One Moment
As Kevin walked out her door, she cried a tear. Not for what she had with Kevin, but for what was lost long before. Before Kevin, before Pete, before her move to Los Angeles, before Alex, even before Mark came back into her life. The tear she cried was not even for her failed marriage to Derek. The tear was for one moment, seemingly ages away, one moment when Addison Forbes Montgomery was kissed with such love and adoring that her world could have stopped then and she would have known true happiness. One moment when everything seemed possible, one moment when she was loved for the sake of being loved not for who she was, one moment before the love she was given turned to distrust. The tear fell for what could have been, what should have been with Isobel Stevens.
The tear continued to slowly fall as a moonlit night came to her mind. A night unlike any other, the Seattle sky was clear, filled with stars, not a cloud to be seen. Addison was leaving Seattle Grace for the day when the intern approached her with questions about a case involving quintuplets they had been working on. Isobel Stevens had intrigued Addison from day one, she found her captivating and had longed know the intern on a more personal level, but what happened that night was so unexpected and yet so natural that it should have been expected. Addison couldn't tell you today what Izzie was asking her, but she could tell you just how the intern's eyes sparkled in the moonlight, the exact spot of the dimple in her check as she smiled, and how the slight wind blew the wisps of golden blond hair into her beautiful face. She could tell you how it was out of her control when her hand reached up to smooth the intern's hair back, how her fingers took on a life of their own as they ran down the blonde's cheek to her lips. And as the intern's lips parted in a sigh there was no stopping Addison's heart as she leaned in and claimed those lips as her own.
With tears flowing freely now, Addison remembers the intern's arms wrapping around her to pull her closer and deepen the kiss filling it with promise of forever. Addison had never felt so loved and wanted before, she never wanted this feeling to end. She had found where she belonged, in one moment she knew what her life had been missing. Lips against each other, tongues battling for entrance. Her breath ragged as Izzie pulled away just long enough to begin her assault on Addison's neck, her fingernails grazing over the resident's back. It was then, for just one moment Addison opened her eyes, bringing her back to the reality that they were standing in the entrance of Seattle Grace for any and all to see.
As quickly as the kiss had begun it stopped. Addison began leading an unsteady Izzie to the parking lot. Not a word was spoken between the two woman, it wasn't needed. They both knew their hearts had found their other half. As if agreeing, Addison led Izzie to her own car and got her seated in the driver's side. Leaning in and placing the briefest of kisses on the intern's lips Addison whispered, " after a few more days, after this case with the quints, when we aren't working as closely together, we will finish this. We be together Izzie, I promise you that." Addison had never meant any words as she did those whispered to her young intern and the response she got was worth more than could have ever been spoken. Izzie smiled, the biggest and brightest Addison had ever seen. Izzie's only reply was this smile, the smile that would haunt Addison everyday from that night on.
The next time she saw Izzie she was leaving her with the dying quint for the night, hoping that by the next morning Izzie would understand why she as the resident had to put the young intern through this pain. Walking out of the hospital knowing what was going to happen was one of the hardest things Addison had ever done before. Knowing that even though she was doing the right thing for the intern she very well could be doing the one thing that could push her new love away. All night she paced her hotel room, deciding to go to Izzie and tell her the truth and then changing her mind over and over.
When morning came and she found Izzie asleep her heart broke. Fear as to what would happen when the intern learned the truth came crashing around her. And when her fears became reality as Izzie yelled at her without the love showing in her eyes, Addison knew that she had lost the one thing her heart yearned for as quickly as she had found it, in one moment.
Time at Seattle Grace moved on, Izzie to Denny and Addison back to trying with Derek, knowing she could never make it work, her heart only longing for Izzie, the one she could never have. Watching Izzie after Denny's death, and having her marriage finally over Addison felt helpless and alone. Even though after time they would converse and occasionally work together, Addison never felt Izzie would allow her recapture the magic from that night. So assuming Izzie wouldn't want her she fell back into the old habits of 'whoever was there would do". So first there was Mark and then Alex, neither of them being what she wanted, neither of them able to make her feel. Finally unable to deal with life at Seattle Grace any longer she moved on to Los Angeles at her friend Naomi's request, and hoped to leave the feelings of longing and loss behind her in Seattle.
So here she was, alone again, tears still falling for the one person who could complete her. The one person she could never get over, the kiss that still burned her lips. The tears stopped falling as realization came to her in a flash. It was time, Addison Forbes Montgomery had reached the moment when she knew, she had to return to Seattle and try to reclaim what could have been, what should have been… Isobel Stevens.