A/N: ...What have I done now?

Rated T largely for the language of some BlazBlue characters.

January 4

10:05 AM

Wright & Co. Law Offices

At a young girl's command, space warped and tore itself apart within the confines of an office. It raveled back into oblivion, leaving behind a hole tall enough for a person to step through, a doorway to another world. And sure enough, someone did step through, a young girl in a midnight black dress embroidered by scarlet crosses. Her long twin ponytails swayed as she glanced about her environs with a light frown. Behind her, two more figures followed her entrance; a large black cat and a chubby red bat. With a sigh, the girl shook her head. "It would seem I miscalculated. We are not where we should be."

Across from her, seated in a chair, a blue-suited man with his dark hair spiked back stared with numbed stupefaction, a newspaper slipping from his hands. It was as though his entire brain had locked up. Finally, Phoenix Wright managed a blink before finding some semblance of his voice. "Um…who…?"

"Oh. My apologies." The girl's crimson gaze fell upon him. "I am Rachel Alucard. I do believe I have ended up quite far from my destination. Might I ask where I am?"

"Oh…um…" Rachel's words cut away most of Phoenix's daze, although he still could not make the slightest bit of sense of this situation. Still…ended up in the wrong place? Shouldn't that not be a problem when apparent teleportation is involved? "You're at Wright and Co. Law Offices. Um…maybe I could help you find your way…?" Pretty doubtful, that.

"Oh, no, I shall manage on my own, thank you very much. However…" Rachel's piercing gaze met his. "You claim this to be a law office? Are you, by chance, an attorney, then?"

"P-princess!" The cat at her feet spoke up in a deep baritone and Phoenix jumped at the sound. "You don't mean to…?"

"Indeed I do. Miss Vermillion has quite the predicament on her hands, and our little detour may cost her if that loud woman is not up to the task, as I suspect. Although this man may not look like much, he may be her only hope, admittedly due to my miscalculation."

…Did she just insult him out of the blue? "Um…yes, I am. Attorney Phoenix Wright." After a moment to consider both the girl's disposition and his own sanity, Phoenix extended a hand. "You're…looking for a defense attorney?"

"Indeed, I am. An…acquaintance of mine has been wrongfully accused of murder, and I have little faith in her current attorney. In fact, I would not surprise if the trial, embryo of one though it is at this point, is all but over due to her temper." Rachel accepted the handshake, her cold palm sending a shiver through Phoenix. "Mr. Wright. In the event that Miss Bullet has been proven incompetent in her field of work, would you be willing to defend Miss Noel Vermillion?"

…Well, it had been a while since his last case, and bills did need to be paid… Phoenix sighed. This was madness. With any luck, all of this was just a dream. But in the off-chance it wasn't… "Yes, I will. You said the trial's already in progress?"

"Indeed." The wormhole ripped open behind Rachel once more and she gestured to it. "Well then. Come along, Mr. Wright."

"Wait a minute." Phoenix stalled up just before taking a step toward the portal. What about Maya? The girl was out shopping at the moment; she needed to at least know what was going on. "I can't just leave her behind here. She's out shopping right now, and…"

"I understand. Once you have been cemented as Miss Vermillion's defense, I shall return here for her." Rachel entered the portal, tailed by her familiars. "Now, do hurry. We do not have time to waste."

January 4

10:10 AM

District Court

13th Hierarchical City, Kagutsuchi

Phoenix stumbled out of the portal, stomach churning from being thrust through time and space by whatever witchcraft this Rachel possessed—he could see no other explanation for the wormhole than magic. And when he glanced around the hallway he had appeared in, 'magic' was the only word that came to mind for it as well. No bulbs or anything of the sort lit the corridor, but rather runes glowed over otherwise empty lanterns and bathed the room in light.

He did get any chance to take in the scenery before a door at the far end burst open and a white-haired girl stormed out, yelling something about idiotic loud ninjas. Phoenix cocked an eye at her as she passed—how was she permitted into the courtroom in such scanty attire?—and turned to Rachel. "Was that…?"

"Indeed, it would seem Miss Vermillion's defense has submitted already." Rachel's eyes narrowed and Phoenix could have sworn he heard the buzz of electricity around her fingertips. "Now, stop dawdling, lest you wish for an early verdict to be handed down upon your client."

