She'll Never Know
Author's Note: Hi guys! Before you read this, if you feel like you've once read a one shot very similar, don't worry, I didn't steal it or anything. It was a one shot I wrote about a year ago, and now I'm rewriting it now that I'm (in my opinion) a much better writer now.
This takes place just after the season 4 premiere. Just to refresh your memory, Klaus-as-Tyler saved Caroline from the council and left Rebekah there, resulting in their major fallout at the end of 4x01. My one-shot is a made-up missing scene between Klaus and Caroline where she visits him to ask why he chose to save her and not his sister.
Enjoy!
He knew she was there before he turned around; he could feel her eyes on him, her stunning blue orbs narrowed slightly as she scrutinized him, studying him like trying to piece together a particularly difficult jigsaw puzzle. He was difficult to read, he knew, how he would kill her friends one second, and save her life the next. She didn't know what to make of him.
Then again, it's not as though he could blame her. After all, he didn't know what to make of her either.
Every nerve in his body was hyper-aware of where she was and of all her movements even though he had yet to even look behind him yet. Centuries as a vampire had taught him to hone his senses beyond the point that seemed plausible, so that if anyone attempting to harm him decided to sneak up behind him, then they would find themselves extremely unlucky indeed. Because of these enhanced senses, a hundred tiny, little things alerted him to her presence the moment she stepped in the room.
It was the euphoric smell of her vanilla perfume that wafted through the air and invaded his nostrils, the scent of her creamy strawberry shampoo. It was the sound of the way her heels clicked on the wood floor, hesitant and cautious, yet determined, a woman with a purpose. This was also mirrored in her breathing, only small puffs of air as to not be overheard, wary, but resolute. It was the way he felt her eyes on him—those beautiful, stunning blue eyes—the shiver that ran up his spine, warning him that he was being watched, observed. He could almost picture her, leaning against the door frame with her arms crossed, body involuntarily tensed as she tried to appear casual; her eyes suspicious, her blonde hair falling over her shoulders and cascading down her back, like a majestic, golden halo. He imagined her eyes once again, though in his mind they weren't full of suspicion or hatred, but love, love for him. He remembered when she had looked at him like that, her eyes shining, filled with admiration and pure, raw emotion. Of course, that had been when she thought he was Tyler; when she had found out the truth in the forest, that it wasn't her hybrid boyfriend but was in fact the thought-to-be-dead Original Hybrid who had taken up temporary residence in the boy's body, the look of pure hatred and absolute disgust had been clear as day on her face.
And Klaus really didn't dare to admit it, but it had hurt. As if he had actually cared.
From the doorway of the room where he knew she had been standing, she strode over to stand beside him, her two-inch heels making loud click-clack sounds, seeming much louder in the silence that had enveloped the room. She looked over the sight before her with faint intrigue: a previously barren wall that was now stained red with scarlet blood. She could still smell the intoxicating scent of the blood (human, and obviously, still very fresh) and quickly pushed down her vampiric instincts that craved human blood, burying them like Stefan had taught her.
Honestly, Caroline was greatly repulsed by the sight. Not by the smell, for that was very obviously appealing toward her no matter how much she abhorred it. No, she was more bothered by how specifically it had gotten there.
Oh God, Caroline thought, feeling sickened, Klaus didn't go off and brutally murder some innocent bystander, did he? She shuddered at the thought, suddenly filled with the mental image of him brutally ripping out a young girl's throat, and severing a head from a random civilian's shoulders, blood splatters flying everywhere.
Caroline felt bile rise up in her throat at the thought, and it took quite some time for her to be able to force it back down successfully. Suddenly, in this mansion, alone with the most dangerous vampire in existence, without telling anyone where she was going, seemed incredibly stupid of her. Some might even go so far as to call it suicidal.
But she was Caroline Forbes, and she was a girl on a mission. She wouldn't back down. No way.
"I didn't kill anyone, if that's what you're thinking," Klaus told her in a monotone, watching as she eyed the blood on the wall with a vaguely revolted look on her face. Caroline gave him a look, her face displaying her doubt at his statement. He felt a prick of irritation, and went on to explain, "Rebekah did it. She got angry, and, as you most likely know by now, she has quite the temper." He pressed his lips together into a thin line as he seethed over his sister's foolish actions. "She decided to take it into her own hands to make sure I had no more blood to make my hybrids, so I would be certain not to dagger her so impulsively the next time."
