Prologue -
"Some things aren't meant to be spoken, but you gotta say something. Some things aren't meant to be broken, but you gotta break something. Some times you don't wanna try, but you gotta try something. Sometimes you don't wanna feel, don't wanna feel nothing. I'll be waiting for the rest of my life, don't need anyone to save me. Wish I had the words, the words to say. I wish I had the patience to let it go. To let it go."
-
He sat on the cold wooden stool as he forced the liquor down his throat. It burned as it went down, not once touching his tongue. He looked around, his vision in a haze, his body swaying back and forth slowly. He was drunk and didn't care at all.
He could hear a ring in the back of his head. He jolted his muscular, shaking body around towards the door. He saw her as she came in, no smile on her beautiful features. Her hair wasn't pulled back in her usual ponytail, but was drawn down her back and shoulders.
He wanted to touch her. He wanted to hold her. He wanted to make that glint come back in her eyes. He wanted to make that happiness come back and overwhelm her once again. He wanted to love her again. He wanted to make her feel like the luckiest woman in the world.
But he couldn't, and he refused to. Getting up quickly, he walked out of the bar and into the pouring rain.
He tried his best to forget about her.
But as more time passed, the more he felt lonely without her. But he kept his distance as best he could. No matter how much he wanted to hold her or touch her.
He would try to not love her.
-
"I miss you." He says quietly.
"No. You're drunk. And when people are drunk, they tend to say things that aren't true." She answers, not giving him a second glance as she tries to shut the door.
His hand stops it from closing on him once more. He takes a hasty step forward.
"I miss you." He repeats, truth evident in his voice this time.
She slaps away the gentle hand that is coming towards her face, slowly.
"No." she tells him.
She closes the door on him once more, leaving him on her front porch, rain dripping from his nose. Once again, he is left alone in the darkness.
-
The cancer patient, the 5-year-old girl, named Suzy Green, is dying from brain cancer. She only has 1 week to live and Derek Shepherd is sitting by her bed, his chin in his hands, staring at her as she sleeps peacefully.
Why does everyone have to die, he asks himself. Why does he have to be the one to call it, why does he have to be the one to tell the parents, why does he have to be the one to watch the little girl die, and why does he have to feel the guilt?
"It's life." He hears her voice from behind him. She apparently had been reading his mind.
She walks over and stands beside him, no hint of a smile on her face.
"People die. It's just the way of life…" she says simply, like she'd been practicing it.
"I thought we were supposed to enjoy life, not regret it." He tells her, staring straight ahead, not wanting to see the look on her face.
"Some people don't regret it." She says, heading towards the door.
"I do." He says quietly.
She stops and stands for a second, thinking of what he meant by that. She doesn't say a word but walks out of the room silently.
And she can't help but wonder if she's still in love with the man that abandoned her.
The little girl died that day.
-
"Addison and I are divorced." He states.
She doesn't say anything but stares straight ahead.
"I love you."
Still doesn't move.
"I want to hold you."
Doesn't say a word.
His hand comes up to wipe to wipe the hair out of her face.
"No." she says as she backs away from his reach, staring him in the eye.
He drops his hand down in defeat, letting it rest on his knee. He wanted to touch her again. He hadn't touched her in 3 months. He forgot how it felt to touch her. He wanted to be reminded.
"Sorry." He whispers quietly.
"Don't be. You weren't the one that was abandoned." She says.
She gets up and walks out of the bar, tequila in hand.
Again, he feels as though all her misery is his fault.
-
"Forgive me." He says, warm breath against her bare neck.
"I…can't…" she tells him.
"Try." He says, putting a strong hand on her back.
She shivers at his touch. "I don't want to."
"Why not?" he asks, eyes pleading.
"I'm afraid." She says honestly.
"Of what?" he asks, a glint in his eye, wonder in his voice, fear in his heart.
"That you won't hold me when I need you." She says truthfully, as she swallows, trying to hold back the tears.
"I will hold you even when you don't need me." He whispers into her ear, his hand tracing up her back.
"How do I know you're not lying to me?"
"You just have to trust me. Have faith." His palm rested on the back of her neck.
"I trusted you before. You hurt me. I don't know if I can take the chance again."
"Try." He says again.
"I don't want to try anymore."
She walks out of the small closet, a single tear running down her face.
-
She's curled up on her bed, clenching the sheets to her chin, shaking.
There's a soft knock on her door before it's opened.
"Meredith."
She doesn't have to turn around to know who it is. She would know that husky voice anywhere.
"Go a-away. P-please." She tells him.
"I'm sorry." He says, walking closer to the tangled sheets containing a broken body.
She holds the sheets tighter around her, like a small child running away from a monster in the middle of the night.
The bed sinks in as he sits down.
"L-leave."
He doesn't.
Instead, he curls up next to her, his strong arm wrapping around her broken body. "Let me hold you." He whispers against her ear.
She shuts her eyes closed, trying to think of something other than him. Something other than how much he has hurt her. Something other than how much she wants him to be closer.
His hand strokes her hair.
"I want to kiss you." He tells her, warm breath traveling down her spine.
She feels his lips on her neck. She closes her eyes even tighter.
"Why d-don't you just l-leave?" she asks him, wanting to know the truth.
"I promised you I would hold you."
They don't need to say anything more. They already know how fate works.
-
"Forget about it." She says, walking away, the rocks crunching under her feet.
"No." he says, following her down the dark alley.
"Why not?" she pushes.
"I love you." He says, and the words sound so familiar as they roll off his tongue.
"You can't love me." She states, back turned.
"Let me show you how much I love you." He pleads.
"No." she says, walking ahead of him.
And in a matter of seconds, her back is against the brick wall, his hands gripping her wrists.
"Look me in the eye and tell me you don't love me." He says, his lips inches away from hers.
"I love you." She whispers.
Silence.
He leans in, slowly, wanting to feel the touch of her lips once more.
But she pushes him off of her and runs away.
She can't. And will refuse to until he unbreaks her heart.
-
They are in Joe's once more. At the same place they started in.
Their eyes lock as the song from the jukebox fills the room.
"Iris" – Goo Goo Dolls
And
I'd give up forever to touch you
'Cause I know that you feel me
somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I
don't want to go home right now
10
9
Eyes lock. Breath quickens.
And
all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your
life
'Cause sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss
you tonight
8
Heart skips a beat. Both stand up, in sync.
And
I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd
understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you
to know who I am
7
6
Fingers intertwine and hands grip harder.
And
you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth
in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
Yeah you
bleed just to know you're alive
5
Hand caresses her cheek. Head on his shoulder.
And
I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd
understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you
to know who I am
4
Swaying, swaying to the music.
"I want you." He whispers.
And
I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd
understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you
to know who I am
3
Alcohol on his breath. Gripping tighter to her waist.
Her light breathing on his neck.
And
I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd
understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you
to know who I am
2
"I forgive you." She whispers, defeat running through her body.
"Show me." He smiles.
I
just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I
just want you to know who I am
1.
They walk out, hand in hand, knowing for once that they love each other and that no one could ever tear them apart or spoil the love they have for each other. Fate is what brought them together. And fate is why they are still together.
Because
Everybody
Needs
Somebody
-
THE END.
There's always a beginning and an end. Sad, I know.
Review and I'll be happier than before.
Oh and anyone who can guess the song in the prologue will win something. ;-)