"There is only one happiness in this life, to love and be loved."
- George Sand
Disclaimer: I do not own Strange Magic or any of the musical lyrics used in this fic, they all belong to far more talented people than me.
NOTE:
This fic was originally an OC-insert being reborn as Marianne but the world-building got so intense that Marianne is still going to be different from canon!marianne but nowhere as different as my first draft oc-reborn-into-marianne idea.
I guess this fic is more of "a slightly different marianne due to culture and history of fairies". Also, due to all this world-building the relations between fairies and everyone else, being explored things will CHANGE.
If this is NOT your cup of tea then please hit the back space or the little "X" at the corner of your screen. I also decided to name Marianne and Dawn's mom "Kerria". Kerria are golden flowers and typically mean "Wealth, good luck, prosperity". Also there is a Hybrid Gallici Rose called Marianne. I am taking liberties and claiming that the flower Bog gives to Marianne during their romantic moonlight stroll is a "Marianne" flower.
Note 2:
BIG SHOUT OUT to Suzie-guru for letting me use the names for the Pixies. ANOTHER BIG SHOUT OUT to magic-moonlit-wings and suzie (again) for giving me feedback and helping me decide which way I wanted to go with this fic. Forgive me for any small mistakes you find, I tried to catch them all but I am only human. Also please be aware that the rest of the chapters will NOT be the same length as this one.
"Talking"
'Thinking'
"Brownies/Pixies Language"
Golden hair blew in the wind, as blue eyes lit up with joy at the sky. A sweet voice sang gently over the swaying flowers, as smooth small hands cradled her lower stomach in wonder. In the King's eyes, there was no other Fairy more beautiful than his beloved Queen Kerria, inside and out. Sunshine kissed hair, sky blue eyes, lightly tanned skin and beautiful orange wings, she was the perfect image of what the Meadow Court thought a "Summer" Fairy should look like. The ideal Fairy coloring and grace, all wrapped up in perfect slender package with a crown on top.
Giggling softly at the various fashion trends she had seen that summer season, Kerria twirled upwards before free falling into a giant tulip. Snuggling into the soft petals, a soft concerned voice slowly penetrated her childish musings over the more pompous Fairies fashion trends.
"Kerria? My love? Kerria, where are you?"
Peeking between the petals, Kerria smiled at the sight of her slightly greying husband. Oh, the scandal that had come from their union! While not in any way very old, the King of this Fairy Kingdom was noticeably older than his bride; at the very least, fifteen summer's older. It also didn't help that she was a foreign Fairy, originally a emissary from her home kingdom as a sign of the good relationship between the two realms. Young and foreign were not the things the court wanted from their ruling Queen.
Shaking away the dreary memories of her early days in court, Kerria refocused on her worried husband as Dagda fluttered from flower to flower looking for her. She sighed happily at his aggravated flying, he really was so adorable when flustered. Fluttering her wings, Kerria burst through the petals and into the startled embrace of her lover.
"There you are my love! I've been looking all over for you." Dagda's gentle embrace and caress of her hair melted Kerria's tension away. Her husband gave the best of hugs, not to smothering but not too loose either, just right.
"You really should be careful my heart. In your delicate condition-"
Kerria burst into startled giggles as she gently flew back to her tulip.
"Delicate condition? My love, I am pregnant not stuck with a deadly malady!" Smothering her laughs into her hands, Kerira snuggled back into the partially crumpled petals, "Delicate indeed!"
"Sweetness you can't blame me for being worried about you. After all this is our first child, and if anything should happen to you I..." His pause caught her attention, she had never heard her husband sound this vulnerable in public before. "I ...well, I'm afraid I would be lost without you. You are more than my Queen, you are my love."
A bright blush painted her cheeks as Kerria gently grasped his calloused hands. Honestly, this man's adorableness is too much sometimes.
"All right, I'll go back to the castle and rest, but only if you join me for some quality, tea time pampering. No excuses now!"
His groomed beard tickled her skin as he kissed her knuckles.
"As my Queen wishes."
"Winter?! The heir will be born in winter?!"
The head nursemaid fainted in shock as Kerria predicted the month her child would be born. All Fairy mother's could narrow down the season their babe would be born by the halfway mark of their pregnancy. They would be blessed with a dream that would reveal both the season and the sex of the child. It was tradition for the Queen to reveal the prediction solely to the head nursemaid of the castle and her King first, then in a few weeks time have a grand celebration where the season would be made public.
"What's wrong with that? Back home it was considered a sign of strength and endurance to be born in winter. Excellent qualities for a future Queen!"
Dagda's slight wince at her words reminded Kerria that no matter how many season's may pass, there were times where she still felt horribly out of place in the Meadow Kingdom.
"It's not that it's a bad thing per se, my love. It's simply that here in this realm, winter is a rare thing that we experience and because of this, many Winter Fairies are born very delicate and weak. Not to mention they typically have a...harder time being able to use flowers the same way a Spring or Summer Fairy can."
His warm hands caressed her cheek, as worried eyes glanced to her swollen belly. Loud groans abruptly reminded Kerria that the nursemaid was still in the room.
"Harder? Harder?! Your Majesty is too kind with his words, impossible is more like it!" Her voice grew shrill as she began to tug on hair, "Winter Fairies are positively pathetic in making any boutonnieres or any other traditional courting gifts!" The head nursemaid snatched a few flower petals from a nearby table before quickly rejuvenating it's colour and preparing it for a common hair potion ingredient.
"See that?! A Spring or Summer Fairy can make any flower ready for a common potion with the small amount of magic we have access to. Nay! Even an Autumn Fairy with enough diligence and practice can successfully prepare our flowers and plants into gifts and potion ingredients. But a Winter Fairy?!" Watching the older Fairy crush the flower petals into tiny bits, Kerria leaned back slightly at the crazed look in the head nursemaids eyes as she emphasized her point.
