It's cold. My heart no longer beats, and I just feel so cold.
x
There's an old man and his grandchild holding hands. Her soft hand is wrapped around his bony one tightly. His knuckles are white, and he stops to cough alot. He lies and tell her she's alright, and she smiles and continues to ramble on about how different her high-school classes are compared to her middle school ones. He looks at her with a warmth in his heart, admiring this time. He is dying. He knows it, and he wants to spend some time with his family before it's his time to go. I notice these things alot everywhere I go. I feel and sense everyone's pain. Ever since I died It's been so different. There's a dark aroma around the small town I grew up in, and I feel like it's only here because of me. My soul lurks here, causing grief for my family and friends.
They only found out I died a little while ago, and my dead heart breaks even more when I think back to it. I understand Jeremy had to, and that it was the right thing to do, but I hate him for it. I hate him for taking their happiness away. I hate myself for taking everyone's happiness away. They all walk around with tear stained eyes, and cracked lips but to the world they look like gods and goddesses who have clearly recovered from such a tragedy. I can see it though, I can feel it. How lonely they feel, and how different they know it'll be without me.
I always figured death being different than this. I've always believed we'd go to heaven, the lucky ones at-least. We'd see the light, and we'd follow it to paradise. Where we can be with our loved ones, but I'm stuck here. As a ghost, I cant leave. I don't know how. I'm stuck here forever in misery, and I'm freezing.
As the months go by each of my friends get better day by day. Caroline can now look at a picture of us without dropping to the ground, clutching her stomach and sobbing. She can let herself believe that I'm in a better place now, even though I'm not.
"You're supposed to be here with me Bonnie. You didn't deserve this." She whispers into the privy night, a single candle lighting up her pale face. I am. I whisper back to her, but she cannot hear me.
x
There is a young couple in a car waiting for a green light. They both looked like they were sixteen years old, it neither of them were talking. The radio was off. They both looked comfortable, like as if they had just realized they made a huge mistake. Perhaps they did.
The rain is dripping down the window, and puddling around their car and the others. The girl was long black hair, and beautiful green eyes. But her eyes are sad, she's looks broken and bruised. Just by looking into her eyes. The boy looks stressed out, unbelievably stressed out, and tired.
They seem very absent in each others company, instead drowning in their own malignant thoughts.
The boy turns his head to her, and she turns hers. A minute passes and suddenly their lips are pressed together, and his filthy hand is in her shirt.
Raw forbidden love. Why that's best kind.
They whisper I love you, even though they both know they do not mean it.
It's essentially romantic.
In a way.
x
Elena feels disgusting. Her sire-bond has been broken, and she's woken up, but the damage has already been done. She can't believe what she's done and it kills her every-time she thinks of it. She slept with Damon. Multiple times, while Stefan has been hurting. She can't believe she did this to him. She hadn't known what she was doing, but she wanted to do it way before she had acted on them. The truth is she had feelings for Damon too, nothing that could compare to her love for Stefan but it was there.
Caroline had tried to tell her, she had tried so hard, but she didn't listen. Elena chose to ignore Jeremy's looks of disgust, even though deep down she knew she shouldn't have.
And now she's lying down emotionless on her bed, as tears she can't even feel continue to cascade down her cheeks.
She forces a smile thinking to herself, "It'll all get better."
Silly girl.
x
My father's gravestone is large. I feel as everyone in the world has been here, because there are just so many flowers and candles. All these people cared for him just like I do. He did not deserve to die that way, he did not. Silas had no right.
When I think about it, my father is in heaven. He is not here with me, stuck in limbo, so he has to be with the angels.
"I love you daddy. I'm so sorry this has happened to you. It's all my fault daddy. He was upset with me, and I let this happen. I'm sorry!" I whisper, bending down to touch his gravestone, not able to control my sobbing anymore. "You are truly in a better place. I love you. Rest Easy."
I walked away and never looked back after, my tears becoming too overwhelming. He wouldn't want me to be crying right now. He would want me to be smile and live on knowing he's proud of me. But he knows I'm dead now. He knows I've been dead all along now, so what could he even say to me if he could?
I'm proud of you?
x
There is fourteen year old girl in her bedroom. It's painted a beautiful teal color, with an extravagant chandelier. Her parents must love her very much to do this all for her. This girl looks like a smart girl, and she's very beautiful. I don't think she knows that though.
Her blonde hair is in a bun, and she's standing in front of her full body mirror. She's wearing spandex and a sports bra. She has to weigh at least ninety pounds, and has a perfectly normal body.
But she's crying. Her black mascara tears are staining her beautiful olive skin. She keeps saying fat over and over again like she's been possessed by her own mind. "I want to go away, take me away." she says to herself in the mirror. "No you dont." I reply.
"I'm ugly, and I'll never be good enough. Why do they hate me?" She cries, picking up a scissor from her dresser.
If I had a heart it would beating out of my chest right now, I want to stop her, but I can't. My dead body won't let me. I cover my mouth in shock cause I know it's coming. But then suddenly.
