A short little fic, I hope you guys enjoy ;)
I'm dedicating this one to patientalien, a wonderful writer and an extremely talented person :)
How could he? Forgive me after what I've done? After the terrible, awful mistake.
The faces of the dead play through my mind, a slideshow of horror and suffering. I can hear still hear the terrified screams of those innocent people, and sub-consciously I sink to the ground, kneeling on the cold floor of the Resolute. I'm in the quarters me and Obi-Wan share, and I'm almost trembling out of fear. How can Obi-Wan possibly forgive me after the mistake I made down on Shili? That entire village is gone because I was too blind to see it was a trap.
All those people, dead. Women, children. Dead. Gone forever. I feel a shiver run down my spine, and I curl up in the corner of my bedroom. The Clone War began only two months ago, and already I've messed up, costing the Jedi a crucial victory, getting hundreds of innocents slaughtered. If only I wasn't so stupid, so reckless.
I can't help but wonder why Obi-Wan's kept me as his apprentice for this long. Surely if he had known I was capable of getting so many killed, he would've sent me back long ago. I think about how he's going to react when he hears of my failure, and I let my head sink onto my knees. He's never going to want to keep me as his Padawan, not now, not after what I've done. I've disappointed him in the past, but those incidents were nothing compared to this.
I hear the door to the apartment open, and I ball my body up tighter, just wanting to shrink away into nothing. The faces of the dead still play in my mind, even though my eyes are closed. I hear approaching footsteps, and then the voice of Obi-Wan call out. "Anakin, where are you?" His voice sounds strained, and I know that he's learned of the mission's results. He knows I got all those people killed. He knows what a failure and disappointment I am.
"Anakin? Anakin, I need to talk to you." His voice is closer, and then, the door to the bedroom slides open.
I peek up, and see him look around the room. I'm being childish, being pathetic, but I can't face him. Not now. I don't think he sees me, he turns to leave, look elsewhere for his failure of a student, when I lose my grip on my mental shields. Just for a split second.
It's enough. He feels the ripple in the Force, and looks in my direction. Immediately, I see the pain and disappointment in his expression and I close my eyes, looking down.
"Anakin." I hear him take a deep, shaky breath, and I know he's searching for the right words to say. Just say it. Tell me what a monster I am, getting all those innocents killed. I might as well have slain them myself. Just say it. Say how much you can't stand to look at me.
I hear more footsteps, and then the creaking of a mattress. He's sitting on the bed now, preparing to talk to me. Ready to tell me that I'm being sent to the Temple, that I've failed as his Padawan.
There's just silence, though, and that's even more unnerving. Nothing but the sounds of our heavy breathing. Finally, I can't take it anymore. "I'm sorry." Surely those two little words won't matter to him, and my voice is so quiet he probably couldn't hear me anyway – but I feel a little better saying it. A little. I add more. "I'm so, so sorry, Master."
Obi-Wan sucks in a sharp breath. And then, I hear him speak.
"Come here, son."
That statement catches me by surprise so much I choke on my own breath. Slowly, I look up, and through tears I see Obi-Wan, his arms outstretched, his expression not angry but forgiving, comforting, and sympathetic. Hesitantly, reluctantly, I get to my feet, and walk over to him, kneeling on the floor near where he's sitting. In this position, I can look right into his eyes.
He's not angry. Not hateful. Not at all.
What happens next shocks me even more. He wraps his arms around me, and then just holds me in that embrace, sending soothing, comforting pulses through the Force. That's when I finally just break down, clinging to him almost desperately. "I-I'm so sorry, Master." I feel like a fool, sobbing and losing control like this, but I can't hold it in any longer.
He doesn't seem to mind, doesn't push me away or scold me. "It's gonna be alright, Anakin," he whispers into my ear, still holding me, gently swaying back and forth.
This man, my Master, suddenly transforms into the father I've always wanted, and I lean against him as his warmth and his love slowly forces the images of the dead out of my mind. I feel the horror of the mission fade away into the Force, and my sobs turn into cries of both relief and just plain exhaustion. He doesn't let go, doesn't waver, just holds onto me with his strong arms, shushing me, telling me it'll be alright. He doesn't hate me, don't even blame me.
He loves me, I love him like a father, and he still calls me son.
Did you like it? Hope you did. Yea, just a quick little thing 'bout Anakin and Obi-Wan. Please review! :)