Author's Note: Yo, It's Hollyleaf and I'm celebrating the New Year by [finally] getting one of my new fanfictions up! I've made it part of my New Year's resolutions to get some of them done faster. This is my fourth fic overall, my first for Pandora Hearts, my first one that wasn't for Hei x Yin and Darker than BLACK, and my first one of 2012 so I hope you all enjoy it. It has Alyss and Break as the characters but it's not them paired together if you were thinking that. It's a comedy of the scene where Break is thrown into the Abyss and Alyss says she will turn him into a chain. Obviously this isn't going to follow the manga exactly! It's not supposed to since it's a comedy on the whole scene. So don't go telling me about how something's didn't happen or happened differently in the manga. I know this already. XP
Disclaimer: I don't own Pandora Hearts.
"Ah!" screamed Kevin Regnard, later to be known as Xerxes Break, as he grabbed a hold of the bloody hole that used to house his left eye.
He fell to the ground in pain and watched as the pure white beauty named Alyss, also called the Will of Abyss, came walking his way. She grabbed his face and grinned. "Oh how wonderful you look in pain! I can't wait to slowly rip out that other eye of yours and give it to my little Cheshire. But first..."
She let go of his face and threw him to the floor. He stared at her, everything a blur, as she walked over to one of her many shelves. What can she do to me that's worse than what she already has? He found out when she returned, holding something behind her back.
"I'm going to turn you into a chain!" she said, smiling that bright smile of hers.
A Chain? She can't be serious! There's no way a human...could...become...a...Chain. OH what am I saying? After all that's happened I find it mad that she could turn someone into a Chain! That's probably just the start of what she can do! Break slowly rose to his knees. "Well why would you turn me into a Chain before taking my eye?"
"Oh you misunderstand," began Alyss, "I'm not going to turn you into a Chain first. But I can't take your eye out yet either. First I have to show you something."
"Something?" he asked, a little afraid of what the answer might be.
Alyss grinned and revealed from behind her back a book. "I'm going to have you look through this catalog!"
Break tilted his head, dumbstruck. "Um...catalog?"
"Yes!" shouted Alyss, "A catalog of Chains that you could possibly become. I want you to take look at your choices and I knew you'd need at least one eye to do so. Shall we begin?" She danced over to her tea table, sat down in one of the chairs, and motioned for Break to take the other.
Though he was wary of it, he still walked over and took the seat.
Alyss then flipped the book open to a page that had a picture of the Cheshire Cat, that was protectively sitting by Alyss and hissing silently at Break. "Now as you see here this is Cheshire. He wasn't a human to begin with but a cat. Animal testing first, right? Anyway he was the first thing I tried to turn into a Chain. However most first tries have there flaws." She then turned the page. "Now as you can see these were the three flawed forms of Cheshire. First he became a giant cat that couldn't fit into a room. Next he became a small monster cat with no fur but giant claws. Finally he is what he is now: a human-cat hybrid thing with no eyes. If you must know he had no eyes before but I was hoping to bring them back so I still say he's flawed. I would let you become this Chain but we already have one of those. Isn't that right, Cheshire?"
She petted the strange cat Chain and he purred in delight before giving Break a hiss of triumph; Break just rolled his eyes, as he didn't care that the Will of Abyss was giving the Chain attention and not him.
When she returned to the matter at hand, she flipped to another page of the catalog. "Now this is Humpty Dumpty, who I created from the discarded body of a man named Glen Baskersville. He was the first human I did it on since his body was already discarded anyway. Now here are his flaws." She turned to the following page. "First his body became a shell with it's normal head and limbs so it looked to weird to be threatening. Next the shell became his head so that just looked stupid. At last I settled for it to be a white sphere with eight black eyes, a set of stubby hands and feet, and a giant mouth with lots of teeth and a long tongue. It looks more creepy and unique that way, doesn't it? Anyway you could become this but we already have one of those."
Next she turned to another page. "This is Mad Baby. I made it from a living baby. Wanting to go up the age groups cause if it works for children it should work for adults, right? It actually had the least flaws. The only problem I faced was when we first changed him he had a body but no head. So I decided to ditch the body and do all head. But the head alone wasn't scary enough so I added spider legs and changed the eyes and made it go psychotic! We already have one of those and trust me I wouldn't want another."
"Now-" she began before being cut off by Break.
"For the love of all that is good in this twisted dimension, stop showing me what I won't be and tell me what you plan on making me! I'm pretty sure it can't be worse than what I've saw, especially that weird cat." he screamed in frustration.
Cheshire hissed and lunged toward him but Alyss stopped him. "My, my. Someone can't wait can they? Well alright." She began flipping through the catalog and stopped at a page close to the end. "Now here's what I had in mind for you..." She then turned it to Break. His face was a Kodak moment as he screamed "WHAT IN THE ABYSS IS THAT HIDEOUS THING?"
"What?" shouted Alyss, "You don't like it?"
Break shook his head, furiously. "No I don't like it! Who would want to contract it if they wouldn't even want to look at it!"
Alyss giggled. "But it suits you so well!"
Break would be more offended by that however a strange pressure came over him. He stared over at the Will of Abyss and she to was being affected by the pressure, for she was lying in pain screaming on the floor. He looked back at the sound of an opening door and saw a bloody little blond haired boy with a strange wine red eye, who was carrying a larger unconscious black haired boy, standing there. "Hello Alyss." he said with a smirk.
"V-Vincent!" growled Alyss through clenched teeth.
Whoever this 'Vincent' boy was Break knew he would have to thank him later for giving him the situation he needed to get Alyss off of thinking about turning him into a Chain. Especially the one she had picked out. Because in the end she didn't turn him into a Chain, in exchange for him promising to fulfill her wish. As for that Chain he was going to be turned into, Break didn't know who was used to create it but he knew that he was the contractor who was forced to look at it everyday.
So this was a different kind of fic than what I've written before but I hoped you all liked it. Reviews and constructive criticism are appreciated. No flames please. Also the name is like a pun: It's his REACTION to her saying she will turn him into a CHAIN. And can anyone tell me what was the Chain that Break was going to become? If you do you get a cup of tea! ;) PreciousAll and Anonymous both get a cup of tea for knowing that the Chain that Break was going to become was Mad Hatter!