"R-right." Because he did not want to cross someone who could rip holes in space and apparently summon electricity with her fingers. Phoenix hurried on ahead; as he drew near the door, he heard a voice, low and run through a mechanical filter. "…defense attorney, I shall now pass judgment. Girl of the Azure, I find you—"

"Hold it!" Phoenix threw the doors open and stepped inside. "Your Honor, I'd…"

…That was the judge? A man in a suit of white armor, face covered by a blank mask? How could he see? …Unless those red eyes that dotted the armor weren't for show, of course. "I'd like to defend the…um…defendant."

"…A defense attorney?" The judge turned his blank stare upon Phoenix, who blanched as he realized that the white handle that stuck up from the judge's back looked all too much like a sword hilt. "Do not waste my time. Make your decision now; defend her, or defend your honor!" And with a metallic screech that made Phoenix's stomach churn yet again, the judge drew the sword, seven feet of steel now pointed at Phoenix.

If there ever was a time for Phoenix to faint, that would have been it. However, in spite of his blanch, his quiver, he stepped forward and nodded. "Th-then I will defend Miss Vermillion."

"Very well." The sword, quite mercifully, slid back into its sheath. "Your name?"

"Phoenix Wright, Your Honor."

"Are you familiar with the facts of this case?"

"Um…" With a sheepish grin, Phoenix rubbed the back of his head. No, of course he was not. Kind of hard to defend someone like that. He took a moment to scan the courtroom. That blonde girl beside his stand had to be the defendant, judging by the telltale tear streaks on her cheeks. And straight across from him…

Judging by the fleeing defense attorney and the wild-haired prosecutor staring him down with a burning gaze, clothes clearly were not a prerequisite for this courthouse. Turning away from the bare-chested man, and hoping the pungent stench of sweat emanating from his direction was just imagination, Phoenix shook his head. "I'm sorry, could I request a brief recess to look over the facts?"

"Hah! Do not fall for his manipulations, honorable Judge Hakumen!" The prosecutor jabbed a finger in Phoenix's direction. "You know the defendant is the highest level of evil! Hand down your sentence and be done with it!"

It was all Phoenix could do to not bury his face in a palm. "And you are?"

"You've not heard of me? So be it!" The prosecutor grinned, his fists on his hips. "Quicker than the wind, and as still as a forest! Hotter than a flame, and more magnificent than a mountain! I am the hero of love and justice, the ace prosecution ninja Bang Shishigami! Try as you might, evildoer, your efforts to save this villain will be for naught!"

Phoenix stared, deadpan, at Bang. That had to be the most appropriate name ever. "…Right."

"Objection overruled." Hakumen rose and slammed the hilt of his sword down against the table. "I declare a thirty minute recess for our new defense to find his bearings. Make the most of it."

Phoenix sighed as he read through the court record. Brief, to the point and entirely lacking in evidence. And, as expected, none of the evidence helped him, at least at first glance. Oh, and there was the little matter of not knowing the laws of this country…wherever he was. But then, this such seemingly impregnable obstacles were rote at this point. Right then. Might as well have a look at the autopsy report…

"Oh, thank you!" A concussive blast of sound was Phoenix's only warning before someone tackled him to the ground and grabbed him in a tight embrace. Judging by the mass of blonde hair obscuring his vision, it would seem that the defendant had tracked him down. "When…when Miss Bullet stormed out of the room, I thought it was all over…but you…"

"Um…yes." After a few moments of struggling to free himself of Noel's iron grip—Pearls would kill him if she saw this—Phoenix sighed and gave up. "You're…Noel Vermillion, right?"

"Y-yes, that's right." After finally releasing Phoenix, Noel stood back up, happy tears brimming in her eyes. "Ohh, how could I ever thank you enough, Mr. Wright?"

Not squeezing him to death would be a good start. "Save it for when I get you acquitted. Now, um…" Phoenix paused as he stood up, wondering just how much Noel knew about the case. Or, more specifically, the evidence. A pair of cookies, a baking sheet, a letter and a photo. "Could you tell me anything about these cookies?"

