A Reason to Change During the annual ball held to celebrate peace, Heero shows up to protect Relena. But despite his best efforts, Relena was hurt, and when she wakes up in the hospital, she is like a completely different person. Will the old Relena ever come back? And does she have a reason to? Maybe Heero can give her one...
Previously posted under penname "Evanjaleene"; lost the password and email account and is being reposted under new name.
Chapter One: The Evening before the Outbreak
Relena and her companion sat down to a late tea break. "Thank you," she said as the slim man across the table handed her the cream.
"No prob, Miss D."
Relena smiled. Alex was as informal as they came, not like the others who worked with and around her. But it was comforting rather than insulting, to be around someone who wasn't so stiff and proper.
Folding the napkin over her lap, Relena watched as Alex pulled his chair closer to the table and helped himself to the food. He was Mrs. Rykoshkei's greatest cause of grief. She had gotten him to remember to pull out chairs and hold open doors for ladies, but he was by no means the "perfectly gentlemanly gentleman" she hoped for in her nephew, who was living with her because of his parent's untimely deaths.
"So they stuck you with one of those dances? You know, where they blah blah at you and dance like wooden dummies?" Alex glanced up from his chicken for a second.
"Yes. And what's worse than the boring conversations is the fact that almost none who goes to these things can dance at all." Relena wrinkled her nose and frowned down at her plate. Alex, however, was laughing.
Brushing back his blonde-tipped hair, he sighed in mock-sadness. "Oh yes, Miss Relena, 'tis such a pity. Poor lass, you'll be lucky if you still have toes by this time tomorrow. So sad--" here he broke off laughing unashamedly.
"Yeah, they'll be so stepped on I'll have to wear big flat duck shoes for my poor feet!" Relena couldn't help laughing with him as a servant came striding up in the usual stiff-legged manner. He had a message for "young master Alex", who scowled when he read it.
"What?"
"Seems the Young Master will have to be off to attend the reading of his great-aunt Annie's will, even though that wasn't scheduled until tomorrow. My great-uncle has to fly away on business and wants this whole mess sorted out now. Meaning, my fun is now over. Humph. Anyway," Alex smiled faintly at her, attempting to relax, "I'll see you later, Miss D."
"Bye Alex thanks for stopping by," came her warm farewell with a matching good-bye smile. He almost melted.
Privately, Alex had a tad bit of a crush on her, but never said anything. 'Sure, after all,' Alex thought, 'she's only four years older than me, and the vice-foreign minister. I must seem like such a little kid to her.'
Alex sighed as he left Relena's large estate, his dark green eyes dimming some. 'She'll never look at me that way. Not like him.'
Anger darkened the young man's face as he stepped into his car and gunned it down the driveway.
Watching him speed away, Relena sighed to herself. He was a relief from the usual social hu-rah she had to deal with at her meetings. But he always looked like he wanted to tell her something, something important, but just couldn't bring himself to do it.
'Like, You look as pale as a ghost, or, man, you look like an exhausted zombie in need of some sun?'
Relena smiled wryly at her thoughts. She left the tea and finger-foods on the delicate glass-topped table in her public garden, deciding to visit her private garden now.
"I need a break. I need some sleep." She thought a moment. "I need a tan," she added to the list. She stopped and gazed up at the sky. "I need a life outside peacekeeping. This just isn't cutting it anymore," she murmured.
Glancing around, Relena flung herself down on the grass and stared into the endless stretch of blue.
The roses were all white in her personal garden, and were all blooming. She could see them--
Relena frowned. No, she couldn't. Someone's jean-clad legs were blocking her view. Who dared bother her here? "Excuse me, but--Heero?" Relena cut herself off with a gasp. Then inwardly she cringed. Why couldn't she ever say more than his name? Why couldn't she ever manage to put together at least one decent sounding sentence in his presence? She fought a blush.
Heero gazed at her coolly. He was wearing what she had dubbed "the new and improved Heero Uniform". That was, a green tank top, blue jeans, a jean jacket and brownish-black boots.
"Relena." Heero nodded to her, curt as always, then put out his had to her.
For a moment Relena stared at his hand blankly with no idea what he was doing. Then she realized he meant to help her up off the ground.
Blushing, Relena put her hand into his and Heero effortlessly pulled her into a standing position. Then he let her go.