"Nothing but death and decay in their hands! It's absolutely unacceptable that the heir to our kingdom, which is most famously known for it's long periods of spring and summer, not to mention the realm with the most beautiful flowers, have a ruler born in winter!" Her fluttering wings and agitated hand wringing grew more and more pronounced as she began to list all the difficulties a winter Fairy would have as future Queen.
"Their hair is always a dark rotting looking brown, nay almost a black color, and their coloring can be so eerily pale, while their wings rare get any pigment at all! Why they look exactly like a, like a changeling! How can we ask the Court and your subjects to accept such a ruler?"
"Excuse me, but what is a Changeling?"
A pinched look stared back at Queen Kerria as the head nursemaid spat out what exactly a changeling was.
"An abomination of nature! The freak union between Faeries and Goblins! Luckily there hasn't been a changeling in this realm for over a thousand summer's." The utter disgust in her face clearly stated that their never would be a changeling child ever again if she could help it.
Kerria wondered what had caused such distrust and hatred between the Fairies and Goblins in this realm. The so called "changelings", while not common, were not that unusual back in her realm. Of course those kind of unions were more natural in the younger generations than the older ones. How strange that this realm was so against them since it had been proven that the children from those union helped in maintaining the magical health of the realm.
Noticing the nervous glance her husband threw her, Kerria felt a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach as her husband opened his mouth. Something told her she wouldn't like the next words out of his mouth.
"Perhaps we could say it'll be a Autumn babe? Then when the first snow falls we can claim the Goblins unbalanced the seasons and caused winter to arrive earlier than usual?"
"Dagda, honestly! There is no need to lie about the season our daughter will be born in." Sighing exasperatedly Kerria continued, "Besides how on earth could the Goblins influence the seasons? Don't the Brownies here shape the excess magic into the ground, which then influences the seasons?"
"Yes but that whole process is not well known to the Court and our subjects, we could easily convince them that the Goblins have upset the balance with ... something."
Dagda wilted under her unimpressed stare, clearly realizing that he was grasping at straws at that point.
The head nursemaid cleared her throat loudly before staring determinedly at the young Queen. "Your Majesty, I must insist that you claim your child as an Autumn Fairy. For the good of the Court and the peace of your subjects we cannot declare the girl as a Winter babe", her bright green eyes bore into Kerria's as she dictated what the Queen should do. "If you thought your ascension was rife with problems, that will pale in comparison to what your child will go through. Utter rejection shall be their fate. No Fairy in this kingdom will accept her rule as Queen. Not a single one."
'It shouldn't have to be this way', Kerria mused,' to have to lie to the entire Court that her child shall be an Autumn Fairy.'
Autumn Fairies while not as common as Spring or Summer Fairies, were seen as far more acceptable than Winter Fairies. They were also born with brown hair, but it lightened over the seasons, and while their wings were a little delicate, the colour would seep in no time, mostly being brown or different shades of dark green. Also while they weren't the most skilled gift makers or the most fashionably inclined as their Spring and Summer counterparts, they still managed to have the type of elegance that was accepted in polite society.
In order to completely fool her people of the truth, the head nursemaid was discretely preparing the potions necessary to change her daughter's hair colour into a lighter brown and some age appropriate wing strengthener ointments. Luckily for her husband and his subject's delicate sensibilities, it was tradition for the Queen to remove herself from the Court in the months leading to her giving birth. Complete isolation was needed for a safe birth for a Royal Fairy, or so claimed Dagda. An announcement would be made the day of her daughter's birth and a week long celebration would commence, but the Court would only be introduced to the heir in the beginning of spring. Her baby would be forced to live a lie her entire life, simply because this kingdom can't handle the idea of a Winter Fairy as their Queen.
'So what if she won't be the best boutonniere maker; or the most fashionable looking Queen or that she won't be skilled in making plants and flowers into potions? What does all that have to do with being a good ruler?'
Tonight's Announcing Celebration was loud and full of song, as her subjects sang to her their well wishes and hopes for their future ruler. The whole castle was brimming with magic as the Fairies created it through their singing. Songs of her daughter having her beauty, being graceful and delicate, to have a bubbly sweet voice, and to have bright beautiful wings.
'Vain. They're all so vain and shallow wishes.' Annoyance flashed through the young Queen, before she calmly reminded herself that they meant well and that there was no malice behind their songs.
Magic swirled gently as the singing continued to fill the halls, invisible to all but the most sensitive of Fairies.
'The Brownies are going to have a field day, molding this much excess magic into the realm.' Already she could see their furry bodies scuttling at the edges of the party, draining the magic from the air and filling it in the jugs they carried on their backs. Their adorable soft squeaks of excitement as they harvested the magic and scurried out the doors, brought a faint smile to her face.
'Sometimes I wish I was born a Brownie instead of a Fairy. They live such simple, happy lives; living with the elves at the border of the kingdom, happily taking care of the realm's magic and growing their own crops.' Sighing wistfully, Kerria mused how even though the Fairies here didn't look upon Brownies with equal respect, they didn't treat them as their servants either.
'Ignored and politely avoided till needed. Then, it'd be polite talk and respectful tones when negotiating food trades and asking how long a season would be.'
The fact that the Fairies here were forced to learn the Brownies' language instead of the Fairies forcing the Brownies to speak in their language was just the icing on the cake. The Queen delighted in anything that forced her vain, proud subjects to have to be humble and less egotistical about themselves.
'Amazing how everyone is politely ignoring and side stepping them,' Kerria noted that the Fairies in the room would quietly move to the side or fly upwards so as to avoid the Brownies, some even gave them a quick nod of the head before flying off to another part of the Hall.
