The silence was almost deafening as Lizzie stared at the back headrest in the SUV, she could feel Red's eyes on her; almost as if burning a whole. The tears running freely down her cheek were hot against her cool skin and that's when she turned and couldn't bite her tongue any longer.

"I will never understand you as much and as hard as I try to." She shook her head slowly, her tear filled eyes locked with his.

"You don't want me to stay distant from you, yet when I show any sign of care for you there you always sit. Scolding me, emotionless like a tin man. You might not think so but I know you have a heart, I know you can feel Red. Or maybe you can't…maybe you're so broken you really can't feel anything."

She sniffled and wiped her cheeks and waited a few more seconds for him to say something, anything.

His hand moved slightly against the seat cushion.

"Lizzie…" But nothing else came out. Turning her head she looked at him and watched his mouth close again and she sniffled again.

"You know what…never mind."

Her hand moved to the door handle and she got out of the SUV and slammed the door causing him to flinch. Red swallowed hard and leaned his head back letting out a shaky breath and running his right hand over his face and through his short hair as his eyes closed and he felt the SUV starting to pull away.

Once Lizzie had gotten back to her hotel room she took a long hot shower and put her robe in. Glancing at her phone she saw she had a missed call from Tom and groaned as he cleared it, she had no intentions of calling him back, truth be told she didn't even know why she had been talking him again. Old habits maybe, wanting some feeling of her normal life back, but it was all a lie and that's all it would ever be.

TWO WEEKS LATER

Lizzie was sitting in her new apartment, she didn't know why she had finally decided to move in but she was glad she did. It was by no means home, but it was getting there. She rubbed her forehead as she held her wine glass in her hand, the day had been filled with nothing but stress at the post office, and the fact that her and Red still were barely speaking was getting to her more than she would have liked to admit.

She sipped her wine and turned the TV off, enjoying the moments of silence when she heard a knock at her door. Tensing she placed her glass down and thought of grabbing her gun but instead she crept to the door and peeked out the peep hole and was surprised to see Red standing there staring down at the floor. Biting her lip she slowly unlocked the door and then opened it and watched as he lifted his head up and looked at her.

"Red, what are you doing here?"

His jaw worked a little before he finally spoke.

"May I come inside for just a few moments?"

She waited a few seconds and then nodded and stepped to the side allowing him in and then closed the door behind him. He glanced around and nodded smiling a little.

"I'm glad you finally accepted my offer, it bothered me so much to know you were living in such filth."

Lizzie crossed her arms and leaned against the entertainment center.

"Why are you here? If it's about another blacklist I am honestly too tired to even deal with it right now and would much prefer if we waited until tomorrow to discuss it."

He swallowed hard and glanced down.

"Sometimes I wish I was a young boy again, skinned knees are easier to fix than a broken man. I have done…unspeakable things in my life, things that I am not proud of. My hands will forever be stained red with the blood I have caused."

Turning more towards her he locked his eyes with hers and his voice deepened, his jaw clenching.

"When it becomes harder to heal than it is to kill, to take a life…that's when a man knows he has turned cold Lizzie. His thoughts are not…like the average persons. Where others find light he sees only darkness, even in situations where there is a light even a faint one at the end of the tunnel. "

Red shook his head slightly and took a step towards her.

"People fear death even more than pain. It's strange that they fear death. Life hurts a lot more than death. At the point of death, the pain is over. But…then all of a sudden while stuck in that dark pit…there it is, a myriad of twinkling, shimmering stars in the light of day. And you think for just that fleeting moment how for the beauty to be truly appreciated, the darkness that surrounded you… it was there for that specific purpose, it was because of that darkness the light…that glow could be seen and appreciated."

Lizzie swallowed hard and felt herself trying not to cry for the man standing in front of her, a man of seemingly no emotion that was bearing his soul.

He stepped closer to her and his eyes danced over her face before they locked with hers again. The tears that were threatening to fall from her eyes before now glistened on her cheeks.

"You saved my life…and I'm not just talking about the other night at the auction. And you're right…when someone helps you, you should tell them thank you."

He nodded slightly and swallowed hard before he reached up and used his thumbs to softly wipe the tears from her face and then he let his hands cup her face.

"Thank you Lizzie."