THE LESLIE REVELATION

A work of Fan Fiction based on "The Big Bang Theory"

SYNOPSIS: As a sequel to The Lunar Extraction, Leonard is shocked to find out the real reason Leslie Winkle dumped him.

DISCLAIMER: This is merely for entertainment purposes. I own no rights to this series or its characters. I will gladly leave that to Chuck Lorre, Warner Brothers, and CBS. Furthermore, this discourse contains language unsuitable for younger (under 18) readers.

Fallout from a Double Rejection

Dr. Leonard Hofstader returned to Apartment 4A inebriated, having been rejected earlier that evening by Dr. Leslie Winkle, his colleague at Caltech—then later by his neighbor Penny. When he tried to pressure Penny into intercourse, he was already drunk and despondent from how Leslie treated him earlier. After his second turndown, he went across the street to the 24/7 convenience store to buy some beer and wine coolers. He drowned his sorrows in liquor but was still sober enough to know that he had a text message on his phone.

He saw that this message was from Leslie; and being eager to find out if she had a change of heart, he downloaded the message. It read as follows: "Leonard, I know I have let you down in the past, and especially tonight. But I wouldn't consider myself a true friend and colleague if I did not confess to the truth of my actions. All the time I have known you, in more than one way, I confess that I used sex to get short-term gratification instead of seeking a committed relationship. The truth is, however, that I have found someone to share my life with for many years to come. That person is another woman I have known for several months. I confess, Leonard, that I enjoyed our trysts; but I feel it is time to move on with my life."

After reading this message, Leonard didn't even think about deleting it. He threw his phone down on the couch, unaware due to his alcohol-filled status, that it landed on his roommate Sheldon Cooper's sacred spot, and shouted out in despair, sure to wake many up at this belated hour, "Fucking lesbian!"

Penny's Reaction, and the Immediate Confusion

Across the hall in Apartment 4B, Penny had bedded down in anticipation of an early shift the next morning at The Cheesecake Factory. She was wearing a camisole with shorts long enough to be part of a two-piece bathing suit; but upon hearing her ex-boyfriend's shout of anger, she put on a pink robe made of wool that came down to her ankles. Running to 4A and banging probably louder than Leonard cried out a few minutes in the past, she hollered "Leonard Hofstader, who the hell do you think you're calling a lesbian?" When he opened the door, Leonard matched her volume with "I don't need any more shit from you tonight! You've already crapped on me once; and the way I feel right now, that is one fucking time too many!"

Before Penny could respond, Sheldon climbed up the stairs and to 4A—returning from a short date with Amy Farrah Fowler he was pressured into by a bogus profile his fellow Caltech researchers Howard and Raj put on a popular dating site. Unaware of what his friends were experiencing, Sheldon's first words before immediately entering his apartment were "Penny, isn't it a little too late for you to dress promiscuously?" Her reply was "Sheldon, you don't know what it's like to be promiscuous since you have not been romantically active as your asshole roommate has been."

Upon hearing this, Leonard responded with "Sheldon, there is a time and a place for you to be funny; but right now, sure isn't the damn time or place. Why don't you lock yourself in your room until dinner time tomorrow?" After analyzing what he heard for the past five minutes or so, he asked Penny "Is it true you are a lesbian? That probably explains why you have been so distant and cranky since you last had coitus with Leonard."

Walking back to 4B, all Penny could counter with is "Birds of a feather flock together; and how you two shitheads are acting right now, I am not really surprised!"

In the kitchen to prepare a chai latte for his grieving roommate, Sheldon tried to comfort Leonard by saying "The two of you were never compatible—you with a doctorate in Experimental Physics that you haven't really built on in the six years we've been friends, and her with just a couple of community college courses in low-tech fields like basket weaving." Once the latte was prepared, Leonard knocked it out of Sheldon's hand. Before Sheldon finished claiming a chapter-and-verse citation of his Roommate Agreement that applied to every jot and tittle of their co-existence in 4A, Leonard walked to his room in a huff.