Caroline nodded at his explanation, for some reason finding herself believing him. She was still unable to tear her eyes away from the rivers of scarlet. Elena. Elena's blood. The thought only served to make her that much more sickened. For not the first time that night, she questioned her sanity in deciding to come here tonight.
Klaus turned on her. "Why are you here?" he asked, his voice suddenly clipped and serious.
She gulped, caught off guard by his sudden abruptness. "I—well, you see—I just…"
"Spit it out, love, we don't have all day," he rushed her, exasperated by all her sputtering. After Rebekah's little spectacle, he wasn't really in the mood to deal with her snappiness and her constant rejecting of him.
She took a deep breath. Her throat suddenly felt very dry, and she cleared it. "I wanted to thank you," she said, her voice sounding surprisingly calm. She couldn't help feeling like she was betraying Tyler in some way by saying this, but she felt it was the right thing to do, considering the circumstances. "You saved my life," she continued, "even though you got nothing out of it and had no reason to do so. So thank you."
Klaus tried not to appear fazed by her words, but they were just far too shocking. Caroline Forbes was expressing gratitude… toward him? Who would have ever thought…
Yes, he had saved her life, getting no benefit from the whole fiasco. Because he felt something for her, because he actually cared. Ironic how he was the one to say that caring was weakness, and then here she was, becoming his; the light in the dark.
The light to my darkness, the dark to her light. We balance each other out, he realized.
She's perfect.
"…but I just don't understand why," Caroline continued, not aware of the turn his thoughts had taken. "You saved me, and yet you left Rebekah there, your sister."
"Rebekah is immortal," Klaus said curtly, desperately hoping she would drop the subject. "She is different from you and your merry-gang of do-gooders. She's an Original; stronger, faster, unkillable except by the wood from the white ash tree, something that the Salvatores conveniently enough hold in their possession, not the Council. She was perfectly safe." He spoke swiftly, his words smooth and suave, but Caroline didn't buy it for a second. He was obviously trying to down play the issue, but she wasn't going to let it go so easily. She continued to press the issue.
"No. That's not it," she insisted, surprising both him and herself when she took a bold step toward him. "It's something else, there's some other reason." She tapped her finger on her chin trying to figure it out. "Hmm, but what is it?"
Klaus ground his teeth together, feeling the remnants of anger beginning to rise up inside him. "Caroline, I'm warning you…" he growled, "stop while you're ahead." The girl just didn't know when to stop talking, did she? That mouth of hers was going to get her killed someday. "Stop making assumptions. You think you know something, but you actually know nothing." His face was up close to hers now, and her breath caught in her throat at the closeness, feeling his anger radiating off him in waves.
But still, her big, fat mouth didn't seem to know when to stop. Or perhaps she just had completely no sense of self-preservation. Stupid, damn mouth.
"But I don't understand!" she yelled, also getting up in his personal space. And it was true; she didn't understand. She felt frustrated, and confused, and she didn't understand one bit; she didn't understand him. He had saved her from the Council, had saved her life over his own sister's. And it confused her and scared her, because he was the bad guy, a psychopath murderer, but when he was with her there would be these moments when he really wasn't so bad, actually decent for a change, and she had been allowed to see that tiny human part of him that no else got to see. Because he fancied her, he'd said. And she was in full blown denial mode. Because evil wasn't supposed to care; evil wasn't supposed to feel. Evil was supposed to be evil and that was it, nothing in between.
"Why do you even care?!" Caroline suddenly exploded, shocking him into silence. She wasn't really that aware of the words that were coming out of her mouth, but she needed to get it out, to rave all her muddled thoughts at him. And boy, did it feel good. "Why care about me? I'm a teenager, just some random baby vampire to you. I'm young, naïve, and insignificant! You've lived like a trillion-something years and I've barely begun! Out of anyone, why chose me, why save me over your own flesh and blood? Rebekah's your sister; why not save her?!"
Klaus' eyes flashed dangerously, and before Caroline could even register what he was doing, he had her slammed up against the wall behind her. "Because I couldn't let you die!" he yelled. His right hand was gripping her arm in a stone-tight grip while his left arm was situated just under her chin, pressing into her neck and effectively restraining her from moving.
"Why? Why not?!" she yelled back at him. Both of their breathing was heavy and labored, their faces only inches apart as they stared into each other's eyes, their expressions intense and each mirroring the other's.
