"Alright men-"

"And women," Ginny interjected sternly.

Bill relented. "And woman to be more correct. This is it. This is the big day."

"The day where Bill get's laid." Charlie muttered.

"Also known as-"

"'Help Tight Arse Stop Being a Tight Arse By Getting Him a Date With the Cute French Girl at The Grocery'."

Fred and George paused. "I think we may have to rework the title. It's getting a little lengthy." George told his twin, who nodded.

Bill flushed. "I said to stop calling it that!" The oldest Weasley brother glared at his snickering siblings, as they all sat around him in the parlor. "Moving on, codenames. Percy?"

Percy cleared his throat. "Uhm, left that to Fred and George." he noticed the devastated look Bill gave him. "What? Do you think I'd actually sacrifice myself for you?"

The rest of the room was trying to cover their laughs with their hands.

Bill was noticeably tense. "Alright, Fred and George."

They both stood up at the same moment. "Alright. Bill here will be 'Eagle One'."

Bill winced.

"Charlie, 'Been There Done That'." Charlie looked a bit offended.

"Percy, 'Currently Doing That'." Percy groaned into his hands.

"Ginny! You're 'It Happened Once in a Dream'."

Ginny shrugged. "Better then the others."

Fred and George smiled almost creepily. "Ron, 'If We Had to Pick A Dude'."

"I feel so offended."

"And lastly, we are... 'Eagle Two'."

"Oh dear god."

"Who told you these were good codenames?"

The twins shrugged, and sat back down again. "We did."

Bill kept his face buried in his hand. "You guys are absolutely no help at all."

Ron patted his oldest brother on the back. "You can do it. Maybe. If you tried a little."

"Your confidence in me is astounding."

"Bill, if you wanted help you sure shouldn't of come to us for it." Charlie told him."I mean, no one here has been in a relationship-"

"That's because you're too obsessed with dragons, Charlie, to have any sort of romantic feelings towards somebody."

Charlie raised an eyebrow. "My obsession of dragons has blocked most of my romantic feelings, you say."

"Yes."

Ron stage whispered to Ginny, "Man, I don't want to know what he finds kinky." which sent her doubled over in a fit of giggles that she didn't even try to hide.

Bill leaned back in his chair and dramatically covered his eyes with his hand. "I'm doomed for eternity. I'll die alone. My only romantic help is a bunch of teenagers who come up with codenames like 'If We Had to Pick A Dude'."

They all shrugged unsympathetically. "Mate, should of thought of this before you came to us."

for my very amazing and lovely friend Eternally Seventeen I hope you like this it's a bit... different from what I first had it as but oh well.

god bless parks and rec

I don't own HP.