A/N: Here's a nice New Year's gift for you! A medium sized Jily fic I've been working with for quite a while. Some secret admirer notes from Lily and James as their relationship progresses from 6th year to when they start dating, with a cheesy epilogue. Enjoy, and please review!
February 12th, 1976
Dearest Evans,
I have written this letter again and again, and have come to the conclusion that there is no easy way to say this.
I am undeniably and positively in love with you.
Whether it is your shocking red locks, or your brilliant green eyes, or your lovely personality, I simply cannot decide. All I know is that between your absolute perfection, and my own, we just can't continue to live like this. And so, I write you this letter to ask you if you would do me the honour of joining me on Saturday, February 14th, for a lovely Valentine's date in Hogsmeade Village.
Meet me in the courtyard at ten. I'll be the good-looking one in the Gryffindor scarf.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
February 13th, 1976
Dear "Secret Admirer,"
Nice try Potter. I know this is you, Remus told me you were in the Owlery yesterday night. Not that I cared where you were, he just mentioned. Besides, it isn't like you made your note very discreet. "Your perfection, and my own?" "I'll be the good-looking one in the scarf?" Obviously, my secret admirer would have to be a conceited Gryffindor, and Black isn't the one obsessed with asking me out daily.
So in answer to your question, no. I will not be meeting you in Hogsmeade on Saturday. As a matter of fact, I have a date already. One that won't sicken me to look at, like you would.
And stop shouting that you're in love with me every time I pass you in the corridors, it's getting on my last nerve.
All my hate,
Evans
February 13th, 1976
Dear Evans,
I will neither confirm nor deny your suspicions of my identity. You will just have to be in the courtyard tomorrow morning to find out, without your "date". Speaking of, who is the lucky bloke, hmm?
And in reference to your annoyance with a dashing mate of mine called James and his tendencies to proclaim his love to you between classes, he has asked me to tell you that he will not stop, because it is the truth, and because you look very pretty when you turn red, which you do when you are angry.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
February 14th, 1976
Dear Potter,
I don't have to be in the courtyard. I know it's you, I just saw you write that note and pass it to Peter to pass it to Remus to pass it to Mary to pass it to Marlene who gave it to me. And no, I wasn't watching you, but considering this is Transfiguration, and we're supposed to be practising spells and not taking notes, it was quite obvious.
I'm going out with Leonard Macmillan, not that it's any of your business.
And I do not turn red when I'm angry! Just stop bothering me!
All my hate,
Evans
February 14th, 1976
Dear Evans,
James was actually just doing his Potions essay that he forgot about in Transfiguration. So I don't know how Marlene got a hold of that note. Perhaps she's hijacking my letters. Not a very good friend.
Macmillan, hmm? Interesting. Well, I hope you both have fun today, seeing as you never showed up in the courtyard to meet me. Your loss, I suppose. I would have been much more fun of a date than some stuffy, Hufflepuff, straight-O's, Head Boy. Just saying.
And yes, you do actually. You were really red when that James Potter was making polite conversation with you at breakfast this morning.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
February 16th, 1976
POTTER!
WOULD YOU HAPPEN TO KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT WHY LEONARD MACMILLAN IS ALL OF THE SUDDEN HOSPITALIZED WITH GREEN BOILS ALL OVER HIS BODY? BECAUSE THIS HAS THE MARAUDERS WRITTEN ALL OVER IT!
I AM SERIOUSLY GOING TO HURT YOU! IF I REALLY DO TURN RED WHEN I'M ANGRY, WHICH I DON'T, BUT IF I DID, THEN I AM MAROON RIGHT NOW!
YOU BETTER HAVE AN EXPLANATION FOR THIS!
BELIEVE ME, I AM FAR BEYOND HATRED,
EVANS
February 17th, 1976
Dear Evans,
I would like to take this opportunity to remind you once again that I, your secret admirer, am not James Potter. However, James has asked me to pass along the message that he has no idea what you're referring to.
But maroon, huh? That's pretty mad. Luckily for you, when you turn maroon, you look very, very attractive.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
February 18th, 1976
Dear Potter,
Really? You have no idea? Then why exactly did Professor McGonagall give you detention every Friday for a month, and ban you from Hogsmeade next month?
I don't turn maroon! I was just stating that if I did turn red when I was angry, then I would have been maroon! I was merely using colours to represent my anger level! Which, by the way, is still very high, as Leonard told me this afternoon that he thinks it is probably best if we don't see each other again, but couldn't give me a reason.
