The Gay-dy Bunch
Chapter one: 19-2000
Walking the streets of the Underground City, Astro was going about his usual stride he took by himself every morning while conscience either fed him information, kept quiet, or just casually picked at a conversation. He called this his "Silent" walks, seeing as he liked these the best… until he bumped into someone wearing a white lab coat.
"OH! Sorry sir!" Astro exclaimed, taking a step back.
"Oh no, I'm sorry.. I've been in such a rush, oh…. I'm Dr. Finian Kenny Jr., by the way.." The person who said was "Dr. Kenny" shook Astro's hand.
"The Dr. Kenny! You're a legend to me!" Astro beamed.
"It's nothing kid, hey.. if you ever want a little tweaking or repairs, here's my card, I won't charge you since I've known you since you were Tobio.."
"You, have?"
"Well, maybe not literally, but when your father took head position, he was practically a celebrity and the press loved him, and they loved you too…"
"Well, what do you mean by 'tweaking'?"
"I do all kinds of repairs. Nothing is impossible for Finian Kenny. It's funny how someone far less intelligent than me went and achieved more than anyone smarter than either of us."
"I assume you don't work for the ministry..."
"No, I work alone. Self employed."
"Hmm... maybe I will give you a call, I just need time to think about it…"
"Anything you want, it's yours kid.. Don't even need to ask, just tell and I'll do my magic…"
"Wow, cool!" Astro smiled.
"Well, I better get going, see ya around!" Dr. Kenny ran off again.
Astro examined the card given to him closely and observed all the details on it.
"Maybe he can fix me, stop me from being crazy."
Haha, what do you mean by that?
"You know… I'm just not myself.. i wonder if he knows why…"
Eh… if he does, he does, if he doesn't… he just doesn't…
"You're just saying that because you like controlling me.."
I- I-It's not that! I just…
"What?"
Ahh.. you'll never understand…
"Pfft.. whatever…" Astro continued on..
"I'm back!" Astro walked into the small apartment, Atom was sitting on the floor watching TV in the living room.
"Ooh, whatcha watching?" Astro asked, he walked over and sat next to Atom.
"Just something random..." Atom shrugged solemnly.
"What's wrong?"
"Nothing... I just, I should've really apologized to Kaitlyn for being a jerk the day she called you over, but I just don't know how..."
"Well... How do you normally apologize to people?"
"I just say I'm sorry, but I need to be more genuine... If I just say 'sorry' it won't be enough and it'll just sound like I could care less, when I don't!"
"Hmmm... Wish I could help you, but apologizing isn't really my thing, you can try and ask Brianna.."
Atom quietly nodded his head and got up to go see Brianna.
…
Finian walked through the door of his apartment after the long walk home.
Quinn stopped in his tracks and put the rag in his hand down at the sound of the door opening, turning around with a big smile.
"Oh your back, and still alive!" He greeted.
"Yeah… wish I wasn't but oh well, guess things just don't pan out for ya…"
Finian walked into the apartment, quickly noticing how spotless it was.
"... what did you do?" He sounded confused with a genuine concern.
Quinn looked over at Finian again with a wide smile.
"I uh…I cleaned!"
Finian, annoyed, closed the door behind him and walked up to the counter.
"This isn't one of your 'cleaning frenzies' is it?"
"Pffftttt whaaatttttt? Noooooo… well maybe… yeah." Quinn shamefully looked down at the counter.
Finian rolled his eyes, still annoyed.
"You know… having a clean place isn't worth shit when you're dead."
"But it's a great thing to go down in history for!" Quinn pointed, lookin back up at Finian.
With another hand to the face, Finian cringed for what seemed to be the millionth time that day.
"Listen… having this place be clean is nice, but having a spotless house isn't going to get you a job anywhere, especially the ministry."
"Yeah… didn't you get fired from there?"
"... that's not the point- do you think they just hired me because I wrote 'I have a nice house and suck dick for five hours straight'?!"
"... I would assume so, yes." Quinn slowly nodded.
Finian sighed with yet another cringe and a hand to the face, again.
