A/N: This is a piece of background story to my elf character Greenfinch, explaining her flashbacks and aversive reaction to light magic. She has at a young age been abducted by drow.
This character is heavily inspired by the main character of the fic "Unwell" by Socks4Dobby.
Enjoy!
Her Mistress' Power
A story about Greenfinch
by Emily J. Redbird
The clammy rag cooled her already stiff fingers. Time and time again, she let the grey cloth swipe across the bookshelves, her Gracious Mistress' bedside table, across every horizontal surface in the room. (She had been allowed to skip herself, and she would need a bigger rag for the floor.) The warm carpet felt nice beneath her slightly blue toes, but it could not keep the cold away on it's own. Her Gracious Mistress was out, and so she had let the fire in the fireplace die out – no need to waste any firewood on an elf. She sniffed at the thought of that horrible name she would have to bear forever as punishment for being so ugly, so revolting, so light. She was born to be worth nothing – her skin alone was proof of that – so strangely pink, like that of a new born rat – but even the rats quickly shed to colour with their greyish fur, whereas she could do nothing to escape her own detestableness.
She had now reached her Gracious Mistress' vanity table. She mechanically lifted the oil lamp, the only source of light in the room, and let the rag catch the grey powder underneath. It hurt her to see that so much dust had accumulated. She should have been more careful! Stupid, stupid, stupid! Mistress was exceptionally gracious, keeping on trying to correct her useless elf instead of killing her like a deformed bat, like anyone else would have done (Mistress said so, and so it had to be true).
The mirror was vertical and needed a clean rag, but the frame was horizontal. She forced her icy toes to carry her weight, allowing her to reach the topmost edges of the frame. When the entire silver frame of the mirror shone as it used to, she looked nervously at the fireplace. Her Mistress would be home soon. She should get a fire going, but Mistress had assigned her a task, and she still needed to do the rest of the vanity table and the bureau. Perhaps if she finished early, she would have time to start the fire before her Mistress came home. Yes, that would please her very much, her Good and Gracious Mistress, whom she had so much to thank for.
With renewed energy, she resolutely grabbed the jewellery box, lifting it, but her eagerness she had only grabbed the lid, and before she could blink the jewellery had spilled across the floor. Her stomach turned to ice. Oh no! How could she be such a stupid and useless elf! Before she even realised what was happening, she was on her knees, trying to put the jewellery back as fast as possible, but she had never opened the jewellery box before (she was not allowed), so she had no idea how to put all those many necklaces and bracelets and gleaming rings back. She bit her lip, and tears started to gather in her eyes.
But she had to do something. And so she took a small handful of rings and put them in the small drawer in the shrine – that had to be at least close to right. Then she took a necklace from the pile, and was just about to put it in the large part of the box when something stopped her.
A gentle song rung from her hand, and a strange pleasant feeling swept through her, just like when her Mistress watched her with satisfied eyes, patted her head, and even let her sleep on the floor right by her bed. Greenfinch studied the piece of jewellery in her hand. The pendant was round and golden, and in the middle was a strange symbol that seemed to glow in the dark of the chamber. How had she not noticed it before? It felt warm and comforting in her hand, and with careful moves she cupped it in her hands, allowing to better see and protect the mysterious necklace. She starred at it, hypnotised, and let the feeling wash over her. It felt like a gentle hand, tenderly stroking her hair, never stopping.
Suddenly, the door come open with a bang, and Greenfinch dropped the necklace in alarm. The oil lamp had burned out, and the light from the hallway blinded her. With an icy fear, she quickly kneeled deeply to her Mistress.
"Gracious Mistress," she tried to say, but her stupid trembling muddled the words. Stupid, stupid, stupid and worthless!
The high heeled feet paused by her head, easily within kicking range, the elf noted and shuddered. The silence stretched, and she could feel her Gracious Mistress considering her. She squeezed her eyes shut and waited for a blow.
"Now, what do we have here," Mistress' magnificent voice purred. "An attempted theft, or just an elf too stupid to understand, what it is told?" Mistress began circling her, still within kicking range. "A creature so wretched it cannot even remember what it was told just an hour ago?"
Greenfinch gathered up, and finally managed to stammer: "For- forgive me, Gracious Mistress. Y- you are f-free to p-p-p-punish me as you s-s-see fit."
The kick came swiftly and precisely, the pointy shoes striking right between two ribs. "And you bet I will. Elf!" Mistress spat on her at the last word.
If only she had not let herself be tempted. If only she had checked if the jewellery box was locked. If only she could have been less stupid. Then her Mistress would not need to spend her precious time chastising her.
Mistress sat down right by her head, and a long nail touched her neck. With a firm grip on her chin, Mistress pulled her head upwards. Greenfinch lowered her eyes as much as possible, trying not to make eye contact with a superior. Her Mistress was smiling now, she could hear that.
"Bring me the box." She threw Greenfinch across the floor by her chin. "Now."
"Yes, Gracious Mistress," Greenfinch managed to say, picking herself up from the floor. "Right away." She knew that box well. All too well. She reached into her Mistress closet with practiced hands and drew out the dark wooden box. It was no bigger than her chest, not very heavy either, but it meant a lot of things, none of them nice. Mistress had always, as far as Greenfinch knew, had it. All too many time over the years, the Mistress had had to ask her to fetch it, so she could improve the eternally worthless elf.
"Lay down by the fireplace, flat on your back," Mistress ordered, not looking up from the box. Greenfinch obeyed with a large lump in her throat. Her feet felt heavy and her head light. She could hear her Mistress inspecting the tools in the box, seeking out a fitting one for today's chastisement. Greenfinch prayed she would not take the whip – Mistress had a very hard, very dark, and very painful whip that she used for special occasions – but on the other hand, this was a special occasion. Greenfinch shuddered. Stupid, stupid and worthless!
