Fashionable Martial Artist Boy - Ranma
A Ranma1/2 Yawara crossover short story
By Kim Smuga-Otto
It was a quiet Sunday afternoon in Nerima, which was not the norm. Down the
street, an aged man led a teenage girl towards the local dojo. A person with
a martial arts background could have told you that the old man walked with the
strenght and agility of somebody one-third of his age, and that the girl, for
all her generic Japanese cuteness, had a balance to her step not found in the
common mallrat, teenybopper. To which any of the streets residents would have
said:
"Well, duh!"
***
Kasumi was glad Happosai hadn't chosen today to stop by. There might not be
enough food as is, the strange visitor seemed to have a bottomless stomach.
"We have unfinished business with Mr. Saotome." He said between mouthfuls.
"When we met, many years ago, he spoke of his art, of the superiority of
his school's techniques... delicious udon unagi, by the way, nice and traditional.
You don't happen to have any more, do you?"
Kasumi nodded, and as she entered the kitchen she heard the man continue. "He
also spoke of his son, and the expenses of training and raising the boy . .
."
***
Soun felt a familiar sense of dread as he pieced together the story. His friend
Genma had, as usual, with promises of a strong husband and united households,
weaseled food and accomodations from this naïve old man. It was embarrassing
to see a person so gullible.
***
Genma was thinking hard. You tell a person you've been travelling and training
for over ten years and they don't realize the sheer distance and number of people
you meet along the way. After while it all becomes a blur.
At a certain point, he'd drafted up a standard contract, but he had a feeling
this old guy was from before that. What had he promised and how could he put
a positive spin on it? Or failing that, what was the best way to accidentally
fall into the fish pond?
"And so we came to an agreement," the old man continued, "We
would settle his various debts, and then, when our children were of age -"
"Grandpa!" the girl cried, "You didn't!"
"Why not? You and this boy will fight it out, to prove that judo is indeed the finest martial art. Now go get ready, Yawara!"
***
Ranma was feeling trapped. He didn't fight girls. In his experience it proved
more trouble than it was worth. Either you fought them, won, and they got all
emotional and hated you forever. Or, worse, you fought them, won, and they got
all emotional and became fixated on you.
But then Pop had to bring up the whole honor schtick, which inevitably led
to the seppuku schtick. Talk about being caught between a rock and a hard place.
He could throw the fight, but then Akane would accuse him of liking the girl.
Not that she'd wouldn't accuse him anyway. A guy just couldn't win.
He cleared his mind, focusing on his opponent. She wore a simple gi and possessed
no apparent weapons. Her hair was cut short in a style Ranma was secretly fond
of.
"I'm really sorry about this," she said with genuine regret, "But
my Grandfather can be the most stubborn idiot when it comes to the art."
"No need to explain," said Ranma.
"I'm just glad he didn't arrange for the media to show up. Or . . ."
Ranma followed her confused glance.
"Don't worry," he assured her, "that one's for private distribution
only."
***
Nabiki was cutting it close. Her efforts to postpone the event has failed, depriving
her of betting revenue. She'd had barely enough time to grab her camera, much
less a bucket of water. More the pity, since apparently Judo was a wrestling
sport with plenty of tight holds. Well, she could always Photoshop something
up later.
She set the camera to rapidfire mode, checked her pockets for spare film, and
turned to the girl's grandfather who was even now happily consuming the last
of yesterday's leftover fried squid. What approach should she use for her sales
pitch? He was an old coot, probably meek female was best.
"Honorable Sir, may I-" was all she could manage before he interrupted
her, his head bobbing up and down with enthusiasm.
"But of course. And you're in luck, I have a copy right here."
From some hidden dimension he produced a paperback book featuring a younger
version of himself on the cover. "How would you like it inscribed?"
***
Yawara was incredibly embarrassed. She should have known her grandfather had
something up his sleeve when he proposed that they take the train to Nerima
to catch a special advance showing of the new Hugh Grant movie.
