Chapter I
In the Dark
Legolas stood bound in chains in a dark dungeon in Middle-Earth. He could barely see anything, even his feet below him seemed to be one with the darkness. His legs could hold him up no longer, they were beginning to falter, but his wrists were chained to the wall to prevent him the luxury of sitting down. He had not slept in days…weeks, perhaps; time had all run together, days felt like weeks, and weeks felt like years…and he could have been standing there for eternity for all he knew. He was on the verge of dozing off, when he heard the voice of Saruman outside his cell. Immediately as he recognized Saruman's voice, he began to thrash out and struggle in his binds; he did not want the enemy to think he had given up. Legolas watched as Saruman entered his room, smiling with pleasure.
"Ah, Legolas, still fighting I see. You know, struggling will not help, instead it will wear our your energy before your time has come. That's right," he smirked, "until the time when I will transform you into an orc. Sounds delightful, doesn't it?" He watched as Legolas labored over his metal chains.
"I will never be your servant, Saruman. I will gladly die before ever surrendering to your command," Legolas spat, his face dirtied with soil, sweat, and tears.
"We shall see about that, Legolas, we shall see…" Saruman motioned to his orc guards before exiting, and they gave Legolas a few cruel blows on his head with the butts of their scimitars to knock him out.
* * * * * *
"Psst!"
Legolas blinked a few times before regaining consciousness. He legs were weak and wobbly, and he could barely support himself. The areas where his handcuffs were on his wrists were red and sore, the skin worn away, leaving fresh sores and blisters.
"Legolas!"
Legolas looked up…the voice came from above.
"Gandalf?" Legolas was amazed, forgetting to whisper. The old wizard had climbed the rafters and was now crouched over the beams on the ceiling.
"Yes, but could you be a bit more discreet? The orcs aren't all that tipsy yet," Gandalf scolded, putting a finger to his lips and climbing agilely (at least for an old wizard) down to the floor.
"Oh, sorry. But what are you doing here? And how did you get in?" Legolas inquired, still in shock.
"Oh you know…a little this and that. First of all, I hired a prostitute to keep Saruman busy and I got a belly dancer to entertain the orcs. They're surprisingly good belly dancers, those orcs…" Gandalf said thoughtfully.
"Yes, that's well and all, but could you help me out here?" asked Legolas, redirecting Gandalf's attention.
"Oh right," Gandalf said, "about you. Well, this news might not be too good, but…I can't get you out," he said apologetically.
"What?!"
"You see, no matter how far we run, we will never be able to escape Saruman, and even light-footed elf that you are, as long as you are with me, he will be after us. Aragorn and I have come up with a plan. We will send you away, and during that time, we will do our best to rid Middle- Earth of Saruman and his orc friends," explained Gandalf.
"Send me away? Where?" asked Legolas, in a panic.
Gandalf got a look of reverie and longing in his eyes as he spoke. "Far, far away…"
"What?"
"Like I said," Gandalf resumed his yearning look, "far, far away…"
"What?"
"No time for questions!" Gandalf snapped, "Haven't you done your research?"
"What?"
Gandalf sighed. "Just shut up and listen. I will send you to another world, where you will become a new person, with a new identity, a new family, a new background, new friends, new possessions—"
"Yeah, okay."
"No interruptions! Like I was saying, I will send you to another world, where you will become a new person, with a new identity, a new family, a new background, new friends, new possessions —"
"Right, but after that…"
"Hush boy! I will send you to another world, where you will become a new person, with a new identity, a new family, a new background, new friends, new possessions, and a whole different life. Saruman will never think to search there. We must get started at once, I think Saruman might be getting bored," Gandalf instructed.
"OK, but when can I come back?" Legolas said, not bothering to hide his reluctance.
"When the time comes, I will call you back to Middle-Earth," said Gandalf.
Legolas argued, "But what if the time never comes?"
Gandalf thought for a moment, his eyes deep in concentration, "Well, then, you're screwed. In fact, we're all screwed."
Hmm… Legolas thought, would I rather be screwed in another world, or in Middle-Earth?
"OK, I'll go."
"Good," Gandalf said, "now, I will take this big stick here, and I'll say a couple of chants, and you will be transported far, far away…"
"Right."
Gandalf took his staff and pointed it at Legolas. He began to mumble a few chants, and the room lit up with a dim glow from the tip of the staff. The glow radiated to Legolas and surrounded him. Legolas began to feel himself fading away as Gandalf began to finish the last chant. All of a sudden, an enormous rodent sped by, and Gandalf's spell was interrupted.
"…rucAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Gandalf shrieked. But then immediately realized that he had messed up the spell, and as he tried to correct it by reversing it so he could start over, he discovered it was too late. Legolas was gone.