A strong kick in her womb quickly snapped the young Queen from her musings, as her daughter made herself known to her mother for the first time. Cupping gently her stomach, Kerria smiled sweetly before quietly slipping out of the Great Hall. Walking into the Royal Garden's, she stretched her wings before gently flying upwards towards the Moon. It was night's like this that she missed her family and realm the most. When the moon was full and big like tonight, and there was a slight cool breeze in the air, Kerria could almost imagine she was flying over the balcony of her realm's palace. The flowers are beautiful here in the Meadow Kingdom, but she missed the great mountains that surrounded her old home.
Perhaps it was the sudden wave of homesickness that prompted her to softly sing an old winter song as she gazed at the bright full moon before her.
"Distant moon, so big and bright. Softest silver glowing through the night. High atop the mountain gold. Sun unseen, the world is cold."
Clasping her hands to her chest, she sang a little louder as she began gently swaying side to side.
"Here I wait, and here I stand. Early morning northern hour hand. Studying in solitude, looking for a hidden clue."
Remembering how difficult it could be at times here, with the different social rules and culture, fueled Kerria to sing a little more passionately. Some of the Brownies below stopped to listen to her song.
"I wish, to see this world through my own eyes. To calm, the elders and silence their cries." Clutching her small baby bump, she continued, "Because, of you I now gaze up and sing, the lullaby of the moon."
Floating back to the ground, Kerria made herself a promise; that no matter what, her daughter would know her mother's culture and songs. That they wouldn't die with Kerria but live on in her children.
The Brownies harvested the magic created from her song, but instead of immediately leaving, they began speaking softly among each other before the eldest Brownie walked towards her.
"Yes?"
"We congratulate you on the upcoming birth of your babe. She will be a fine Winter Fae."
Surprise flashed over Kerria's face before she managed to school it back to something more stoic but polite.
"Perhaps you missed the announcement, but the heir to this Kingdom has been declared to be an Autumn Fae."
Wise brown eyes peered at her from under thick brown locks of fur, "There is a cold strand of magic inside you, nurturing the child in your womb. Magic never lies, cold winds and snow is the season she'll be born."
Feeling conflicted for a moment, Kerria decided to take this chance to ask a few questions that had been nagging at her since she told her husband their child would be a Winter Fairy.
"Why do the Fae here dislike the winter season? And why do they hate Goblins so much? Back home we had tense relations at times, but never to the extent that is here."
A soft paw grasped her hand, gently cradling it as the Brownie glanced towards the Dark Forest Kingdom.
"Light Fae here have grown arrogant in their thinking. Believe that just because they live in long days of warmth and growth that they are better than the Goblins. Don't like to remember that Goblins are just Dark Fae. Winter strips them of their illusions, it is the season where the Light Fae are weak and all their potion's effects disappear. Their small magic and skills becomes dormant and their true selves are shown to each other." Warm eyes turned back from gazing at the distance to meet her own blue ones, "They don't like looking at themselves with all their imperfections for the world to see. In the winter the Dark Fae are more beautiful than the Light Fae. Their magic grows more powerful and enriches their bodies. Light Fae hate that, so they'd rather push all that truth away and live in a world filled with beautiful lies than deal with the brutal truth."
Kerria knew her husband could be vain; it was trait every fairy in this kingdom seemed to possess to some extent. But to hear that the basis of the Fairies hate for the Goblins was based on their inability to deal with themselves during their weakest time, just saddened her.
"Don't be sad Fae Queen, for your child will be a Winter Queen. They always force change to come the Kingdom. They are the breakers of illusions and the champions of truth; something dearly needed in this Kingdom."
Giving her one last pat on the hand, the Brownie picked up it's jar full of magic and left with all the other's waiting for them by the doors. Silence fell as the party started to die down and the Court dispersed back to their homes.
Kerria glanced around the garden, which was filled with the personal flowers of the ruling couples before her and her husband. For their wedding, Dagda had planted Kerria flowers around the border of the garden, a symbolic way to show how she cradled his heart.
'He always did love making grand romantic gestures.' she smiled wistfully.
It was tradition to name the heir after a flower in the Meadow Kingdom, but after that talk with the Brownies, Kerria didn't want to give her daughter just any old name.
'Dagda want's to name her Lily, after the mountain lilies he gave me on our first date. But our daughter is going to be a Winter Fairy and a Winter Queen. She will need something stronger, something that can mix the softness of the meadow with the toughness of the winter mountains of my home.'
Walking through the flowers, Kerria began to look for one that would have the right meaning for her daughter. An hour later and all she had to show for her search were aching wings and dashed hopes.
"My love? What are you doing out here in dark? The celebration is over."
Glancing over her shoulder, Kerria saw her husband staring at her with loving concern. "I'm sorry Dagda, I was just trying to find the perfect name for our baby."
Warm hands caressed her shoulders, as she was gently tucked into his chest and under his chin.
"We still have time for that kind of thing, you shouldn't stress yourself over that." Kerria smiled as he kissed her forehead and began to softly sing his courting song to her.
"Wise men say, only fools rush in. But I can't help falling in love with you."
Clasping his hand to her baby bump, the young Queen sighed contently as her husband sang in her ear and their child gently shifted inside her.
'Dagda's right, we still have time to find the perfect name.'
The days rolled by and soon summer had ended and the Kingdom was reaching the pinnacle of the autumn season. The Court was brimming with energy for the day the announcement would arrive that their new future queen would be born. Queen Kerria had been in mandatory isolation and confinement for a few weeks now and was ready to have the entire thing over with. The hours filled with silence did nothing to stop the growing stress of having to lie to not just her kingdom but most importantly her child; culminating in her days filled with stress fevers.
Pacing slowly in the confines of her bedroom, Kerria tried to calm her spiraling negative thoughts with deep breaths.
