Sighing heavily, Cain settled back into his downy pillows and stared at the inky shadows around him and let his mind wander freely. He knew the ceiling was above him somewhere and he strained to make out the swirled pattern of white paint on it through the darkness. Failing to do so, he attempted to identify any of the distinguishing features of the guest room he'd been assigned to for the night to no avail. He was surrounded by darkness so completely, not even a hand raised in front of his face was visible.
The memory of the black nights he'd spent isolated in his metal prison sent waves of panic tingling through him. He knew he was safe, knew he was at the palace in an overly large bedroom with misty blue wallpaper and undoubtedly expensive furnishings. He wasn't in the suit anymore; DG had set him free, he reminded himself again. But the feeling of dread refused to subside. With his eyes screwed tightly shut, Cain listened to his heart beating wildly in his chest and his breath quickening with every second that passed as he felt the walls closing in on him.
The smell came first, the scent of metal and several years' worth of his own accumulated sweat and grime in the hot recycled air. He nearly gagged with revulsion and clenched his clammy fists into the soft sheets beneath him in an effort to keep his dinner down. Instead of the minty flavor of toothpaste, he tasted plaque and thick mucus on his tongue. He longed for cool fresh water, and though he knew perfectly well that he'd gorged himself on it at every given opportunity in the past week, it felt as though he hadn't had a drop in annuals.
With a horrified whimper, Cain bolted from the bed and out the door. His bare feet slapped against the marble floors as he sprinted, trying to outrun the fear that clawed mercilessly at him. Finding a door that appeared to lead outside, he threw it open and found himself on a balcony overlooking the manicured lawns of the palace. He took in great gasping breaths of cool night air, unmindful of any noise he was making, and leaned heavily against the ornate stone railing. How long he spent doubled over and panting, he wasn't sure, but he'd stopped trembling by the time he heard someone approaching.
The sound of careful footsteps increased until he saw her emerge from the shadowed doorway. DG's dark hair was tied back and tousled from sleep and her face was pink with a crease running down her left cheek as though she'd fallen asleep on her arm and her thin nightgown had made an imprint on the tender skin. Taking note of her state of dress, he realized he too was in only his night clothes, a simple undershirt and loose flannel pants. She'd at least had the sense to put on slippers, he observed, curling his toes away from the cold stone beneath his feet.
"Cain?" she whispered softly, peering through the shadows to find his form silhouetted against the dim moonlight.
"Yeah, kid, it's me," he called back tiredly. He didn't like her seeing him like this, but consoled himself that at least she hadn't found him cowering and desperately struggling to breathe. He could retain that small shred of dignity.
"I heard you go past my door. What's going on?" DG was never one to beat around the bush, and though he enjoyed her directness most times, tonight he was too weary to explain anything, even to her.
"Nothing. You should go back to bed." Cain tried to keep an authoritative tone in his voice in the hope that she would listen to him for once and leave him to regain his composure in peace, but that would have made things far too easy. She took three more steps forward, searching his face for answers.
"Not likely," she scoffed. "Can't sleep." He wasn't sure if she was talking about him or herself, perhaps both of them. She must have seen something in his eyes that she understood because she nodded once and looked away, heaving a drowsy sigh.
Silence wrapped around them comfortably as she moved next to him to lean on the railing at his side. Folding his arms across his chest, Cain waited for her to speak again. He could tell she had far too many thoughts in her head and she wasn't the type of person to let her thoughts go unsaid.
"So, what happens now?" Only a week and he knew her better than he knew his own son.
"You become a princess again, Glitch reunites with his brain, Raw gets to be a hero and I…" - learn to live again, find my son, figure out where the hell I fit in anymore - "…get back to my life, I suppose."
"You mean you're not staying here?" DG looked genuinely upset by the thought that he wouldn't remain at her side and he almost smiled; she was so young and thought the camaraderie they'd found on their adventure would last forever. That wasn't how the world worked, unfortunately, and he knew first hand how those you loved and needed most would be stripped away by time one by one until you were completely alone.
"I don't like the idea of living off others' backs, being a permanent guest out of misplaced gratitude." The notion that they would allow him to stay out of pity disturbed him even more. He was no one's charity case.
"We could find you a job at the palace, then you could feel like you've earned your keep." She suggested, desperation edging into her voice. Cain couldn't stand to see the young woman's eyes begging him anymore and looked away at the spot of light growing over the horizon.
"And what would my job be, Princess? Would I be your bodyguard?" His eyebrow rose mockingly. "The ex-Tin Man following you around the palace like a loyal pet?" He hated having to say these things to her, having to snuff out the flame of friendship – and maybe more –burning between them. Finally he turned back to look at her and met her watery blue eyes. "I think you're swell, kid, and I owe you a hell of a lot, but I can't stay cooped up, even in a place as big and fancy as this."
"So, are you going home?" Cain didn't miss the icy glint in her words and admired how resilient DG was. She was disappointed, perhaps crushed even, if he wanted to indulge his ego a bit, but she wasn't letting it overwhelm her. She was clamping down hard and building a shell of anger to protect her still vulnerable heart. He was sure she would get over him quickly enough and be better prepared the next time someone she liked –loved? –flew out of her life.
"I don't have a home," he replied succinctly.
"What about the house we found you at?" DG shook her head in confusion. "Wasn't that-"
"I can't go back there." His voice was quiet but firm. There was no way he could return to the ghosts that lived in the small cottage he'd once built a life around.
"Let me get this straight, you have no place to go, no money, no job and only an alienated son who thought you were dead for eight years as family." She continued on, ignoring the sharp glare he sent her at that last part. "But staying here with a warm roof over your head, security, guaranteed free food and accommodating lodgings, people who love you and the chance to pull the tattered remains of your life back together would be terrible. I'm so sorry I suggested it." Her words dripped with scathing sarcasm and undisguised frustration.
DG wasn't going to let him leave without a fight and damned if he wasn't impressed once again with the girl's ability to completely knock the wind out of his sails. She was nervy and determined to get things her way even if it meant she had to make a man choking on his own pride and self-pity realize he was an idiot.
"DG, I…" He couldn't even begin to put his conflicting thoughts into any kind of intelligible sentence before she was rolling her eyes at him and pulling him into a tight embrace.
"Just shut up, Wyatt." Shooting up onto her toes, she pressed a warm kiss onto his cheek. "Get your butt back inside and try to get some sleep." He nodded absently as his mind ran overtime trying to catch up with what had just happened.
Cain's retreat back into the palace was stopped by a gentle tug to the hand DG was still holding, clasped between both of hers. "Don't let yourself fall apart because you're too stubborn to ask for help. We're here for you, I'm here for you. Always."
He didn't know what to say and instead squeezed her hands, hoping the gesture would convey his understanding and gratitude. The young woman had an uncanny knack for turning his life inside out and he wasn't quite sure if that was a bad thing.
The long walk back to his room was eerily quiet and made Cain realize just how far his claustrophobic frenzy had carried him. He had to admit that his life truly was in tatters as DG had baldly pointed out to him a few moments before. He hadn't lied to her when he said he didn't want to be a guest at the palace and neither would he become a guard dog. Beyond that, his options seemed slim. Did he have the right to stay at the palace? Should he leave despite DG's objections? And how would each decision affect the relationship he hoped to forge with his son as well as those with his new friends and, of course, with DG. His tired mind gave up trying to figure it all out and focused instead on how he would find some much needed sleep.
Slipping back through his bedroom door, he paused only briefly to turn on the light in his adjoining bathroom before climbing back into bed.