Hello everyone!
I wasn't planning on writing a reconciliation fic seeing as there are so many, but Dana (princessgleeky) gave me this prompt and I thought it sounded too good to refuse. Check out her fics btw - they're awesome :)
So, this is for you, Dana, and for anyone else who's anticipating the return of glee on Sunday. Here's to a bright, Finchely future!
Disclaimer: Sadly, Glee isn't mine
"Hudson!"
Finn turns and jogs over to Coach Bieste, who is motioning him over to one of the goals.
"You gonna be able to stay for an extra half-hour to work on some new plays for the game next week?" she asks.
"Sure," he agrees. It's not like he's got anything to do. He's spent every night lying on his bed, trying to drown out his sorrows with loud, obnoxious music, since him and Rachel…
"Sure," he repeats, trying to cut off his train of thought and the accompanying pang of guilt and hurt that rushes through him, almost causing him physical pain. He clenches his eyes tightly, trying to rid his mind of shiny hair and an angelic voice and those deep, deep, brown, soul-searching eyes.
"Hudson?"
Bieste saves him from drowning in his thoughts, pulling him back to the present.
"Yeah, yeah…sure, Coach, it's fine," he answers again.
"Are the whole team staying?" he suddenly asks; a sinking feeling in his stomach as an unwelcome thought arrives.
"Hmm…"
Please say no, please say no, he thinks. She shouldn't be able to stay. She has ballet practise on Tuesdays. Why does he remember this stuff? Why does he care? He shouldn't care. He doesn't care. He doesn't, he doesn't, he doesn't.
"No, just Jones, Cohen-Chang and Berry."
Fuck it.
"Well, I'll see you tomorrow then, Hudson," Bieste says, giving him an approximation of a wave before heading off, leaving Rachel, Tina and Mercedes standing up the other end of the pitch.
Sighing heavily, he heads over to where they're standing, hoping he can get this damn thing over with as quickly as possible.
xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Rachel tries to ignore the anxiety she can feel building as she sees Finn coming down the pitch towards her, Mercedes and Tina.
She tells herself that it's the recent exercise that's making her heart pound and her breathing speed up.
She takes a deep breath, closing her eyes and counting to ten, forcing herself to relax. It's just a football practice.
She opens her eyes and sees Finn standing right next to her and has to resist looking up to his face.
"Okay, I'm just gonna teach you the plays the team's been working on so you get used to it for the game."
She can picture the exact expression he's wearing right now, just from the tone of his voice. He sounds less than enthusiastic and she almost feels angry at him for acting like this is a problem; like she's getting in the way of everything he does. She's giving him space like he asked her to.
Rachel notices Mercedes and Tina looking back and forth between the two of them, like they're waiting for something dramatic to happen. She can't let her personal problems ruin the football team's chances.
"Well, let's get on with the practice then," she says, taking the ball from Finn and putting on her best attempt at a cheery face, ignoring the way her skin almost burns as it brushes against his…
Forty-five minutes later she's sitting on the school steps, having changed out of her football kit, frowning as she listens to the message from her daddy:
"Hey, pumpkin. Your dad and I have got an emergency meeting, so I'm afraid we won't be able to pick you up from school. Can you get a lift home instead? Make yourself some dinner and we'll be back around eleven. Take care, princess, we love you."
The message cuts off and Rachel's left sitting there in front of the school façade, droplets of rain beginning to splash lightly down around her. She picks up her bag and her folder and her eyes scan the empty parking lot as she curses herself for not bringing a coat or an umbrella with her. Deciding she'd better start walking the three miles home before the rain gets even heavier, she sets off towards the gate, her head low against the chilly wind.
xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Finn's just rounding the corner, when he notices a petite figure battling through the pouring rain. Without looking too closely, he slows down and pulls in to offer a lift to the poor soul caught in this weather without an umbrella.
It's only when he gets closer that he recognises the familiar bag and the trademark clothing. He almost pulls away, but his conscience gets the better of him and he reluctantly opens the truck door, pretending to ignore the startled expression on her face.
"Want a lift?" he offers.
She looks at him a little uncertainly before nodding and stepping into the truck, sitting in the passenger seat, just like she used to.
"Thanks," she whispers, fixing her eyes on the road.
"Yeah," He falls silent for a moment.
"You cold?" he asks her.
Her face cracks into a tiny smile.
"A little," she replies.
That tiny smile, combined with her dripping bangs plastered adorably to her forehead, suddenly makes Finn remember all of the other times they'd been in his truck together. All the day trips they'd been on in the summer. All the times they'd made out on the backseat. All the time when he loved her and she loved him and that was all that mattered to both of them.
He turns up the heater, angling it at her to try and dry her clothes and thinks of something safe to say.
"How come you were walking home?" he asks.
"My dads had to go to a meeting."
Silence falls between them again; both of them wanting to break the awkward tension but neither knowing what to say.