'In. Out. In. Out. ' Dragging her hands through her unruly hair, she tried to control her growing anxiety, 'You got this Kerria, it's going to be okay. Just breathe and stay healthy, don't over think it. It's all going to be fine.'
Pinching the bridge of her nose lightly, she tried counting and slowing down her breathing to match it.
'1. Breath in. 2. Breath out.3 Breath in. 4 Breath out. 5...'
Tears of frustration pricked the corner of her eyes as she glanced at the calendar on her wall, with the fake due date scheduled in two days time. Losing her internal counting, she began to breathe even heavier as it hit her once more of how big the lie they were telling is, and how her child would never be able to escape it's effects.
'What am I doing? What are we doing? My baby doesn't deserve this. What kind of mother am I?'
Sliding down to the floor, Kerria gave herself a hug, breathing erratically as tears fell from her eyes. She could easily see it; her daughter questioning on why she was different and being unable to know the truth. The constant pressure and judgement of living up to the standards of an Autumn Fairy. Of having to hide any part of her that just screamed Winter.
"I can't do this!" It seemed the horror of her child's future and the extent of her failure as a mother just stole all the air from her lungs, "Oh my stars, I can't do this! I can't can't can't can't -"
The world went fuzzy, as if she had stuck her head underwater. Her body felt cold and her heartbeat was loud in her ears. She just wanted all of this to be over.
Warmth spread through her body as strong arms encircled her, and a comforting scent filled her nose as she melted into the embrace. A soft soothing voice was singing in her ear, as she was gently rocked back and forth into a strong, firm body.
'Dagda.' She sighed deeply as she calmed in his embrace, the words finally filtering into her mind.
"- Do I love you because you're wonderful? Or are you wonderful because I want you? Are you the sweet invention of a lover's dream? Or are you really as beautiful as you seem?"
Picking up where he left off, Kerria found the energy to sing back to him, "Am I making believe I see in you, a man too perfect to be really true? Do I want you because you're wonderful? Or are you wonderful because I want you?"
Feeling the harmony between them, she leaned forward so their foreheads where touching and they were both almost singing the final lines against each other's lips.
"Are you the sweet invention of a lover's dream? Or are you really as beautiful as you seem?"
Closing her eyes, Kerria felt peace where before she had felt nothing but terror. Dagda always knew how to calm her down when she had worked herself up like this.
"What's wrong my love? How can I help you?"
She sighed again as he cradled her head with his warm hands.
"It's just...it's complicated."
Soft kisses peppered her face as she tried to get her words together.
"Just try and tell me. I'm your husband my love; we're partners who have each other to support and help one another. So let me try and talk to me."
Tears slipped from her eyes as she looked up at his hopeful face.
"I...I'm so sorry Dagda, but-but I can't do this."
Confusion bloomed across his face as his eyes searched her own, trying to understand what she meant.
"I...I can't lie to our daughter! I can't watch her suffer as she hides her very nature and for what? For what Dagda? Superstition?!"
For a moment Kerria almost hated her husband as she watched his eyes softening to understanding and something that looked very close to pity filled his face.
Reaching out a hand to stroke her cheek Dagda began to speak in a soft patronizing voice, "My love -"
"NO!"
Pushing herself out of his arms, she fluttered her wings in anger as she began to walk towards the door. Everything was building up inside her and she was feeling sick of everything. Sick of being isolated in these walls, sick of lying to her subjects, sick of not being able to practice her songs and small magic in this kingdom because it 'makes the subjects nervous' with how foreign it is.
She could hear her husband scrambling to catch up to her and gently reaching out to touch her arms.
"Kerria, please calm down and think of the baby-"
His words only seemed to infuriate her as she whipped around and roared in his face. Her wings flared out behind her as she stood on her tippy toes to look into his eyes.
"I AM! THAT'S ALL I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT THESE WEEKS STUCK IN THIS MAGIC DAMNED ROOM!"
Dagda backed down and stared at her as she breathed heavily and slowly lowered herself back onto the ground. Tears spilled from his cheeks as he gently reached out again to her face, her own cheeks stained with tears.
"I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry. I should have listened to you, I should have paid attention to your discomfort over all of this. I should have asked you more on your feelings about this."
His hands were so gentle as he wiped her tears away and slowly moved her back into his arms; doing it all so softly so that she could resist and break away if she wanted to. She didn't.
"I'll listen now. So please my heart, tell me your worries about all this and then please listen to mine alright?"
Taking a deep shuddering breath, Kerria smiled shakily and leaned into his embrace.
"All right. So my biggest concern over all of this is the fact that we will be lying to our daughter and forcing her to pretend to be something she's not. I don't want that for our child Dagda." Sniffling softly as snuggling into his arms, Keirra continued, "plus I hate being here all alone. I know it's tradition in this realm to isolate the Queen for the whole last part of the pregnancy but it really doesn't help. I hate being alone with my thoughts, I just want you to be with me."
Her husband gently stroked her hair before pulling back to stare at her eyes.
"Alright. I will schedule with my advisors a free day every week so I can come visit you more often but unfortunately that is the very best that I can do."
Resignation filled her at his words, that would still leave her with six days of being alone and without his arms to comfort her. If Kerria was already asleep in the evenings when Dagda returned, he would decide to go to one of the palace guest rooms so as not to disturb her rest. Even when he did arrive while she was awake, he was too exhausted to do much but sleep, which did not help the lonely days at all.
"So long as you try and visit me more often I'll take what I can Dadga. I love you and I hate how alone I've been during this pregnancy. Why do I even have to be isolated anyway? The head nursemaid didn't explain very well besides screeching about tradition."
Her husband chuckled as she pouted up at him, before sneaking a kiss on her nose.