The sooner she was done with this match the better. Carefully, Yawara eyed
her opponent. His stance alone convinced her he was a formidable foe, strong
and almost certainly fast.
Still, he seemed distracted and not quite focused. With sudden clarity, she
realized he wouldn't make the first move.
***
"Ippon!" Shouted the grandfather though a mouthful of pokey sticks.
Akane almost shrieked with joy. Ranma had lost! That loudmouthed, arrogant,
patronizing idiot had lost. And to a girl no less. She felt like dancing.
When Yawako or whatever her name had made the first lunge, Ranma had resorted to his standard move-an-inch-out-of-range dodge. But he had forgottenabout Kasumi's recent mastery of the art of starching shirts, because his clothing wasn't so agile. He was caught. Ranma tried to slip out of the hold, but that was what she wanted. In a motion so fluid it must have been practiced every day of her life, the girl twisted, curled, and kicked back her leg, sending
Ranma over her body and into the floor. He'd attempted one of his mid-air twists,
but her movements were too fast, too tight.
This being Ranma, he was back on his feet almost immediantly. But the call
had been made, and Ranma had lost the match.
Mr. Saotome, currently in panda mode, lumbered over to the girl's grandfather
as best he could. The quickly scribbled sign in his paw bore the words, "Rematch,
rematch!"
"Hah!" laughed the old man, "As if I'd allowed my Yawara to
waste her time with third rate contenders. Her next match will be with a known
favorite, shown on primetime television. And afterwards she will go on to compete
in the Barcelona Olympics. And after she wins, she'll be awarded . . ."
"Grandfather," shouted the girl, an exasperated look on her face,
"I don't want to do anymore of this stupid judo. I just want to be a normal
girl with a normal high school career. I hate practicing day in and day out,
just so you can prove that your martial art is the best. Can't we just call
it off, and then Dad can stop wandering the earth training, and Mom can come
live with us, and . . ."
What a horrible life, thought Akane. And Ranma, by agreeing to this fight in
the first place, had just added to the girl's misery. He should feel ashamed
of himself.
She looked to her appointed fiancée, and saw he was giving the judo
girl and odd look. The sort he sometimes got around Akane, when he'd almost
say something nice only to ruin it with a nasty insult.
"Pop," she heard him saying, "If she's so set on not fighting,
then I ain't gonna fight her."
"The Art! Our Honor!" Saotome wrote in incomplete sentences.
"So I'll fight the old geezer instead. Should be close enough."
He does understand, thought Akane. He's not a complete, unfeeling male chauvinist
after all. He was doing something genuinely nice for this strange girl . . .
And then, Akane realized she was no longer in a good mood.
***
Jigoro was hungry, but that was his natural state and besides, he'd spied an
okonomiyaki restaurant on the corner.
More importantly, he was very satisfied. Not only had Yawara demonstrated the
superiority of Judo over that half-baked, startup martial art, but he'd also
hatched a plan to keep his granddaughter focused on her training. That youngest
Tendou girl had strength, as was evidenced by the way that she threw her defeated
fiancée through the dojo wall, but it was the determination and glee
in her eye as she stalked after him with the mallet that convinced Jigoro that
she would make an ideal rival to Yawara. Nothing like competition to strengthen
a person's resolve.
Now all he had to do was convince her. An easy enough thing, after all, who
wouldn't want to learn and compete in Judo?
copyright July 2001 Kim Smuga-Otto
Authors note: For those of you not familiar, Fashionable Judo Girl Yawara is
a manga and anime that came out at the same time as Ranma 1/2. I'm sure that
there are numerous Japanese fanfics and dojins devoted to Yawara/Ranma cross-overs,
but I have yet to see one in English (Sincere apologies in advance to any authors
who have explored such a cross-over) Finally, I encourage any one interested
in Yawara's Ippon to check out the manga or anime; it is a martial art move
of true beauty.