Love's To Blame
By Krisdaughter of Athena
I'd like to dedicate this to my sister Kyllie and all the other RenePaige (or Beige or Peck or BeckxPaige) shippers. But mainly my sister because she's a hardcore RenePaige shipper.
It's sad, just warning you.
The song is Love's to Blame by For King and Country.
I am not an Australian band or Walt Disney Studios so I own NOTHING!
Italics- thoughts/flashbacks
Bold-Lyrics
Underline- Grid speaking
"The fight has been taken to CLU and we need to formulate the next step Beck? Are you alright?"
Beck looks up as Tron looks away from the screen where a diagram of the throne ship sits.
"I'm fine. Continue."
Tron looks at Beck disbelievingly, "What's wrong?"
Beck frowns and looks down.
Time and time
I've thought through it all, how we loved and laughed
And how we fought each other, pushing one another
To be somebody else
"Beck?"
"It's…Paige."
Tron stops what he is doing and Beck looks to him to see a tight frown on his face.
He knows that it's been four months since Paige and I got togther…I think that….
"Continue."
"I'm afriad ...I mean she's a commander in Tesler's army. What if something happens to one of us and she_"
"Beck."
He looks to Tron.
"It might be time to stop this. It sounds like things are getting too risky with both your identity and both of yours saftey."
Beck folds his hands and puts them under his chin, lost in thought.
Should I do this?
I mean…I don't want her to get hurt.
But…what if I hurt her now?
And time and time
I've wrestled my thoughts, uncertain if the end was right or wrong
And whether we still should be together
Or with somebody else
Beck shakes his head.
I have to. It's the only way.
Beck stands and walks away, head bowed.
Tron doesn't stop him. He knows what Beck is doing.
It's the right thing to do.
….
Paige walks into the club where Beck is waiting for her, a smile gracing her face.
Four months, the happiest I've been.
Beck is waiting for her at the pool table they always kept for themselves.
"Beck!"
He looks to her, and her arms drape around his neck. She pulls him closer but he gently puts his hands on her shoulders.
"Paige…"
His voice is gentle, yet sad.
She looks to him, "Beck? What's wrong?"
His eyes are pleading, "I-I'm sorry."
Paige's eyes widen, "W-What do you mean?"
"We…um, we can't be together…anymore."
She gasps and she feels pressure build near her eyes.
"Beck…are you sure?"
She looks into his eyes, conflicting emotions lurking in the darkness of the brown. He nods, the emotions only partly disappearing from view.
She pulls away and runs off, refusing to look back and let Beck_ or anyone_ see the tears unwillingly falling down her face.
Beck looks down as his lights dim and his shoulders slump.
What if…this wasn't right?
Immediately, he wants to run after her, hold her close, tell her what he said was just a bad dream.
But he can't.
It's too late.
She probably hates me now more than ever
Our last memory
She had water in her eyes
She cried, stay with me
And asked how can this be love if you're leaving me
But darling love's to blame
He controls himself and walks slowly back to the Garage.
But at least I won't be able to hurt her.
As Beck walks home slowly, Paige sits in her closet on Tesler's ship, away from everyone as she cries.
Why am I crying?
She doesn't know the anwser to her own question as she continues until there is nothing left.
And I can't see you right now
'Cause I just can't fake it
Can't be near you right now
'Cause I know you're no longer mine
I can't see you
….
"Beck? Are you in there?"
He says nothing in response to Mara, his head buried in his pillow.
"Beck!"
He ignores Zed and continues to stare numbly at the floor just over his pillow.
Why? Why did I do that?
"Hey Zed." He says quietly as he hears the said program walking in.
"Beck, your shift is about to start!"
My job…
"Okay."
He gets out of bed and walks quietly towards the door when Mara opens it.
"Guys! I…Beck? Are you alright?"
He shakes his head, "Never better."
He makes his way past her before she can get any ideas of confronting him.
I'm not ready for that.
A dull ache carries steadly in his chest as he opens his locker for his wrench.
It makes me ache that we had to break
That even though I knew your heart so well
We're strangers, in different places
Though we live a mile apart
When he enters the Garage, people look up to him as he walks over to an empty bike. He feels his mental confindence crawl back into it's shell.
Why are they looking at me?
Why are they whispering?
He tries to ignore them as he leans in front of a bike and sets to work.
….
"Commander Paige…."
There is a far away knock and Paige opens her eyes, not remembering dozing off. Sighing, she opens the closet door before walking over and opening the front door.
A soldier stands there, silently stunned that he came across Paige in her state.
"What is it?"
He shakes his head then speaks.
"Um…you're wanted in the bridge."
