Title: Glass Kiss
Rating: M (subject to change)
Pairing: Shizuo x Izaya
Disclaimer: I own none of these characters!
THIS STORY CONTAINS MALExMALE RELATIONSHIPS. You have been warned.
Izaya laughed in mockery at the witch who offered him eternal life for such small a price.
"Are you telling me that I can be an immortal and I would never die as long as I don't speak?" Orihara Izaya asked in amusement at the woman sitting in front of him. As an informant and a man who sought out supernatural beings and mystical arts, he had read upon and researched hundreds and thousands of lores, followed up and unearthed myths after myths to uncover the truth. But this, this sounded too easy.
"Yes."The old woman in a dark cloak replied. She sat in front of a crystal ball like any old fortune teller, her fingers thin with long crooked nails. She looked the part for sure. Izaya had gone to great lengths to find her, the rumored fortune teller who could not only foresee the future, but for the right price, she could grant your wishes. Each wish would cost something that was important to the person and in this case, she asked for his voice. Or more precisely, the ability to communicate using his voice.
The infamous Shinjuku informant tapped his fingers on the round table before him, the soft purple cloth muting his drumming.
"So, you're saying, that as long as I don't speak, I will not die? And that's my price?" Izaya repeated the question, slightly changing the wording on purpose.
"In a manner of speaking," The hood covered her eyes, but Izaya could see a tiny thin smile in the shadows.
"How will I die?" Izaya decided to ask further. He understood how the monkey's paw story went. He'd rather find out the exact price and punishment. After all, Izaya was sure that this 'wish' was more a curse rather than a miracle. But holy grail or no, he planned to overturn his fate no matter what the cost. His voice for eternal life felt too easy. Far too easy.
"The air you breath will turn to poison and will turn your lungs to ashes." Her voice sounded dead and cold.
"That's pretty descriptive." Izaya was not deterred by her intimidation, brushing it off as he did when Shiki took on a similar tone. In fact, he noted how precise those instructions were instead. He thought about it. "What if I sneezed, does that count?"
The witch shook her head, looking a bit peeved. Most would shudder when she delivered her curse with her chilling voice but no. This man had shrugged and asked, 'what if I sneezed?'
"Alright what about burping? That's okay too? What if someone poked me with a sharp object and I scream?" Izaya smirked as he felt a small irritation grow.
"Involuntary sounds, the wish will allow. But if you were to try to communicate with someone even through any sounds, the curse will take effect."
"Ah, what if I want to talk into an empty room? No one is listening so it's alright, right?" Izaya grinned innocently.
"No talking is allowed whether someone can hear you or not. Same will go for any recording devices." Yes, the woman was clearly getting annoyed by the twenty questions. However, Izaya had more. This was just the beginning.
"So as soon as I talk, suddenly the air I breathe will turn to poison? Will it take a few seconds before the curse take effect? How many seconds?" Izaya raised his hands and gave a shoulder shrug.
The witch rolled her eyes. At least, Izaya felt it behind her hood. But that meant something. Izaya was already forming a plan in his head, turning the idea over and over like a rubix cube which he knows how to turn to line up all the colors.
"Well, let's put that aside for now." Izaya waved it off as if he was changing the topic. "If I lose my voice, I can talk using sign language yes? And typing and texting?"
"Yes, that will be fine." The witch nodded.
"How about sleep talking? It wouldn't be voluntary after all." Izaya switched back to the same topic which he knew would annoy the hell out of her… and it did.
"Any involuntary sounds are allowed. I will allow sleep talking." The witch muttered.
"Oh whew, glad to hear that. It would suck if I end up dead after I go to bed you know?" Izaya chuckled. "So what happens if I'm buried alive? Or someone ties my feet with cement rock and throws me into Tokyo Bay?"
"You will still live. Forever." The witch smirked.
"Oh dear, I guess I'll make a mental note not to make too many enemies..." Izaya smiled easily but again he stashed that information in his head as he started to formulate a plan. "Does that mean I will feel the pain? Let's say I'm stabbed a million times…"
"You will feel every single pain. Being voiceless only grants eternal life, not being free from pain."
"And what's the cost to not feel any pain?" Izaya asked as he leaned forward with a Cheshire cat smile.
"I will take away your eyesight."
"Hmmm… to be mute and blind?" Izaya thought about it.
"Nah, I don't think I'll take that cost." Izaya shrugged as he sat back down, scratching his neck casually. "To be blind and mute forever? Yeah, I'll pass." Sure he wanted eternal life but also a 'comfortable' eternal life.
The witch shrugged.
"Oh right, how do I heal?" Izaya asked.
