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Disclaimer: Not mine. Never mine.
Author's Note: This story is based on a plot-bunny that hasn't left me alone since The Time of Angels. I've seen the premise done before, recently... but this is a new way of looking at the same idea. Set between Amy's Choice and The Hungry Earth, because while I laugh in malicious glee at the pain of the fangirls... I did like Rory.
Summary: The Doctor stumbles across an old friend. Spoilers for everything up to and including Cold Blood.
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It wasn't life-threatening... just highly inconvenient. The Doctor did quite entirely detest hospitals, with all his hearts.
"I told her not to touch it." the Doctor muttered.
Rory glared down at him, where he sat. The human was standing, arms folded, only barely resisting the urge to pace, while the Doctor sat calmly on the chair in the waiting room. "What exactly was it, anyway?" Rory asked defensively.
"Just a mildly toxic plant... with teeth." the Doctor said, shrugging vaguely, "I could have dealt with it on the TARDIS, but we seemed to be all out of anti-venom. Serve me right for not restocking, really. She'll be fine."
"She better be." Rory grumbled.
The Doctor turned his head slowly, to look up at him, and asked sceptically, "Or what?"
"Or I'll..." Rory hesitated, trying to think of something. The Doctor just stared up at him blankly. "I'll..."
The Doctor shook his head, "You'll not need to waste time thinking about it." he dismissed, turning his attention back to the door through which the medical staff had taken Amy, "She will be fine. It's not even fatal untreated. Just a bit... unpleasant."
Then something began to itch at the back of his mind. He looked around, seeing nothing strange. Rory hadn't noticed it, so it probably wasn't a psychic field resonance... when one of those irritated a Time Lord it would cause shrieking hallucinations in a human.
He stood up slowly, reaching out with his mind, to find the source of the irritation.
"Where're you going now?" Rory demanded.
The Doctor waved him off, "Just checking something, you stay here. Wait for Amy." he glanced at the human, "Yeah?"
Rory scowled, but nodded slowly, "Fine." he said unhappily.
Not one to defer to orders well... never really had been. Probably part of the reason the Doctor was gradually growing to like him.
The Doctor walked slowly down the hallway, and the sense of irritation grew. Like a paper-cut in time, a slightly stingy itch that he couldn't quite put his finger on. And the closer he got the more familiar it felt.
He stopped outside a door, and there the realisation hit, like a slap to the face.
"Oh, it's him." the Doctor muttered, looking around. He considered fleeing, but between past experience, and the fact Rory was staring at him from the far end of the corridor... no, definitely not going to show weakness now.
He pushed the door open, and found himself in a brightly lit, stark white room. Another door off to the side, and that's where the wrongness was coming from.
"Zev, check that!" a familiar voice ordered, "I specifically told them I wanted complete privacy!"
He sounded slightly hoarse, but there was no mistaking that strong American accent, even if the Doctor hadn't sensed who it was before now.
The Doctor stopped short, however, when a white-plastic-finished robot step out of the door to the other room. It had a pretty- and surprisingly realistic- feminine shape to its moulded face, and unlike most medical robots it was entirely humanoid in form. It was even wearing clothing, including a white coat similar to that which the Doctor had seen on the hospital staff around here.
This wasn't your run-of-the-mill 'droid. It was a custom-build, probably even artisan-crafted. But then, the Doctor knew the man in the next room would never settle for less if he could afford it.
A smooth gender-neutral voice emanated from the construct. "This is a restricted area. I'm going to have to ask you to leave."
Though, once more unlike the standard-issue robot, its eyes held a steady green light, instead of wavering with its voice modulator. The Doctor found that tiny detail immensely comforting, and took an instant liking to the robot the moment it spoke.
"Tell him the Doctor wants to speak to him." he said amicably, nodding to the door behind the robot.
It answered by producing a laser gun, "No medical staff are permitted within this area." it insisted.
"No, not a doctor. The Doctor." he said quickly, hands up defensively, "Definitive pronoun, capital letter, time-travelling universe-saving very good friend of your man in there."
