Don't own Naruto. . .
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"I've never seen him cry, sulk or give in." Kakashi.
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He looked at his reflection in the mirror, then sighed. Blue eyes rimmed red, blotchy red streaks running down his face, the skin around his eyes puffy. He rubbed a hand over his face, whisking away the streaks of water that remained on his face, leaving salty trails. He had been crying again and he hated it. He hated the tears that would run down his face, hated the way he looked after it. He frowned, then clenched one fist, promising himself that he wouldn't cry anymore. Not for himself at least. No more self-pity, no more sulking. He was a ninja, wasn't he? He looked at his reflection again, then smiled, running to his closet, dressing in his orange and blue jumpsuit, then grabbing the goggles that sat on his nightstand. He fixed them on his head, putting them on his forehead in place of a ninja headband. So, he wasn't a ninja yet, but he would be soon. And ninja don't cry. He grinned at his reflection in the mirror, then dashed off to class, laughing. But his tears showed his loneliness, his quiet pain, that secret suffering that he endured every day.
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He crouched behind a tree, clutching a scroll to his chest. The scroll, the forbidden scroll, the scroll that threatened to ruin his life was nearly as big as he was, but he refused to let it go, clutching it with both arms. He had just found out that he. . .he was the vessel for the nine tailed fox, the monster that had almost destroyed the village thirteen years before and had killed the Fourth Hokage. . . and Iruka-sensei had cried for him. . . something that had never happened to him again. He could hear the liar, Mizuki talking to Iruka-sensei, calling him a "freak," a "beast," saying that he only wanted the scroll for vengeance. Then. . . then those awful words from Iruka-sensei's mouth. . .the ones he had never wanted to hear. "You're right. . ." With those two words, he knew what his sensei thought, knew Iruka-sensei thought of him as a monster. . . but then. . . but then more words. . . ones he had never heard before. ". . . That is how beasts are. But that's not who Naruto is. He's nothing like that. Naruto's one of a kind. Works hard, puts his whole heart into it. Sure he messes up sometimes and everyone jumps on him. But his suffering only makes him stronger. That's what separates him from everyone else. So you're wrong. He's nothing like the nine-tailed fox. He's Naruto Uzumaki of Konoha." He cried again as Iruka talked, not out of self-pity, but because he had never had anyone say something like that about him before. After the fight . . . after everything, he found himself crying again. . . crying for happiness, this time. Iruka had tied his headband around his head, saying "You graduate!" And the tears that came from his eyes were because he was happy, truly happy for the first time in his life and his tears showed this.
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After becoming a ninja, he didn't cry for himself any more. He only cried for others. He cried for Sasuke when he thought his friend was dead, he cried for Haku, he cried for his friends, he cried from happiness, he cried from frustration when the tests got too hard, but he never cried for himself. He had finished that long ago. Even when he was alone again, in his room, training, the weight of the world falling on his shoulders, he never cried. And his friends and teammates noticed this. His teachers noticed this, noticed his strength. His sensei, Kakashi, noticed this, remembering his friend Obito, who would cry all the time. How Naruto reminded him of that boy. Jiriah noticed this, remembering his student, Minato, a strong ninja who learned fast and gave his life as Hokage. How Naruto reminded him of that boy. And Iruka noticed this, remembering Naruto before, the boy who cried alone in his room every night, but laughed and played outside of his room, acting as if nothing was wrong. Naruto was that boy, but he was a stronger boy now. . . now he was a ninja.
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He grinned as he stood on the electric pole, looking over Konoha, feeling the wind on his face. He was back. After three long years, he had finally come back to his home. He talked with his friends, then finally was able to go back to his apartment. He sat down on the bed, looking around it, smiling a bit as memories played in his mind. As he looked around, he thought of the last time he had cried. It had been after Sasuke had left, when he was alone in the hospital. He had been sitting on the bed, looking at the headband he cradled in his lap. There was a long scratch across the logo, a scratch he had put there. Sasuke had fought him and left and he was left alone and cried. But that was the last time he had cried. . . ever. But now as he thought about it, he felt tears prick his eyes. He shook his head. No. He wasn't going to cry now. He was older, he was mature, he was a ninja and ninja didn't feel. He frowned, then stood, knowing he had to have his Ichiraku ramen, something else he hadn't had for two years. He had tried a lot of ramen, but none was as good as Ichiraku. He grinned, running out to get his favorite ramen in the world.
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He rushed through the trees, the forest, just a blur around him, blurred by both his speed and the tears that filled his eyes. He wasn't crying for himself, he was crying out of anger, mad at the world. He had just gotten the news that Gaara had been taken by a group called the Akatsuki. He didn't understand why people treated the Jinchurriki why they did. Kakashi said "Calm down. " he said "I can't stand it! Even I know why they're after me and Gaara. . . ! " Then he told them. . . told them about Kyuubi, the demon fox sealed inside of him. . . the thing that had caused him so much pain. "Me and Gaara. . . because we have monsters contained in our bodies. . . that's what they're after! That's what I can't stand! Just seeing us as monsters, I can't stand them looking at in whatever way they feel like!!! He and I are. . . the exact same. . . and he was. . . fighting, he was more lonelier than I was. . . !" He thought of the pain in Gaara's eyes, the lonliness, what he had said when they had first met about how he was nothing to anyone, and how the only way he had to exist was to kill everyone except himself. ". . . He was targeted by Akatsuki. . . Just like I was before. . .! Even so! Why is it always him alone that has to have such a hard role?!!! Always him alone?!!! . . . that's why! That's why I won't just sit around asking 'Why'! This time for definite, I want to save him !" And the tears that came from his eyes were tears of anger. . . anger at the world for the pain that they had caused him and the pain they had caused his friend. . . just because they were something different, something strange, something not accepted by anyone.
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He stood in the grass, the wind blowing his hair gently, staring down at the cold body of his friend. He couldn't believe it. After all that work. . . to find Gaara dead. . . He shook his head, not beleiving it. " . . Why. . . was Gaara. . . Always Gaara. . . to die like this. . .! He's the Kazekage. . . He didn't just become Kazekage. . ." Chiyo told him to calm down. "SHUT UP!!" He yelled, the tears that had been gathering in his eyes spilling down his cheeks as he spun around to face them, face the small crowd gathered behind him. If you shinobi of the sand hadn't put a monster in Gaara, then nothing like this would've happened!!! Did any of you even try to ask Gaara how he felt?!!!what is this "Jinchuuriki" anyway?!! You just arrogantly made up that word to call them!!! He started crying, his face buried in one hand as his shoulders shook as he sobbed. "I couldn't save Sasuke. . . and I couldn't save Gaara. . . for three years. . . I trained desperately. . . but nothing's changed since three years ago, has it. . ." His voice died as he sobbed. And the tears that came from his eyes were tears of sadness for losing his best friend, tears of anger at the people who had stolen him away. . . but not for himself.
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He no longer cried for himself, only people. And the tears that came from his eyes showed his good heart, his soft heart, a caring heart hidden under the mask of a ninja. And the tears show the real Naruto, the real ninja, the one who just wanted to be loved, the one who just wanted a friend. And the tears show the real Naruto, who now has friends and is accepted and loved and respected.
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I thought of this when I heard the quote that's at the top of the story. I hope you like it. It's kinda drabble. . .enjoy!!!!