"You're full of shit you know that right?" He pointed at Quinn.
Quinn bursted into a chuckle as Finian walked away, slowing shaking his head.
"But you still love me!" He called out.
"Yes… as ironic as it sounds, I still do." Finian looked behind him with a smirk before continuing on his way down the hallway.
Quinn turned away from the counter to face the sink, chuckling some more as he turned the water on and grabbed a few dirty dishes.
…
"Well…. just be genuine, if sorry doesn't cut it then maybe she's not taking you seriously?" Brianna put her nail filer down on the nightstand.
Atom sighed.
"Look, if it doesn't work out, at least you had good intentions, right?"
"... Yeah, I guess so."
Astro walked into the room.
"Y'all fuckers still alive?" He asked sarcastically.
Brianna burst into a laugh, getting up from the bed and walking to Astro.
Atom saw where this was going and stood up from sitting on the floor to leave the room, and to his predictions, Brianna was already in another make out session with Astro.
He sat down on the couch in the living room, trying to hold his tears in.
"Just… tell her you're sorry…. is that so hard?"
Atom sighed, there was no use in feeling bad at this point, he knew what he had to do regardless of how cheesy it may come across to Kaitlyn.
…
Quinn set two plates down on the table and sat himself down at one end, staring at the door, and then at his food. Finian walked out of the hallway as if to go into the kitchen but saw his plate on the table.
"Dinner?" He asked
"What?" Quinn looked up at Finian, his mouth overflowing with spaghetti.
Finian shrugged and sat down.
There were a few moments of silence and silverware clanking on ceramic plates before Quinn spoke up.
"So…. how was your day?"
"I died inside." Finian replied, stone faced and monotone.
"Again?" The redhead joked. He chuckled for a moment. "No, seriously. Anything interesting?"
"I met Astro on my way home."
"Astro!? The ASTRO?! Astro Boy?!" Quinn nearly spit out the food he was eating.
Finian nodded with a shrug, twisting his fork in the spaghetti on his plate.
"Wow! I had no idea he lived in the Underground City now… That couldn't possibly mean… he lives here, too, could it?"
"Doesn't sound like him... Unless he's here to foil yet another one of my evil plans!" Finian slammed his fist on the table, sending his fork flying into the air and onto the floor.
There was a moment of silence before Quinn snorted. The two of them broke out into mild laughter.
"You're cleaning that up, by the way." Quinn pointed to the floor.
"Uh…."
…
The next day, Astro headed out on his walk again, this time with a water bottle in hand and music blasting in his ears.
He referenced the business card in his hand for a hot second before shoving it back into the back pocket of his black skinny jeans.
Where we heading to today?
"Not now."
Oh come on, I'd like to keep being informed on your whereabouts, I am, in fact, apart of you…
"And?" Astro opened his water bottle and took a huge gulp.
Well-
"How about you just shove it and sit your ass down, huh? I'm fucking tired of you, and I'm tired of this bullshit, I takes these walks so I don't jump off a bridge and die, and yet you're still here talking shit like all this progress doesn't matter…."
HEY! YOU BE CAREFUL WHO YOU'RE TALKING TO, ASSHOLE!
Astro turned the music up louder and kept walking
He turned a corner and was met with more tall buildings and beautiful architecture.
…
"You're lucky you have me here, you know." Quinn said to Finian as he organized the scattered papers on the counter.
"This is why I only let you in here once a week..." Finian cringed as Quinn moved more and more of his precious research into separate piles.
"I will never understand how you do work in these conditions..." He turned around to take some tools to the shelves on the other side of the room and looked up at Finain in the process.
"Stop cringing so much, you'll get wrinkles." Quinn lightly tapped the doctor's face with his free hand as he walked by him.
Suddenly, they heard a knock at the front door.
"You didn't say there would be any clients coming in today..."
"I didn't have anybody scheduled."
"Guess I'm just going to have to go and shoo them away, seeing as how busy we are here." Quinn gestured at the mess of an office before leaving the room.
Finian sighed and picked up some of his tools, continuing what Quinn was doing.