Would you be able to tell me anything about THAT? Hmm?
All my hate,
Evans
February 18th, 1976
Dear Evans,
No, I have no idea; I'd suggest you ask James himself. But he has asked me to mention to you that he has other ways of getting into Hogsmeade, and then he winked in a very charming manner that most girls find sexy and appealing. Or so he's been told.
He also said that he may or may not have said something to Macmillan, suggesting that you may or may not be secretly in love with an unnamed member of the Gryffindor Quidditch team, and that it would be in all of their best interests to quit wasting your time.
So tell me, Lily, are you in love with any Gryffindor Quidditch players? Most of them are really very handsome. Especially the Chasers. Just asking, as a member of an objective third party. I'd really like to know who my competition is.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
February 19th, 1976
Potter,
I don't have to ask you, evidently you'd been bragging to your friends quite a bit, and Sirius mentioned it to Marlene. Also, I don't doubt that you have other ways of going to Hogsmeade, but in response to your suggestive and I'm sure positively repulsive wink, no, I will not illegally accompany you to Hogsmeade at any point in time, ever.
You may or may not have WHAT? Potter! I am not in love with any Quidditch players! I don't even like any Quidditch players! Besides Marlene, I mean. I don't like any male Quidditch players! No matter how handsome they are, or rather think they are in certain Chasers' cases! But I liked Leonard! Now, he won't even look at me!
You are so dead!
Evans
February 20th, 1976
Dear Evans,
James has denied any connotations that may have come with his winks. However, if you change your mind, the offer to accompany him to Hogsmeade without express permission from a legal guardian or Professor McGonagall still stands.
I'm very sorry about Leonard. I'm not so sorry about the Quidditch players, but I do think that you are in denial about the attractiveness of the Chasers. They're all quite striking. If you were ever to consider going out with any member of the Gryffindor Quidditch team, I'd suggest a Chaser. I mean, if you were to break my heart by dating someone else once more.
By the way, I just wanted to let you know that when you were yelling at James this morning, you looked very hot. That jumper looks spectacular on you. You ought to wear it more often.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
February 21st, 1976
Potter,
I decline your ever-so-classy invitation to join you without permission in Hogsmeade. Ever. I am a prefect, you know. In fact, I should probably turn you in for going to the village when we're not supposed to anyway!
I suppose I really ought to reconsider the Chasers. Frank Longbottom and Marlene are both very nice-looking people, although I doubt Alice would want me in love with Frank, and Marlene and I are both attracted to boys, thank you.
And shut up. Don't tell me I looked good, I was yelling at you. You'd do well to listen, then I wouldn't have to scream at you so often.
Evans
February 22nd, 1976
Dear Evans,
Are you sure you decline James' offer permanently? What if the right opportunity presents itself? You'll want to be absolutely positive before you make any executive decisions.
You know, there are three Chasers on a Quidditch team. You only mentioned two. Just reminding you to keep your options open.
James didn't say that you looked good, I did. But I'm sure that if he did say you looked hot, and received that reply, he might respond by telling you that he won't stop making you angry because then he wouldn't get to see you all pretty when you yelled at him later.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
February 22nd, 1976
Dear Potter,
Trust me, no matter what the circumstances, I'd rather suffer the consequences than ever go to Hogsmeade with you. Illegally, or legally.
I'm quite aware of the amount of Chasers on a Quidditch team. I go to all your matches. (For Marlene, you git.)
Fine then. I just won't get mad again, if you get such a kick out of it.
Evans
February 23rd, 1976
Dear Evans,
Okay, just making sure you're positive. Not that I'd want you going out with someone as charming, handsome, and all around brilliant as James. You'd be sure to fall in love with him forever, and I'd never have a shot.
You go to all our, I mean, the matches? I never knew that. I'm very happy to hear that the love of my life also has an interest in Quidditch.
So you're swearing off getting mad at James? Lily, love, as much as I adore you, between his clever knack for trouble and your fiery temperament, that is never going to happen.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
February 24th, 1976
Dear Potter,
You know, if I didn't know for a fact that these letters were coming from you, not only would I be much more creeped out than I am, but I would think that you had a little crush on yourself.
I am not the love of your life, so quit calling me that! I know it was you that spread around that I go to all the matches because of my secret love affair with one of the Chasers. Not very subtle, seeing as Frank has been head-over-heels for Alice for years now and as I've mentioned before, Marlene and I are not interested in each other!