"That I can explain, so the reason why isolation is necessary for a pregnant Fairy here is due to the very way our excess magic is shaped by the Brownies." Picking her up into a bridal carry, Dagda flew towards the window and peered to where one could spot little furry brown dots working in the distance. "As you know the Brownies take our excess magic that we produce through our singing and weave it into the land, thus bring forth the seasons. Since a Fairy is influenced by the season they are born, in the last few months, an unborn Fairy becomes more and more sensitive to the magics around them." Placing her onto the ground, Kerria watched her husband gently cup her stomach before leaning down to kiss her baby bump.
"It can be dangerous to their health if they are exposed to magics outside of their mother's and the season they are born in."
A twinge of fear ran through her heart at his words, causing Kerria to take a few steps back and to clutch her womb protectively.
"So it's dangerous for the baby for you to be here?"
Kerria watched him shake his head before sitting down on one of her chairs by the window.
"No. I would never risk your health if that was the case. I am your husband and the other parent to our child. My magic is safe for her, in fact if we were a normal Fairy couple, I would be with you during your isolation and helping you in every step of the way. Unfortunately..."
Her husband trailed off before reaching up and taking off his crown. Kerria understood immediately what he didn't want to voice.
"Unfortunately you are the King and I am the Queen."
"Yes, and I have responsibilities to the Kingdom."
A silence filled the space between them as they stared at the glistening gold crown in his hands. After what seemed like hours, though in truth was probably minutes, Dagda placed the crown on the ledge of the window before standing up and making his way to where she stood.
His eyes were intense as he slowly closed the distance between them. Kerria felt a little weak in the knees as his eyes smouldered with love and resolve.
"In regards to your other concerns, I'm afraid we are going to have to compromise. I promise we will never lie to our daughter regarding the truth of who she is and that we will build a space for her here in our home where she will be free to be who she truly is without censure. However in exchange she will have to take special lessons to help her fit in better when she is outside and among the rest of our people."
Her eyes watered as a part of her sighed in relief yet she could not smother the other part that raged against lying to the world about the truth.
"Is that the best we can do for our little girl Dagda?"
She reached out towards him and melted a little as he met her half way and pulled their joined hands to his lips before raining kisses on her knuckles.
"Yes, however just because the Kingdom isn't ready for a Winter Queen right now doesn't mean they'll never be ready." A mischievous glint twinkled in his eyes as her lips began to slowly stretch into a smile.
"I'm sure that our subjects will learn to love our daughter as much as we will. It is my hope that through that love they will grow to accept her quirks so when the day comes that she reveals herself to our subjects as a Winter Fairy their love for her will be so strong that it will overcome the ...reservations our people have."
She loved when he spoke passionately like this; it's what convinced her that he was a good King and once they were married, a good husband and father.
"That's a lovely hope...dear can you please explain to me again why Winter Fairies are so disliked? I'm afraid I still don't understand why having certain skills with flowers are important, or being the most fashionable with bright colours or looking like the embodiment of summer have anything to do with being a good ruler."
A soft sigh escaped his lips and tickled the fingers still pressed against his mouth.
"It's a long story, but the short of it is that Winter Fairies are too similar to temperament to Goblins. They are rough and more aggressive than regular fairies, not to mention they are born small and weaker in health compared to other fairies. Most don't make it past a few months before fading away, and those that do survive typically have more delicate and weaker wings," Kerria was entranced as she listened with growing horror at the possibility of her child not living past a few months due to being born in Winter. This had never happened back in her realm.
Her husband continued, as he stroke her hands and stared into her watery blue eyes.
"It takes a lot of work and potions to bring their health up and while my Kingdom is more prosperous than others, the sad truth is that not everyone can afford to make all of the potions that are necessary, some ingredients are just much harder to find and harvest properly without the right connections and wealth. Not to mention having a lack of skill in making these potions causes...discomfort in their social lives, since having to buy them is seen as bit of an embarrassment. Our trinkets and gifts that we make from the plants for our courting rituals are very important in helping express our love for our special someone to the world. Couples have been heavily judged based on what their spouse has made for them. And yes you don't have to be the most fashionable Fairy to be accepted however it is seen as a good way to flaunt your eligibility, status and wealth to other potential suitors; it has also been a source of pride for our people that our rulers are the most fashionable of all; after all, aren't the most beautiful flowers picked to make a bouquet?"
Silent tears fell from Queen Kerria's face as she listened to the harsh reality of what living in the Meadow Kingdom meant as a Winter Fairy.
"I know this all sounds frivolous to you my darling, but you have to understand that these are not things that were decided upon just recently. All of these views and ideas have been in place since the foundation of our Kingdom and have become a form of identity for our people." Leaning forward he kissed away her tears.
"Over the years all of these things, big and small, have accumulated to Winter Fairies being considered bad luck and a source of shame for many families. They just don't fit in as easily as the other kind of Fairies and while I am the King, not even I can stop the harmful whispers and social ostracism that follow them wherever they go."
Turning her hands over, Kerria shivered as her husband kissed her palms. "Personally I think it's the fact that all of the Winter Fairies that made it to adulthood have been too similar to goblins for my people to accept them into society. Many become outcasts and chose to petition the ruling King and Queen for permission to travel to another Fairy realm where they will be accepted. It has been over fifty years since a Winter Fairy was born here, and as future Queen, our daughter would never be able to escape to another realm."
Giving her palm a final kiss, he straightened his posture as he gently squeezed her hands.
"So knowing all this, is it wrong that I try and make things as easy for our daughter as possible? That I lie to our subjects so she will escape some of the torment some ignorant Fairies will give her? It'll be easier for her rule if she has a Kingdom who has grown to love her due to a lie than having to watch her fight to get basic respect over an aspect you and I can't change."
Leaning forward, Kerria gently shared a soft kiss with her husband before leaning her forehead against his.