"You will heal normally." She replied.
"I can't grow a head if my head gets chopped off... Or can I?" Izaya raised an eyebrow.
'Your body parts will assemble together." The witch growled. "It will depend on each process."
"Like they would crawl towards me like those zombie movies?" Izaya giggled. Then he thought about it. "Meaning I can have scars and such?"
"Yes."
"...wait… if you say I heal normally…" Izaya squinted. "I am guessing that this eternal life deal doesn't include eternal youth, does it?"
"No." The witch looked mildly amused. And also mildly irritated.
"Oh that can't do. I can't live a thousand years old with all the scars and bruises and look like a mummy, nope. Yeah, I need eternal youth." Izaya shook his head as if he had already decided on the deal. "What's the price?"
"I will take away your most precious memory."
"? Can you be more specific?" Izaya frowned at that.
"I will take away all the memories of Heiwajima Shizuo."
"..." Izaya had three full seconds of silence before he burst out laughing. "Precious memory? SHIZUO?! Are you out of your mind?! Hahahahahahaha!" Izaya laughed as if he had threw down a ganguro girl's pink cellphone and was stomping on it maniacally.
"Alright, you can have it. It's not that much of a memory anyway." Izaya snorted as he wiped tears from the corners of his eyes. "Do you seriously think that's my most precious memory?"
"He consumes your thoughts the most, according to my crystal ball." Her lips twitched to turn into a snide smirk.
This time, it was Izaya's turn to be irritated.
"Well you can have my memory of the damn protozoan, it's completely useless and I'd rather have eternal beauty and youth over that. Dorian Gray be damned." Then Izaya thought about it harder, trying to figure out if there were any loopholes in this odd exchange.
"If I forget Shizuo… does that mean I will never remember him even if I meet him later?"
"You will remember him. Just not before today."
Izaya turned the idea over in his head a few more times. Sure Shizuo would most likely try to kill him on the spot but he was an intuitive guy… he should run the other direction right away. That was if he met him before the rumors reached his ears. Shizuo was notorious for his violence, as an informant he would eventually figure out not to cross paths with him, or he would cross paths with him for fun, which wasn't any different from the now. It sounded fine… what could possibly go wrong?
"Alright, eternal youth for my memory of Shizu-chan. Done. Only his memory though right, you're not tampering with anything else?" Izaya asked, his eyes narrowing shrewdly.
"Just his memory, nothing else."
"Fine, it's a deal."
After a long deliberation that lasted more than half a day, it was just before sunset when Izaya stepped out of the building. She had him drink a bitter potion, but Izaya downed it. After that, it was all over. He didn't feel different, but the fortune teller placed her index finger over her lips and shushed him. "Shh… from now on, you must not speak once you step out of this building."
Izaya considered his options as he started his way back to his suite. He had plenty of ideas how to fight his fate. He had thought of asking the witch what would happen if he had a surgery that would remove his vocal cords but he knew asking her directly would result in her just adding on to the penalty to make it impossible with his immortality. Well, she said he would live forever but could have scars, meaning not everything would heal exactly the same. However, a missing head could reattach… how about a missing finger? Which would lead to, a surgically removed vocal cord… would it grow back?
There was a lot to experiment. First, he should see Shinra…
"IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIZAAAAAAAAAAAAAYAAAAAAAA-KUUUUUUUUUN! I told you NOT to come back to Ikebukuro!"
The booming voice alerted the informant as he sharply turned his head in the direction of the angry man. An angry handsome blond in a bartender suit. Izaya frowned, he was very good at remembering people, it was his job after all. Especially if he did something to anger them but he didn't know who…?!
?!
Izaya gasped out loud as the bartender ripped a vending machine with his bare hands as if he was some superhero in a movie or comic book. The informant's eyes widened as the brooding yet attractive man lifted it all with just one hand. One. Single. Hand!
Izaya was still gasping as he watched the blond throw the vending machine into the air. He stood petrified as if his feet were rooted to the ground, completely mesmerized by the stunt.
"H-hey, IZAYA!"
Izaya barely heard him as the vending machine crashed into his face.
Author's Note: Hello! It's been awhile, sorry I haven't updated Blood Contract, I promise I'll get to it. Meanwhile, have a brand new fanfic! This is a fanfic I had in mind to write back in 2013-2014 or so, but at the time, I was also busy writing Catnip and Blood Contract, I didn't think I could handle 3 big fanfics so I waited until I finished one of them.
With Catnip done, and Blood Contract finally more than half way done, I feel like I can introduce this fanfic now. The fandom is smaller but I hope you will give it a try, thank you so much guys~ Love you for still being around and leaving me reviews :3