"Let him in, Zev." the familiar voice said, sounding suddenly very tired.
The robot- Zev, apparently- lowered its weapon and stepped aside, gesturing for the Doctor to enter the other room. With an irritated scowl at the gun, he did so.
"You do know your robot's got a laser gun, right?" he asked casually.
"Yeah." the familiar voice croaked, getting hoarser and weaker, disturbingly quickly, "It used to belong to a friend. The gun. The robot's new this century."
The Doctor stepped past the curtain that had been blocking his view of the rest of the room, and saw the man he had been speaking to, sitting up on a hospital bed, under a very bright light.
Captain Jack Harkness.
Except he was in terrible condition. Half his face was stripped of flesh, one whole arm was bare bone held together by only the least strings of muscle remaining, large chunks of flesh were missing from one leg, and his undamaged hand covered a gaping hole in his abdomen.
Basically, the whole right-hand side of his body was completely ravaged.
Jack looked up slowly, and a faint smile pulled at the good side of his face, his one functional eye glittering with happiness at the sight of the Doctor.
"You're looking good, Doc." Jack said weakly.
As the Doctor watched- stared in horror- Jack's injuries became progressively worse. Whatever was wrong with him was spreading, and it seemed to be eating away at his face. Jack flinched visibly, "Talk later, this is kinda urgent. Zev!"
"Yes, sir?" the smooth voice asked.
"Set up for radiation level seven. I don't honestly care if it does turn me to dust, as long as it completely destroys the infection."
Zev nodded obediently, and set to work.
"It's nothing contagious, is it, Jack?" the Doctor asked in a warning tone.
Jack shook his head, coughing when he tried to laugh, "I shouldn't think so. And the containment area in the next room is there as a failsafe, anyway."
The Doctor frowned. There was nothing in the next room that could possibly count as a containment area for infection. The door hadn't even been locked!
Jack coughed again, this time bringing up blood, "Oh... lungs. That's bad. Zev, I need another shot."
"Right away, sir." Zev answered promptly. Then, to the Doctor's utter horror, the robot pulled out the laser gun and fired it at Jack's chest.
Jack fell back onto the bed with what seemed like a sense of relief.
The Doctor stared at the robot in horror, "What- what did you do that for?"
"Just following orders, Doctor." it said smoothly, before proceeding to continue with its preparations for the radiation treatment Jack had requested.
The Doctor looked from Zev to Jack, and then back again... before settling on watching Jack until he resurrected. It made his skin crawl to feel the full effect of the immortal's curse, as Jack's injuries healed before his eyes.
When Jack suddenly sat bolt-upright, gasping for breath, the Doctor took an instinctive step backwards.
"Whoa. Much better." Jack said, stretching his newly healed arm, "That should hold it off for a little while." He stared at his own right hand, flexing the newly healed fingers, and frowning slightly, "This is by far the worst way to die, for me. Ever." He glanced at the Doctor, smirking, "Very fast, usually, but as it's me... well. MY body fights back." He swung his legs over the side of the bed, and grinned unashamedly at the Doctor, "So, you wanted to speak to me, Doc?"
The Doctor hesitated for a moment, then nodded, "Yes. Yes, I did. First thing's first, though, what sort of infection is this, exactly?"
"Uh, probably the wrong word." Jack said, and he winced slightly, "There's one incredibly easy way to explain it, but I don't think I can tell you yet."
"Why not?" the Doctor asked, frowning.
"Too soon. Timelines." Jack grinned faintly, then winced once more, "Zev, run the radiation wave as soon as it's ready, please."
"One minute six seconds, sir." the robot answered.
"Don't you just love the timekeeping? One of my favourite things about robots." Jack said brightly, "And the manners, but that's just personal preference. Of course, they're rubbish in bed."
The Doctor blinked once, "Should I leave, or is this radiation going to be contained?"
"Haven't you noticed the energy field around my bed?" Jack shook his head, "Energy beams can get in, but nothing physical. And absolutely nothing gets out. It's very easy to deal with, outside the human body... it's getting it out of me that's the problem. You're perfectly safe where you are." he said with a smug grin.