"Okay. I'll lie to our Kingdom and I'll teach our daughter to lie too, but I won't like it. I understand better now, but I still don't like it."
Nuzzling his nose against hers, Dagda softly whispered, "No my love, we both will teach her to lie, and hopefully one day she will have a King to stand by her and help her rule be stronger through the love they share. Just like how your love has made mine more stronger than ever before."
Two days passed quickly and before Kerria knew it the 'birth' of the young heir was announced. The entire Meadow Kingdom rejoiced as their heir was 'born' in the middle of the day on a clear sunny autumn day, one of the last few warm summer days before the long dreaded winter arrived. The entire day was filled with food, singing and laughter as the King accepted the congratulations of his people on behalf of his queen, with the head nursemaid by his side, as she gossiped about how lovely the babe was and how much of a pleasure and honour it would be to assist the queen in the following months till the Spring Presentation.
"UGH! I've had enough!"
The sound of a book hitting the wall echoed in the room, as the young Queen made her way to the windows to watch the final moments of the sunset. Sighing in exasperation, Kerria starred at the beautiful pink and purple painted sky and wondered if she should risk sneaking out for a few hours, just to get out of these four walls and her depressing thoughts. It had been weeks since the announcement of her daughter's 'birth' and dark thoughts had been circling in her mind again. She had tried distracting herself by reading through various books of flower names, but instead had gotten more and more worked up as each name seemed to missing that 'something' she was looking for.
"Hmmm, Dagda is going to be busy at court today and won't have time to come back here till after the elven festival tonight which probably won't end till around midnight, so maybe..." Kerria mused to herself as she starred at the horizon where the border of the Dark Forest and the Meadow Kingdom lay,"Maybe I can go search for the perfect name for my baby near the border of the two Kingdom's! It's the only place I haven't looked yet."
Fluttering her wings in excitement, she carefully checked to make sure there were no servants bringing her food in the hallway, before wobbling towards the window. She flew from her balcony to the ground and sneaked her way carefully over the castle walls, something a bit more tricky with her round stomach. The good thing was that everyone was so used to wings that they never bothered to look down to the ground in this realm.
Flying low, she swiftly made it to where the meadow turned into the forest. The primroses where one of the few flowers still in bloom, hinting that the Sugar Plum Fairy must be extending their life for the upcoming winter matchmaking frenzy in the Dark Forest Kingdom. Dagda had told her that the Goblins enjoyed their own festivals and that apparently they had a special one where the Sugar Plum Fairy would visit and help them get together with the one they love.
Making her way under the moonlight, Kerria quickly spotted a partially hidden path. Walking under giant tree roots, she began peeking into nearby shrubs, searching high and low for the perfect inspiration to name her daughter. It had been just a little over an hour, with various breaks, when a a young but strong voice broke her thoughts and halted her searching.
"Hey you! Fairy! What are you doing here?!"
Twirling around gracefully, Kerria stared at the most gangly looking goblin she had ever from his cracking voice and size of his wings, he must be just on the cups of adulthood. Raising an eyebrow at his scowl, she noted that he had pretty blue eyes and that his wings were slightly torn, all wrapped in a prickly and scaly looking package.
"...Prince Bog?"
"Whose asking?!"
Kerria giggled as his voice cracked a little at the end and he hunched further into a more defensive stance. Give it a few years and she could see him become quite the intimidating goblin. Also, she'd never tell her husband, but she bet that once the young prince grew into it, his older voice would be sinful to listen to as well.
"I am Queen Kerria of the Meadow Kingdom, your highness."
Piercing blue eyes scanned her from top to bottom before getting stuck at her stomach. His face made a strange grimace as she watched the young goblin try and wrap his mind around her current state.
"...yer pregnant."
"And you're blunt."
Giggling at his deadpan stare, Kerria fluttered closer, noting with amusement that he seemed torn between stepping away from her and reaching out to steady her when she wobbled a bit.
"Do you have an escort or something? I can't imagine the Fairy King letting his precious Queen roam the Dark Forest alone."
Stopping just steps away from him, Kerria noticed how his eyes shifted around, trying to spot someone that might have come with her.
"You're absolutely right, which is why I sneaked out of my rooms and popped for a quick peek over here."
Prince Bog whipped his head back to face her as a look of complete disbelief covered his face.
"Yer here alone?! What were you thinking?! The Dark Forest isn't a place where a pregnant Fairy can just waltz in without a care in the world and then just waltz back out as if it's a midsummer's day walk in the Meadow Kingdom! It's dangerous here! The very plants and animals are dangerous here! Goblins are dangerous! I'm dangerous!"
Waving his arms about and fluttering his wings in aggravation, Kerria suppressed her laughter at the site of the young prince trying to snarl at her and look intimidating. He probably wouldn't thank her for this but all she wanted to do was hug him and feed him some sweets to get that look of his face.
"Well then, why don't you help me find what I'm looking for. After all the sooner I find it, the sooner I'll be out of your scales."
Kerria smiled as he gave her a suspicious look before cautiously stalking closer, "And what exactly is so important that you'd risk your unborn bairn exposure to a Goblin such as myself?"
"A name."
"Huh?!"
Giggling at his flabbergasted look, she flew towards another bush and began to inspect it.
"I'm looking for the perfect plant, preferably a flower, to name my child."
A loud exasperated sigh echoed behind her causing her to turn around and witness the future king of the goblins face palm. Giggling at his pained look, Bog slowly pulled his face from his palm, his voice getting louder with each word he spoke.
"Yer all the way in the Dark Forest for a bloody plant name to give to yer bairn?"As his eyes twinkled with a smouldering anger, Kerria once again thought that he'd grow up to be a devastating looking goblin. "Are you completely mad ?!"
"No, I'm just pregnant."