"So… it's a bit rainy today," he attempts.
"Yeah, um, how did your science test go?"
"Um… okay. I got a B."
"Wow. Well done."
Well, that worked.
Finn turns on the radio, wincing when he hears Don't Go Breaking My Heart come bursting out of the speakers, the noise filling the car for a second before he flicks it off hastily and stares at the road.
xxxxxxxxxxxxx
By the time they arrive back at Rachel's, her hair is nearly dry and her clothes aren't too wet either. She opens the door, preparing to dash for the shelter of the porch when she feels herself turning to Finn.
"Would you like to come in for a bit?"
Her lips open of their own accord and the words tumble out before she can stop them. She can see the conflict in his eyes and realises she's holding her breath as she waits for an answer.
"Okay."
Before he can change his mind, she smiles at him – the first genuine smile she's smiled since December – and quickly steps out of the truck, rushing to the door to avoid getting soaked again. As she does so, she slips on the doorstep, gasping as she feels Finn's strong arms catch her before she can hit the floor.
"Thank you, Finn," she says, avoiding eye contact with him and turning to open the door.
Rachel invites him up to her room because she's not really sure what else to do.
He hovers uncertainly by the side of the bed. By his side of the bed, where he sat every time he came round. What she would give for those days to come back.
"You can sit down, you know," she tells him, perching on the end of the bed, careful not to touch him.
She can feel the tension building between them and looks out of the window at the drizzle, feeling awkward as she senses his eyes on the back of her head.
"You kept it then?"
Her stomach sinks as she realises what he's talking about. She turns round and sees him pulling the 'Finn' necklace off her bedside table, running it through his fingers carefully.
"I couldn't – I – I wasn't going to – I guess I just didn't want to…throw it away," she falters, ending lamely, her voice unusually quiet.
"Yeah, me neither."
If she hadn't just seen his lips move, Rachel would have sworn she was imagining what Finn said. She would have found it amusing at the fact that they were talking in metaphors about their relationship, but laughing was the last thing she felt like doing when his cinnamon eyes were looking at her in sorrow, making her heart twinge painfully.
"Why did you do it, Rach?" he asks her quietly, shifting his eyes to her comforter. She sits down beside him, tears pooling in her eyes as she realises just how broken he is. He's just as broken as her. And they're the only ones who can fix each other.
xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Finn listens intently, keeping his eyes on the comforter as Rachel pours out her soul to him.
"I'm so sorry Finn," Rachel whispers.
He has to look up then, despite his better judgement, and when he does she looks absolutely beautiful. Her eyes are swollen and glistening, there are salty tracks streaking her blotchy face and her lips are quivering with the effort at holding back her emotion.
His heart begins to thud painfully fast, aching with the sorrow that consumes him and that he knows consumes her too. He needs to feel her close to him.
"Can I… kiss you?" he blurts out.
Within a second, her lips have captured his and, by pure instinct, his lips respond by molding to the familiar shape. Hot tears spill past his closed eyelashes, melding with hers as his hands tenderly reach for the back of her head.
He pulls her towards him and slips his tongue into her mouth out of habit, almost choking as he gasps at the contact. He's missed her so much.
And, God, he just needs her now.
Finn lays Rachel her down against her soft pillows and begins to smash his lips against hers more roughly. He can feel her reacting by meeting his increase in aggression, pulling at his hair slightly.
Her hand is suddenly moving down his body and he takes this as a sign to continue, moving his hands to touch her boobs as a distraction from her fingers which are getting dangerously close to his hard-on.
Then he just has to think of the mailman because she begins to unzip his jeans, pulling at his belt buckle.
He can barely control himself as he lets his hands slip under her shirt and begin fondling her breasts.
She squirms and moves her hands up to his torso, beginning to lift up his shirt so her hands can roam all over his back.
"Finn?" she says, "I'm ready."
Her voice sounds slightly raspier than usual and he can't deny that it really turns him on. So he just nods and begins to pull off her shirt, kissing her passionately all the while.
xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Rachel certainly never expected this turn of events, but it doesn't stop her from enjoying them all the same. She can feel the unspoken love between them, even through her lusty haze.
That's why she doesn't hesitate to pull Finn's jeans off him, shedding his shirt quickly after to give her hands more and more skin to feel. She runs her hands up and down his chest, then moves them to his back.
When she feels his hands attempting and failing to undo her bra, she rolls them over, so that she's on top and then sits up, blushing a little as she feels his erection underneath her.
She undoes the bra strap herself and then quickly gets off him, rushing over to her chest of drawers and rummaging through them until she finds the box of condoms she bought just before Christmas. Thank goodness she's prepared for any situation.
Rachel hurries back to the bed and resumes licking up and down Finn's neck, her hands stroking him through his boxers and causing him to groan.
She feels his hands reach up and arches her hips, forcing her naked breasts into his hands and releasing a loud groan as he moves his mouth to one of them and begins to suck.
