spirit said. It would have been a great line, if he hadn't stammered every other word. Stupid Stein, and his stupid scary faces.

"Don't worry, senpai. That's not my current impulse."

"Fantastic. Mind backing off?"

"Yes, I'd mind that very much." Stein slowly extracted his cigarette from between his lips and breathed out another skull-shaped plume. Spirit coughed as the smoke played havoc with his nasal passageways. Tears sprung to his eyes. It distracted him from his escape, or so he told himself later.

Stein stubbed his cigarette out on the wall next to Spirit and leaned even closer, his face now practically touching Spirit's. The heat of his body warmed Spirit, making him forget the chill air of the laboratory. "You know, I think you are better-looking, senpai. All that pretty red hair, and your face has a much more pleasant shape." Stein wrapped his cold fingers around Spirit's throat, but he did not squeeze. "Lucky Shinigami-sama."

It vaguely occurred to Spirit that Stein was hitting on him. He felt a bit like Crona all of a sudden-he didn't know how to deal with that. His mind had absolutely no capacity for handling this situation. He just pressed back against the wall, the cold stone playing counter to the heat of Stein's body, his brain numb.

Stein leaned forward and brushed his lips against Spirit's, a feather soft touch that made Spirit's breath freeze in his lungs. Stein's fingers tightened ever so slightly, warming with applied pressure. "I suppose that's my punishment for failing to stop Asura's revival. My Weapon gets taken away."

Spirit gasped for air and finally convinced his arms to move. He gripped Stein's wrist with one hand. "Leggo. You're hurting."

"That's what they always say." Stein suddenly stepped back and removed his hand from Spirit's throat. He stared up at the ceiling, his face like the stone around him: blank except for the stitches winding across the surface.

Though his throat still stung, Spirit touched his mouth instead, finding them still warm from Stein's lips. He'd had plenty of women try to choke him (and not always because he cheated on them, thank you very much), and he couldn't even count how many women he'd brushed lips with. But never with a man, and certainly never with a man like Stein. As always, he didn't know how to feel about that. Fear, disgust, interest-fuck, where did interest come from?

"Okay, gotcha," Spirit said after clearing his throat. "Note to self, report to Shinigama-sama that Stein is doing great, except that Asura's madness is turning him gay. Nothing else of note to report." He sidled towards the exit, watching Stein carefully in case he made any sudden movements.

Stein chuckled, though he still stared up at the ceiling. "Nothing to report at all, because I haven't been turned into anything. I am as I've always been." He twisted the giant screw in his head. "But I'll admit a few of my inhibitions are slipping away."

Spirit didn't know what to say to that, so instead he ran out of the laboratory, not pausing to breathe until he'd made it to the surface. The moment he burst into the permanently twilit area, he started loosening his tie and stalked down the path. He finally stopped under one of the bare, crooked trees and touched his lips again. Stein never stopped surprising him. This time, he'd surprised Spirit so much that he'd surprised himself.

His lips still felt strangely warm.

Dammit. Maybe Asura's madness was turning him gay.