If I hadn't sworn off becoming publicly angry with you, I would have slapped you by now.
Evans
February 25th, 1976
Dearest Evans,
I wouldn't be so quick to judge, darling. After all, who wouldn't have a crush on James? I personally think that everybody would willingly snog me, I mean, him without hesitation if presented with the opportunity. Including you. You're just in denial.
Well then, if this isn't a love affair, what would you call it? It's hardly a friendly correspondence between mates. And I do wish you would get publicly angry with James, because otherwise, there is absolutely nothing to stop him from spreading the rumour that you've been in the hospital wing because you're pregnant with the child of your Chaser lover.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
March 1st, 1976
POTTER,
I GET THE FLU FOR FIVE DAYS, AND ALL OF THE SUDDEN I RETURN WITH PEOPLE ASKING ME WHEN I'M DUE? SCREW MY PROMISE NOT TO GET ANGRY WITH YOU ANYMORE, I AM ABSOLUTELY LIVID! AFTER I FIND YOU, YOU HAD BETTER HOPE YOU STILL POSSESS THE ABILITY TO GET ANYBODY PREGNANT!
I AM STILL HATING YOU, DON'T FORGET IT,
EVANS
March 3rd, 1976
Dearest Lily,
Sorry for my delay, but I have been in the hospital wing with my good mate, James Potter. It seems that you, in all of your glory, had used the same curse on him that he used on your delightful date, Leonard, and he has been unconscious for the past day and a half. Never fear, however, he is alive and awake, and should be released tomorrow. Just in time for Quidditch season to start again! Perhaps you'll come watch our, er, the first practice tomorrow evening? I'll be looking for you!
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
March 4th, 1976
Dear Potter,
No, I won't be attending your first practice, seeing as I now have a detention for cursing you.
It was worth it.
Evans
March 5th, 1976
Dear Evans,
So sorry to hear that! I'm rather surprised that you landed yourself a detention. Your first, I assume? Usually you're so much cleverer when you hex James so you don't get caught. But I suppose since you did hospitalize him, it would be a bit difficult to be discreet.
Will you be attending our practice next Tuesday evening though? I, for one, would love to see you after a few days in the hospital… with James, I mean.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
March 6th, 1976
Dear Potter,
Yes, it was my first detention in our six years here. It was positively horrible, I don't know how you've managed it, what, a hundred and fifty times? I'll be sure to be sneakier next time. That is, unless you decide to start some rumour about how I'm eloping to Spain with my Chaser lover.
I won't be at the practice Tuesday. Marlene wants me to go, but I have exams to study for. I'm taking more classes than her, so she doesn't understand.
Also, I'm trying to avoid seeing you as long as possible. I find that my life is generally more pleasant that way.
Evans
March 7th, 1976
Dear Evans,
Ah, yes. James is truly a martyr. He's strong enough to handle the torture of a detention, whereas it has been proven that perfect redheaded prefects find the experience too much to bear. However, if you'd ever like to go back, I'll mention the eloping to Spain idea to James. I'm sure he'd get a laugh out of that.
I missed you quite a bit at our practice. However, you can't avoid seeing me for too much longer. We have Arithmancy tomorrow afternoon.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
March 8th, 1976
Dear Potter,
I honestly don't know how much longer you can keep up this secret admirer nonsense. You're constantly talking yourself up and dropping obvious hints. You are the only Gryffindor boy in Arithmancy.
And just so you know, I'd rather go to as many detentions as you've ever had back-to-back than elope to Spain with you.
Evans
March 9th, 1976
Dear Evans,
Again, I will neither confirm nor deny your suspicions of my identity. However, if you were to agree to go on a date with me, I would reveal myself. Also, you've forgotten that Remus is also in our Arithmancy class.
Are you sure? I'm sure that James in Spain would be very pleasant. He does have a lovely vacation home there.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
March 10th, 1976
Dear POTTER,
You don't need to confirm or deny, and I don't need to go on a date with you, I know it's you! And besides, I meant Gryffindor boys in Arithmancy who are obsessed with irritating me with everything they do.
Of course you have a home in Spain.
Evans
March 11th, 1976
Dear EVANS,
Are you really so sure? I could be Remus. These letters really don't seem to be irritating you. If they annoyed you so much, why are you still replying?
