Title: What it Took

Summary: What did it take for Elizabeth and John to realise their true feelings? Lots of obstacles in their way of course.

Paring: ShWeir!

Season: Future - maybe season 3 or even 4

Spoilers: None in this chapter I'm pretty sure. Perhaps later on anything up to Allies.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. It's sad I know. And I am gettin no money whatsoever for this. I just had to get the idea out of my head and so decided totype it out whileI was meant to be studying.

Not Betaed So sorry for all mistakes.

Elizabeth was awoken by a crash, of something being knocked over next to her. She turned to see John Sheppard quickly picking up her alarm clock and pretending nothing had happened.

"Hey."

His head shot up to see her lying in the same position she had been in when he got up, but now her eyes were open and staring at him.

"Uh, hi. Sorry I knocked your clock over, I was looking for something."

"Oh? And what was that?" She lifted her head up and held it up with her left arm, not breaking eye contact for a moment.

"Em…well…my underwear."

Elizabeth smirked at the obviously embarrassed Colonel. "Any luck?"

Realising she was teasing him, he flashed her a grin, "Yes, actually."

"Good. So where are you going at…" She glanced at the clock, "3.42 in the morning?"

"Well, I thought I'd leave now, so no one saw me coming out of your room in the morning."

"Oh, right yeah, course."

Elizabeth felt her heart drop. She desperately wanted to end all the sneaking around, all the secret glances and silent conversations in public. More than anything she just wanted to be able to do little gestures to show her affection - hold his hand in the control room or embrace him when he returned home safely. But they had both agreed when they started sleeping together that it should remain behind closed doors for as long as possible. But it was becoming harder and harder to do.

It had started out as getting to know each other better, and then it was just some fun, but now? Did he not realise that whatever it was they had was developing into something more?

John moved over to her and sat on the bed. He smiled at her and brushed back the unruly curls covering her face.

"Can't have the whole base knowing I'm messing around with the expedition leader now can I?"

He had meant it as a joke. Meant it to be his reason for leaving. But she interpreted it wrong.

"Is that all this is to you?"

"What'd ya mean Liz?" He moved closer towards her, but she pulled back and got up, dragging the covers around her.

"What I mean is what I said. Is that all this is to you? Sleeping with your boss? Is it just some sort of accomplishment to you – all fun and games?" She felt the fury burning up inside of her.

"What are you talking about?"

She looked at him, anger co-existing with hurt. "John just go."

He began to protest but she just looked at him and he gave in, turned and left.

Elizabeth sat back on her bed and went over the conversation in her mind. He said we were mucking around. That's all. Not 'in a relationship with' or even 'sleeping with', but 'mucking around'.

She was angry, angry at allowing herself to feel more for him. Everyone knew he was a "love 'em and leave 'em" kind of guy, but had that stopped her? She was usually so rational and always thought things through, but with John Sheppard, she was Elizabeth, not Dr Weir the diplomat.

She avoided him for the remainder of the day, which wasn't hard as Rodney had him testing out some new ancient device, and she was swamped under paperwork. Around lunch she saw him start towards her office, but pause, and turn around. She released a breath she hadn't even realised she had been holding, relief at not having to deal with him in such a public place.

The sun had long since set by the time Elizabeth had finished her work. Those on the graveyard shift were sitting drinking coffee and chatting away. She needed to get out, and so headed straight for the door and out onto the balcony, and didn't stop until she was leaning against the railing. She closed her eyes and listened to the wind swirling around her, enjoying the gentle breeze.

"I thought you might come out here." The voice startled her and she spun around to see John sitting leaning against the wall. He got up and approached her.

"I… I just came out to think something over."

"Well I need to talk to you."

"I really don't want to talk John."

"To me? Is that it, you don't want to talk to me? Because you've done a great job of it all day." He was getting more and more frustrated. What was going on with her?

"You're right." Her answer had surprised him. He had expected her to make up some excuse then return to her paper work.

"I don't want to speak with you right now."

"Why! What did I do? Why wont you talk to me Liz?"

The pain inside her was growing. How could she tell him that she wanted to end their relationship now, before she fell completely for him? She didn't want to suffer any more, she had enjoyed it while it lasted, but she had been foolish to think that John Sheppard would ever feel more than lust for her.

She turned and headed to the door, but paused and turned to John.

He could see her eyes watering and realisation dawned on him. "It's over isn't it?"

She hung her head and whispered, "I think so John."