"We don't take walk-in's. Sor-" Quinn opened the front door to see Astro standing outside, giving the man a confused look.
"Oh, wrong address? Shit."
"Oh! Astro? You're here for Finn?"
"Uhhhh, no… I'm here to die actually, but thanks for the concern." Astro replied sarcastically.
"We um… don't do that here…."
"... that was sarcasm…." Astro blinked.
"Oh! Ah. Would you like to come in?"
"Sure, got nothing to lose…"
"He'll be out in a moment, just make yourself at home." Quinn walked into the hallway, leaving Astro to himself.
"Cool."
"Astro is here..." Quinn poked his head into the office.
"He is?" Finian seemed somewhat taken aback. "I did give him my business card… But I didn't think he'd be here so soon..."
"Well, get your butt out there and see what he wants. I have to take care of this..." Quinn opened the door and walked in while Finian made his way out.
"Hello, Astro. Sorry if Quinn gave you any problems. We weren't expecting anyone today." Finn walked into the waiting room, adjusting his necktie.
"It's fine, I'm already dying on the inside so mild inconveniences don't phase me…"
"... Same."
Astro burst into a chuckle.
"So, how can I help you?"
Astro shrugged.
"Very descriptive."
"Hmmm yeah, I should write a book about that, call it 'The Shrug™'" Astro waved his hands in a whimsical manner.
"Interesting. Now if you could tell me why you've stopped by, that would be wonderful, seeing as you likely didn't come just to waste my time."
Astro contemplated for a moment.
"I...I don't know actually…. Must have forgotten…." He didn't speak as enthusiastically as he had before.
"Ah. Well, I guess talking with you would be better than watching Quinn clean the office." Finian sat down in the seat opposite of Astro.
"Kool." Astro rolled his shoulders back and sighed.
"You live in the city now?"
"Uhhh… yeah! I do, for now…"
"With whom?"
"Oh, just my girlfriend, nothing fancy schmancy."
"I see. Have you seen your father lately?"
"PFFFFFFTTTTTTT! No."
Finn wanted to sigh in relief but kept it inside.
"So you have a girlfriend?" He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees and lacing his fingers together.
Astro looked down at Finian's hands for a split second. He gazed down again, having noticed a silver band on the doctor's left ring finger.
"You're married?"
Finian looked down at his own hand. "Yes."
"Haha. Who's the lucky lady?"
He pointed his thumb behind his shoulder, in the direction of the hallway. "Him."
"Oh." Astro tried not to look shocked, although he was.
"Shocking?" Finian smirked.
"Yeah, pretty much…"
"I FINISHED!" Quinn ran into the room, hyperventilating.
Finan and Astro stared at him for a moment.
"Congrats." Astro sarcastically replied.
"What a good wife." Finian stood up.
"What?" Quinn looked confused and slightly embarrassed.
"Lucky lady!" Astro exclaimed in a joking manner.
"Did I miss something?"
"Yeah the dinosaurs." Astro had decided not to speak anymore after that terrible joke.
"I.. I'm really confused right now."
"Forget about it..." Finn patted Quinn on the shoulder before leaving a kiss on his cheek.
"Um… ok..."
"Shall we move the conversation to the office?" Finian looked at Astro then Quinn.
"I dunno, why not?" Astro shrugged.
Finian walked into the hallway, expecting the others to follow. Astro stood to his feet and walked closely behind.
"I uh guess you want me to come too, right? Right." Quinn looked back at the two before catching up with them.
"...maybe….." Astro looked at him and tried not to laugh.
They all made their way into the office and each took a seat.
"Damn… this is fancy... "
"Of course it is, and it would stay that way if someone kept it clean." Quinn crossed his arms.
Finian rolled his eyes and handed a booklet to Astro. "Maybe you can get an idea for what you want if you look through this."
"Oh." Astro took the book and looked through it, canceling out Finian blab on about what was in the book and Quinn constantly moving to clean smudges off of the counter.
You're not really going to go through with this are you?
If Astro were alone, he could respond, for now he flipped through more pages and sighed.