She nods before closing the door again, "I'll be right there."
She walks over to her mirror and examines herself. Tearstains are visible on her face and her eyes are slightly red.
Oh gosh….I talked to that soldier like this!
She feels the pressure again, as she remembers why she had been crying the night before.
Beck…
My best friend's gone
My world has been torn
Won't ever share a name never be one
But I will always remember the years we spent in love
She shakes her head, no more crying.
She washes off her face and heads to the bridge, the depressing thoughts only staying in her mind.
….
"Hey Beck!"
He turns as Link catches up with him before he gets on the elevator.
Silence is first as they ride up the elevator.
As they reach the top, Link asks, "Is it true you dated and broke up with Commander Paige?"
Beck sighs and rolls his eyes before he walks out of the elevator, leaving a stunned Link behind.
Beck goes into his room, trying to avoid everyone and leave quietly.
Wait…Tron's disc is in my locker.
SLAM!
He pulls off his disc and spins around to see Zed and Mara are leaning against the wall, eyes on fire.
He puts back his disc as he waves sheepishly, "Hi guys."
Zed continues to glare at him while Mara speaks up.
"We have couple questions we want anwsered. Now."
"That's great, but I have somewhere to be so…"
He tries to walk past her but she unexpectedly grabs his arm and twists it behind him, much faster than he thought.
He lets out a wince and adds the uncomfort in his list of pain from the past cycle. She pushes him towards his bed. He stumbles before turning back to face his friends.
"So tell us Beck," she comes up and pokes him in the chest, "did you really have a girlfriend? Without telling us?!"
He winces at her words and looks down, "Yes."
Zed looks to him, "Who?"
Beck looks to both of them in slight anger, "Well take a guess, since the whole Grid seems to know my love life!"
Zed and Mara's eyes widen as they exchange a glance.
"…..Commander Paige?"
Beck sighs and nods.
"You're dating an Occupation soldier?! Beck_"
Beck turns away and Mara's eyes harden. Zed notices and before he can react, Mara stands in front of Beck with her hand out as Beck's head snaps away. Beck looks back up, cheek already turning red, eyes a tightly controlled anger.
"I understand that! I understand that she's a soldier and that we rebelled against the Occupation! You know what else? I had to break her heart because I'm her worst enemy, the one that if I get caught, I could hurt her! I already lost too much, and I'm not ready to lose anyone else! I ALREADY LOST BODHI, ABEL, AND I'VE BROKEN EVERYONE'S TRUST! I ALMOST LOST MY CLOSEST FRIEND RIGHT NOW AND I'VE LOST MY INNOCENCE! I DON'T WANT TO LOSE ANYMORE! THAT'S WHY I HAD TO!"
Mara steps back, eyes wide with tears and shock. Zed grabs her shoulder, stunned as well.
Beck's eyes flash and he sits on his bed, putting his head in his hands, eyes clenched shut.
After a moment, he looks up to see their expressions say all.
Beck is ….The Renegade
He stands and walks past them, slamming the door behind him.
He grabs a bag and puts everything from his locker in it. He grabs the cover and hides it behind his bag.
He hears his door open, "Wait!"
He disobeys and begins to run. He hears footsteps follow him. He looks up to see Link is walking towards him, not looking.
They collide and his bag and cover crash to the floor.
"Beck! Are you…"
Link stops though, when he sees Beck's things on the floor, including the disc. His eyes widen.
Crap.
Beck scoops his things up and runs past him, his breath coming out rapidly.
"Beck wait!" He hears Mara call.
He ignores them.
They just want to find more.
"Beck!" He hears Link call, and he turns back to see him join Zed and Mara.
Beck turns around the corner and comes to a window. Quickly, he connects the cover to his back and slips on the bag before opening the window. His suit turns white and he pulls out a baton as he steps onto the sill.
"Beck!"
He turns to see Zed and Mara. He hears her gasp but doesn't stop as he jumps out the window and opens his baton to a jet. He zooms through the sky as the program behind the manifesto of the suit feels his heart break as he leaves everthing he loves behind.
….
Later, Paige finds herself looking over the city, finding the peace clearing.
She's hugging her knees as she watches the lights glow from her spot on the bridge top.
The exact bridge top_she remembers,_ where Beck and I often went.
She closes her eyes.
"Paige."
She looks up to Beck, his smile iluminating his eyes.
"I got something for you," she says, holding the gift behind her back as they sit on the bridge top.
"Yeah?"
"Yes. But first, you have to close your eyes."
She sees him smirk but he obeys as his eyes shut.
"No peeking." She calls teasingly, pulling the box out from behind her back.
"Aw…you're no fun." He says sarcastically but his eyes don't open.
