Danvale Continues...
Several Years Later...
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She was giving a seminar when she got the call.
"Claire...we just recieved an emergency call...the EMT's are bringing in your husband, with gunshot wounds to the head. He's been flatlined for the last five minutes."
"I'm on my way down Nancy...thanks."
Heading down to the ER, she knew this was going to be a bad one. Two bullet wounds to the head...chances were very slim for her husbands survival.
"Where's my husband?"
"Trauma one...we have him on a ventilator."
When she walked in she froze on the spot....no..it couldn't be...she had just said good bye to him this morning.
"Jimmy....oh God...how did this happen?"
"I'm not sure, Claire... I wish I knew more. Don was here... then he left again."
"It's not good..I can see that. He's not even alive. There are no signs of brain waves."
"We know Claire. We were waiting for you to give us the okay."
Walking up to her husband, she leaned in and kissed his still warm lips.. as her tears fell.
"Good bye my love... I'm going to put you to rest now. I'm going to give you peace. For I know you have already gone. Don't worry Jimmy...I'll be sure to keep you alive in our babies hearts."
Their babies... they had two five year olds... twins. Full of mischief.
Watching from the door, Mac and Stella waited for Claire to do the hardest part of good bye. Reaching down to turn off the machines, she felt her dads touch on her shoulder.
"It's okay Claire bear... daddy's here."
Trying to be strong, she heard the machines become quiet as Jimmy took his final breath. Turning in her dads arm she quietly sobbed.
"What happened daddy? What went wrong?"
"There was a hostage situation. Don and Jimmy were on the front lines. The kidnapper was shooting victims left and right. When Jimmy seen him aiming for a Don...he jumped in front, and took the hits. That's when Danny, and the others took him down."
She knew that was Jimmy. Always he had to be in the front lines. She knew that before she married him. That was one of things she loved about him. Turning from her fathers arms once more. She grabbed the sheet and carefully covered him.
"Take me home daddy... I need to talk to my babies."
Walking out... Stella wrapped her arm around her daughter with Mac, and headed home. Opening the door she told the sitter she could leave. Finding her boys in the den she called them...
"Jimmy... James..."
"Mommy.... hi mommy."
"Hello... come here, I want to talk to you two."
"Why mommy?"
"It'a about daddy. Mommy needs you to know that he won't be coming home."
"Why mommy... he's working far away?"
"No love... It was daddy's time to go to Heaven, and become an Angel. God needed his help now."
"But if God has daddy... who do we have?"
"Well... you have mommy, papa, nana, Gary, Kelly and all your cousins."
"I don't get it mama. Don't we need a daddy too?"
"Aww darling... it's just going to be us now."
Claire knew how hard it was for them to understand... but she also knew being truthful with them now, would save them heartache in years to come.
"Okay mommy... we go play now?"
"Sure guys... go ahead."
"Claire... why don't you and the kids come home with us for the night?"
"No thanks daddy. We're fine. I have alot to arrange before morning. I love you though... you too mom."
"We love you too sweetheart. If you need anything you call us okay?"
"I will mom. Bye."
Once she walked them to the door and closed it... she collapsed on the ground and cried.
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Gary had just finished up his case, and was headed back in when Danny caught up with him.
"Gary... you need to go see your sister."
"Why... what's going on?"
"Jimmy was killed this afternoon. Your sister had to take him off life support. We tried calling you."
"I was working that Undercover case. I'll head over there now, Danny. Thanks."
Gary couldn't believe it. It was just last night he had beers with Jimmy at the bar. Arriving at his sisters place, he walked in and found her sitting on the couch with the boys sound alseep beside her.
"Hey sis..."
Looking up she seen her brother.
"Hey... what brings you here?"
"Uncle Danny. He told me about Jimmy."
"Yeah... life happens. Then it ends... but don't worry about me bro. Go home to your family."
Gary had never seen his sister act this way. Oh he knew she was very strong like their parents. But never had she sounded this cold. Knowing her temper, he turned around and walked towards the door.
"You know sis... one of these days you are going to push everyone away from you. I'm sorry for your loss. If you decided you need me, call."
Slamming the door on the way out he woke the boys.
"Mommy... what was that?"
"Just the wind Jimmy Jr. Go back to sleep."
Laying her head against the couch she felt the tears hit again. Closing them off... she focused back on the television.
Getting back into his car, Gary called his dad.
"Hello."
"Hey dad.... I just found out about Jimmy. So I stopped by to see Claire, and she chewed my head off. What is wrong with her. She should be upset. Instead she's damn angry."
"I know Gary. She was the same with us. It's her way of dealing son. Your sister has always been like that. Once it all hits her full force she'll break. That's when we'll need to be there."