And James does have a house in Spain!
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
March 12th, 1976
Dear Potter,
Trust me, if you were Remus, you (James) would have hurt yourself (Remus) by now for being "in love" with me.
And I like to get mail.
Evans
March 14th, 1976
Dear Evans,
Fair point. Touché.
Really? That's your reason? You like to get mail so much that you've been replying to a stalker for a month now? Positive it isn't that you're just as in love with me as I am with you?
All my hopefully requited love,
Your Secret Admirer
March 16th, 1976
Dear Potter,
You hardly count as a stalker. Well, sort of. You're mostly just a nuisance. It would only be stalking if I didn't know it was you. But I do.
You wish I was in love with you. Unfortunately for you, I was out with Ryan Davies Saturday afternoon. We had a lovely time. Don't hex him.
Evans
March 17th, 1976
Dear Evans,
So sure of yourself aren't you? Ah well, I can't complain. It's one of the qualities I love the most about you.
Davies? That skeevy Ravenclaw Chaser in the seventh year? Damn, Evans, I knew you had a Chaser fetish, but I think you could do a little better than that. I try not to hex your dates, but I'll let James know not to this time. Not that Davies really needs to be hexed; I'm sure you'll figure out soon enough what a weirdo he is. Then you'll come running back to me.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
March 19th, 1976
Dear Potter,
It's none of your business who I go out with anyway. And I do not have a Chaser fetish! Ryan happens to be a very nice boy, and a very good Quidditch player anyway. Plus, he's an excellent snog. I won't be running to you any time soon.
Evans
March 21st, 1976
Dear Evans,
I think it's a little of my business who you go out with. I have a right to know what bloke will be taking my rightful place each month. Either way, I wouldn't be spreading around that you fancy yourself a Ravenclaw Quidditch player, what with the Gryffindor-Ravenclaw match on Saturday. During which I will be sure to inflict as much damage upon Mr. Davies as possible. For the spirit of the game of course, I wouldn't let my personal prejudices affect my Quidditch.
Eugh, don't tell me that kind of thing, Evans. I need to be able to eat tonight, and I can't do that when I'm picturing Davies shoving his nasty tongue down your throat.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
March 23rd, 1976
Dear Potter,
I don't really fancy myself any Ravenclaw Quidditch players any more. Ryan was awful sour after he lost to us yesterday. I don't really want to see him again. We might meet up over break though. Because, like I said, he is a WONDERFUL snogger.
Also, don't bother me this week. I have a huge Muggle Studies exam on Thursday and I need to study.
Evans
March 27th, 1976
Dear Evans,
I tried not to "bother you" as you said, but I couldn't resist today. I received four top-notch Quidditch World Cup tickets for my birthday, and would adore your company. I was going to take my friends, but we can always leave Pete out.
What do you say?
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
March 28th, 1976
Dear Potter,
No.
Evans
March 29th, 1976
Dearest Evans,
Worth a shot. Oh well, now Peter can come with us.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
April 1st, 1976
POTTER,
REALLY? JUST BECAUSE I'M DATING A RAVENCLAW QUIDDITCH PLAYER DOES NOT MEAN YOU CAN CHANGE ALL MY THINGS TO RAVENCLAW COLOURS! I HATE APRIL FOOL'S DAY. YOU ARE THE BIGGEST FOOL OF ALL.
EVANS
April 2nd, 1976
Dearest Evans,
No need to overreact, it was just a harmless prank. All your stuff has been changed back to normal. Granted, you did have to hold James Potter at wandpoint to get him to do it, but I thought he was a right good sport about it, didn't you?
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
April 3rd, 1976
Dear Potter,
Harmless prank? I had to walk around to all my classes that day in Ravenclaw gear! I got booed in the hallways! Not to mention, Ryan was totally flummoxed as to why I wasn't wearing my red and gold, and I can't exactly explain to him that another boy was in my dormitory and jinxed my things!
How did you get into my dorm anyway?
Evans
April 4th, 1976
Dear Evans,
Not too bright, that one, is he? Good thing he's handsome, and a "delightful snog", as I believe you so quaintly put it.
Magic.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
April 5th, 1976
Dear Potter,
I don't understand why you're against all of my dates. I mean, I do, but why do you have to make it so open? It's really very aggravating.