"Taryn you know how you said you wanted that Michael Khors watch? Well your report card came, and I decided to you it, since you deser-" Her mom walked in, holding a Macy's bag. Her eyes widened, and Taryn turned around quickly, crying harder.
"Oh my God!" Her mother cried, running to her, taking the scissors away, and hugging her tightly.
"I wasn't going to do it mom. I'm sorry. I thought I could, but I couldn't!" Taryn sobbed, hugging her tighter. "I'm so sorry!"
Yes you were.
"You're alive and you're here with me. That's all that matters." Her mom says, kissing her forehead and rocking her back and forth. "It's okay. It's going to be okay."
I smiled at the sight in front of me. This woman was truly amazing, and loved her daughter so much. I can feel how devastated she is that she almost lost her daughter, and I can feel how relieved she is that she didn't.
"A true beautiful sight isn't it? A mothers love." An intoxicating British accent said from behind me.
I turned around in shock. No one has been able to talk to me in months, and I'm just so shocked. Kol Mikaelson of all people though.
"Are you talking to me?" I ask, pointing to my chest, still in shock.
"Love, there's no one else here that I can be talking to." Kol replied, smirking.
"Have you been here all along?" I ask him, looking him in the eye. "Watching me?"
"I've been looking after my siblings, but something or maybe someone called me back here." He replied, his smirk still plastered onto his face.
I looked at him, my eyes cold. I haven't forgotten what he did to me. All the manipulation, and him trying to kill me.
"It's not so fun here on the other side is it love?" Kol says to me, as he leads the way out of the house we were in. I looked back at the mother and daughter and saw that the daughter had fallen asleep in her mothers arms. I smiled once more.
"It was funner when you weren't around." I said harshly, rolling my eyes.
"I'm wounded Bonnie." Kol said teasingly. "There's that spark I always admired."
"I hope you don't think we're all buddy buddy now because we're both dead and stuck here." I said to him, walking past him.
"I can't even imagine being that happy." He replied back quickly, his face serious.
x
I believe in the death in the emotions.
x
"Would you quit following me Kol?"
He's been following me around like a puppy for days. Telling me about New Orleans and what's going with his brother, and the baby. That one truly shocked me. It's nice to have company, I don't feel alone anymore. But I swear the Mikaelson family is cursed. They can do the most wicked things possible, but their charm and good looks always get them forgotten. I've always though Kol was attractive, and that his voice was liquid sex. But right now, It's taking everything I have left to control myself.
His constant flirting isn't helping my case either.
"Now why would I ever want to leave your side Bonnie? You're far too beautiful to ever be alone." He replied, smirking. Knowing what him saying that would do to me.
I looked down, blushing, avoiding his gaze. Praying it wasn't too obvious.
"You love my company Bonnie." He replied, smugly. "Would you really rather being alone right now?"
"Yes!" I shouted at him, looking him in the eye. "I don't want to be around you! You piss me off!"
"I've told you I'm sorry for all I've done so many times now. What more is it you want from me?" He says to me, taken aback by my out-lash.
"Desperate times call for desperate measures Kol. You're pathetic and just like Klau-."
Before I could finish my sentence he had me pressed against the wall of The Grill. "Don't .Ever. compare me to Niklaus." He growled, his eyes dark.
I had really hit a nerve. I didn't respond. I didn't really know how. He was so close to me. This reminds of when he had me pressed against the lockers in my school that day. It is possible to be so afraid of someone but turned on at the same time?
My breath hitched and I looked up at his lips.
Why is it that it's always the bad guys I feel attracted to? Maybe it's the whole idea of everyone knowing not to mess with him, and that when he wants something he goes for it, and makes sure he gets it. Or maybe it's the whole idea of him only being good just for me.
I rip my gaze from his lips to look at his eyes, but he's looking at my lips too. His eyes meet mine, and he turns his head slightly, challenging me in a way. My lower lip begins to tremble, and I want him to kiss me, I want to feel again, but I can't move.
Kol brings his hands up to cup my face before bringing his lips down onto mine. His kiss is so soft, tender, warm and not at all what I had expected when he pressed me against the wall.
For a moment he stopped, backing away slightly opening his eyes, watching my reaction.
I didn't want him to stop, I don't want him to stop.I grab the back of his head and pull him back to me, slamming my lips against his. This kiss was different than our first one. Our first one was sweet gentle, but this one is hott and steamy, and I cannot get enough. All the sexual tension between us has bungled up into this,and it feels so good.
His mouth molds over mine, parting my lips with his tongue. I turned my head, granting him more access to kiss me harder. His hands slide down from my waist to my legs lifting me up and I wrap them around his waist. He is so warm.
He kissed down my throat, and neck, driving me crazy.
"I've wanted to do this for a long time, love." he said to me, in between kisses.
"You have a funny way of showing it." I said,smiling as I captured his lips once again.
x
It's cold but I'm warmer now. My heart will never beat again, but I can feel the warm blood flowing through my body. I'm warm.
A/N- I've wanted to write a Kennett fic for so long now. I'm really proud of this. I hope you like it as much as I do. :)
Im praying something like this really happens in season five for them.
no beta, excuse mistakes please.
review please my loves.