She laughs softly as she opens the box and slips something on his fourth finger.
After a few moments, he opens his eyes to see the light blue ring on his hand.
"Wow…" He looks at it in shock.
"Do you not like it?"
"I do. Just don't know how I'm going to outbeat you."
She laughs, "No need."
"No matter. Your turn."
She closes her eyes as she hears him shuffling with something. She feels something go around her neck.
"Ok you can open."
She opens her eyes and looks down to see a stone made of blue, orange, and green, the rest a silver chain.
"Oh Beck…"
"I know it's not a ring or anything," he says awkwardly, "I kinda made it. Sorry it doesn't_"
"I love it."
He looks to her, "You do?"
She fingers it before tackling him in a hug. "I do."
She looks to the sky as her tumb strokes the stone.
It was special to me, then.
What is it to me now?
She looks to the Outlands in the distance.
Has he moved on?
What is he now?
Meanwhile, her glance is being returned as Beck stares out the window at the city, his hand lightly pressed against the glass.
I still think of you
I pray that you are safe
I'm still missing you
But it has to be this way, 'cause I'm not right for you
And that's why loves to blame
"Beck?"
He turns to see Tron, who barely looks up from the tablet he's holding.
"I'm guessing it didn't go well."
"It was terrible."
"Is she the one that slapped you?"
Beck touches his cheek as he stills feel the heat coming off of him.
"No, she ran away when I told her."
"Then who?"
"Mara. She found out that I had been dating an Occupation soldier. And then I…"
He looks down at the bag he's holding, biting his lip in apprehension.
Tron seems to understand, "They found out."
Beck nods, "I ran away before it sank in and they called the Occupation."
Tron's hand goes to his apprentice's shoulder.
"They might not, from what we've seen."
Beck nods.
"And as for Paige…time will heal."
Beck looks up, "Thanks."
"Now head back! I believe you have some friends to explain to."
Beck nods and leaves.
…...
Paige is walking through the city when she hears someone crying.
She looks up to see a girl from the nearby Garage is standing near the entrance, crying as a male holds her.
She mentally winces, as they remind her of her and Beck on cycles they would shelter against the cold….
She shakes her head, Do your job.
"What's the problem, programs?"
The girl looks up to me, seemingly trying to ignore my face.
"M-My friend. H-He had broken up with his girlfriend earlier and we got in a fight and_" she shivers, "he snapped. He ran away and I think he…"
My eyes widen and I put my hand on her shoulder.
"I'm sorry. Do you want me to go look for him?"
"Look for who?"
I feel myself tense slightly.
It's him.
"Beck!" The girl cries before running over to the program and grabbing him around the waist.
He jumps slightly, his shock obvious even with his unseen face.
"Oh my gosh, Beck! You had Zed and I worried! What were you thinking? We thought you had gone to…"
She stops and begins to cry, holding him close.
Quietly, he puts the bag he's holding on the ground and holds her.
"I'm fine Mara. Just needed to think for a moment."
She sobs, "Don't do that again."
He shakes his head, "Don't worry, it won't happen again_"
He looks up to see me and I see his weary face.
He shakes his head and he visibly swallows, "Paige."
His friends look up as I cross my arms.
Mara pulls out of his arms and awkwardly picks up his bag.
"Beck."
I see him look around as he fiddles with a blue band on his finger.
He hasn't taken it off…
Beck looks down as he notices. His mind filters through why she would be near his friends.
Why is she here?
Zed and Mara notice the awkward air and look to each other.
Beck nods, "Good to see you."
He sees her turn the necklace charm in her hand.
She hasn't moved on either…
He feels part of himself want to run to her and ask her to forgive him and let him become a part of her world again.
And I can't see you right now
'Cause I just can't fake it
Can't be near you right now
'Cause I know you're no longer mine
I can't see you
He quickly quiets that part of him as he nods to her before forcing himself inside.
….
Many Cycles Later….
Beck jumps from roof to roof until he lands on the blue-nullifying orange ship. He looks around, searching eyes hidden behind his mask.
Next step: infiltrate CLU's throneship
He opens the hatch he made and lands quietly inside. He knocks away the guards that notice him and continues through the shadows, surprisingly well for his white suit.
Finally: Get the intel needed.
He follows the directions he memorized earlier until he finds himself at a small door. He opens it and a cube sits inside. He smirks underneath his mask and quickly grabs it.
Immediately, alarms go off.
Alert! Information compromised. All guards to corrupt this lapse.
Great, I'm a lapse.
Beck grits his teeth and begins to run.
By the time he's to the bridge, a trail of soldiers lies behind him, groaning and unconcious.