I don't believe you. Boys can't get past the girls' staircase, it's impossible. And so unless you got a girl to jinx my things for you…
MERLIN, YOU GOT MARLENE TO DO IT, DIDN'T YOU? JUST BECAUSE NONE OF YOU LIKE RYAN DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN ALL BAND TOGETHER AGAINST ME! I DETEST ALL OF YOU!
Evans
April 7th, 1976
Dear Evans,
You said it, not me. I can't confirm or deny James' ways of messing with you. But I heard through the grapevine that you're not speaking with Marlene, so you can probably come to the conclusion that you're correct.
All my love, even though you did try to blast my glasses to smithereens,
Your Secret Admirer
April 8th, 1976
Dear Potter,
You heard correctly. I am no longer speaking with Marlene, due to her willingness to ally with you Marauders, among other reasons.
I wish I did blast your glasses off. I wish I could blast your face off, so that next time you make me mad, you didn't give that stupid crooked smirk when I yelled at you.
Evans
April 9th, 1976
Dear Evans,
Among other reasons? Do tell. Mostly because Marlene won't.
Your sunny disposition never ceases to thrill me. I love when you wish for my destruction.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
April 10th, 1976
Dear Potter,
Of course Marlene won't tell you lot, it concerns you. Or rather one of your mates. But it isn't my place to say.
So glad I could warm your heart. I'm joking of course; I don't even believe that you possess a heart.
Evans
April 11th, 1976
Dear Evans,
Which of my mates does it concern? She still won't tell us.
Of course I possess a heart, my dear! What else would I love you with? What else would drive my desperate attempts to get you to feel the same way about me?
All my love and desire,
Your Secret Admirer
April 12th, 1976
Dear Potter,
Oh come on, now. Think really hard. What do girls fight about mostly?
I could think of a few other things that might drive your desperate attempts.
Evans
April 13th, 1976
Dear Evans,
I don't know, clothes? Makeup? Shoes? Boys? OH… Wait, she doesn't… One of my mates? Who?
Funny, Evans. Really funny. The only thing better than your sunny disposition is your sense of humour.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
April 14th, 1976
Dear Potter,
She does. Don't tell her I said anything though! Please!
Evans
April 16th, 1976
Dear Evans,
Wait, which one of my mates does she fancy then? And why do you care if I say anything anyway? You and Marlene still aren't speaking.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
April 17th, 1976
Dear Potter,
Oh come on, I'm not going to give you all the answers! Just watch her, you'll be able to figure it out. She's quite the flirt.
And I care because we're still best mates, even though we're fighting. It wasn't a necessarily final argument we had. I still care about her. I don't want to see her get hurt.
Evans
April 18th, 1976
Dear Evans,
Sirius? It has to be Sirius. The two of them are almost sickening to watch, now that you told me to look for it.
That doesn't make any sense at all. Females. She hurt you, don't you want revenge? Isn't that why you're telling me what she won't?
But just saying, if that is the case, I don't think Sirius will hurt her. He fancies her too.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
April 19th, 1976
Dear Potter,
You said it, not me.
And no, I don't want revenge. I mean, sure it would be nice to get her back, but that's not why I told you that she fancies Sirius. But since you asked, and we're not technically friends right now, I shouldn't feel any guilt for telling you. Right?
Good, I don't want Sirius to hurt her. I want her to be happy. She's my best friend, after all.
Evans
April 20th, 1976
Dear Evans,
Girls don't make any sense. You're mad at her, but you don't want revenge. You'll tell her secrets, but you want her to be happy?
When blokes are mad at each other, we just punch each other until we're good.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
April 21st, 1976
Dear Potter,
Trust me, I'm well aware that we don't make sense. But it's better than fighting like a couple of barbarians.
Evans
April 23rd, 1976
Dear Evans,
If you aren't going to fight, and you're going to help her out, shouldn't you just make up already? Or are you both just too proud to admit you miss each other?
By the way, Sirius is going to ask her to Hogsmeade for May 22nd once we get back from break. So that reminds me, are you interested? You'll finally get to know my identity!
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
April 24th, 1976
James, no offence, but your identity hasn't really been secret for a while now. You haven't even been bragging about yourself in third person.
Evans
April 25th, 1976
Dear Lily,
Are you sure you don't want to reconsider my offer? I think you've fallen even more in love with me. Recent signs have told.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer Whose Identity May Or May Not Be James Potter
April 26th, 1976
Potter, of course I don't want to reconsider your offer. I am not in love with you, and I never have been! What recent signs?