Wanton moans escape both of their lips as Rachel pulls off Finn's boxers, and grasps his erection, sliding the condom smoothly onto it.
She looks up at his face for a second and sees his questioning eyes seeking hers.
She nods and moves herself over him, helping him to remove her panties at the same time.
When he pushes into her she suddenly feels a sharp pain, followed by complete and utter ecstasy.
He begins to thrust in and out of her a little tentatively, so she forces herself onto him, making him pick up the pace.
xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Finn's mouth forms an 'o' shape as he cries Rachel's name and explodes into the condom, feeling her walls pulse around him, her fingernails digging into his shoulders as she comes too, yelling even louder than he does.
They lay there for a while, panting heavily, their chests heaving as they both come down from their orgasms.
He feels her soft hair against his chest as she lays down on him, both of them completely spent.
"Princess? We're home!"
Shit. Shit. Shit.
What are her dads doing home this early? He flings himself off the bed, dashing to grab his clothes and sees Rachel's look of horror mirroring his own.
Finn's pretty sure he's never dressed so quickly in his life, as he sprints across Rachel's room and looks back at her for a second before scrambling out of her window and down the conveniently placed apple tree next to it.
He's halfway home before he stops running, doubling over as he tries to regain his breath. It's then that it hits him what exactly he's done.
He's just had sex with his ex-girlfriend. Because she's Rachel. And he loves her. But he shouldn't have done it.
Suddenly, all of the guilt and hurt comes crashing back, almost knocking him to the ground.
xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Rachel Berry grins to herself as she walks through the sunny parking lot and through the school to her locker.
Every time she thinks of the night before, a huge grin spreads across her face as she remembers how loved she felt.
Finn loves her. Finn loves her. He loves her.
She's so happy she could sing. (Not that she wouldn't sing even if she weren't happy).
She opens her locker door, searching through it until she finds the pink piece of paper at the back with '4 ever' written on it and sticks it back up in its rightful place below the 'Finn' on the inside of the door.
Looking down at her neck, which proudly bears his name again and then back up to the door, her grin grows even wider.
She doesn't stop smiling all through first period when Santana insults her clothing choice. She doesn't stop smiling all through second or third period when nobody wants to be her partner.
It's not until lunch time when she realises that Finn's avoiding her and that thought instantly makes her stop smiling.
She has to search the entire school twice before she finds him walking down the hall, a deep frown on his face.
She runs up to him before he can turn around and go the other way.
"Finn Hudson. Why are you avoiding me?" she jumps straight in, hands on her hips to show she means business.
"Last night was a mistake, Rachel," he tells her, the words cutting her newly-repaired heart into pieces again.
Her arms drop to her sides and she looks down.
"A mistake?"
"Look, I'm hurt. I'm fucking hurt. It really got to me what you did with Puck and I know you say you didn't mean it but you meant to hurt me and you did. You got what you wanted, okay?"
Anger flares up in her then and she draws herself up to her full height (and still only comes up to his shoulders).
"No, it's not okay Finn. What about me? Do you think it didn't hurt me when you kissed me and ran away? When you used my feelings for you to get me to return to Glee Club? When you broke up with me to find your inner rockstar? When Santana humiliated me in front of the whole club? When you called her super hot? When you looked at her like that down the hallway? Do you think it didn't hurt when you never once stood up for me, even when I was your girlfriend? Because it did, Finn. I was wrong to kiss Noah, but you were to blame too, so don't go piling all the blame on me because I already feel guilty enough as it is!" she yells, not caring who hears, her speech gaining momentum and her voice gaining volume as she lists each thing he's done.
She sees him recoil then, the guilt plain on his face, and her anger ebbs away a little.
"I'm sorry, Rach." All of the fight has gone out of him now and she can see the man who she will never stop loving, peeking out again.
"I'm sorry I'm not good enough for you," he says, looking at his feet.
"What?"
"I'm sorry, Rach," he repeats.
"Me too, Finn."
Suddenly, just like that, in an instant the pain is gone and all that's left is a desire to show Finn how much she loves him.
"You're more than good enough for me. You're perfect for me," she says honestly.
"Friends?" he asks, tentatively, holding out his hand.
"Best friends," she confirms, taking it and looking up at him.
xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Finn realises as he walks out of school, hand in hand with Rachel that he's not angry anymore. He's still a little hurt but it'll heal because there's nothing they can't handle together.
They might have hurt each other, but he knows without a doubt that they can overcome it because she loves him and he might be well on his way back to loving her.
So he holds her hand tight all the way home, hoping he'll never have to let it go again because he's Finn Hudson and she's Rachel Berry and together they can conquer anything.
What did you think?
I'm aware that this is the third fic in which I've written about their first time together, so please tell me if I'm being too repetitive or if you have any plot-bunnies for me :D
Thank you for reading - please drop me a review. I'd love to hear what you think!