Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from the Superman series or from Superman Returns...which is very unfortunate for me.

Author's Note: I cowrote this lovely story with one of my very best friends, who wrote the 1st chapter that you are about to read...we would also love your feedback :). Oh, and if you read my story, Inside Your Mind, my Harry Potter fanfiction, I am about one and a half pages away from being finished with a brand new chapter for you.

Summary: My friend and I are slash addicts and wanted to write a twisted story where Clark's alteregos have two different love interests...who also happen to be engaged. Richard/Clark, Superman/Lois.

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The Adventures of Lois and Clark and Richard
Chapter One

In all reality, all Clark wore was a cape and some blue long johns. That, and he hadn't figured out that the underwear goes on the inside of your clothes. Especially when it was red. But if that was the only thing that made Superman different from everyone else, then why didn't anyone figure out that Clark Kent was Superman, or that the Man of Steel had a secret identity at all? Seriously, no wonder Jor-El sent his only son down to a planet where he would have superhuman senses: the people there were stupid enough to be fooled by a pair of glasses and bad posture.

Wow. Clark really did have a temper. Of course he would never do anything rash, but that mild mannered reporter could be quite the bitch when he wanted to. Usually Kent was what most would call a pushover, constantly at the beck and call of a very beautiful Lois Lane, but today was going to be different. As soon as Clark walked into the Daily Planet bullpen…no one noticed his change in demeanor. Well, that's what I get for being a wallflower all my life…or a wall-something manlier than a flower. But I swear, today's going to be very different. While these thoughts crossed the farm boy's head, the one person in the world who could make Clark feel wonderful one moment and lowly the next walked by. "Lois…." The man raised his hand in a wave and when his ex-partner passed him without a second glance, Kent tried his best to make it look like he was fixing his hair, not getting ignored.

Today is going to be different. It has to be. That was Clark's mantra for the day as the hours ticked past, no one having noticed the not-taking-anyone's-bull attitude of his. Maybe that was due in large part to the fact that no one had talked to the massive reporter all day. Oh, but the best moments in life are unexpected, as Clark's personality change was challenged an hour later by none other than Lois I'll-kill-you-with-my-stiletto-heel Lane.

"Clark could you do this article on that riot at the dog show yesterday? Perry assigned it to me because there are no good Superman stories out there, but if he honestly thinks that I'm going to write a piece about insane poodles, he's got another thing coming. On my desk by five o'clock, okay?" Lois had barely walked a yard before she heard a soft, "No", turning around on heels that could kill and, well, probably have, she asked coldly, "Come again?"

Don't get scared by a tiny woman, don't get scared of a tiny woman…she's not Kryptonite. Clark stood up to his full height, an astonishing 6 feet 4 inches and though he stood a good foot above Lois, the reporter felt about two inches tall. Well say something or she might stab you in the eye with her heel. God knows it won't work, look what happened to that bullet, but still, you know you don't like things in your eye. "No Lois, I will not write your article." Oh shit, she's tapping her foot. Run man, run to freaking Asia. "And why not?" Didn't think much past No, now did you? Okay, your conscience will shut up now.

"Well because Perry assigned you that article, so you should do it. And I have a lot of work to do on my own, so please don't ask me to write the articles that you don't feel like doing. Time is very important to me, and I don't want to spend it like a little bitch. Thanks." Walking away, Clark felt very conflicted. One part of his mind was feeling very triumphant and manly, but the other part of Kent's mind was thinking: Shit shit shit. I DID NOT just do that. Shit. Run faster, she may chuck something at your back. Even better, fly, just up and fly. Who cares if the office finds out that you're Superman, hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. By the time Clark had left the office, the entire bullpen was silent, everyone surprised that bumbling geeky Clark Kent had actually told off the woman who had been jerking him around for the longest time. The workers would have applauded, but well Lois was still in the room and many of the people wanted to leave work in one piece.

The only person who had the guts to applaud the heroics of Mr. Kent was Richard White, who chuckled at the sight of his fiancé with her jaw hanging open, staring at her coworker's retreating back. But Richard had the protection of a sound proof office and a locked door to hide behind. It was about time that Lois got a taste of her own medicine, even though the last person he expected to give it to her was that nerd Clark. Hopefully the farm boy knew what was good for him and ran away fast, however, because that little woman kicked awfully hard. Unfortunately Richard would know.

Hurrying away to the safety of the open skies, Clark heard the distinct echoes of clapping as he turned the corner to the elevator. He whipped his head around and used his handy x-ray vision to find out who the mystery clapper was. Scanning the office while following the sound, Kent raised his brow when he saw Richard applauding the prior scene in the office, then turning around with a slight smirk playing at his lips. Smirking himself, Clark couldn't help but be flattered at his newest fan.

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Next up, some Clark/Richard flirting.