Bemusement filled her as she watched him look up at the sky with a 'why me?' face before grumbling and mumbling to himself on the stupidity of fairies and how it was a miracle they had managed to survive this long.
"So you'll help me?"
She grasped her hands together and placed them under her chin as she looked at him with big round eyes. This never failed to get Dagda to cave to her more...adventurous ideas.
"FINE! But let's make this snappy! I dinnae want ye here for too long!"
"Did you know your accent gets more rough and growly the more you get upset? That must drive all the Goblin ladies wild. Or goblin boys, I'm not judging."
Kerria smiled even harder as a bright flush crossed his cheeks as his eyes grew wide and his jaw dropped at her boldness to say such a thing.
"Why you-!"
Grabbing his hand, she interrupted whatever he was going to say, and pulled him further into the Forest.
"Now, what kind of flowers do you have around here?"
After an hour of walking around Kerria had managed to pry out from her companion that; Bog was born in Winter (a common season for Goblins), had a well meaning but nagging mother, his father died years ago and his mother was currently the ruler of the Dark Forest, he was supposed to be at the party currently being held but had runaway ("I dinnae run away! I ...just needed a bit of air") due to being love struck by the 'prettiest goblin he ever did see'. Young Prince Bog was surprisingly romantic as he gushed about how kind and pretty and smart and thoughtful this young Goblin Lass is. The only mar to this meeting was that she still couldn't find the perfect name for her daughter.
"Ugh! We must have looked through a dozen flower patches in here and still! Still no name!" Slumping next to a tree root, Kerria sighed in despair, "Maybe my baby is doomed to be nameless."
An awkward cough broke her gloomy thoughts as Bog sat next to her and twiddled his thumbs as he nervously cleared his throat.
"Well, actually...there is one area I haven't taken you yet."
Peering at his face, she noticed he couldn't keep her stare and instead kept glancing to the side.
"It's close by so you don't have to bellyache about your feet so much."
"Why didn't you take me there first?"
She noticed he gulped loudly before trying to meet her eyes and immediately looking away.
"Well, that is..." Straining her ears she tried to catch what he mumbled into his hands.
"Excuse me? Could you speak louder?"
Puzzlement filled her as he mumbled again.
"Prince Bog? I still can't hear you."
Watching him blush completely in embarrassment, Bog took a deep breath before turning to look at her and practically shouted in her ear.
"THE FLOWERS WERE GROWN BY ME AND ARE MY FAVOURITE! YE HAPPY NOW?!"
Perking up in glee Kerria squealed in excitment, "Oh my stars, you grew flowers?! That's amazing! What are they called? How do they look like? Do you use some form of Goblin magic in your growing? How long do they take to grow? Can I see them?! Please!"
Bouncing up with renewed energy, Kerria fluttered her wings in glee as Bog grew more bashful and turned away to hide a small grin with a loud cough.
"They have no official name but maybe they'll inspire you enough so you can go away! They're past the Venus Flytraps, so hurry up!"
Gazing at the Venus Flytraps she wondered if naming her child after a bug eating plant would be too much for her people.
'Probably. They might even riot against such a name.'
Waddling behind Prince Bog, the smell hit her before she even saw them, a small patch of dark blue looking roses blooming in the shade of a giant tree. They had a sweet smell, and seemed delicate and almost out of place here. The colours ranged from a midnight blue to a navy blue, giving the flower a dark and mysterious air. She knew these flowers; in fact the last time she saw them was on her last day in her realm before moving permanently to this one.
Tears fell from her eyes as memories of a loving father showing his daughter these flowers flashed before her. She must have been only a few seasons old when she first saw these plants. Goblin grown and a gift to her Fairy King as a sign of unity between the two Kingdoms, they had littered the entrance of the Fairy and Goblin palaces.
"No one remembers what these things are called so I named them Moon Blossoms, for lack of a better name, since they seem to only grow and bloom in moonlight."
"... I know their name."
She vaguely noted the young prince croak out a "what?" before going deadly still at the sight of her tear stained face.
"I...I can't believe I actually forgot them. They were my father's favourite flower...how did I forget?"
A long gnarled hand awkwardly patted her shoulder as she began to sob uncontrollably into her hands.
"Um, there, there. Uh, better late than never I suppose."
Kerria felt the hand pull away from her shoulder before something soft brushed against her knuckles. Peeking between her fingers, she could only stare as a perfect dark flower was presented to her by the most awkward and uncomfortable looking prince.
"Soooo what are these things really called? Not that we'll actually use the name, after all it's been such a long time and honestly Goblins aren't the best of remembering flower names anyway, but just out of curiosity..."
Brushing away her tears, Kerria reached out and gently cradled the offered flower.
"Marianne."
"What?"
Looking up from the precious memory in her hands, Kerria could only smile as Prince Bog starred at her in befuddlement.
"They're called Marianne."
Reaching the edge of the Dark Forest, Kerria could spot the bright lights and music of the elven festival going underway.
"Well you got your name and you got your flower so hurry along and go back to your King."
Turning around, Kerria gave the young prince a quick hug before fluttering out of reach. His face was flushed at her bold gesture, making his fierce scowl look adorable in her eyes.
"Phhft! Fairies! Now don't you dare come back unless it's a politics thing ye hear? You're lucky I was so merciful and didn't eat you when I found you. Next time you might not be so lucky."
Hiding a laugh, Kerria cheerfully waved as he fluttered his wings threateningly at her before flying off back into the Forest.
'He's going to grow up to be such an adorable ruler.'
Glancing to make sure her flower hadn't slipped from her hands, Kerria quickly glided between the shadow of the flowers, making sure to stay low and not let any wandering royal guard or Elf spot her. It was useless to hide from the Brownies, they could spot fairy magic a mile away.