"Eh? Oh…" With a sigh, Noel looked down and shook her head. "I'm sorry…I don't know much about the evidence. That loud man presented most of it…"

"Alright. And don't worry about it." After throwing her a reassuring smile, Phoenix looked through the evidence. First things first, the autopsy report. "Hmm…victim, Litchi Faye-Ling. Cause of death, poisoning at 9:15 AM in her own home. Death was nearly instantaneous. Received a pair of cookies and a letter from Noel Vermillion…"

"I-I didn't do it! I swear!" Noel looked up, eyes wide and pleading. "You…you believe me, right?"

"Yes, I do." If mostly because he couldn't see this girl ever killing anybody. Phoenix continued with his summary. "One of the cookies is half eaten and is the probable murder…'weapon'. The letter is addressed from Miss Vermillion to Miss Faye-Ling…"

"I didn't write it!"

"…Thanking Miss Faye-Ling for her help." Phoenix looked up at Noel, face grim. "Did you know the victim?"

"N-not really…I stopped in her clinic once or twice, but never really got to know her…"

"I see." No motives offhand; a good start. "A baking sheet was found at the defendant's home…"

"I…um…" Noel looked away, trembling. "I don't have a home here, actually…I'm staying in a hotel at the moment."

"Mm…" Note to self: ask about that discrepancy. True, 'home' may well have meant Noel's hotel, but Phoenix had to make sure of that. "The baking sheet had a half dozen of the same kind of cookies still on it. Miss Faye-Ling was found by an assistant minutes after her death, and the assistant took a photo of the scene."

He glanced at the photo. A woman slumped over a table, a perfume bottle and a plate with the two cookies resting beside her. Nothing out of the ordinary. With a sigh, Phoenix looked back up at Noel. "There don't seem to be any testimonies here. Did Bang ever call anyone to the stand?"

"N-no…" Again, Noel averted her gaze. "Mister Bang and Miss Bullet just…kind of yelled at each other for about ten minutes before Miss Bullet left."

Phoenix stared in complete deadpan at her. Why did that not surprise him in the least? Well, that was all he needed for now. Now to just wait for court to reconvene.

January 4

10:42 AM

District Court

Courtroom #13

"The trial of Noel Vermillion will now resume." Hakumen sat still as a statue, his blank face directed at no one particular. "Are you prepared for your pursuit of justice now?"

"I…um…yes. Yes, I am." Well, that was certainly one way to describe it. Phoenix turned to Bang and again felt the force of repugnant stench strike him. After a few moments, Phoenix blinked. "Well? Is the prosecution ready?"

"Of course I am! I, Bang Shishigami, am always ready!" Bang directed his fierce gaze upon Noel, who squeaked and shrunk behind the stand. "This heartless killer is clearly guilty of murdering the fair Miss Litchi! The prosecution rests."

Slumped over, a pained grimace on his face, it was all Phoenix could do to muster up his voice. "…That's your entire case?"

"Indeed."

With a shake of his head, Phoenix straightened back up. "Well, I'm afraid the defense can't accept that. Where's your evidence that Miss Vermillion committed the murder?"

"Evidence? Bah!" Bang slammed a fist on his stand, a glint in his eyes. "Who needs evidence? As I hero, I must be able to detect when one is wicked, and I can feel the evil radiating off of that man. That is all the evidence I need right there!"

Stunned silence followed. Stuttering came from behind the defendant stand as Noel found her voice first. "M-m-MAN?!"

"Yes. Is there a problem?"

"…" All Phoenix could do for several long moments was stare at Bang and contemplate how he could possibly think Noel was a man. "…Actually, Noel is female."

"Objection!" Bang pointed at Noel. Or, more specifically, at her chest. "You, sir, are quite insulting, insinuating Noel cannot be a man! The facts are right before your eyes!"

A shrill whistle of a squeak, like steam escaping, came from Noel and she collapsed to her knees behind the defendant's stand.

"Enough of this foolishness." Hakumen drew his sword out the slightest bit. "Is the prosecution prepared to call its first witness?"

Bang barked out a laugh, arms crossed. "I see no reason for that. This trial has dragged on long enough. I, Bang Shishigami, shall end this right now!" He stabbed a finger at Noel. "Admit it, Noel Vermillion! You killed the fair Miss Litchi in cold blood, didn't you?"

With a whimper, Noel poked her head up from behind the stand. "…No…?"