Leonard in Isolation at Work

At lunch time the next day Sheldon, Raj, and Howard were dining together when Howard asked his two friends "Has anyone seen Leonard? I walked by his office; but when I knocked all he said was "Get lost and stay lost!" Raj's first gut reaction was "That is not the Leonard we know and love!"

Sheldon put down his tuna salad sandwich and explained what was going on. "Last night when I returned from that farce of a date with Amy Farrah Fowler, I heard Leonard use some expletives to describe Penny. Included therein was a comment about her wanting to date and be sexually active with someone who is not our gender."

Until then Howard was enjoying a bowl of taco soup for the first time, wishing his overbearing, highly cultured Jewish mother would make something like that to break the monotony of roast beef and meat loaf. For years he was highly critical of Sheldon's apparent wisecracks, and this was no exception. "So, you're saying Penny is a lesbian?" Sheldon followed up with "As sure as my mother is at church at least three times any given Sunday."

Raj was just thinking about how he could find a woman while simultaneously being sober. But he put down his bottle of water to think "Poor dude; he deserves better. I never thought Penny was that kind of woman." Sheldon explained to his dining companions the same thing he told Leonard the night before. Howard's response was "Sheldon, go get some damn empathy, because that is something you are sorely lacking right now. Leonard has experienced something he doesn't deserve; and he sure has hell doesn't deserve the excuse for comedy you're offering him right now!"

Howard and Raj, on the way back to their offices, made another trip to check on their despondent colleague. This time, however, there was no response. A few seconds later, Dr. Gablehauser, department chair, cornered Howard and Raj, explaining to them that Leonard was going to Berkley to sort his mind out. Raj thought "He has a better opportunity there than here at Caltech." But the department chair solemnly responded with "Boys, it's a personal and not a professional matter!"

Leonard Finally Explains His Despondency

The next morning Sheldon was taking a break from his never-ending pursuit of a breakthrough in String Theory to check his email. One message, also addressed to Howard and Raj, was starred "Urgent". Upon clicking on it, he could envision Leonard in the room with him: "Guys, I really want to apologize for how I've acted the last few days. The other night when you thought that I accused Penny of being a lesbian, it was not her; it was Leslie. I wanted to have casual sex with her; but after rejecting me I got a text from her. She told me that she is at peace with wanting to have a romantic relationship with a woman. A few months ago, she went to Berkley to interview for a tenure-track position that offered more than Caltech ever could. While there she met a professor of woman's studies with whom she felt an immediate bond. When she was offered her new position, she believed that it was the moment to pursue her new dreams in a personal and not just professional environment. Dr. Gablehauser has allowed me to be off work until Monday for me to regain my thoughts. Thank you for understanding."

When Sheldon got off work, he took the bus back to 4A, as neither Raj nor Howard were comfortable in letting him ride with him due to his somewhat hypocritical urges to critique their driving abilities. Swinging by for a brief visit at 4B, he engaged in his clockwork routine of knocking three times, announcing the name of the person he's visiting, and repeating this twice. All Penny could do is "What Sheldon? Are you here to presume on my sexual orientation like you did the other night when Leonard had his meltdown? And right now, I could really give a rat's ass for how he is doing."

"Wait, Penny", was what Sheldon uttered before getting a door slammed in his face. "Leonard was not insulting you. That night he tried to have coitus with Leslie Winkle before she rejected him, he came home and got a text from her. In it she told him that she was into a committed relationship with a woman in Berkley. She is teaching there, and probably going to be as inept as she was at Caltech; but that is beside the point; but Leonard took the rest of the week to gather his feelings."

Penny began to feel compassion for her former lover. "Oh, Sheldon! I know Leonard doesn't handle rejection very well—perhaps worse than you. But thanks for caring for your roommate, and for me. When Leonard gets back, I will have to make it up to him—as well as to you."

As Sheldon walked back to 4A, his final remark was "As long as I don't get his lactose intolerant dessert!" For the first time in what seemed to be an eternity, Penny let out a loud laugh.