"Halt!"
He turns to see Dyson run at him. Beck turns and winces as he feels something graze his skin.
Crap!
He hears Dyson run towards him and he grabs the soldier's arm and flips him over. Dyson's head thuds against the ground and a pain shoots through Beck's side. His hand flies there and he feels the gash, about as long as his forearm.
Gritting his teeth, he fumbles for his baton as he begins to run. He feels a force knock him over and he's suddenly looking into furious, brown eyes and he sees the edge of an orange disc against his neck.
No…
….
Paige is ticked.
Beyond ticked.
"What do you mean he's lying? I can trust him."
Pavel looks to her in a cold way.
"I had been looking through his disc and I saw what really happened."
"Why would you be looking through his disc?"
He looks down as he wrings his hands in a fake uncomfortableness.
"Tesler's dead."
What?
He sees the stunned look on her face and hands an orange disc to her.
"See for yourself."
Carefully, she takes the disc from him and opens it to a familiar setting.
Her eyes widen as she watches the memory.
She doesn't need to ask; something inside her says it's true.
She clenches the disc as anger comes upon her.
"I know how you must feel, we've all been betrayed_"
She turns and leaves, taking all her control not to derezz her co-worker.
She had seen more than he thought.
Pavel had killed Tesler!
Alert! Information compromised. All guards to corrupt this lapse.
She looks up.
The Renegade.
Another traitor.
She drops Tesler's disc and runs off, following the other soldiers that soon lay on the ground.
When she comes to the bridge, she sees a disc rush past the Renegade. Dyson retrives his disc and charges at him. The Renegade flips him over, but clutches his side as Dyson hits the ground. He gasps slightly before he fumbles with something on his waist.
She shakes her head free of a medic's feelings, he's getting away!
She collides into him and he grunts as he falls. She flips him over and holds her disc close to his neck.
"You're going to pay for what you've done." She snarls as she raises her disc.
He doesn't fight back, but winces as his hands clench into fists under her legs. She sees a flash of blue and freezes in her tracks.
Was that…
A ring? A blue ring?
….
Beck tenses and winces as his fists clench.
Paige stops in mid-rise as she looks to his hands.
Suddenly, she pulls up his hand and looks at his knuckles.
What's so important about my fist?
He looks to his fist and sees the ring.
Crap…
She notices it and pulls it off to examine it.
Maybe time will heal our hearts
Her eyes turned shocked and she drops her disc. She backs up and Beck sees the anger and hurt on her face.
And maybe after time you'll understand
"B-Beck? Is that you?"
I said goodbye but I love you.
Beck nods but winces again. He lifts his head and looks to see his gash grow longer.
Paige looks to where his head is turned to see a large gash grow along his side.
"Finish him!"
She turns to see Dyson stand, a victorious smirk on his face.
She looks back to Beck, who is visibly trembling in pain as he pants. She looks to Dyson.
SMACK!
She kicks Dyson back in the head and he falls to the ground, a knot already appearing on his head.
She places the ring on her hand and picks up her disc. She pulls Beck to his feet and helps him to a helicopter nearby.
"Halt defect!"
Defect…
She turns and sees more soldiers coming. Grunting, she sets Beck on the floor before starting the helicopter. He groans slightly as his vision begins to fade.
She glances back, but doesn't say anything as she pulls the chopper into the sky. She sighs but looks up to see the bay begin to closing. She pushes against the accelration and grits her teeth as she hears Beck thud against the back of the chopper.
Come on, come on…
The chopper leaves the area as the bay shuts down.
Yes!
She grins in spite of herself and flies towards the Outlands, unwillingly thinking of some advice Beck had once given.
We should head for the Outlands. It's our only chance.
Her grin disappears when she hears gunfire. She glances back to see a jet following her. She turns the chopper and the jet catches up with her. She turns and feels anger rise as she sees her oppenent.
Pavel
"So long Paige!" He calls as he turns in front of her, leaving a long light line.
She gasps and jumps up. She grabs a parachute and slings it over her shoudlers. She grabs Beck and jumps out as the chopper crashes and explodes.
The wind roars in her ears as she struggles to hold Beck and grapple for the parachute cord. She feels it and pulls. The parachute jerks back and her descent slows.
Her footing fails and she falls to the ground, her legs crumpling. She hits the ground with a THUD.
For a moment, she's still against the cold snow. Her hands go up to her face and she feels her ice-cold skin and damp hair. She laughs in relief slightly.
I'm alive!
She hears a panting and she freezes.
Beck!
She jumps to her feet to see him lying on the ground a couple feet away.