Peeking through the grass, she could see her husband, looking all handsome and dashing as he smiled at the Elves and made small talk with both his guards and the older Elven men sitting near him. She couldn't stop herself from sighing dreamily at seeing her love smile so charmingly at his subjects. Shaking her head lightly, she managed to pull her eyes away from her love in time to duck behind a large rock, as her husband glanced to where she had just been standing.
Gripping her Marianne flower, Kerria peered to make sure no one was looking before silently gliding away from the border and closer to the Fairy castle. After all the festivities were almost finished and it would be in bad form for her husband to get home and find her missing.
'I'll just keep this adventure a secret from him. No need to stress him out even more than he already is.'
Reaching her balcony, the young Queen quickly slipped into her room and changed into her nightgown. It had been a tiring evening and she was ready for a little relaxation.
Cradling the small flower, Kerria couldn't help but wish her father and mother were here with her. She would never regret helping her realm and meeting her husband but that wouldn't stop the pangs of homesickness she would get.
Making her way to her personal trunk, she quickly rummaged through it, finding a plain looking book filled with press flowers and petals on top of a mahogany carved box. Carefully removing the book, she made her way to her favourite reading chair by the windows, and flipped to a blank page. Marking the date and her adventure in the back of the page, she quickly placed the Marianne flower over the page until she was satisfied with its position.
Pressing the flower into the pages, Kerria began to sing her parent's courting song. Her baby gently kicking against her as the sound of her song filled the room.
"Lost in the darkest blue, endless labyrinths weaving through, will you stagger on with no star to light your way?"
Memories of a blonde man with piercing purple eyes and a woman with dark hair and blue eyes filled her mind as she swayed softly in her chair.
"Share with me your tears, all your troubles and deepest fears. I remember when you chased all my shadows away."
Stroking her baby bump, Kerria let herself go back and remember everything that she had left behind as she sang a little louder in the room.
"Won't you take my hand, come away with me from this land? Let me give to you all that you have given to me."
Flashbacks of wings fluttering below the moonlight as they took their evening family strolls and meeting the goblin delegates as they worked into the night, dancing under the stars as her parents held hands behind her, all of those wonderful moments of her childhood.
"Fly horizon bound, find the moon behind darkening clouds. Even far apart, know our souls together will be."
Kerria remembered all of those lovely winters spent flying in the snow with dear friends, as they raced from the base of the oldest tree to the palace entrance. The moments after the race where she would meet up with her parents and enjoy an evening snuggled up in front of the fire as they listened to the wind and snow howl and rage into the night.
"When the storm draws nigh, dreams will shatter before your eyes. Know that you're not alone."
Painful moments of her father getting sick and slowly withering away to nothing as her mother looked frantically for a cure. The joy and gratefulness rushing through her as the King and Queen used their magic to heal him back to health, bringing her family into their eternal debt and prompting Kerria into studying to be an ambassador. The absolute thrill and terror in gaining the position and being assigned to the Meadow Kingdom, never to return. The bittersweet sorrow in getting a parting gift from her parents and the exhilaration of the power behind the pure raw magic cast by the King and Queen to spirit her away to another realm.
"When the battle starts I will comfort your restless heart. You'll know that you are home."
Memories of joy when she met her love and the sweetness of their courtship; followed by the first year of sourness as the court subtly made their displeasure of his choice known. The rush of pride as she made herself heard and accepted by all but the most stubborn fairies. All of these memories and moments that brought her to here. Queen of the Meadow Kingdom and waiting for her daughter and heir to be born.
Placing the book back on the shelf Kerria made her way to her bed, cradling her much desired child.
"I can't wait to meet you my sweet little Marianne."
It would not be till the end of the first month of winter that Kerria would finally give birth to her much longed for child. Her screams of pain muffled behind her chamber doors as the head nursemaid assisted with the delivery while the King paced nervously in the next room. With the dying of the sun, the sound of a baby crying filled the room, as the Queen collapsed in relief that her daughter was finally born.
"Well my Queen, it is as I feared, your daughter is pale, dark haired and tiny. Her wings have no color and already she refuses to settle into sleep like a good babe should."
Giving an annoyed look at the grumbling head nursemaid, Kerria gently took her baby into her arms, as her husband burst into the room in a flurry.
"Is she alright? Are they both healthy?"
"Yes, my King. Your Queen is recovering nicely and should be ready to give you more children in a few months time. As for your daughter...while very active I'm afraid I can't say for certain if she will survive the winter. She is far too small compared to a normal fairy babe. I suggest we wait for a few more weeks before making any decisions. "
Slipping onto the bed, Dagda rained kisses onto her forehead as he cradled her and their daughter into his chest.
"Thank you head nursemaid. You are dismissed."
Kerria could only look in wonder as her small daughter squirmed to make herself comfortable in her arms.
"Look at her Dadga, isn't she beautiful?"
Glancing up to catch her husbands eyes, Kerria felt her joy drain a little at the sight of his worried face as he hugged them both closer to his body.
"She is so tiny."
"But fierce. She will be a good and strong Queen for our people."
A small yawn broke their gaze, as they both looked down to see their baby girl stretch one more time before finally falling asleep. Silence filled the room as they both looked down with love at their resting child.
"Why 'Marianne' my love? I thought we agreed on a flower name for our little girl?"
Tucking herself under his chin, Kerria couldn't help but chuckle.
"It is a flower name Dagda. It's the name of my father's favourite flower, which unfortunately doesn't grow here in the Meadow Kingdom."
"You'll have to draw it for me then, so I can see the beauty that captivated you and your father."
Laughing at his antics, Kerria snuggled into his chest as he began to softly hum their song. Finally her daughter was in her arms, while she lay in her husbands arms. The young Queen couldn't be any happier in that moment; let tomorrow's worries be for tomorrow. For that night, Kerria and Dagda slept with their daughter in peace.