The legend of Chode.
Vice City
(Cut to the Oceanview hotel, Vice City, 2004)
Jake: I'd like a room for the night please, I've had a rough day.
Hotel clerk: That'll be $45 please.
TGIE: Well Jake, I hear that there's a race at the Hyman tonight, want to go?
Jake: Sure, I just wish I could race.
Sly: I dunno about you guys, but I'm going down to the beach, I hear they have free jet-ski rentals for the next hour.
TGIE: Go ahead, we'll meet up at the Malibu later on, just call my cell.
Sly: Tootles!
(Cut to hotel suite)
Jake: Whoa! A fish tank, cool!
TGIE: Yea looks like it hasn't been cleaned since Tommy Vercetti came and…
Jake: What? Who are you talking about?
TGIE: Never mind that.
(TGIE gets his iPod video out and sets it on the charger)
Jake: Hey I didn't know you had one of those!
TGIE: Yep, bought it from Secondhand Circuitry up near Hyman Condos.
Jake: They're still in business?
TGIE: Well, sorta, they gave me a HUGE discount.
Jake: Why?
TGIE: Oh, I fixed a few of their PC's.
Jake: Ha-ha, an electronics store that needs help with their own stuff! Ironic.
TGIE: Ironic indeed.
(Cut to the alleyway next to the hotel, Jake and TGIE are starting up some Faggios, which are mopeds.)
Jake: Follow me, I know this place left and right!
TGIE: Sure thing.
(Mopeds buzzing down the main stretch)
TGIE: Wow, I don't believe I've ever seen as much neon anywhere.
Jake: Get used to it.
TGIE: How long do you plan to stay here Jake?
Jake: Hard to tell, I really like it down here, especially knowing that Hurricane Hermione has passed.
TGIE: I heard about that, the storm only came within about 2 miles of the city right?
Jake: Yep, came right up beside it, but passed right on bye. No one was hurt.
TGIE: Oh yes there was, one guy out on his sailboat, his name was Dane McGlone.
Jake: Poor guy, didn't even have a chance.
TGIE: ( Muttered under breath) He's a sucker in my opinion.
(Cut to the Malibu club parking lot and TGIE's cell phone rings)
TGIE: Hello?
Sly (On phone): Hey man where are you guys?
TGIE: At the Malibu, come on down.
Sly: Great , I heard there's supposed to be a dance off tonight, right?
TGIE: Unfortunately yes, there's some Miami Vice wannabe up here doing his famous "Vance Dance" or something.
Sly: Oook? Well I will see you guys in a few.
(TGIE and Jake in the club at a table off in a corner)
Waiter: Can I get you two anything?
Jake: Yea, I'd like two Yamaha YZ125's please.
Waiter: Come again?
TGIE: Oh don't mind him, he's out of it tonight, but I'll take a Red Bull please.
Jake: Never mind the dirt bikes, just get me a Monster energy dude.
(Sly walks up and pulls up a chair)
TGIE: Hey dude , what's going on?
Sly: Ah, I'll tell you later, I need to relax.
( Sly's face hits the table with a thud and he falls asleep)
TGIE: Well, somebody's tired.
Jake: From the looks of it.
TGIE: Hey Jake look who it is!
Jake: Whoa dude I never thought I would see you in town! Have a seat!
To be continued…