"What are you doing here?" Relena asked, smoothing her ice-blue summer dress. 'Not that was care about impressing him or anything,' a voice in her head taunted her. 'Shut up!' she mentally ordered it.
Thankfully, Heero was too busy looking around for any possible enemies to notice her arguing with herself. His voice was distant and flat when he spoke.
"Quatre contacted me-"
"He did?" Relena interrupted, surprised.
Heero flashed her an annoyed glance-more emotion than he would usually showed right there--and Relena blushed guiltily, feeling stupid, like a little kid at a grown-up party, for some reason.
"Yes he did. He told me about the ball that you are required to attend tonight to celebrate our new, peaceful world." Heero sounded almost sarcastic and he paused here, maybe waiting for a defensive remark, but Relena said nothing. She was staring at her feet and fiddling with the buttons on her cream-colored jacket, uncharacteristically fidgety. Heero continued.
"I already knew about it, of course."
"Of course." Relena nodded, inwardly appreciating his broader chest, muscular arms and legs, attractive-almost pretty face, and unruly hair.
"Quatre thinks that this would be the perfect time for someone to attack you. The expected time, yet also unexpected with the recent crime low. He thinks it would probably be a good idea if I hung around you, to discourage anyone planning to hurt you."
The sun peeked out from behind a cloud and shone down on Relena's face as she processed what Heero was saying. He would stay by her side tonight for the ball. All night long, until the ball was over.
'And then he'll be gone again tomorrow, so don't get excited, princess,' the ugly voice in Relena's head rose again.
"It's true..."
"What's true?" Heero asked sharply. He looked...concerned? No. Relena blinked and was nothing on his face.
"That...people could still want to destroy the peace we have finally achieved." 'Oh, brilliant, Princess. Bet he won't even notice that you're so desperate just to talk to him that what you're saying is entirely stupid and obvious.'
Relena frowned, then noticed Heero staring at her with one eyebrow cocked.
She again found herself noticing how mature his face was, how beautiful, even without expression.
Heero raised both eyebrows and Relena's face turned beet red. 'He caught me staring at him!' she thought and turned away. "I'm going back to my quarters to prepare for the ball."
"Fine," Heero said and walked beside her.
'What is he doing?'
"You're going to follow me up to my room?" Relena asked incredulously, then wished she hadn't. She had a sudden vision of her and Heero, alone in her room, kissing, maybe even...
Relena shook the mental picture off.
"I'm following you back to the house. I meant it when I said I'd be hanging around you all night."
Again, there went Relena's mind with the her-and-Heero-kissing images when he said "all night". Relena shivered. "All night?" she repeated, feeling dread begin to creep up her spine, making her nervous, worrying she couldn't handle his being here all night with her.
Heero gave her a sidelong glance as they neared the door to the Darlian Residence. He nodded tightly.
Relena walked up to her room, knowing Heero watched her every step of the way, and shut the door firmly, a lesson in reality to herself as much as it was a warning to Heero not to follow her in her.
"It's only five o'clock now, two and a half hours until the ball begins," Relena said to her treasured stuffed bear, a gift from Heero on her sixteenth birthday two years ago.
"How will I make it through the night knowing he's going to be leaving me again tomorrow?" Relena choked back a sob of self-pity and fell against her blush-colored bed, holding her bear tightly.
"He'll be with me until twelve tonight, when the ball ends. Then he'll be gone again for who knows how long," Relena whispered.
Her bear had no answer to give her, lying against her on the white pillows and pale pink blankets.
Relena sighed and let him go, picking herself up and heading for the bathtub.
"Well, if there's nothing I can do about it, might as well stop whining." The bathroom door shut and Relena's teddy bear lay all alone on the bed, looking as sad as Relena felt.
If only she could have known how Heero felt, more specifically how he felt about her. But he wouldn't even admit to himself he cared for her. Or that he could even feel at all...
"I don't have emotions. And certainly none for her," he told himself outside her room in the hallway, trying to force himself to believe it.
'Oh yes you do-o...' The Truth whispered.
'Shut up. Now.'
'Fine, deny it. Make yourself and her suffer.'
Heero stopped his relentless pacing outside her door and wondered in his head, was Relena suffering because of him?
No, she couldn't be. She was just tired. And it didn't matter to Heero if Relena did care for him anyway...did it?