My Angel
I remember
the whoosh of invisible wings through the inky night
a piercing blue gaze that saw into my soul,
that saw something to love when I felt only loathing
And your hand
that gripped me tight and raised me from damnation,
that hand that left its brand on my body and soul
I remember
The pale trenchcoat and rumpled suit that were
as much a part of you as your sweet awkwardness
and perpetually puzzled expression
And the carvings on my very bones
that simultaneously hid me from you
and claimed me as your own
I remember
The bright light that marked your descent
from the heavens,
from Grace
And the figure sprawled and broken,
the shadow memory of wings on stone-cold pavement
and the agony of losing the most important part of yourself
I remember
Everything
The ache of betraying everything you had sacrificed for me
The joy of your quiet presence
The times when we did nothing at all
Remembering isn't the problem
It's forgetting