Disclaimer: Characters don't belong to me, doy! Damn you Sunrise!

Thanks to my beta AnimeJock!

This is a true story. Except the parts I made up, to make it more interesting. This is the story of Kuga Natsuki's near death experience.
Kuga Natsuki was having a bad day. Mai had busted into her room at 6 AM to make sure she got up for summer-school. Then she realized she'd left her shirt in the wash the night before, and it was still wet; so she still ended up late for class.

At last, class ended and she headed straight for the tree in the garden that Mai and Mikoto, and her, all ate under. As the tree came into view, she sensed something was amiss. There was Mikoto; already shoveling down her meal, and oblivious to anything else, and Mai, taking small bites and enjoying the scene.

But something was not right, Natsuki couldn't put her finger on it, but there was a small bit of fear in Mai's eye.

"H-hey, Natsuki, how was class?" Mai asked pleasantly, a slight stutter in her voice.

"Ugh," Natsuki plopped down on the blanket Mai had laid out, "Class was stupid as usual. Anyway, what's bothering you?"

"N-nothing," Mai blushed slightly, "Uh, I'm sorry about this morning."

Is that what's bothering her?

"Its fine, Mai, don't worry." Natsuki told her, "Where's my lunch?"

"Uh, here it is," Mai reached into her bag and removed a large, unlabeled jar and a spoon.

Natsuki's mouth started watering as she looked at her mayo. She grabbed the jar, unscrewed the cap and plunged the spoon into it.

This will make up for a horrible morning.

She lifted the spoon to her mouth.

Wait, something is wrong…

Natsuki's mouth closed over the spoon, and she froze. Her eyes slowly widened in horror.

A terrifying scream ripped all across the campus.

Mai grabbed an unsuspecting Mikoto from behind and pulled her to safety. Natsuki's eyes were wild and blood-shot. She turned to face Mai.

"What. The. Hell. Is. This?" Her voice was quiet and scary.

"I, uh, well you see, uh, we were, um, out of mayo, and um, I, uh, was at the store, and um,"

"Answer the question."

"It's uh, it's," Mai's eyes were widened in sheer terror. "Ok, don't freak; the store was, sold out of mayo, and, I thought we could try something new, and it's, healthier." Mai had shrunk away from Natsuki's growing rage as she spoke.

"Answer the question!"

"It's…Miracle Whip."

And that's the day Kuga Natsuki died.
Just kidding.

Kuga Natsuki survived her near death experience, and is today, happy with her wife Shizuru. The two are happy and their house never runs out of mayo. Shizuru it turns out; had purchased all mayo in the area, the day before the incident. "I bought it for my love; I never would have guessed this would happen." She was quoted as saying; however, a small sparkle in her eye suggests she planned it all. Then again, who couldn't trust that sweet smile?

Tokiha Mai was hospitalized for several weeks due to trauma. Her life has since returned to normal, though she has never again purchased Miracle Whip.

Minagi Mikoto continued to be oblivious until she got hungry, and Mai was unable to cook for her. She spent the time Mai was in the hospital pestering several people to cook for her. She is back to living off of Mai's food.