"Hah! Why the uncertainty?" Bang's grin softened, a friendly expression to coax her. "Come now, Mister Ver-"

"Miss Vermillion!" Noel jumped to her feet, face cherry red with embarrassment. "Please stop calling me a man!"

"…My apologies." Finally dropping his intensity completely, Bang rubbed his chin. "But in turn, please, just confess to your crime. If you just do that, I could seek a lighter punishment."

"But…" The display of spine evaporating in instant, Noel looked down. "But I didn't do it…ohh, why would you think I did?"

"Shishigami." The judge's massive blade slid out from its sheath and Hakumen pointed it at Bang. "No matter the strength of your convictions, simply declaring the defendant guilty carries no weight. Evidence is all that matters in the court of law. Call your first witness, or I shall find you guilty of obstruction."

"R-right!" As he stumbled back away from the gleaming sword, Bang cast a frantic glance to the entrance to the courtroom. "I…um…I, Bang Shishigami, call the poor young woman who discovered the scene of the crime!"

As the doors opened and a young girl with tan skin followed the bailiff to the witness stand, Phoenix suppressed a sigh. Here it came. Some way or another, the truth would emerge from these testimonies. If Noel was innocent, the proof would be presented now.

Once the girl reached the podium, Hakumen turned to her, sword sheathed. "Your name and occupation."

"Um…my name's Linhua." The girl at the stand fidgeted with her white and blue shirt, unable to look up. "I…was Doctor Faye-Ling's assistant at her clinic, Your Honor."

"Very well. Proceed with your testimony." And once more, the overlong sword slid from its sheathe to scare whoever Hakumen was talking to witless. "Just know that lies are the highest sin in these halls of justice."

"Eep! Right, right!" Bleached of color and trembling, Linhua took a deep breath to calm her nerves. "It was just a little past 9 in the morning. I was cleaning in another room when I heard a door shut in the kitchen. I…I went to check on Litchi…and she…"

She fell silent, light sobs wracking her body. After a few moments, Hakumen turned to Phoenix. "Very well. Begin your cross-examination, Wright."

No sooner had Hakumen's instruction come than a balding, spectacled man all but appeared at Phoenix's side and handed him a paper. Phoenix glanced it over; a written transcript of the testimony. Perfect. "Very well. I'm sorry, miss Linhua, but I do have one question about your testimony."

"Huh?" Linhua looked up, wiping her eyes. "O-okay."

"You said that you checked on Litchi when you heard a door, right?" Phoenix rubbed his chin. "Why? Shouldn't something like that be normal?"

"Oh! Well, it's just that Doctor Litchi didn't say anything about going anywhere that morning, and I didn't hear anyone knocking."

"Hmm…" In contemplation, Phoenix closed his eyes. One more question, but nothing about this testimony seemed wrong. "And you would be able to hear a knock in the kitchen from where you were?"

"Yes. I was in the adjacent bedroom at the time, and the walls in the clinic are pretty thin. We have to be able to hear a knock from anywhere in the clinic in case a patient comes by, after all."

"Alright. That makes sense." Phoenix barely suppressed a sigh. This was not a question he wanted to ask Linhua in her state, but…well, he needed to. "I'm sorry for asking this, Linhua, but could you describe the scene of the crime for me, please? As detailed as you can, if you don't mind."

"You heartless monster! How dare you ask her to recall such a scene?" Bang jabbed a finger at Phoenix, yellow-brown eyes ablaze as he shouted. "She is but a young girl, reeling from the loss of her maternal figure! I demand this vile badgering of the witness cease!"

"Tell me, Wright." Hakumen's steely rasp sent shivers down Phoenix's back. "Is this important? If you go through with this and this yields nothing, you will find yourself at my judgment."

And suddenly, Phoenix longed for the old judge. Senile though he may have been, that was infinitely superior to constant threats of being cleaved in half by that sword. Still, he had to stand firm now that he had come this far. "Yes, Your Honor, I believe a description of what the victim saw would be quite important."

