Title: My Awkward Talk
Pairings: JDJanitor
Rating: T
Description: Janitor and JD have an awkward chat.
Author's Note: I wasn't sure what to rate this since it's just innocent talking, but I certainly didn't want some kid reading this because they would most likely be left with a bunch of questions. And that would not be a very comfortable conversation between child and parent is they decided to ask about it. :)
Warning: Suggestive themes but nothing more than suggestive.
"So, what do you think about condoms?" The janitor asked in a nonchalant tone of voice.
JD spit out his beer in surprise and looked at the other man with wide eyes. "W-What?" He sputtered, face turning red out of sheer embarrassment. He almost fell out of the swivel chair he was sitting on and had to grab at the bar counter to keep himself upright.
Asking questions such as that was not proper etiquette while sitting in a bar, trying to enjoy the company of your boyfriend. It is a question you'd ask at home, maybe even in bed, but not at a bar.
The Janitor rapped his knuckles against JD's forehead, "You in there, Scooter?"
I wish he wouldn't call me that, JD thought, turning his attention back to the other.
"What do you think about condoms?" He asked once more and slightly slower.
The doctor leaned towards him, "Not now!" He whispered.
"Why not?" Janitor asked; his head tilted to the side owlishly.
"Because!" He harshly whispered again.
"Common' Scooter, just tell me." He said, using that very urging voice with the little underlining of mischievous kind of tone.
"I'm not talking about this at a bar!" He was no longer whispering, and the bartender was now staring at him in an odd way along with several other people sitting at the bar counter.
"Ok, than, what do you think about guys having sex with each other?"
JD gapped, his face completely red and burning hotly. He covered his face with his hand and suddenly wanted to sink through the floor and be gone.
We see the janitor asking that same question, but this time JD sinks through his chair and through the floorboards. The only thing that is left of JD is his eyeballs and a small blue puddle that resembles his scrubs. The eyes roll over towards the janitor, who seems to be asking more embarrassing and awkward questions, looking down at JD's eyes in anticipation.
"Darn, I forgot that eyes don't liquefy so well!" JD quickly whispered to himself as he drifted out of his daydream.
Janitor raised his eyebrows and looked at him as if a large, man-eating rabit was sitting on his shoulder. He quickly ignored it, remembering that JD often had strange daydreams. "So, are you going to answer me or what?"
"Well, I dunno'. Eh, I guess I'm fine with it - Wait why am I talking about this? We are in a bar; this is no place to talk about this! Maybe when we're at your house, but not here!" JD said, fingers shaking very slightly.
He grinned, "Well, I guess we could go back home, even though right now, I'm a slight bit tipsy." He said, emphasizing the word 'tipsy' in a joking manner.
JD frowned. He hated when the Janitor drove when he was tipsy, just because he talked so much and often tried to woo him while driving, which was not safe.
"As before, what do you think about condoms?" Janitor asked him again, head resting on his palms and his elbows resting on the counter. He turned towards JD and smiled wider.
"W-Well, they are good because they protect you from getting HIV and Aids, and helps prevent pregnancy—"
The janitor burst out laughing, causing JD to stop talking, "Don't say that near Perry, he'll just claim you're a woman." He continued to cackle.
"W-Wait! Are you talking about us? You're talking about us aren't you? Hay, I thought we agreed that we wouldn't, you know, do that stuff until our relationship became... Stronger." JD whispered, still very flushed.
He whistled innocently, and ogled his eyes away from the doctor, "Whatever you say, Scooter." He tugged at his elbow and quickly pulled him off of the chair. He quickly slapped down the money for the beers they had and quickly pulled JD out of the bar and towards his van.
"Hay, where are you taking me?" JD yelled, trying to tug away from the janitor. It obviously didn't work, since the janitor was much stronger than the doctor.
"You know, back to my place…" He said; keeping his eyes locked on his van.
"What for?" JD held his breath.
He didn't reply, but JD could feel the aura around the janitor become excited.
Great…