Astro? Astro? You're not going through with this are you?! YOU'RE NOT GETTING RID OF ME!
Astro cringed for a moment when Conscience yelled, he then returned to flipping through pages, trying to shake off his emotions.
DON'T YOU DARE DO IT YOU FUCKING BITCH!
Astro slammed the book shut.
"Oh. Have you decided wha-"
"Fix me."
"Fix you? What is broken?" Finian stood up from his seat.
"Everything." He muttered.
"That's impossible... You seemed to be functioning properly." The doctor looked him over.
YOU'RE NOT GOING THROUGH WITH THIS YOU HEAR ME?! I AM NOT GOING DOWN WITHOUT A FIGHT YOU KNOW! DON'T YOU DARE HAVE ME MAKE THINGS WORSE FOR YOU!
Astro seemed to be under a lot of pressure, sighing, he tried not to cry or lose his cool.
JESUS, I LEAVE YOU ALONE FOR ONE SECOND AND NOW YOU'RE READY TO TRASH ME? FUCK YOU AND FUCK YOUR FEELINGS YOU'RE A PIECE OF SHIT AND I HOPE YOU REGRET THIS!
"Astro? Are you alright?" Quinn looked at the boy with concern.
Astro ignored him and tried to ward off Conscience.
He shook his head and sighed, trying not to give into the depression emotions.
"Maybe it's his programming..." Finian thought outloud.
SHIT SHIT THIS IS WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT ASTRO, YOU NEED TO GET UP AND LEAVE, THIS BITCH IS GOING TO FUCK YOU UP, ABORT ABORT!
"...maybe…" Astro replied.
What?! Don't give into him!? We're trying to get you out of this, not deeper down the rabbit hole!
"Finn?" Quinn looked at his husband as he prepared to look through the boy's data.
"What?"
"Can I speak to you in the hall, please?"
"Can't you see I'm busy..."
"Finian..."
"... Fine..." He followed Quinn out the door and into the hallway.
Astro felt a slight relief when they left, letting out a sigh.
LOOK WHAT YOU GOT YOURSELF INTO?!
"Shut up!" Astro pulled at his hair. "Shut up Shut up Shut up Shut up Shut up Shut up Shut up Shut up Shut up Shut up Shut up! I don't give a shit now please leave me alone before I have a mental breakdown!"
I'M NOT DONE WITH YOU, I'M GONNA MAKE YOU PAY FOR THIS!
Tears streamed down Astro's face as he couldn't take the abuse anymore. "... Is this what you wanted? Are you happy seeing me suffer now?!"
Oh no…. THIS is only the beginning…
"You asshole!"
Really? Asshole? THAT'S all you got? Try and be more creative next time huh sweetheart?
Astro groaned. "I don't have time for this!"
"Quinn… what could you possibly need? I was about to figure out what his problem was."
"You can't fix him."
"Why not? Don't you like seeing robots get better?"
"Yes. But… What if someone notices his change… We could be found out..."
"You're right..."
"It's bad enough having to run away from my family for this. I don't want to lose you, too..." He rested his head on Finian's chest.
"Ok. I'll tell him I can't do it." Finn wrapped his arms around Quinn and rested his chin in his curly ginger hair.
"Thank you..." Quinn's voice cracked.
Finian gave the man a kiss on the forehead before walking back into the room.
"I'm sorry, Astro. But I can't fix you."
HA! AND HERE YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE SO CLOSE AHAHAHAHAHAHA JOKES ON YOU ASSHOLE!
"Oh…. Okay." Astro didn't seem phased.
"I hope what's broken isn't an emergency… but that is very unlikely."
"Eh… it'll probably blow over anyways…." Astro shrugged.
"If you have any more problems, don't be afraid to stop by." Finian led the boy to the front door.
"Yeah…"
You come back I'm taking over and killing you.
"Farewell."
Astro waved goodbye with a forced smiled and went down the elevator.
…
Atom sat at the counter with his phone in his hand, ready to dial Kaitlyn.
He sighed, still worrying if whatever he says just won't be enough in Kaitlyn's eyes.
What if the damage could never be undone?
