He sometimes feels like he's going to scream.
And if does, he never talks about it.
There's no point in dwelling on the past, he knows that perfectly well. Learned it the hard way, mind you.
Easier said than done.
So rather than admitting the truth, he lies to them. He lets them say words like 'forever' and 'always' and 'I love you' and doesn't say them back because they would feel bitter on his tongue.
He might have forever but not with them.
So rather than admitting the truth, he lies to himself. He runs, he hides, tries to forget, he pretends to live, pretends to feel something, anything else but pain and misery.
Does it ever work? He tends to wonder.
And if he slips sometimes, crosses the line… well, that happens, right? Doesn't need to make big fuss about it.
After all… in the end it all means nothing.
Perhaps if he keeps repeating that to himself, it might actually become true one day. It has to, he promises.
And than breaks it because nothing ever changes.
That's his biggest lie.