She notices a cave not far past him. She runs over to him and picks him up by the armpits. Grunting, she drags him back into the cave and sets him down on the stone floor. She examines him before taking off his disc.
"Stay with me." She whispers as she begins to work.
You owe me some anwsers.
…
Beck jerks up with a gasp.
"Cyrus…what…"
His breathing slows when he finds himself staring at a stone wall.
Where…am I?
He looks to his side where a scar no longer is seen.
Am I dead?
His hand goes up to his hair and he numbly realizes that he's still wearing the cover, but his mask is off.
"Huh."
"I healed you."
Beck jumps and his eyes search for the source. His eyes come to a figure near the cave entrance, her lines still orange.
"I couldn't heal all of you, though," Paige continues, "your wrists are permanently damaged."
He looks down to his wrists.
"…It's okay."
She turns and seems to glare at him.
He looks down.
"I thought you would hate me when you found out."
"I do."
"Then…why am I alive?"
She stands and walks over to him.
"Because," she sits down on a rock next to him, "I want anwsers."
"Why didn't you just search my disc?"
"Fake memories can be implanted on a disc, not in a testimony though."
He looks down, "Right."
She laces her fingers together and looks at him, "I guess I should start from the beginning. Why were you so insitent to not let me die in the tunnels?"
He looks to her, "Because I didn't want someone with so much potential to die so easily."
"Flattery is not going to work here."
"I wasn't out to flatter."
She looks at him, "Why did you leave me when I was dangling on the island?"
"I didn't. I had started the boat and was coming after you when the Occupation got to you first."
"Why did you want to see me suffer?"
He looks at her in confusion, "When did I do that?"
She pulls out her disc, and shows him a memory of a memory.
It's the Renegade, talking to a man Beck doesn't recognize.
"Make sure she looks guilty."
He leans forward, "I'll enjoy watching Paige suffer."
She closes her disc to see Beck staring at the same spot in shock.
"…I think that was a fake memory."
"Why?"
"I never said that and who was that guy?"
He looks to her in questioning.
She sighs, "No one improtant. Who's Cyrus?"
He stiffens and looks to Paige. She immediatley sees the pain in his eyes.
He looks down as he touches his wrists, "He's crazy. He gave me these scars…and he framed me for program's deaths."
She looks to him incrediculously.
"It's the truth."
She cocks an eyebrow, "I know. I can tell the truth from lies in most people."
"Glad to know I fit in with 'most people'."
She ignores his comment, "If you were going to break up with me, then why did you flirt with me?"
He looks down before getting to his feet.
He turns his back to her as he grips his arms and remembers the past and what had happened.
And I can't see you right now
'Cause I just can't fake it
Can't be near you right now
'Cause I know you're no longer mine
"Beck."
He doesn't anwser.
"Beck!"
She stalks up to him, "WHY?"
"I DON'T KNOW!" He says, turning.
"LIAR! I WANT THE TRUTH NOW! WHY DID YOU_"
"BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!" He screams.
Paige stops in her steps, eyes wide.
He looks down.
"I had always liked you. But when we started dating…it became more than liking. But I'm the Renegade, and the Revolution was growing dangerous. So in case anything happened…I broke up with you, so you would be okay. Seems I still managed to hurt you."
"What do you mean?"
"I made you defect from the army. They'll be looking to kill you now!"
"Beck…"
She's silent for a moment as she tries to straighten her thoughts.
And I can't see you right now
'Cause my heart just can't take it
Can't be near you right now
'Cause I know you're no longer mine…
She shakes her head, "I already was defecting. Tesler had lied about my past to me and my co-worker had killed him before I could figure it out. I know now that CLU and his army is made of killers and liars, something I no longer want to be a part of."
He looks to her, "So…you're not going to kill me for CLU?"
She shakes her head, "No. I don't know what to do now."
"You could always join me."
I can't see you
She looks to him, "I don't think I can…"
Beck takes her hands, "Yes, you can. You're stronger than anyone I know. I know you can."
I can't see you
She nods, "Okay."
He nods, "Let's go then."
"Wait!"
He looks back to her.
She takes his hand and places a ring on his finger.
"This is yours."
I just can't see you
Right now
He smiles lightly, "Thank you."
She nods.
He stands and helps her up, "Come on! I've got a lot to show you! Oh and…."
Paige leans forward and kisses him on the lips and he stops, stunned. When she pulls back, he smiles.
"Welcome to the Revolution."
And love's to blame
Fin.
Okay so I probably spent close to a total of 48 hours on this piece. So, I feel like barfing lyrics and rainbows. So I'm going to sleep now. Hope you enjoyed and please review to tell me what you think. That's how I withstand exhaustion and the urges to barf music and rainbows.