Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural or any of its characters, I do however own Cali, Bridget and all others you do not know

A/N: Yep, another story. Katrina (Paper Roses and Candy Kisses) said she had an idea for a story and asked if I would like to use it. So this is originally her idea, only we both revamped it together. It wouldn't be nearly as good as it is without you! Thanks Katrina! Here's a Promo I made for the story - www [dot] youtube [dot] com/watch?v=XvteN2jWEIM
(Be warned, it's very spoilery!)

Summary: Everyone has something they want to forget, for Him its how he feels, but for her....it's him.

Hot water rained down on Cali as she tried to scrub away the stench and pain, though she knew she would never successfully rid herself of it. She had been out of Hell for a month but it was only going to get worse, that she knew.

A dazed look crossed over her pale face and her eyes got glossy.

"Cali?" Her sister, Bridget, called through the locked door.

She yelped as it startled her. Turning the water off she climbed from the shower on shaky legs.

"Cali? Are you okay?" Bridget's tone was sharp and protective.

"I'm fine." Cali spoke.

Though as she looked at herself in the mirror she knew she was as far from it as possible. Her face was sickly white, her eyes had dark bags and looked sunk in, she tried to keep her hair under control, in fact it would start out nice and then through out the day she would run her hands through it and pick at it rather nervously.

She felt like people knew by looking at her. That they could literally see her soul was charred and her body was broken.

Cali dressed slowly as she tried to avoid her eyes from the mirror, she no longer liked to look at herself.

She used to be sure of herself and knew who she was--before she died.

Cali's head jerked up, catching a glimpse of herself in the mirror she noticed a small spark in her eye.

Yanking open the bathroom door Cali took off down the hall to her bedroom, Bridget running after her.

Bridget's brows shot up when she stepped into her sister's room to see Cali throwing clothes into a suitcase. Cali had only left the house a handful of times since she was brought back--why was she packing the majority of her clothes?

"Cali?"

"Call Bobby!" Cali zipped her suitcase. "We're going hunting again."

Bridget shook her head. "I can't. I have Aimee--she's not even a year old."

She regretted saying it almost immediately as the spark left Cali's eyes.

"Okay. I'll go on my own." Cali shrugged.

Being brought back from Hell was enough. Seeing her sister moved on and had an amazing life? That just added onto her pain.

"I'll get Adam to watch her--"

"No, it's okay." Cali grabbed her bag and walked past Bridget, who followed her out to their Mother's black 1972 Plymouth Duster.

"I'll call you when I get there." Cali looked at her sister sadly for a moment or two before climbing into the car, firing it up and backing out of the driveway.

Sneaking a glance at her sister in the rear view mirror she sighed and flicked on the radio. Her face paled even more as Heaven Forbid played and sparking memories to come barreling forward. It made her remember that it was real--she didn't want it to be real.

Flicking off the radio she stuck to thinking of what to say to Bobby when she showed up.

A/N: Next chapter will be longer, this was just a bit of a teaser. Part two out either tonight or tomorrow!

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