Oneshot.I just decided to write this, as I have been wondering why the Doctor never mentions Rose. I know he sees a hologram of her in the TARDIS, but that never happened in my story. Hope you enjoy it!
Also, this is my first entirely Doctor Who fanfic! :)
Oh, and just to point out, Amy and Rory aren't quite sure what The Doctor has substituted for raisins in his hot-cross buns. Not that it matters.
Disclamer: I don't own Doctor Who, or obviously, Rose would still be travelling with him. No. wait. I would! ;)
Amy and Rory were sitting in the TARDIS eating some of the Doctor's homemade hot cross buns, waiting for him to appear. They weren't sure what the time was, but they were both sure they had risen particularly early due to the fact their bunk beds were not as enjoyable to sleep in as the Doctor believed. But soon enough they heard the footsteps of a Timelord approaching the control room, and the two looked up as he began to speak, 'So! Where would you like to go today, Rose?'
Amy and Rory looked inquisitively at each other, who's Rose?
The Doctor clapped his hands together, a wide grin on his mischievous face, 'Guys?'
Rory looked at the Doctor; unsure of what had just happened, 'Um… Doctor, you just said… Rose?'
The Timelord looked between the two Ponds, his grin wiped from his face, his brow furrowed, replaying the last few seconds through his mind, 'So, I did.'
Amy and Rory looked at the Doctor, all of the happiness seemed to have been replaced with a heart-wrenching look of loss and sadness, a look they never wanted to see on the Doctors usually childish face.
'Doctor?' Amy asked, 'Who's Rose?'
The groans of the TARDIS were the only things filling the silence while the tweed-clad man descended onto the bottom steps of the TARDIS. He had forgotten Rose, but a large part of him knew he had subconsciously forced himself not to remember her; it was too painful. Ever since he was forced to say goodbye to his skinny-pinstripe old self, all memories of Rose seemed to have been taken from his head. He could see why now. At the event of one small mistake: simply saying her name, the walls he had built in his mind to forget her had come crashing down and everything they had done together, the feelings, the adventures, the laughs they had shared was all flooding back. She had been the best, the Doctor loved Rose and he could never see her again. His mind was being over washed with memories, pictures flashing through his head, so vivid and clear, he forgot The Ponds were there at all.
He could see her face, before it all began; he had looked into her eyes and said, 'run'. It was all so clear, the Doctor could hear his old voice, feel the touch of Rose's hand as he had taken it for the very first time.
The Doctor saw the memories of Rose and him dancing in the TARDIS the day they had first met Jack. He remembered regenerating in front of Rose, and opening his new eyes to see her for the first time in a different way;he loved Rose. Everything. Every day, moment, feeling, all of it, the stories they created together, the Doctor didn't know how he could bear it.
Rose's smile was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen, and her voice the most wonderful thing he could have ever heard.
He couldn't help but think of walking back into the TARDIS on Bad Wolf Bay, turning his back on Rose, and knowing she would not have to feel his pain, as she still had him.
Why didn't she hold on for just a little longer?
And she was flying. Flying away from him and screaming so hard. He was screaming her name but could no nothing. Nothing at all. And he watched his Rose Tyler fly away.
The Doctor lifted a hand up, an attempt to wipe away the floods of tears he just noticed were spilling from his eyes.
Amy and Roy couldn't believe what was happening; they had watched their unpredictable Doctor sit down on the stairs, hunched in pain. He had held his head in his hands in sorrow for something the two did not know. Amy and Rory looked at each other, concerned, the echo of the last thing they said still ringing about the TARDIS; Who's Rose? They looked back at the Doctor to see him lift his head up and were stricken by the vast amounts of tears flooding down his face. Amy saw a single drop fall from the edge of The Doctor's chin, when she realised he needed comforting; Why had she just been standing there?
Amy walked over and sat next to the crying man, wrapping an arm around him. The Doctor leaned into her, but could not stop his feelings and the memories, the overwhelming wish he could still be with Rose. He closed his eyes tight, trying to pretend that the comforting feel of Amy was instead Rose.
Rose.
Amy hugged the Doctor tighter, knowing that the answer to her question could wait.