Welcome to a story filled with drama (shazam)! Action (Kapow)! And, Chuck. NORRIS!!!
Disclaimer: I don't own any of this. Except the jokes, but you can take the ones you like.
Chuck Norris. Legend. Hero. Texas Ranger. Demi-god?
It's true. Chuck Norris is a half-blood. How could it be otherwise? With his amazing fighting moves, and unshakable moral compass? But, who is his parent?
Part 1:
I got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning. Unfortunately, my bed's against a wall. I fell through said wall into my bathroom, leaving a massive hole behind me. I sighed. Such is the life of Chuck Norris. I picked up my razor,
and some shaving cream. And guess what? I started to shave. That's the second disappointing part of the day. My chin actually shaved the razor. I punched another hole through a wall out of rage. Note to self: Reinforce walls. I
walked towards the kitchen in my apartment, and got out some Wheaties. The breakfast of champions. Yes. I'm a champion, I thought. Champion of Texas. Oh. You didn't believe Walker, Texas Ranger? Well, believe it now! I
hopped onto my horse, and led him into a gallop, headed west. In other words, toward my eighth story window. I screamed my battle cry, "NORRIS!!!" My horse crashed through the window, and started falling towards the ground.
I simply roared, and it showed its true form: A Pegasus! It whinnied, and I continued, still flying west. Realizing I was going the wrong way, I swiftly spun my Pegasus around, heading now northwest. To New York City. The Big
Apple. I'm sure the Pegasus would like that. It would want to eat it. It neighed in agreement. Not that I needed the Pegasus to fly. Just looks cooler. Plus, people don't need to see me flying… They'd think I'm Tom Cruise being an
idiot or something. If I started yelling, "I can fly, I can fly!", and jumped up and down on a couch at least. Today's the day! I'm going to see my god parent today! "FASTER, FREEDOM, FASTER!!!" The Pegasus bucked, forgetting
who its master is. I grabbed its wings, and I started to run on air. It seemed to try to say sorry, so I let it go, letting it go back to my apartment. I am a merciful soul. However, I still kept running. Towards Mount Olympus.
Hope you enjoy the rest of the story. For those of you who are just joining the fun train, we're almost done. Sorry! Should've gotten here sooner! But, you can catch up on all the laughs, and all of the excitement.