Regardless, he pressed the call button on the screen and held the phone to his ear.
The ringing tone was heard for a while before the sound of a phone being picked up was heard.
"Kaitlyn?" Atom asked.
No response.
Atom sighed.
"...Atom?"
"Kaitlyn!" Atom exclaimed suddenly.
"I-I…." He sighed, not being able to make sentences.
"I'm sorry….."
"What?"
"I'm sorry for Winter break- for what I did! I-I-I didn't mean to be rude I just- I listened to Astro and got all caught up and the-"
"It's OK…."
"But-But…"
"Look, it's all in the past now, let's get over it."
Atom sighed. "You're right…. Thanks."
Kaitlyn sighed.
"You… OK?"
"Yeah…. Never felt better!"
Atom sighed again and stood up from the chair he was seated in, walking over to the living room and falling to the ground.
"Couldn't agree more…."
Astro walked into the house and shut the door behind him, then scurried off to his room.
You are in big trouble mister!
"What? So I didn't listen all the way through, big deal!"
This isn't about that- you went to him and talked about getting fixed, you know what that means for me!?
"Look… It's for the best I'd get it done, but I got turned down anyways, does that make you happy?"
If I could sigh I would.
"And if I could beat your ass, I would."
Softly.
Astro sat down in his chair and looked down at the carpet with a small smile of interest. "Softly." he chuckled to himself.
Hey, don't get too ahead of yourself!
Astro's cheeks went pink "Shut up."
…
Astro knocked on the door again, waiting a few moments before it opened.
"Oh, it's you again!" Quinn smiled after opening the door.
"One and only!" Astro remarked. "Actually I'm kidding, there's nothing special about me, I'm a huge disappointment…" He walked inside.
"So what brings you by again?"
"The sweet sweet craving of death…."
"Sorry, we don't have that."
"Aw, bummer." Astro let out a small chuckle.
"Would you like anything to eat? A drink, maybe?"
"Nah I'm good." Astro casually plopped onto the couch.
"You have a nice couch…" He commented, feeling its textured fabric with his hands.
"Thank you!"
"Whale cum." Astro smiled.
"So… can I help you with anything? Would you like to see the doctor?"
"What's the meaning of life?"
Quinn stood there with his mouth slightly agape as if he was about to say something but nothing came out and he stared at Astro in confusion.
"Oh no, I'm asking for my girlfriend, she has a paper due on the meaning of life, I wouldn't know, I'm not human."
"... I don't know either, buddy…."
"Welp then she's screwed…." Astro carelessly shrugged.
"The things they have kids do essays on these days..."
"Agreed…"
"So how is your guy's sex life?"
"Excuse me?"
"Nothing… I said nothing…." Astro stared off into the distance.
"Oh! Astro! Why didn't you tell me he was here?" Finian walked out of the kitchen and into the room.
"Ahh-"
"I dunno, he has issues- you know what the meaning of life is? Asking for my girlfriend."
"You really want to ask me that question?"
"Well yeah, what other humans do I know?"
"Sex. It's sex."
"FINIAN!" Quinn slapped the man on the arm, his face flushed red.
"I knew it!" Astro exclaimed.
"No no no!" Quinn waved his hands frantically.
"Great I'll text her now." Astro pulled his phone out to text Brianna.
Quinn brought his hands to his face and sighed loudly.
"You don't agree? We do it practically every other night..." Finian turned to Quinn, who was ready to melt into a puddle on the carpet.
"Ha-oh shit." Astro commented as he texted away.
"Why did I marry you?"
"What are you talking about!? You're the one that wanted to get married so badly! I told you it was ridiculous! Why don't you ever listen to me?"
Astro was trying his hardest to not laugh as he overheard their conversation while texting.
"Oh shit. She doesn't believe me. I'll just show her video proof." Astro turned on his camera and pointed his phone towards the two men.
"This guy," Astro pointed to Finian with his free hand, "Is the one that said the meaning of life is sex."
"I'm a scientist. I can confirm it to be true."
"He can confirm the truth….."
Quinn turned around and rested his forehead on the wall, giving up on life.