"I hope so dad. For she's always pushing us away."
"I know son. Whether we like it or not, life has changed her. But I promise you...we will get her back to who she was."
Hanging up the phone Gary headed home to his family.
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When Gary got home, his boys were waiting for him. God he loved the toddler years. They had just turned a year. Funny now he thought back that he and his sister had twins. Both sets.. boys.
Opening the door he seen them cautiously walk towards him.
"Aww... there's daddy's boys. Look at you go son. Come here... that its."
Watching them fall on their bums, he picked them up and hugged them.
"Where's mommy? Where's mommy Kevin?"
Pointing to the kitchen, Gary walked over and kissed his beautiful wife on the lips. Then lowering his head, he kissed her tummy where their third child laid nestled.
"Hi honey.... how was your day?"
"It was alright Janice. I stopped by to see Claire...,she lost her husband today."
"Oh no.... what happened?"
"Jimmy was shot in the line of duty. They rushed him to the Hospital, but couldn't save him. Claire had to take him off the support."
"Aww... I'm sorry. How's she handling it?"
"Same as always... not good. She's pushing everyone away again."
"She'll come around Gary. Try not to worry. Mr. Sheever called today. He needs you to critic a new Chef tomorrow."
"Not again... I swear he goes through Chef's like I go through boxers...everyday."
"I know. But he loves your pallet. Just go... it will give you a break from detective work."
"Yeah... I guess you're right. So what's for dinner?"
"Chicken Cattchatori, scallaps and veggies."
"Mm.. I'm going to get cleaned up. I'll be back down shortly."
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Back at Claire's she had the boys bathed and in bed. Covering them up... she kissed them goodnight, and left the room. Heading back downstairs she heard the knock on the door.
"Hey Claire.... I came to see if you were okay?"
"I'm fine Don... and I'm not up for company. But thanks for stopping by."
Trying to close the door, Don stuck his foot in it.
"Do you mind?"
"Do you Claire? As I see it you have two choices. One... you let me in. Or two... we stand here like this all night."
"God I hate you... why do you always do this to me?"
"Cause I know you squirt. I know you are in pain... I know you push those you love away.... Well not this time... this time we are going to talk. Now let me in."
Backing away from the door, she let him through.
"How about some coffee?"
"How about you make it yourself. I'm going to bed. Don't let the door hit you on your way out. Oh.... and make sure you lock it."
That did it... Don had had enough of her attitude. He knew she needed to let go... and he was damn well going to help her.
Grabbing her arms he shook her.
"Stop this... stop it now, Claire.... you're not going to hurt those around you anymore... understand."
"Let me go.... let go you son of a bitch. I hate you... I hate you... God I hate you.... I hate it... I hate that he died. I hate that he left me alone, Uncle Don... How can I survive. I don't want to. I need him... God I needed him so bad. Pleeeeeease... give him back to me... just bring him back..."
Holding her tight... not letting her go... not allowing her to release... he rocked her tightly in his arms.
As Don continued to rock her, he could feel hear her sobs become silent. Looking down he found her eyes looking into his. Bringing up his hand he caressed it across her hair and whispered....
"Why must you always be so strong Claire? No one is going to think less of you, if you cry in front of them."
Leaning closer into his touch, she allowed him to continue rocking her.
"I don't know... it's just me.... crying is a sign of giving in... or giving up.. I'm just not ready to give in."
"I understand Claire... but you push those of us who love you far away. Leaving us feeling hurt... feeling that you don't trust in us, to help you feel better."
With the silence still filling the home, Don knew it was going to be a long night for him with Claire. Afterall he felt responsible for Jimmy's death... he had taken the bullets meant for him. So he deserved to give this back to Jimmy.... that and the fact he loved his Claire.
Hearing her restful sighs.... he knew she was asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he leaned back against the couch and closed his eyes while still holding her protectively in his arms.
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Back at Mac and Stella's, they were getting ready for bed.
"I think we need discuss our daughter Mac. She's self distructing herself. I'm really worried about those boys. She's made them so strong just like her. I bet you they haven't even shed one tear yet. Or understand that their dad isn't coming home. Where did we go wrong Mac? How does someone come from such a loving, caring home, turn into someone so cold and distant?"
"Sweetheart.... alot of it has to with Jimmy. he always impounded it into her.... you have to be strong Claire... you're a detectives wife... you shouldn't show fear... tears... or pain. It's a weakness. God love... do you know how hard Don and I tried to get her away from him... but did she listen? Instead she gets pregnant, putting her own future on hold for two years. All she ever talked about was becoming a Professor in Forensic... even when she finally got there, did Jimmy lay off her? No... still the same Jimmy..."
