I do not own the infernal devices. I just had the idea for the fanfic, not the story. All credit goes to author Cassandra Clare
Tessa sat quietly in the library, a book held tightly in her hands. As she read, her mind raced. What was going to happen next? She couldn't help but smile when she realized she would have to thank Will for letting her borrow his book. Speaking of the devil, Will speaks up then. "I take it you're enjoying the book?"
Tessa can't help but gasp and jump slightly; she hadn't heard Will come in. He'd scared her, and she was already jumpy from the dramatic scene of the book. "Have I scared you?" Will asks with a brilliantly wide smile, he knew completely that he had scared her.
"I just didn't hear you come in," Tessa replied quietly. She placed the small piece of paper she had been using as a book mark into place and closed the book. She set in down on the window seal and picked up her tea cup.
"It's all that Shadowhunter training, my dear. I'm taught to be quite and be able to sneak up on people, you know," Will says, sitting on the ground in front of Tessa.
Tessa smiles down at him, "You could have sat by me."
Will shakes his head and smiles ruefully at the ground, "I don't think it's smart for me to be so close to you, not if I don't have to be."
Tessa looks up in surprise and she's sure the hurt is clear in her eyes. That must be why he refuses to look up at her. "Why?" she asks quietly.
Will laughs a bitter laugh to match his sad smile. "I can't be close to you, Tess."
Tessa places her tea cup back down and turns to the window. Tessa and Will are both quiet and refuse to make eye contact. They look anywhere but at each other. After a moment, Tessa sighs and picks her book back up. She tries to forget that Will was there at all, as he seemed content with pretending she wasn't there either.
As Tessa reads she feels herself get lost in the book all over again. She forgets about Will and Jem and her confusing life for just some time while she gets lost in someone else's story. Tessa reads for what feels like seconds, minutes maybe, but it's probably hours. She easily gets lost in the story, too involve with the characters. But that always happens.
She gasps out loud when her favorite character dies. She wasn't expecting it, at all. He had been one of her all-time favorite characters. She feels herself start to cry and sets the book down again.
"Oh," Will says softly. Tessa had forgotten that he was there while she read. She looked down at him and could tell that he had been amused or happy just a moment before, but now he looked concerned. Tessa looks away from him, letting her tears fall freely. She's only partly aware of Will getting off the floor and sitting down next to her. He wraps his arms around her, pulling her to his chest.
Tessa's heartbeat speeds up just from Will touching her. She tells herself that this is fine. They're not doing anything wrong. Friends hold friends while they cry over the death of fictional characters all the time. "Why did you even recommend that book," Tessa cries softly into Will's chest.
"Did you not like it?" Will replied. He was rubbing soft circles into her back, hoping that would calm her. Tessa makes a sound that sounds like a laugh, but it's hard to tell with her still crying softly.
"Of course I loved it," Tessa replies. "It's just so painful. How did you even read this book? I feel like I just got my heart ripped out of my chest," she goes on. Will is almost too distracted to reply; Tessa's tracing random patterns on Will's chest and upper stomach with her fingertips.
"You shouldn't do that," Will says softly. He wonders if his voice betrayed him, allowing Tessa to hear that she doesn't want her to stop, he actually doesn't want her to stop. But they can't.
"And you probably shouldn't hold me tightly against you like this," Tessa says, her voice just as soft as Will's.
"But I want to. I wish I didn't want to, but I do. This is why I can't be close to you. Hell, I can't even be in the same room as you. The moment I see you I just want to hold you and never let go. I want to hold you and talk for hours. To talk about the books we've read and the poetry we love. Your life in America, all of the crazy things I've seen in London.
"Hell, if you asked, I'd probably tell you anything you want to know, just because I would be talking to you," Will replies.
Tessa remains silent for a moment, letting the words sink in. "It's funny that I feel the same way," she says eventually. Will takes an audible intake of breath.
"Tess," Will says quietly. It's almost like he says her name just to say it. He holds her tighter against him. "I really do love you, I hope you know that. You're the most important thing in my life right now. I would do anything for you. I would die for you, although I'd rather live with you, I would die for you.
"And I want to be with you all the time. I want to hold your hand all the time and hold you when you cry over book characters. But I can't. I can't do that to you, or to Jem, because I love him too. And I'd die for him, as well."
Tessa starts to cry again, just a little bit. "I...I love you, too. And I'd die for you as well. And I love it when you hold me, or just simply touch me. And oh, when you kiss me..." she says, no longer speaking softly. "But Jem... As much as I love you, I couldn't do that to him. And I love him, too. You know I do." It's Tessa's turn to laugh bitterly, "When did my life become so complicated?"
"If you ever need anyone to talk to, I'm here for you," Will says after a moment.
"You want me to talk to you about you?" Tessa asks. "Or talk to you about your best friend?"
Will bites his lip. "I'll be here if you want to talk about it. I can handle it, Tess. For you I could handle it."
Tessa sighs, "As much as I'd like to, I don't think we can hide out in the library together. Someone might get suspicious. I bet people already are, but I don't want them to be. What would Jem think if he walked in on you holding me like this?"
"I think," a third voice replies, "He'd want to know what the hell was going on."
This is my first TID fic and I'd like to know if it's even any good? Opinions are greatly welcome c: Xx