"It's…it's fine, Your Honor." Linhua stared up at Hakumen, tears still budding at the corner of her eyes but otherwise with a resolute face. "When I looked in, I saw Doctor Litchi slumped over the table. Um, there was a glass of water and a plate of cookies on the table. I guess Doctor Litchi was eating when…when she…"

Linhua trailed off and looked down, leaving Phoenix to sigh. That was as much as he was going to get out of her testimony it seemed. However, something in that testimony… Phoenix steeled himself for reprimand. "Thank you, Linhua. However…could you just answer—"

"Does your evil know no bounds?" Bang slammed a gauntleted fist against his table, snarling. "Have you not caused the poor Miss Linhua enough distress with this horrible excuse for defense? I, Bang Shishigami, will not stand for this! Your Honor, declare that vile…person in the defendant's chair guilty so we may spare Linhua of these despicable assaults!"

"Overruled." Still, Hakumen's hand rested on his sword as he stared Phoenix down, a blank glare that left Phoenix's knees wobbly from fear. "Remember my warning, however, Wright."

"…Alright." Leaning forward, Phoenix's stare sharpened on Linhua. There had been something else at the crime scene… "Was there anything else at the crime scene?"

Linhua gasped, her memory jogged. "Oh, sorry! Yes, there was. There was a letter from the defendant beside the plate."

…What? It was all Phoenix could do to not shout that. But still, he had his hole in the testimony now. "I'm sorry, Miss Linhua, but according to the photo you yourself took…" Phoenix paused right there. Why would Linhua's response to seeing her mentor's corpse be to photograph it? But no, that could wait for now. "…Your testimony is impossible! Your Honor, if you could present the photo of the crime scene, please."

"Very well." Hakumen gestured to the blond-haired bailiff at his side, he scrounged through the table and drew out the photograph. In the center of the courtroom, close to the attorneys but still in a position where most of the gallery could see, a white sheet descended from the ceiling. The photo projected onto it. Hakumen stiffened as he gazed on it. "…Witness. Explain why there is no letter shown in this photo, given that you took it."

"What's more…" Phoenix walked over to the sheet and pointed at the bottle on the table. "Could you explain this bottle as well? And while you're at it…why did you take this photo in the first place? That strikes me as a strange reaction to seeing your mentor dead."

"This is madness." Bang growled and fire sparked for a moment from his gauntlets. "I, Bang Shishigami, the defender of the downtrodden and weak, will not stand for this witchhunt! I demand both of you stop this instant!"

"Sorry, Shishigami." Phoenix jabbed his finger in Bang's direction. "But even you can't deny the facts here! Witness, please explain."

"…Yes, sir." Although she had been shocked mute by the reveal of the photo, Linhua found her wits and nodded. "I'm sorry for the mistake. I…guess that the letter wasn't there when I first came to the scene. I…took the picture because I thought that…well, if this was a murder, then I should at least be able to show what I saw. Then I went to the living room to call the police and…stayed there until they arrived. But I promise that there was a letter on the table! It's still there right now!"

"Hmm…" Phoenix closed his eyes to think. "…If that's to be believed—"

"Allow me to erase all doubt!" Bang drew out a paper, crumpled and torn, from a pocket and approached Hakumen to hand it over. "The first detective on the site, Captain Hazama, described the scene in…this…"

The muscle-bound man withered under Hakumen's scrutiny. Even though his face was as empty as ever, it was as though light itself bended to his anger to shade the mask with fury. "This is unacceptable treatment of evidence, Shishigami. The court will accept it, but know that a severe penalty awaits should you choose to mistreat evidence in such a way again."

"…Y-yes, sir."

After snatching the paper from Bang and unfolding it, Hakumen glared with even more intensity at him. "This report has been torn in half."

"S-sorry, sir."

"…Return to your stand, unless you wish to test my wrath." As Bang scampered away—and Phoenix wondered if he could win this case just by exploiting the man's idiocy—Hakumen read the damaged report. "It would seem that this report confirms the witness's testimony. A letter was on the table at the time, and there was no bottle."

Phoenix nodded. Not particularly surprising, but it meant far too much. A tingle crept down his spine. "Then there can only be one explanation—"

"Indeed there can, you sham of an attorney!" Once more, Bang jabbed a finger at Phoenix. "You slaved all night long, editing this photograph to suit your nefarious plot to allow a heartless murderer roam free! You may fool the judge, the witness, and everyone else present, but you cannot trick the hero of love and justice, Bang Shishigami!"