Klaus stared deep into Caroline's questioning, ocean-blue eyes, not knowing what to say. How could he even begin to explain to her the feelings he didn't even fully understand himself? He didn't know why he cared so much for this baby vampire, all he knew was that he did. No matter how many times he tried to shake his feelings, no matter how many pictures he burned, his feelings for her wouldn't go away. When she walked into a room all he saw was her and the rest of the world beyond them seemed to fall away. When they were together—like at the ball his mother had held in order to help bring about him and his siblings' deaths—there was only him and her, and nothing else had existed to him. Her smile lit up a room when she walked in, and when she laughed he couldn't help but want to laugh along with her. There was something about this girl… she was beautiful, and strong, and bright. He had never known anyone so pure and so good in his whole thousand years of existence.
Because of this, he fancied her; more than fancied her. He felt something stir inside him that he hadn't felt in a very long time, not since he was human.
He leaned forward slightly, pressing his forehead against Caroline's. She tensed up but surprisingly didn't move. She was more stunned than anything. He stared into her eyes and she stared back, finding herself unable to look away.
"Because I am in love with you, Caroline Forbes," he breathed softly. The word love felt strange and foreign on his tongue, but it also somehow felt right. He was in love with this girl, even more so than he had been with Tatia.
His words shocked Caroline so much that she staggered back at the impact they had on her, feeling as if she had been hit with a bunch of bricks. Klaus love? Love her? Nononono, it was simply not possible, couldn't be possible. Her mouth was dry and she couldn't speak, not that she would have known how to respond anyway.
And yet, some small part of her, a part she would never give any reign to, was slightly flattered; flattered that the Original Hybrid could be so evil, and so cruel, and yet for some reason cared only about her, loved only her.
Not that she would ever admit it.
Klaus saw that she was at a loss at what to say, and he couldn't blame her. But at least she wasn't yelling about how much she hated him; that was a good sign.
He leaned back slightly and took a strand of her golden blonde hair between his two fingers, fondly tucking it behind her ear, his hand lingering there for a few more seconds than need be. "I know you hate me," he told her, "and I know it's not fair to you that I feel this way." Caroline squeezed her eyes shut, and Klaus could see the beginnings of tears clinging to her long lashes. But Klaus continued on mercilessly, oblivious to all the confusing feelings building up inside making her want to explode. "You bring out the humanity in me, Caroline, something I thought was gone long ago," he told her in the barest of whispers. "I love you. I know I shouldn't, but I do."
Caroline felt a tear slip down her cheek despite all her efforts to hold it back. She didn't know whether she wanted to sob, throwing herself into his arms, or to scream, beating him with her fists, yelling at him for doing this to her, for confusing her so. She was beyond forming words; she couldn't even form thoughts, let alone coherent ones.
"Shh, love, don't cry," Klaus soothed, swiping away the single teardrop. Where their skin made contact burned, sending a tiny bolt of electricity through her body. A sob tore itself from her throat at his gentle movements, because it just made no sense. Nothing did, not anymore.
"You are my weakness, Caroline," he told her, his face suddenly seeming older, sadder. "I cannot afford to be weak." Loving was a vampire's greatest weakness, and he would not be weak. He would not allow his feelings for her to weaken him. "And because of this," he breathed, his voice mournful, "you can't know this."
Caroline's eyes widened when she realized what he was going to do. She struggled in his grip trying to wrench herself away, but it was no use, he was just to strong.
His eyes diluted, staring deep into her crystalized blue ones. "You are not going to remember any of his," he told her. "You are going to forget that you came here, and you are going to forget what I told you." He brushed his knuckles against the smooth skin of her cheek one last time, trying to memorize the feel of her skin against his, and then he stepped back, breaking eye contact and leaving her with that familiar daze in her eyes that came from being compelled.
"It's better this way," he told her. He would not be weak, he would not care. He couldn't allow her to weaken him anymore. It would only end in both of them dead. "I am going to find a way around this," he promised, "around you."
"Now go," he compelled, and without a thought of what she was doing, the blonde vampire turned on her heel, walking in a daze from the room, and from the mansion, not looking back as Klaus watched her go, looking heartbroken. The Original Hybrid had never felt so vulnerable.
He had proven to her that he was capable of a non-selfish act. She would just never remember it.
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I hope you enjoyed
-Heather (PhoenixHalliwell)