The Doctor sulked slightly at not having noticed that energy field.
A brief silence was followed by the robot announcing, "Initiating radiation wave." It glanced up at Jack, "This will kill you, sir." Then to the Doctor, "And I'd advise you to cover your eyes, Doctor." It turned back to its work, and began the countdown, "Five. Four. Three." The Doctor put his hands over his eyes. "Two. One."
A blinding flash of light flooded the room. The Doctor could see it even with his eyes tight shut, and the heels of his hands pressed into them. When the light finally dimmed, the Doctor peeked out from between his fingers, to see Jack sitting there, chuckling silently.
"Did it work?" the Doctor asked. He couldn't see any discernible difference.
"Not sure yet." Jack looked to Zev, "Full scan?"
"Right away, sir." Zev set about operating the controls to scan Jack, while the Doctor slowly lowered his hands.
"You going to tell me what was wrong, now?" the Doctor asked.
"Not sure I should. Spoilers." Jack said vaguely, "But... if you're not ready, we can make you forget, you agree?"
The Doctor gave him a sceptical look, "If I must." he muttered, a bit resentfully.
Jack grinned, "Alright then, Sweetie."
Silence.
"What did you just call me?" the Doctor asked, incredulously.
"Sweetie." Jack said, trying not to laugh, "And for the record, this little flesh-eating problem was only the second time you've ever left me for dead, and in all fairness you really didn't know it was me, so I figure we're not doing too badly on percentages, so far."
"Oh... no." the Doctor took a step back, and Jack actually started laughing now.
"Of course, dying reverts my entire body to the state it was in immediately before my first death, so the treatment wore off when I resurrected. Zev, when can we re-do that, by the way?"
"Two hours, seven minutes and thirty-three seconds." the robot answered efficiently.
The Doctor stared at Jack for a moment, "But- but why? And how, for that matter?"
"Genetic therapy." Jack shrugged, "It's from New New Earth. You helped me get my hands on it, actually." he paused, and chuckled, "Or you will."
"Scan complete. Treatment unsuccessful." Zev announced.
"Oh damn it!" Jack complained, collapsing back onto the bed. Rather over-dramatically, the Doctor thought.
"Perhaps I can help." the Doctor suggested, "Since I know what we're dealing with."
Jack opened one eye, and stared at him, "Yes, please." he said, in a low voice that sounded disturbingly like Jack had greatly misinterpreted the Doctor's offer.
x x x
Two hours later, and with the Doctor's help, Jack was cured. Half a dozen complete scans had been run to ensure that no trace of what Jack was tactfully calling an 'infection' remained.
The energy field was lifted, and Jack immediately lunged at the Doctor, hugging him fiercely. "You're amazing, you know that, don't you?" he murmured, almost seductively, in the Doctor's ear.
The Doctor pushed him away, laughing, "You know- irrational as it might sound- there was half a second, not long after the Byzantium, when I thought Amy was almost as bad as you." he joked.
Jack raised an eyebrow, smirking, "Oh, now we can't have that, can we, Sweetie." he laughed.
"Please stop calling me that, with that face!" the Doctor retorted, indignantly, "Bad enough you somehow learned to write it in High Gallifreyan. There isn't even a syllable in that language for cheeky abbreviations, and yet somehow you managed it!"
Jack grinned unrepentantly.
"How did you manage that, anyway?" the Doctor asked, suddenly realising this could be the point where he learns everything about River Song.
"Spoilers." Jack said, with with a smug grin, "That and how I flew the TARDIS. Absolutely huge spoilers."
"And the murder?" the Doctor prodded, hopefully.
"Trans-temporal suicide." Jack answered bluntly.
The Doctor winced, "How? And more importantly, why?"
"I'm glad you asked." Jack crowed, sounding very proud of himself, "Captain Jack Harkness was rather infamous, before he was murdered. Everyone knew him, he was a hero and a saviour of worlds. Brilliant publicity, and surprisingly no one ever bothered trying to dig up the dirt on him. The truth."
The Doctor raised an eyebrow at this.