Evans
April 28th, 1976
Dear Evans,
Well, two letters ago, you called me by my first name for the first time ever. And you also included the phrase, "No offence", which are two words you have never said to me together.
Plus, the whole deal about you seeking my help to sort out your relationship issues with Marlene.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
April 29th, 1976
Haha Potter,
By pointing out that I called you James, you have also revealed your first name! So you can't keep pretending that you aren't yourself, even if I have been aware of it since your first letter.
And I didn't seek your help, I expressed my opinions, and you expressed yours. You didn't help me one bit!
Evans
April 30th, 1976
Damn it…
Hey Evans, want to just pretend the last couple letters never happened?
May 1st, 1976
Dear Potter,
Fine, but only to erase the fact that I called you James! Because it means nothing! Neither does my saying "no offence!" I obviously slipped up. I meant to say, "Offence intended."
Evans
May 3rd, 1976
Dear Evans,
Fine, just keep denying our love. One day, you'll come 'round.
You can't erase the fact that you and Marlene are speaking again though, right after I helped you.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
May 4th, 1976
Dear Potter,
What love?
So what if we are speaking again? Doesn't necessarily mean that I listened to you.
Evans
May 5th, 1976
Dear Evans,
The love that caused you to call me James just a few notes ago.
Really? Because from what I've heard, your exact words when you went to apologize were something along the lines of, "We need to stop being too proud to just admit that we miss each other."
Now confess that I told you that, and I won't sue you for plagiarism.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
May 6th, 1976
Dear Potter,
I thought we agreed that that never happened! You can't reference it! Void argument!
Okay fine, maybe I somewhat possibly might have used what you said to apologize to Marlene. That doesn't mean that I took your advice though! I would have come to that conclusion on my own; I used what you said to say it!
Evans
May 7th, 1976
Dear Evans,
Fine. But you never said I couldn't use the fact that you've been writing me passionate love letters for three months now, which you have. That proves that you are in love with me.
Just keep telling yourself that, love. I'll be busy taking credit for your renewed friendship.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
May 8th, 1976
Dear Potter,
I'd hardly call these love letters. I believe I've signed quite a few of them, "all my hate." And never once have I called you anything endearing.
Marlene told me that she was going to apologize to me soon anyway! She said that since she was going out with Sirius and I was going to be okay with it even if I didn't like him, she had no right to be mad that I was dating Ryan.
Evans
May 9th, 1976
Dear Evans,
What would you call them, then, if not a testament to our hidden romance?
Uh huh, right. And who do you think talked her into believing that, hmm? You've forgotten that even though I've been writing to you for three months, I've been hanging out with her for the past several weeks.
Wait, are you still dating Ryan then?
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
May 10th, 1976
Dear Potter,
I'd call them written nuisances.
Okay, FINE, maybe you had a little bit to do with Marlene and me making up, but you didn't help me!
Yes, what's it to you?
Evans
May 12th, 1976
Dear Evans,
Whatever you call it, I'll be bringing it up when people ask me, "When were the first signs that Lily Evans was actually in love with you?"
I just didn't realize that you hadn't broken up with him yet. I don't see you with him ever. So is that why you won't go to Hogsmeade with me next weekend?
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
May 13th, 1976
Dear Potter,
You won't need to bring them up. I'll never be in love with you.
You say that as if I'll be breaking up with him some time in the near future. We've been going out for two months now. And I do hang out with him, but he's a bit busy getting ready for the Quidditch match against Hufflepuff on Saturday.
And in answer to your question, no, he isn't the reason I won't go to Hogsmeade with you. Regardless of whether I am in a relationship or not, it doesn't change the fact that you're an arrogant berk and I'd rather be caught snogging the Giant Squid than you.
Evans
May 14th, 1976
Dear Evans,
You say that so often, it's no wonder I doubt you.
Really? You'd rather snog the Giant Squid than me? I've heard that I'm quite a splendid snogger. Can't say the same about the Giant Squid.
Although I suppose snogging Davies is practically the same thing.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
May 16th, 1976
Dear Potter,
Well, considering it's the truth, you'd think I wouldn't have to repeat it so often. But you're incessant.
A splendid snogger? Who told you that, your mum? Your pillow? Sirius? I'd almost bet that the Giant Squid has more experience than you. The last time I remember you having a girlfriend was fourth year. And that was Betsy Jorkins, for a week, because Sirius dared you.
