hm... what can i say? its 4:30AM and ive been listening to fergie all night (dont ask why, i wouldn't be able to tell you :S) and this idea kinda crept into my head. So, not exactly a song fic. not like a song fic at all really. its just a story about Peach and Mario, and a picnic they're having. Today is also the day Peach introduces her new candy bar: Peachalicious. and that's all i can tell ya, have fun reading.

TIP: really helps if you know the song. if not, you wont get this at all.

Peachalicious
By: HylianHero128

Four, tres, two, uno!

Yonder past a sunny meadow 'mongst the hills of the oft-visited Nintendo Land, Mario was treating Peach to a picnic. The picnic basket in tow contained a cornucopia of goodies, including Peach's new Peachalicious Chocolate Bars: Guaranteed to put yo' boys on rock rock! Mario halted.

"Listen up, Peach, 'cause this is it."

Peach sighed happily. "Yes, we made it to the picnic spot!" She set down her basket upon the soft grass and sat herself.

Mario reached into said picnic basket and withdrew a Peachalicious Bar. "Why are these bars called 'Peachalicious'?" Mario asked, taking a bite.

"Well..." Peach said, clearing her throat. "Peachalcious, definition: make them boys go loco."

"But why are you selling chocolate bars?" Mario inquired further "Don't you have enough money?"

"They want my treasure." Peach replied.

"They being...?"

"Wario and Bowser. So they get their pleasure from my photo."

Mario choked on his chocolate. "What? Wario and Bowser?!"

But Peach shook her head reassuringly. "They can see me, they can't squeeze me. I aint easy, I aint sleazy. I got reasons why I tease'em, Bowser comes and goes like seasons."

Mario gasped dramatically. "Peach! Why didn't you tell me?"

"But, I aint promiscious! And if you was suspicious, all that shit is ficticious!"

"Oh good." Relief washed over Mario

"I blow them kisses."

Mario eyed Peach again. "You do what?"

"It puts them boys on rock rock, and they be lining down the block just to watch what I got."

The last comment left Mario rather speechless. He was a little peeved that Peach was flirting with his arch-nemeses. Sensing this, Peach abruptly changed the subject. She too took a bite of a Peachalicious Bar.

"It's so delicious!" She said. But as she held it in her hands, it was already starting to melt. "It's hot hot!"

Mario wasn't really paying attention, as he was reading the label. "I put them boys on rock rock."

Peach handed Mario her melting chocolate bar. "You want a taste of what I got?" She asked. Mario obliged and took a bite.

"Peachalicious... t-t-t-t-t-tasty tasty!" Mario said in jittery excitement. Their picnic was enjoyed in peace for a good few minutes, until Peach spoke up again.

"Peachalicious def--" But she was interupted but some indistinguishable sound.

"Peachalicious def--" Again, interrupted. This time, the voice was more clear, and Peach saw Zelda and Link climbing the hill.

Zelda and Link waved, nearing the picnic. They both sat down, and Link took a chocolate bar. "Huh? What is Peacha--"

"Peachalicious, definition: make them boys go crazy." Peach explained.

"You're selling candy?" Link asked incredulously. "Aren't you famous enough already?"

Peach shook her head "They always claim they know me. Coming to me, calling me Stacey..."

Link took a bite of his Peachalicious Bar. "It's so delicious!" He handed one to Zelda, but she declined, and Link remembered Zelda was on a diet.

"My body stay vicious." Zelda said. "I was up in the gym, just working on my fitness." She pointed to Mario. "He's my witness."

"Oooh wee." Link said. Suddenly, Zelda leapt at Link, and started grabbing at Link's Peachalicious bar, her rage driven by hunger.

"Ho-ho-ho-hold up!" Link said, struggling against the princess.

Peach and Mario stared in awe. "Check it out!" The said.

"Baby, baby." Link said from under Zelda. "If you really want... Honey get some patience!" Link cried. "Maybe then you'll get a taste!"

Meanwhile, Mario was gorging himself with chocolate. "I'll be tasty tasty."

While Peach was examining her dress. "I'll be laced with lacey."

Mario just couldn't get over the Peachalicious. "It's so tasty tasty! It'll make me crazy!"

Zelda had finally managed to pry the Peachalicious from Link's hands. Unfortunately, in the struggle, it had melted all over her face.

Link gasped. "Girl! You tasty! T, to the A, to the S-T-E-Y!"

Peach rolled her eyes. "Link, you dumbass. You're not even spelling it right. Besides, chocolate-covered or not, I'm hotter than Zelda. Any day."

Zelda snorted. "Yeah right."

Peach disagreed. "All the time I turn around brotha's gather round always looking at me up and down looking at my--"

"Uhh.." Link said awkwardly. Zelda held Link protectively. "You're not getting Link."

"I just wanna say it now. I ain't trying to round up drama little mama. I don't wanna take your man. And I know I'm coming off just a little bit conceited, and I keep on repeating how the boys wanna eat it." Peach pointed to her candy bar. "But I'm tryin' to tell, that I can't be treated like clientele, 'cause they say it's so delicious."

Zelda groaned. "You think you're so delicious just because you have your own chocolate bars. Well you're not."

"Aye aye, I am." Suddenly letting her pirate mannerisms get the better of her.

But the argument wouldn't end there. Zelda and Peach would spend the better part of the day debating. Meanwhile, Link continued to spell the word 'tasty' wrong, much to Peach's frustration. And Mario? He just ate. After all, he needs to keep that sexy plumber figure.

pointless story? pretty much. but it was fun to write, lemme tell ya.

of course, i had to tweak parts of the song. i only did the chorus once, because i didnt want to repeat it, same goes for any other parts that repeat, for people wondering why it kept jumping around

and i realized, Zelda's line
"You think you're so delicious just because you have your own chocolate bars. Well you're not."
is really similar to a line she has in another story of mine Heart of Gold (next chapter started, fyi!)
"You all act like this is the worst to ever happen. Well it's not"
and that was totally unintentional, but kinda cool.

and for people (like me) who dont know who 'promiscious' means, its basically a fancy word for slutty.

anyways, sorry if you're not a fergie fan. personally i'm not one myself, but i am a sucker for a really catchy song.

thanks for readin!

oh, and go on YouTube and search 'fergalicious parody'. it'll be worth your time.

-ciao!