"I wasn't really that man." Jack continued, leaning back against the edge of the hospital bed as he continued to speak, far more sedately, now, "It was an illusion, and a good one, but I had lost far more lives than I saved. It felt like there was a curse around me, and I don't mean the one you can sense. Anyone who I got close to died young... with one exception, my lovers never lived past their thirties."
The Doctor took a step closer, placing a comforting hand on Jack's shoulder.
"I was tired of playing up to the illusion, and by then my own birth was only half a century away. If the Agency got wind of the connection... especially after my desertion. No, I couldn't stay in the public eye like that, and just disappearing would make me a legend. I wanted to be a martyr again."
"Again?" the Doctor asked, curiously.
"Longer story." Jack snorted, "I spent three decades planning my own death. I created River, gave her a history and a life that should have belonged to one of my own descendants. She was stillborn, but the records were easy to falsify. All the best schools, perfect attendance record, she would have been a brilliant woman had she been real."
Jack sighed, and paused for a moment, considering carefully before continuing.
"When I finally met her, I must say I was surprised, not knowing at that point what my own face would look like after the treatment... but I had a codeword, so I would know it was coming."
"Let me guess..." the Doctor muttered, and Jack grinned.
"Yeah; 'Sweetie'. But after she killed me- and Zev indulged in some grave-robbing that I've been assured was quite enjoyable- I travelled back in time, and then went through the treatment. New face, new decade, new life."
The Doctor smiled wryly, "I know that feeling."
"I became River when she was twenty-six. She had supposedly just finished an advanced course in non-human linguistics, cross-species culture, and ancient inter-planetary history. Who would expect a time-traveller to be an archaeologist?" Jack nudged the Doctor in the ribs, playfully, "The Agency would point and laugh."
The Doctor chuckled, "I guess so."
"But then the whole plan went straight to hell, when I met you." Jack said, grinning at the Doctor, "You knew who I was, the hints were subtle but definitely there. I didn't admit it, but I didn't deny it either, and I guess we had some sort of silent understanding. You let me travel with you occasionally, but for the most part you let me get on with my plan. You might not have wanted me around, or you might not have wanted to accidentally overshoot and make me miss my own murder. I was never really sure, but I assumed you knew, and it was the latter."
"Narcissist." the Doctor muttered with a snort.
"What?" Jack asked, amused but puzzled at the sudden turn in the conversation.
"You said you murdered the best man you had ever known." the Doctor laughed, "For a while there I thought you meant me!"
"Now who's the narcissist?" Jack asked, laughing, "I murdered an illusion. He really was a saint, and I always wished I could have lived up to even a fraction of what they thought of him."
"Sir, the treatment is ready when you are." Zev put in smoothly.
Jack looked at the Doctor, and smiled, "You might want to wait here, Sweetie."
Jack only just dodged the smack upside the head that the Doctor aimed his way, as he turned and ran off the far side of the room, where Zev was waiting.
Zev diligently pulled a curtain around Jack, and the machinery there, and the Doctor was left with nothing to do but sit and wait.
x x x
The Doctor had been sitting, slouched in a chair, waiting. He heard the curtain open, and immediately stood up, pretending to have been alert the whole time.
He turned to face... River Song.
He blinked, shook his head and looked again. He had known this was what he would see, but it was still so hard to believe.
Zev stepped past them both, and proceeded to tidy the hospital bed. The Doctor glanced at the robot for a moment, unsure what to make of its behaviour, either.
"He's destroying evidence. Leave him to it." River said vaguely.
"He?" the Doctor asked, curiously.
"She. It." River shrugged, "All of the above?" she smiled distantly, "When he's destroying evidence, he's a he."
The Doctor gave her a curious look. She simply shrugged once more.
"Doctor." Rory's voice called from behind him.
River looked past the Doctor, smiling warmly at Rory, "Well hello there, handsome." she purred.
Rory did a double-take at her, "Er... hi." he muttered.
"Down, girl. He's Amy's." the Doctor said, laughing lightly. He noticed River tense, but Rory seemed too stunned at the 'handsome' remark.