In the Dark
Legolas stood bound in chains in a dark dungeon in Middle-Earth. He could barely see anything, even his feet below him seemed to be one with the darkness. His legs could hold him up no longer, they were beginning to falter, but his wrists were chained to the wall to prevent him the luxury of sitting down. He had not slept in days…weeks, perhaps; time had all run together, days felt like weeks, and weeks felt like years…and he could have been standing there for eternity for all he knew. He was on the verge of dozing off, when he heard the voice of Saruman outside his cell. Immediately as he recognized Saruman's voice, he began to thrash out and struggle in his binds; he did not want the enemy to think he had given up. Legolas watched as Saruman entered his room, smiling with pleasure.
"Ah, Legolas, still fighting I see. You know, struggling will not help, instead it will wear our your energy before your time has come. That's right," he smirked, "until the time when I will transform you into an orc. Sounds delightful, doesn't it?" He watched as Legolas labored over his metal chains.
"I will never be your servant, Saruman. I will gladly die before ever surrendering to your command," Legolas spat, his face dirtied with soil, sweat, and tears.
"We shall see about that, Legolas, we shall see…" Saruman motioned to his orc guards before exiting, and they gave Legolas a few cruel blows on his head with the butts of their scimitars to knock him out.
* * * * * *
"Psst!"
Legolas blinked a few times before regaining consciousness. He legs were weak and wobbly, and he could barely support himself. The areas where his handcuffs were on his wrists were red and sore, the skin worn away, leaving fresh sores and blisters.
"Legolas!"
Legolas looked up…the voice came from above.
"Gandalf?" Legolas was amazed, forgetting to whisper. The old wizard had climbed the rafters and was now crouched over the beams on the ceiling.
"Yes, but could you be a bit more discreet? The orcs aren't all that tipsy yet," Gandalf scolded, putting a finger to his lips and climbing agilely (at least for an old wizard) down to the floor.
"Oh, sorry. But what are you doing here? And how did you get in?" Legolas inquired, still in shock.
"Oh you know…a little this and that. First of all, I hired a prostitute to keep Saruman busy and I got a belly dancer to entertain the orcs. They're surprisingly good belly dancers, those orcs…" Gandalf said thoughtfully.
"Yes, that's well and all, but could you help me out here?" asked Legolas, redirecting Gandalf's attention.
"Oh right," Gandalf said, "about you. Well, this news might not be too good, but…I can't get you out," he said apologetically.
"What?!"
"You see, no matter how far we run, we will never be able to escape Saruman, and even light-footed elf that you are, as long as you are with me, he will be after us. Aragorn and I have come up with a plan. We will send you away, and during that time, we will do our best to rid Middle- Earth of Saruman and his orc friends," explained Gandalf.
"Send me away? Where?" asked Legolas, in a panic.
Gandalf got a look of reverie and longing in his eyes as he spoke. "Far, far away…"
"What?"
"Like I said," Gandalf resumed his yearning look, "far, far away…"
"What?"
"No time for questions!" Gandalf snapped, "Haven't you done your research?"
"What?"
Gandalf sighed. "Just shut up and listen. I will send you to another world, where you will become a new person, with a new identity, a new family, a new background, new friends, new possessions—"
"Yeah, okay."
"No interruptions! Like I was saying, I will send you to another world, where you will become a new person, with a new identity, a new family, a new background, new friends, new possessions —"
"Right, but after that…"
"Hush boy! I will send you to another world, where you will become a new person, with a new identity, a new family, a new background, new friends, new possessions, and a whole different life. Saruman will never think to search there. We must get started at once, I think Saruman might be getting bored," Gandalf instructed.
"OK, but when can I come back?" Legolas said, not bothering to hide his reluctance.
"When the time comes, I will call you back to Middle-Earth," said Gandalf.
Legolas argued, "But what if the time never comes?"
Gandalf thought for a moment, his eyes deep in concentration, "Well, then, you're screwed. In fact, we're all screwed."
Hmm… Legolas thought, would I rather be screwed in another world, or in Middle-Earth?
"OK, I'll go."
"Good," Gandalf said, "now, I will take this big stick here, and I'll say a couple of chants, and you will be transported far, far away…"
"Right."
Gandalf took his staff and pointed it at Legolas. He began to mumble a few chants, and the room lit up with a dim glow from the tip of the staff. The glow radiated to Legolas and surrounded him. Legolas began to feel himself fading away as Gandalf began to finish the last chant. All of a sudden, an enormous rodent sped by, and Gandalf's spell was interrupted.
"…rucAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Gandalf shrieked. But then immediately realized that he had messed up the spell, and as he tried to correct it by reversing it so he could start over, he discovered it was too late. Legolas was gone.