And that's rude. You've never snogged Ryan. Unless that's the snogging experience you're referring to.
Evans
May 17th, 1976
Dear Evans,
The truth? That's the story you're going with?
You know, Evans, you don't need to have a girlfriend to snog somebody. But I suppose a prude like you wouldn't really be exposed to scandalous acts like that.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
May 18th, 1976
Dear Potter,
Please, I've been to enough Gryffindor Quidditch Team parties to know that much. You get enough alcohol in your system and there go all your limitations. However, I have noticed that while Sirius, Peter, and sometimes even Remus make a habit of making themselves piss-drunk and escaping to the nearest broom closet or empty classroom with random females, you don't. Care to explain?
Evans
May 19th, 1976
Dear Evans,
Just because I don't make myself pissed doesn't mean I don't drink. But someone in our dorm needs to be sober enough to gloat and torture the ones with hangovers, and it isn't going to be those three.
Besides, has it ever occurred to you that maybe I fancy you too much to want to get with other girls?
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
May 20th, 1976
Dear Potter,
Oh, trust me, I know you drink. Need I remind you of post-Quidditch finals last year?
No, that hasn't occurred to me, because I know that it's complete and utter nonsense. You're just trying to cover up the fact that while Remus and Peter are probably downstairs flirting with anything female in the common room and Sirius and Marlene are off doing who knows what in some abandoned classroom, you're stuck in your dormitory writing to me every night.
Evans
May 21st, 1976
Dear Evans,
Ugh, don't remind me. I can still feel the hangover from the morning after.
Well, it should occur to you, because it's not nonsense. After all, I've been sending you love letters for months, even if you don't consider them that. I can only hope that one day my desperate unrequited love is returned even in the smallest amount. Until then, I shall be holed up here in my dormitory pining over you while my mates do whatever it is they're doing that I really don't want to know at all.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
May 23rd, 1976
Dear Potter,
Serves you right. Fifteen-year-old boys should not consume Firewhisky.
Holed up in your dormitory? Pining over me? That's funny, because I could have sworn I saw you in Hogsmeade yesterday, holed up in Madame Puddifoot's, pining over Zonko's across the way. Who's the lucky girl who forced you into that predicament, hmm?
Evans
May 24th, 1976
Dear Evans,
Looks like those beautiful eyes are as functional as they are gorgeous. That was in fact me trapped in Puddifoot's. The other boys convinced me to get a date so I wouldn't be walking around the castle alone for four hours while they were frolicking about the village on their own romantic endeavours. Needless to say, I did not enjoy myself. I could only think of you.
It was Isabella Mockridge.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
June 2nd, 1976
Dear Potter,
Either way, seeing you look so miserable certainly brightened up my date. Of course, only Isabella could inflict that much pain. Hadn't you heard by now how high maintenance she is?
Evans
June 3rd, 1976
Dear Evans,
Brightened up your date, huh? Well, I'm glad. Even if I did have to suffer almost unendurable torture, it was worth it. Why would your date need brightening up? Davies' snogging skills beginning to falter?
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
P.S. It's been over a week since you last wrote me, everything all right over in Lily-land?
June 4th, 1976
Dear Potter,
Everything's fine, I've just been studying for exams.
Evans
June 5th, 1976
Dear Evans,
That is one of the most complete and utter falsehoods I have ever seen written. You're forgetting whom you're talking to, here, love. I basically stalk you, and I know that you can only study in the library where it is silent all the time, and Moony has had us in there during every free moment all week studying.
What's been up?
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
June 6th, 1976
Dear Evans,
Seriously, where have you been? It was a gorgeous afternoon today, and the rest of the girls were all by the lake, admiring my stunning good looks in the sun. You were noticeably absent.
All my love,
Your Secret Admirer
June 7th, 1976
Evans, did you even show up for exams today? I mean, I know you were there, I saw you, but after that, you disappeared.
And I know you're not in the hospital wing, I checked.
All my love.
June 8th, 1976
Look, I know you've been studying, but I think you could take the time and spare some parchment to at least write me a word or two. It's a bit rude to keep ignoring me.
Still sending my love.
June 8th, 1976
Lily, seriously? I know you're just up in your dormitory, Marlene told me! And I know something's wrong, she told me that too! So unless you answer me, I'm coming up there!
All my love!
June 8th, 1976
James, please just leave me alone. I don't have time for you right now.