Laying in bed, you begin to stir awake. You had one of those dreams again. The dreams where everything begins flowing back to you again, even for just a split second. All the memories of Beforus, and what life was like before…what happened. But you can't keep those memories forever. Whenever you regain consciousness it's all jumbled up again. You barely even know what you're saying. Well you do, but it's just so damn hard to say what you're really thinking of. Why is it so hard?
You sit up, now done your rest, and you feel like there should be someone there, but they aren't… where could he—-I mean, she, be?
She's always here, snuggling with you, reading your favorite —no, she never reads to you. No one ever has, except—-dammit what's his name. Why does he—-is he even male? Are you sure he's not a she? Does it even matter?
Your thoughts are interrupted by a slight knocking at your door. Why are people even coming to your hive at like 4 AM? It's, uh, you think, Kankri. Huh, why would he be here, doesn't he know that you hate him—-or do you? Do you even remember what hate is?
He steps into your hive without asking. Why would someone even do that? It's god damned rude. You try to ask him what he's doing here, but it just comes out as insignificant slurs. But you stop abruptly because he suddenly wraps him arms around you. Something about this feels very…deja-vu-ish. But it's too vague and fogged to even tell. Especially with his arms squeezing you and his head so close to your heart. It feels like he's…trying to comfort you? But you're not feeling sad. Are you too sure about that? Are you too sure about anything anymore? Everything is just so damned confusing, but when Kankri's around…everything feels like it makes sense, but really, it's just gotten more mind-boggling.
"Mituna…"
You hear his soft voice, shaking and cold. Did he just spend the night in the ocean, or something? You look down to him, and see that his eyes have grown a candy-red colour, his tears shimmering in the moonlight. Why is he crying? Did you do something wrong? Didhe do something wrong? You try to ask him what's wrong, but he just motions for you to be quiet. He then lifts up on his toes a little bit to reach your eye level, and then whispers to you softly,
"I'm so sorry…for everything. But I'm especially sorry that I left you after that terrible accident. I was just mad of what happened, I didn't like seeing you in so much pain. I couldn't deal with it. I was so selfish. And I know you'll never be the same as you used to be, but…I never really got to tell you…"
Before you can even ask what he's even talking about, Kankri gently presses his lips against yours, which surprisingly feels right. Unlike when you kiss Latula. When you're with her, it doesn't feel proper. It feels like there's something missing, something missing that's…..red. When you're with Kankri, even though when he sometimes really pisses you off, it makes you really happy, and it makes you feel that you're actually well in the mind, although you know you're not. …Oh look. You were too busy thinking that you don't even realize that you're actually kissing him back. The kiss has gotten so deep, he's practically climbing into your arms. Did you even know that you loved Kankri? Probably not.
After a little while, you start stumbling backwards, and then you start to fall, luckily, right onto a bed, the one that Latula got for you and her.
Once you hit the bed, Kankri slips to the left side of you, but still part of his body placed onto yours, clinging to you. You turn to him, and he brushes your bangs away from your clear, white eyes.
"Mituna…I—-"
"Love you, Kankri."
For the first time in sweeps, you feel perfectly normal.
And you've never felt better.