Shoulda Let U Go, an one tree hill fanfic

Shoulda Let You Go

Disclaimer: I don't not own One Tree Hill or Shoulda Let You Go. Even Though I do Love both.

Just to think about it, I would do things that I would regret (tryna get you to)
To understand how I felt for you
I tried real hard time and time again but I
Didn't know my love wouldn't grow, I shoulda just let it go
But I, stayed around thinkin you would learn to love

She wrapped her arms around her tiny frame in an attempt to shield herself from the cool breeze that washed over them as she stood staring helplessly back at the boy she had once thought was the on for her. She tried so hard to act as if she was unaffected by everything that was happening, but she knew it was to no avail, she never was very good at lying, especially not to him.

He looked away for a moment, unable to bear the pain he felt as he watched the girl he had once loved so deeply fall apart in front of him, because of something he had done. He promised so many time that he would always be there, that he would always protect, that he would never hurt her and now here they stood, at a crossroad that both knew would change them forever.

She followed suit and looked away, but only for a moment. She swallowed hard and parted her lips, "Well aren't you going to say anything? Aren't you going to defend yourself, tell me how you're a guy and it's in your DNA or some bullshit. Come on. Tell me."

He flinched at the sharpness of her words and reluctantly regained eye contact with her. Something inside him broke at the sacred, pained expression that rested inside the hazel orbs that had once caused him to melt, "I'm sorry." It was all he could say.

A bitter laugh escaped her throat, "You're sorry? That's it? What the fuck do you mean you're sorry? Sorry for what? For lying to me? For breaking your promise? Or for fucking my best friend? And by the way Luke, the whole, naked in the back seat is so last year… it's like two years ago. I mean be original"

"For all of it."

And we both knew, you're wrong
There's nothing you can do, to ever undo what you've done to me
I loved you, deep in my heart I know you couldn't love me
But baby I just kept holding on, I shoulda let you go
Shoulda let you go

Her eyes narrowed and she shook her head, "Well too damn bad. Because you're apologies don't mean shit to me. Not any more." He looked down at the ground, "No, don't you dare. Look at me. If you're man enough to screw half my squad then you can be man enough to look me in the eye." His head slowly rose up and he shook his head. He glared hared, "I'm sorry did I miss something."

He shook his head once more before speaking, "Brooke, I've already apologized a thousand time. And it was one time. And it was a mistake. Peyton and I…we…it's over."

She clenched her jaw and before either of them knew what was happening her was holding his cheek and tears had begin to cascade down her pale cheeks, "STOP LYING TO ME! You fucking asshole."

Couldn't do without it, I felt I needed you in my world (to get me by)
More and more I looked out for you, tried to play me like a fool so I
Didn't care that love wasn't there, had to just let it go
Couldn't stay around, thinkin you would learn to love

He was genuinely confused, "Brooke, I told you. It's over. I haven't seen her since the party on Friday."

She scoffed, "Really? So today in the library, when you kissed in the Reference Section, what was that? What did she swallow your hall pass?" She laughed bitterly, "Or was she looking to swallow something else."

He stepped closer to her, his voice quiet, but still strong, "Don't go there, Brooke. This is not her fault."

"The hell it isn't. You…you're a guy and no matter how much I trusted you, I knew that this was a possibility. But she's a girl, not just any girl. My best friend. And where I come from that's suppose to mean something."

"It still does." His voice broke slightly.

It was her turn to shake her head, "No, no, not anymore. And apparently it never did."

He breathed his deeply, "Brooke, please, just tell me what to do." He pleaded desperation evident. He knew he had lost her as his girlfriend, but still he needed her in his life.

For a moment she remained silent, as did he, "Yeah, actually, Luke, there is? Why? Why her? Why did you do this?"

And now I'm gone, plus I'd rather be alone
We both grown, lower your tone over the phone, aaight
I shoulda known, damn I shoulda known
It wouldn't last long, when you didn't come home to me
And now I'm on, in the zone, handle business on my own
So respect the queen on the throne, aaight
Here's some strong advice, move on, that's life
You wrong or right, and I gotta letchu go

The innocence and pain that echoed in her whispers pierced the air and his heart, "I don't know. I guess…I was confused."

She scoffed in disgust, "Oh god, Luke, come on. Be a man. Use those balls for something else now. Come on. Tell me. Tell me why you don't want me, why I wasn't enough."

It scared him how quickly she changed, but what scared him more was the loss of emotion in her voice, "Brooke, please, I told you. I was confused, I didn't know what you wanted from me after that night at Tric. You tell me you don't want to be exclusive, that you wanted to keep your options open. Hell, you practically pushed Rachel head into my lap."

"That's it? That's your excuse. God you're pathetic. You're actually trying to blame this on me? You know what fuck you. I'm done. Sleep with whoever you want. Date who want. And more than anything else forget about me, oops, you already did that." She sniffled and turn to leave, but turned again, "And you want to know what I wanted Luke? What I wanted? I wanted you to fight for me! I want you to say that there is no one else that you could ever be with, that you'd rather be alone than without me. I wanted the Lucas Scott from the beach that night telling the whole world that he's the one for me. I just wanted you to want me back."

He watched as she turned to leave. He wanted to say something, anything to make her stay, but he couldn't. He was frozen, his voice lost to him in the night. All he could do was watch through tired eyes as she walked away, from him, from them, from everything. And that's when it hit him; she was only doing what he had already done so long ago.

He had no idea how they had gotten here. How something that had been so wonderful and so beautiful, could change so quickly, into something that neither of them could recognize.

He continued to watch her as she walked, slowly disappearing, and he began to realize she truly was gone. There was no coming back from this. He had pushed her too far, too hard. He'd lost her and what confused him and scared him the most was the fat that he wasn't sure if this is what he had wanted from the start.

Don't know why you would ever lie to me so,
But I shoulda letcha
Don't know why I could never let you go
Coulda, Shoulda, Letcha
Don't know why...