"And then this one is his trusty ginger sidekick….. Not sure what he's for…"
"Oh. I think Quinn wants to demonstrate." Finian walked over and grabbed Quinn's pants as if to pull them down.
"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING!?" He turned around quickly, holding onto his pants, keeping them as far up as they could go. "HE IS A CHILD!"
"Jesus you're only here for a hot second and it's like you entered a porno…." Astro tried his hardest not to laugh
"Oh yeah. Shit." Finian took a step back.
Astro fell off the couch dying of laughter.
"And that folks, is proof that the meaning of life is 'sex'!" He said, laughing, after flipping the camera to facecam and ending the video.
"She's gonna fucking love this! OH MY GOD! She could add this to her project and show the whole class!"
"AHHHHHHHH NOOOOOOOOOO!" Quinn looked as if his head was about to explode.
He ran over and grabbed Astro's phone, deleting the video before it could be sent.
"We are not doing this!" His voice cracked. "This is a morally upstanding house and we will not have such things!"
Astro had a hand over his mouth to stop his laughter, obviously not taking Quinn seriously.
Finian joined Astro in laughing. "Quinn…. Why do you tell yourself these lies?" He said between chuckles.
"...Oh shit ouch… talk about...r...roast…."
"You want to get arrested for pornography and pedophilia, then sure! Call me from your prison cell!"
"Sure, what do I have to lose?"
"ME!" Quinn ran into the hallway and a door could be heard being opened aggressively and slammed closed.
Finn immediately stopped laughing.
"Whelp, all I gotta say is we darn fucked, huh? No pun intended."
"Would you shut the fuck up for a second, boy?"
Astro stared at the ceiling.
Finian sighed and walked after Quinn.
"...Guess she's not getting that paper done…" Astro muttered to himself as he watched Finian leave. "Wait shit… I need my phone back, whoops… Oh well, I gotta run a few errands anyways…" Astro got up from the couch and casually left.
"I can't believe you did that… this is so embarrassing..." Quinn slowly walked down the hallway and to the waiting room, his hands over his face.
"You know I'm bad with children… Besides, he's a robot. His age is only theoretical." Finn followed closely behind.
"Yes. He is a robot. And his mental age is 3 times his physical age. You almost fucked me in front of a 5 year old. Do you know how many laws this has broken? This is so immoral. I feel sick."
"Quinn…. Please…."
"No Finian. I-... Where'd he go?" They walked into the room to see it empty. "Look what you've done! You've traumatized him and now he's run off!" He waved his hands in the air.
"Quinn… You still have his phone..." Finian looked at Quinn's hands as he moved them frantically.
"What? Oh…. This is a problem…."
…
Astro came back home another day with bags in his hands, he saw Brianna sitting on the couch watching TV.
"Bought the stuff for dinner." He said
"Oh. Nice!" Brianna sat up and walked over to him.
She grabbed a bag and planted a kiss on his lips for a second.
Astro tried not to blush as he carried the rest of the bags to the kitchen.
"So did you ever get your phone back?" She asked.
"Yeah. I stopped by and they gave it back. Said they didn't know where I live and were waiting for me to visit again to hand it back." Astro shrugged, pulling a few things out of a grocery bag.
"Oh. That's good!" Brianna shimmied closer to Astro, her hip against his.
Astro out of an impulse grabbed Brianna by the arm and twirled her around.
"Hey! Ha! You didn't say we were gonna dance?!" She chuckled.
"Oh, right. We're dancing." Astro brought her out into the living room and danced with her some more.
Atom walked out of the hallway and saw Astro and Brianna to his right laughing as they struggled to keep the dancing momentum.
"Need help?" He asked, walking over to the TV.
"I dunno." Astro shrugged.
Atom tried not to laugh as he changed the channel.
Brianna finally stopped and pulled Astro in for a kiss, Atom had already accepted the fact that Brianna was know to go from 0-100 quite rapidly and thus kept his cool.
They broke off the kiss and Astro walked back into the kitchen, red-faced, continuing to put away the groceries.
((END OF CHAPTER 1!))