Chapter 1

I finally made it to my final year in High School. I, a senior of 17 years of age, have finally reached my final year being tied down by the little King known as Hitori Tadase-kun. My elementary crush who I have lost interest since I started Junior High so many years before, right after... Ikuto left...

Not seeing him for so long was difficult. I get occasional texts from him here and there, telling me how his music tour around the world is going with the orchestra, and how much he misses me. But the texting stopped 2 years ago. I usually wasn't the one who texted him, but I got concerned. I never got a reply. I assumed that he might have moved on with someone he met during his travels.

I have told Tadase about it, and he seemed more worried about me. He took the advantage of me grieving over Ikuto by trying to get me to fall in love with him again. He started saying those three little words again after so long of not hearing it... "I love you..." but I never said them back. I was afraid to be drawn back into the mistake I made a long time ago.

I pretend to smile when I'm with Tadase-kun, pretending to be his little girlfriend until I graduate and leave him forever. I try to fake blush a bit whenever he blurts out those words again and whenever he touches me. But I never mean it. I would never fall for him again.

Or so I thought...

It was coming close to a major exam that was 3 weeks before summer break and I needed to study like hell if I wanted to graduate by the end of the year. Tadase-kun invited me to his place for some studying. I didn't want to go, but I realized that he wasn't gonna try anything because he's too sweet and innocent to try anything.

Summer vacation was soon, but the heat was already here. I could hear the cicadas buzzing everywhere. Getting to Tadase-kun's place wasn't difficult at least. It was just as big as I remembered since the last time I was here, which felt like a thousand years ago...

We couldn't study in his room because it was too small, so we took over the living room.

"Do you want some Tea Amu-chan?" he asked.

"Um...sure..." I hesitated for a moment because I wasn't paying attention.

After he brought some tea and cookies, we started studying. We sat down by the table on the floor. he was at least 90 degrees away from me. It didn't take me long to realize that we were the only ones here. I couldn't hold back my curiosity.

"Where is your family?" I asked.

"Father is working, and mother is with grandmother shopping..." he didn't take his eyes off from his notes.

"Oh..." I was hoping for some supervision...

Not even 20mins into our silent studying, I was already having trouble with some of my math. It was one of my hardest subjects to deal with in school.

"Something wrong?" he asked.

I jumped a little since I was so deep in thought about the problem that I forgot that he was there. Plus he broke the silence and hearing him all of a sudden scared me.

"...Uh... I'm just having trouble with this problem." I pointed where I was having trouble. He leaned closer to me to get a better view.

"Ah yes... You just do this annnnd...there. Do you get it now?"

"Oh wow! Now I do! Thanks."

I didn't realize how happy I was, because I ended up hugging him real hard. He seemed hesitant when I did it too, but he hugged me back. Then I noticed that he wasn't letting me go.

"Um... Tadase-kun? You can let go of me now..." but he didn't.

I tried to push him off but he was surprisingly strong. Then I see his face below my chest staring at me. I looked so desperate, but he also looked like he wanted something... Then he looked at my chest.

"...I never realized how much bigger these got..." he blurted.

"Huh?" and before I knew it, he buried his face into my boobs.

He was moving his head back and forth in a 180 degree stroke. His nose, brushing against my breast, and his hair was tickling my chest. I think they called it motor boating... I couldn't help but let out a small moan from the sensitivity.

"Amu-chan... I love you... I want you..."

"Why are you doing this?! This isn't you!" I screamed from the minor pleasure.

He stopped moving his head and placed one hand on one of my boobs while the other hand was still locked around me, and proceeded by squeezing my boob hard. I let out a loud moan. I tried covering my mouth, but I couldn't contain the noise.

"I can't help it... The drug...it's..." he responded.

"Drug?!" I questioned.

"Kukai-san...gave me a pill... Said that it would help me...become more of a man..." he was breathing fast, like he wouldn't to hold back anymore.

Kukai... Last I heard of him, he was in his rebellious phase where he had a certain kind of confidence, where it got him into trouble. He started going out with girls more after he dumped Utau because she was too busy with her career for him. And I think he did more than just 'going out' with those other girls... He musta felt bad for Tadase-kun when he couldn't become someone like Kukai, thinking he'll never have me unless he used force. Like Ikuto use to do... Was he trying to be like Ikuto? Tadase-kun was jealous of him for making the first move to kiss me...

Tadase-kun was starting to go crazy, like he was about to blackout and let his animal instincts take over. After about a few minutes of groping my chest, he took the bottom part of my shirt and lifted it over my boobs, revealing my bare abdomen. He unclipped my bra and started groping some more. I couldn't move. I was pinned to the floor at that point moaning from his strong delicate fingers all over my chest. It felt so much more different than when my shirt and bra were on. One of his knees made its way in between my legs. It was so sensitive there that I couldn't help but feel weird and good at the same time.

My body couldn't hold back. I wanted it to stop, but my body wanted more than this. My head was spinning from all the blood in my face. I felt embarrassed with him seeing my chest and hearing my embarrassing moans.

I could feel his lips wrap around my nipples, licking...sucking... It was painful a little, but it sent this nerve down in between my legs. I didn't know what to do. I tried thinking about how I was getting myself outta this. But it was hopeless... I was consumed by overwhelming pleasure and I couldn't control my emotions and my body.

I wrapped my arms around his frail body, clenching my fingers into his shirt. One of his hands found its way to my pussy. He lifted my skirt and started rubbing my pussy, back and forth, side to side, in and out. It was much harder to hold back at this point. He stopped for a moment and looked at me.

"Amu-chan... You're very...wet..." he said chuckling.

I let go of his non-masculine body and placed my hands over my face to hide from embarrassment. I couldn't believe that words such as those came out from his mouth. I didn't like this side of Tadase-kun's, but the fact that it's something that would come from Ikuto's mouth, made it more exciting. But Tadase-kun isn't Ikuto, I knew that. But it's been so long since I had the "bad-boy" feel all over me. It's a craving-a longing for such attention that I hate myself for developing.

"Look at me..." he whispered into my ear, sending chills down my spine.

I didn't move. But he did. I could hear what sound like a belt coming off and possibly something else coming off. Then he took both of my hands away from my face and pinned them to the floor, with my legs over his thighs. My eyes were still firmly closed, but my sense of feeling was making me curious. I could feel something warm, soft but rough, touching the outside part of my panties. It was touching such a sensitive part of me, where his fingers were before.

"Today...we are becoming adults...as one..." he said so proud.

I couldn't help my curiosity and looked at where the poking was. And there it was...his...penis... I never saw one before. I've only heard about it around high school and my parents when I matured. I never thought the first one I would see would be Tadase-kun's... I started to panic. I didn't want this! I wanted to scream!

"We're home!" someone called out from the front door.

It sounded like his mother. I could see Tadase-kun's face go pale and he immediately put his pants back on. I rush as well to look proper and I grabbed my things.

"Hey there sweetie." his mom greeting when she came into the room.

"H-hey mother..." his nose was in the textbook, pretending that nothing happened before. I took the chance to leave.

"Hinamori-san? Are you leaving? Aren't you suppose to study?" his mom asked.

"We did, and I was told by my mother to be home by lunch." I didn't look into her eyes because I was afraid that she might see that I'm lying.

"Oh...ok. Tell her I say hi and have a nice day." she bought it.

"I will, thank you." and then briskly left.

I didn't say bye to Tadase-kun. I didn't even wanna look at him after the things he did to me... I just wanted to go home and sleep...if I even can...