Years of Rainbow
T.V. Show: Grey's Anatomy
Pairing: Meredith/Derek
Author: Foxes' Dreams
Summary: "Pick me, choose me, love me." Easy to say, hard to get it done, especially when another human being is torn between. Meredith's outspoken words might be the essence of love, bound to repair them both. Spin-off for 2x04.
The hunger in me knows the burning in you.
Meredith's steps grew heavy and laced with inquiry, her own mind swimming in a drear labyrinth of sterile odor and emotions. Dodging people and secondary medical equipment, her eyes wandered in musing ecstasy, propelled and utterly motivated to resolve a tormenting issue.
In the other side of the barrier of feeling, Derek's eyes remained glued on the fine bubbles of soap getting lost in the evanescent waves of frosty water. He had never pictured himself to be torn between two contrastive women, poised on the verge of dissolution.
For the first time in career that required only focus and attentive willingness, Derek was finding himself at a loss of words, the diverting impulses of love lustily singing in his mind melodies of indecision. The upcoming surgery was described to be a difficult and labyrinthine task, but his trembling fingers seemed to be focused on affection rather than profession.
Just on time to disturb his threading inquiry, query steps and the slam of a door came upon him as an insufferable thunder.
"Meredith?" Derek asked, seeing her acutely constricted face stumbling in coherently through the door. "Rushing somewhere?" He continued anxiously.
"I lied. I'm not out of this relationship. I'm in. I'm so in, it's humiliating, because here I am, begging," She stuttered, trying to indolently pour out all the feelings that so deliciously tormented her heart, filled with formless dread.
"Meredith," Derek started caustically, feeling himself crumbling to pieces, poised on the verge of a bilious attack.
"Shut up. You say Meredith and I yell, remember?" She started, forcefully grasping the iron table beside her. "Okay. Here it is. Your choice? It's simple. Her or me. And I'm sure she's really great. But Derek, I love you. In a... really, really big... pretend to like your taste in music, let you eat the last piece of cheesecake, hold a radio over my head outside your window, unfortunate way that makes me hate you, love you. So pick me. Choose me. Love me," Meredith finished, contemplating Derek's flint-blue eyes with curiosity, searching a much awaited response.
Derek was entrapped in a circle of meditation, his head spinning at the truculence her words had unleashed. His love for Meredith had always been fragile and obscuring, disappearing in the mists of prejudices where the recognition of feelings was impossible. Now, in the upcoming cataclysm, he was finally free to decide, to separate himself from a toxic, stolid relationship and to head towards serenity.
His arms were around her instantly, comprising a level of enthusiasm he was powerless to ponder or measure. Their kiss was unlike all the others they had shared, it was filled with lavish reassurance and unutterable passion. Hands found their way towards her waist, holding onto tightly, never wanting to let go in an eternity.
Breathless moments passed in stately procession, leaving them both to realize the reclusive commitment.
"That means a yes?" Meredith asked tentatively, fingers grazing his neck as though palpating to see the reality.
"Yes. Without any doubt yes," Derek concluded, flashing a cheeky grin that left her mesmerized.
"What about Addison?" Meredith asked carefully, considering the fact that a person would still have to deal with the repercussions.
"She needs to know that we don't have a future. There's no point on hurting each other. She deserves happiness, but not with me," He concluded, gently stroking her golden locks, threading a labyrinth of strands.
It was as though the sky lit above them and everything started to make sense.
I think you and I were dreamed into being by the same long forgotten star.
There was one last step towards happiness, a monumental, ridiculously rationalized one, bound to break a person individually. Addison was the one in need of soul stitches, and the confrontation of decisions was bound to be unpleasant.
Addison was just gathering her remaining things in the stuffy locker room, completely oblivious to the grotesque news she was going to face. Derek decided to come alone, to protect Meredith from any meretricious or incursive venom his wife might unleash.
"We need to talk," He announced sternly and solemnly, his looks betraying the worst nightmare she could deal with.
"What is so urgent? Can't it wait for us to get home?" Addison asked, somehow irritated by platitudinous attempt at setting things straight.
"That's exactly the problem. How can you be so sure that I still want to have a relationship with you and not with someone else?" Derek retorted quickly, feeling the urgency coiling in the pit of his stomach. He had experienced a mix of love and resent towards this situation.
"I really hope you don't mean all of these. We are married," Addison spitted out bitterly, not showing any mercy. "We were supposed to have a legacy, something to hold onto. And now everything is crashing because of her!" She continued, blood boiling in her narrow veins, quickly approaching a pulsing point.
"Is there any point in staying married when none of us wants the other one?" Derek asked rhetorically, exposing a truth that was hard, almost illustriously hopeless to process.
Addison looked at him pointedly, tears stinging at the back of her eyes, striving for an outlet. Derek's words destroyed her entire world, provoking only a tidal wave of sadness.
He left the room wordlessly, with compassionate steps that were ruling his newly chosen life. Addison's sobs remained a fussy noise, fading with the distance.
Life is about saying things directly.
I think you and I shall never be apart.
The night proved to be desultory and confusing, veiled with the magnitude of decisions. As Meredith and Derek were leaving the hospital hand in hand, it looked like all the pathos of absurdity was long gone.
Author's Note: Happy Birthday, Andreza! I'm so glad to have found you since you became my voice of inspiration. There are miles between us and I hope this shy try of fanfic will warm your heart. I know how much you love Grey's and that's why my very first story is dedicated to you. I wish you health, happiness, love and many more shows discussions! :)
Read and Review! :*