Rory turned his head quickly, business-like, to the Doctor, "Amy's demanding to know where you are. Threatening to tear down the whole place if you don't show your face."
"That's our girl." River said cheerfully.
"Well why didn't you tell her where I am?" the Doctor asked with open confusion at this failure to do the obvious.
Rory blinked, "Oh. Yeah, right." he said, nodding, "I'll do that." and he was off.
As soon as Rory was out of earshot, River turned to the Doctor, seeming suddenly rather serious, "I don't know him."
The Doctor blinked, "So?"
"So send him home." River's tone grew more urgent, "Now." She took the Doctor's hands, her expression pleading, "When we meet at the Pandorica, Amy is with you. Just Amy."
"I can't do that." the Doctor said, shaking his head, "They won't let each other out of their sight. It's kinda cute, actually. They're completely in love."
River's gaze intensified a hundred-fold, and her tone darkened, "So completely in love that one will follow the other into hell and certain death. I know how that feels, Doctor. Do you know how many times I killed myself, for every time that's happened to me? The guilt eats me up inside more than any monster could. Please, do this for her, Doctor."
The Doctor stared at her for a moment. Then he noticed her eyes dart briefly to Zev, and he understood. Zev was not a normal robot, not by a long shot. "Who were they?" he asked quietly.
She suddenly looked sombre, "The accent was my wife's in the early fortieth century, some of our descendants are still alive today. The face belonged to a woman in the twenty-five hundreds, who I studied with for a decade. The gun... that was a Time Agent, my oldest friend, and the only idiot ever to love me unrequitedly. The mannerisms..." she shuddered slightly, "He died young, because he trusted me and I couldn't protect him."
"I'm sorry." the Doctor said softly, almost instinctively reaching up to touch her hair. It was Jack's colour, not blonde, so he assumed she usually dyed it.
She stared at him plaintively, "Trust me Doctor, Amy doesn't want that."
"I don't want what, now?" Amy asked, striding brashly into the room, Rory at her heel like an obedient puppy.
River smiled, going from sombre and pained to cheerful and flirty in less than a heartbeat, as she turned to face the newcomers, "Hey, Amy. Long time no see."
"Yeah, nice to see you again, River." Amy said quickly, dismissively, "Now what don't I want?"
River gave the Doctor a significant look, and he knew she read it in his eyes- his unwillingness to share the truth with his companions- before he turned to Amy, feigning cheer with the same ease as River had a moment ago, "Oh, nothing. I was just telling her about this wonderful little planet in the Sensephere system. Glaciers and telepaths, I thought-"
"Either of you watch Star Wars?" River interrupted. Rory nodded. "It's worse than Hoth!"
The Doctor shot her a glare.
"I think you should take them to the Vegas six system. They'd love it." River said brightly. She was a damned good actor, when she set her mind to it.
The Doctor did understand, and agree with, her suggestion to try to keep them safe. Vegas Six was the only one of that chain of commercial worlds that had a zero mortality rate. It also consisted of very little other than gambling and orgies.
"You would think that." the Doctor muttered, frowning.
"Well wherever you go, I'm afraid I have work here, so I can't join you." River said, shrugging dismissively, "But I'll catch you again when I was ten years younger." she added, winking at Amy.
Amy blinked, and smirked as she understood. The Doctor never ceased to marvel at Amy's innate ability to understand time travel in a way most of his companions had failed to do, before.
"And I still think the Doctor should take you both on a nice holiday." she shot the Doctor a bright smile which he knew held hidden meaning the others couldn't see. "He could take you two somewhere nice... romantic."
"With no vampires!" Rory added quickly.
River raised an eyebrow, amused, "Dare I ask?"
"They weren't really vampires." the Doctor defended, "Fish from space. In Venice."
River rolled her eyes, laughing, "How about somewhere the twenty-first century calls romantic? You archaic old man." she added, elbowing the Doctor playfully, "Amy, you pick. Your personal, ideal holiday location. Anywhere, anywhen."
Amy's eyes lit up, and she looked at Rory with a grin, "Well, we've always wanted to visit Rio."
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