AN: Yes, they did come up with such a thing. Here's a link; remove the spaces. magazine. com/news/view /94485-Manufacturing-Firm-Plans-Adults-Only-Sex-Box
Disclaimer: I do not own the Ace Attorney series or the Sex Box.
It was 9:30 A.M at the Wright and Co. Law Offices. Phoenix had absolutely nothing to do, so he decided to watch some old Steel Samurai episodes.
"Go to hell, Steel Samurai!"
"I think not, Evil Magistrate. Because I have one thing you do not – friendship."
("Who comes up with scripts for these episodes anyway…?") thought Phoenix. ("Well, at least Will Powers acts well. Jack Hammer did pretty decent too… Wait, this is a kid's show!)
Suddenly the door burst open and Maya rushed in. "NIIIIIIIIIIIICK!"
Once again, the door slammed against the wall. "Maya, how many times to I have to tell you? I can't afford another contractor for the office."
Maya, of course, wasn't listening. "Wow! Episode 21 of the Steel Samurai! That's my favorite episode! It's where…"
"…the Steel Samurai beats the Evil Magistrate." finished Phoenix. "Yes. I know." Phoenix then noticed that Maya was carrying a rather large box. Maya caught him staring and broke out into a wide grin.
"Nick, look! I won an X-Box at a competition!"
Phoenix let out a sigh of relief when she said won. "So, are you gonna plug it in?"
She grinned sheepishly. "Yeah… that's the thing… I was hoping YOU would do it…"
Phoenix let out an exasperated sigh this time. He knew first-hand how annoying this would be – Larry made him do it a few times. When he took the box out of the bag, his eyes began to bulge out. On the box it said not "X-Box" but "Sex Box."
"Er… something wrong, Nick?"
Phoenix quickly broke out of his trance. "Maya, you know we need games-"
Maya cut him off. "Oh, I got one with it!" She brought a game out of her pocket. "It says 'Bishoujo.' I wonder what that means."
Phoenix quickly snatched the game away from her. "Um… you can't play that, Maya!"
Maya immediately got irritated. "Why not?"
Phoenix desperately tried to think of a plausible explanation. "Because… it's not multiplayer! You should go back to the store you bought this from and get… that new Steel Samurai game!" When Maya's eyes lit up, he added "With your OWN money."
Maya left the offices pouting. "Back to Wal-Mart, then…"
("You got this at Wal-Mart?!)
Phoenix sat down. He couldn't believe that Maya had gotten an adults-only console! But it was Maya.
But that meant he could use this for stress… Phoenix was grinning evilly until he thought about the number of people who came to his office, and his face fell. Sometimes he wished he had less friends.
So, where to hide it? It would be perfect for Larry, but Phoenix hadn't seen him in two years, and he needed a place to hide it now. Then he looked at the date, and got an idea.
High Prosecutor's Office
Room 1202
10:21 A.M.
"Happy birthday, Mr. Edgeworth!" said Detective Gumshoe gleefully, and threw confetti on him. Edgeworth was not pleased.
"Detective, I am trying to do work! Confetti does not help me!"
"Well, Mr. Edgeworth, what about your gift, sir?" He pointed to a somewhat messily wrapped present on the edge of the desk.
"Detective, I absolutely LOATHE presents."
"I-I know that sir. That's for Pesu, sir. Didn't you get him on your birthday? That makes today his birthday too, in a way."
Edgeworth immediately opened the present. It had two new cravats in them. He looked suspiciously towards Gumshoe. "I thought you might change your mind, sir, so I bought two…." He was then hugged by Edgeworth.
"Wonderful gift, Detective.
A hug from Mr. Edgeworth! Gumshoe could die happy now.
"HOLD IT!" Edgeworth and Gumshoe fell out of their chairs.
"Wright, haven't you ever heard of knocking!?"
"Yeah, pal! It's Mr. Edgeworth's birthday, you know!"
"I know that, Detective!" said Phoenix. "That's why I came. And I made a much better entrance than 'Hiya!' if I do say so myself."
Edgeworth groaned. "What is it, Wright?"
Phoenix grinned. "I came to give you a gift, Edgeworth! Happy Birthday!" He laid the box on the desk. Since it covered most of his work, Edgeworth had no choice but to open it. When he undid part of the of the wrapping, his eyes bulged out.
"Oh," Phoenix added. "A game came with it too." He handed Edgeworth the bishoujo game.
"Mr. Edgeworth? Something wrong, sir?"
Edgeworth gave Wright a hug, much, much tighter than the one Gumshoe received. He whispered in Wright's ear "Thank you. You are my best friend. And my only one." The prosecutor grabbed the box and ran home. Both Phoenix and Detective Gumshoe saw Edgeworth's bright red sport car go at 100 miles an hour, racing towards home.
"…So, what did Mr. Edgeworth say to you, pal?" asked the detective, jealous that Phoenix's hug was bigger than his.
Phoenix didn't regard Gumshoe at first. How would he explain this to Maya, who just won this, thinking it was an X-Box? Then, he had an idea.
"Edgeworth told me to have you… lend me $300."
END