By the time that Bang finished, Phoenix had his forehead clutched in a palm, from both exasperation and pain. Did this man win trials just by yelling until the defense couldn't stand him anymore? He was certainly finding it more difficult to fault the previous defense attorney for storming out now. "I have been on this case for an hour. I haven't had the time to photoshop anything."

Bang visibly deflated at being served hard truth. "…Right. My apologies, Wright."

"Anyways." Phoenix straightened up, his forehead a light red. "There can only be one conclusion to be drawn from the conflicting photograph and report." He jabbed a finger Hakumen's way. "The scene of the crime was tampered with, Your Honor!"

"To implicate our defendant, it would seem." Hakumen nodded. "However, this alone is by no means evidence enough to acquit the Girl of the Azure."

"Uhm…" Phoenix blinked, slumped with confusion. "…Girl of the Azure…?"

"I refer to Miss Vermillion, of course." Hakumen turned to Linhua, although by this point, Phoenix strongly doubted that it mattered where his mask pointed. "Is that all, witness?"

With a sharp nod, Linhua started to step away from the stand. "Yes, Your Honor. Unless the defense has any more questions for me."

Phoenix considered a moment. "Just one. Do you have any idea where that bottle in your photograph went to?"

"I'm sorry." Linhua shook her head, lips pursed into a grimace. "I've never seen it before."

…Well, now. That bottle just got a bit more intriguing. Phoenix nodded once. "The defense has no further questions for the witness."

"Very well. The witness may take her leave." Hakumen turned to Bang as Linhua headed for the exit of the courtroom. "Shishigami, are you prepared to call your next witness?"

"Indeed I am." Wearing a cocky grin, Bang crossed his arms. "With this witness, I intend to forge a connection between the beautiful Miss Litchi and our cowardly murderer on the defendant stand! I call…"

He trailed off as the doors boomed open once more and Rachel stepped through, tailed by a young woman. Phoenix held in his gasp; he could recognize that white and purple clothing, the bead necklace with the talisman at the fore, and the knotted black hair anywhere. The entire courtroom fell silent as Rachel strode up to Hakumen. "Good day, Mr. Hero. I do hope you can pardon the interruption."

"You." Hakumen's hand crept up to his sword. "What do you want, unholy?"

"I am merely here to bring Mr. Wright his partner, as per his request. I assume that's permissible." Rachel turned to Phoenix and smiled. "It would seem you are performing quite well thus far."

And with that, Rachel created a hole in the middle of the courtroom and left through it. No sooner had she left than the girl who had followed her in rushed over to Phoenix. "Nick! What's…what's going on?"

"Maya! Um…" Phoenix rubbed the back of his head and glanced away nervously. "Sorry for leaving you like that…"

"A case?" Maya huffed and crossed her arms. "You're working on a case, and you didn't…" Her attention caught on Hakumen and her eyes widened. "Oh! Is…is he supposed to be a rebooted Steel Samurai or something?"

"Do not insult me, miss." Hakumen stood up to full height and glowered down her. "I am the white void. I am the cold steel. I am the just sword. With blade in hand shall I reap the evils of this world and purge them in the fires of destruction! I am Hakumen! The end…has yet to come."

"Ah…" Maya stared up at him, sparkles in her eyes and hands clasped together. "…So awesome…"

Phoenix sighed and slumped over. "Maya, that's the judge. And he's not awesome, he's terrifying."

"Enough delay." Hakumen sat back down. "Who exactly are you?"

"Oh, sorry, Mister Hakumen. My name's Maya Fey." Maya came around to Phoenix's side. "I'm Nick's assistant."

"Hmm…I suppose this is acceptable." With that, Hakumen turned back to Bang. "Now. The prosecution will call its next witness."

"Indeed it will!" Bang leapt up and pointed at…no one in particular. "I call to the stand Kokonoe, a scientist with the group known as Sector Seven!"

He grinned. "And someone who knows quite well…the relationship between Miss Litchi and that boy over there!"

Noel squeaked. "Stop calling me a boy!"

A/N: Right. So my mind did something stupid while playing Phoenix Wright, and now this is a thing. This chapter was originally planned to be a fair bit longer, until I realized it was getting fairly lengthy as is, and that I was nowhere near finished with what I had planned for it.

And just a little update for those who follow my BB works: everything except for Confinement and AFH should be updating in the next month, if not the next couple weeks.

And don't expect anything in the way of shipping here.