Her Mistress emitted a satisfied Hmm and rose from the bed. Greenfinch tried not to move, but it was hard; she was trembling from the centre of her stomach, and she could not seem to stop.
"Of course," Mistress mumbled from across the room. Then a rattling of thin chains. Oh no, oh no, oh no…
"This?" Mistress hissed and held up that thrice damned necklace with the strange symbol, the one that got Greenfinch into all this trouble. "Never, never, never," Mistress slapped her in the face for each 'never', "touch this again. Is that clear?"
Greenfinch nodded desperately.
"I said," Mistress growled, "is that clear?"
"Y-yes," she managed. She suddenly realised her horrible mistake, and hurriedly amended: "I mean, yes, Gracious Mistress! I apologise! You are free to pun-" She never got any further, before receiving another hard blow to the face. She couldn't help the small whimper that escaped her. Stupid, stupid, stupid!
"Hmmmmmmm," Mistress contemplated, ostensibly very pleased, and put the necklace away. That was when Greenfinch saw what her Mistress had taken from the box, and her body went completely cold. Mistress made herself comfortable beside her slave and contemplated her out stretched body, looking for the perfect place to begin. Then she braced herself against her stomach, and Greenfinch saw the little knife that Mistress wielded so masterfully approach her stomach. She flinched involuntarily.
"Did I not tell you to keep still?" Mistress thundered. "Pain!" It was over in just a few seconds. But it felt like an eternity. When it was finally over, her Mistress chuckled ominously and made a sudden slash across her thigh. Greenfinch startled violently at the unexpected pain and bit her lip hard not to scream. Like the bite of a rattlesnake came the next, and the next, and the next, parallel to the first cut. She felt the warm liquid trickle down her leg and thought in horror of what her Mistress would say when she found out that she had bled on her Mistress nice, clean carpet.
Then Mistress grabbed her wrist and forced it to the floor. How embarrassed her Mistress must be feeling! To be forced to resort to physical strength, when an order should have been enough!
She made a small, calculated cut, masterfully right beside the artery, in the flesh where it hurt the very most. Greenfinch squeezed her eyes shut and tensed every muscle in her body (or rather, her Mistress' body) to avoid flinching. But by closing her eyes she had made herself vulnerable and unprepared for the sudden jolt up her arm. Her Mistress was pushing two fingers into the small cut, making circles, and the pain was indescribable.
"Can you feel it yet?" her Mistress asked mockingly. Greenfinch nodded frantically, for she was afraid that if she opened her mouth, she would cry out. Mistress' long nails cut against the inside of the wound like knives.
She did not know for how long her Mistress kept at it. But suddenly her Gracious Mistress removed her fingers from the cut, and Greenfinch could hardly believe her luck. Was it over? Had she been punished enough? She could still feel the imprint of Mistress' nails, and her stomach was still trembling. She allowed herself a sigh of relief.
Pain. Worse than before. Only years of practice kept Greenfinch from crying out in surprise. Her Mistress had put her fingers back in the wound, but this time the pain was hundred times worse. Greenfinch bit her lip as hard as she could, but still small whimpers escaped her. Stupid, stupid, stupid! How could she ever think that she had been punished enough? She was an elf, born to fail! She could not help huddling into herself, bringing her legs to her chest and hiding her face in her knees. Only the arm that her Mistress held outstretched remained in place. Her Mistress was right, she could not keep still, stupid, stupid, stupid!
"I- I beg you," Greenfinch blubbered. "I beg y-you." Begging only made things worse, but she could not control her vocal chords (that her Mistress had graciously let her keep).
"So I hear," Mistress answered pleasantly and undauntledly kept on going around and around inside the smarting wound.
"No, no," Greenfinch sobbed. "I'm begging you! No. Don't. No!"
The fingers froze inside the wound. "Are you giving your Mistress orders?" Mistress asked, dangerously calm. "Are you giving your Mistress orders?!" she thundered.
"Greenie! Greenfinch, wake up!"
The flesh yielded to Mistress' renewed pressure. She tasted blood on her tongue. She must have bit her lip too hard. Oh, why did she have to be so stupid? Why did she have to be so stupid?! It would be much better for her Mistress to just get rid of her once and for all. She could never improve such an elf. Such a freak. A monstrosity. A creep.
"There there, Green, it's going to be all right, I'm here."
Her eyelids turned sharply red, and a horrible warmth seeped through her bones. Could this be death for slaves? A horrible, hot place, where they punished you forever and ever? That sounded like something Greenfinch needed. Punishment.
"Greenie! Wake up! You aren't in the Underworld anymore! Wake up!"
She sent a last thought to her Gracious Mistress, who she had so suddenly left. She shuddered. She had taken her Mistress' property. She was the worst kind of thief. She had stolen an entire life from her Mistress.
"Easy now, Greenie, I'm here."
Suddenly, she realised that someone were shaking her by her shoulder. The pain was fading, and the light on the other side of her eyelids turned brighter.
"Green? Are you there? Wake up! Open your eyes!"
The last part was an order. And if there was one thing Greenfinch knew how to do, it was to follow orders.
A familiar face looked down at her. It took her a moment to place.
"Eigi," she mumbled.
"Easy now, Green. You're not with the Mistress any longer. She holds no power over us anymore."
She looked up at the large, glowing tree above her, and shuddered at the familiar warmth. The same warmth she had felt from her Mistress' forbidden necklace. The feeling of light magic.
"No, of course," she agreed. "She holds no power over me…"
[1]: In this universe, every drow is brought up to feel excruciating pain whenever a superior looks them in the eye and says "Pain". There is no magic involved, it is all psychological. As part of drow society (admittedly the bottom of it), Greenfinch has been brought up by the same rules.