"Shh... come on Mac... don't go upsetting yourself again. I know how hard it was for you to have your little girl defy you... I know what kind of pain you felt in your heart... for I felt it too. All we can do is continue to be there for her and hopefully one day she'll become our little girl again."
Leaning in behind her husband she massaged his shoulders.
"Look at you Mac... you're all tense and tight...please try and relax...it's not at all good for you to be upsetting yourself."
Turning to face his lovely wife, he brought up his hand and caressed her face...."I know love...leaning in he passionately kissed her, as his fingers curled into her thick beautiful hair. So hot, as the sensual sighs and purrs could be heard from her heart, drivng Mac to plunge deeper into her mouth, stroking, dueling their tongues wildly.
Carefully laying her down, he slid her gown from her body, using fingertip caresses as she softly sobbed out his name..."Maaaaaaac...." Becoming out of control now, they both took from each other in frenzied passion, until all that remained were the cries of their love throughout their room.
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Later that night Don woke to a chill. Opening his eyes, he found Claire gone. Heading upstairs to make sure she was okay, he couldn't find her. Checking the boys room, she wasn't there either.
Walking back downstairs, he seen her coming through the front door.
"Claire...where have you been?"
"I just needed to a walk. I'm fine Don, don't worry about me."
"I'll always worry. It's my job, especially when you go off in the middle of the night without a thought to the boys."
"Oh stop being so self rightious. I knew you were here. That's why I went."
"So the attitude is back? Even after our chat?"
"No...I'm tired. You should head home. I'll see you tomorrow."
God he wanted to spank her. She needed it. her attitude and anger was beyond irrational.
"I don't know Claire, at times I swear...."
"What? What Uncle Don? Just go."
Knowing there was no way to reason with her again, he gave her her way, and left.
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Shutting the door behind him, he called Gary. He knew the two of them were going to have to join together and attack Claire full force. He couldn't ask Mac...especially with his doctors orders that another raise in his blood pressure, could cause a massive stroke this time, and it would be a frozen day in hell, before he'd let Claire do that to her father.
God over the years so much had changed. Especially with Mac's health. Never did any of them suspect he was a canditate for HBP. Then when he suffered his first mild stroke, caused by a small clot in his brain, it changed all their lives forever.
"Hello..."
"Gary...it's Uncle Don, we need to talk."
"Sure...come on over. I'll put on the coffee."
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When Don arrived, Jancie let him in.
"Hi Don...how you doing? Come on in."
"Thanks Janice. Look at you..your just starting to show."
"I know. It seems like only yesterday I was carrying the twins."
"Hey Uncle Don.... how is she?"
"How'd you know I was there?"
"That's easy Uncle Don....she was always your baby girl. Have a seat."
"She's not good. We talked for a while, she cried for a few minutes, fell asleep. Then when I woke up she was gone. I searched the house for her, then she comes walking in the door. BOOM...her attitude changed."
"Great, at least she talked to you, she booted me out."
"She tried...I stuck my foot in the door. Told her either she let me in, or we stand here all night. She opted for the second."
"I think the first thing we need to do, is remove the boys from the home for the day. Then we will attack her from both sides. She can't fight us both. I'm sure between the two of us, we can get her to release her hate and anger. Cause I'll be damned if I'll put our father through her tempers again."
Nodding that he understood. Don drank his coffee, while Gary called Danny to pick up the boys in the morning.
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When the daylight shone through the window, Claire felt her boys jump up on her bed with the dogs.
"Morning mommy...we are hungry. Can we have beakfast?"
"Ooooh..okay JimmyJr give mom a minute."
Getting out of the bed, she could feel her headache begin as she whispered....
"Another day of hell Claire...get your ass up."
Once she was showered and dressed..she heard the door.
"Jimmy Jr get the door please."
"K mommy. Uncle Danny, cool, what are you doing here?"
"I came to take you guys out for the day. I thought maybe the Zoo...to see the monkeys."
"Cooooooool....James, Uncle Danny is going to take us to the Zoo."
Coming down the stairs Clare sighed.
"Great...what is this? Round three?"
"Ouch...such attitude. I'm not here for you. I'm here for your kids. I'm taking them out for the day."
"You're taking them? Don't you think you should ask?"
Seeing the boys watching Danny said....hey guys...run upstairs and grab your jackets. Once they were out of the room Danny laid into her. Gripping her arms he pinned her to the wall with mild force and hissed...
"You listen to me young lady. You can pull all the God damn attitude you want...you can have all the tempers you want...but no matter how much you throw at me...your brother...or your Uncle Don...we will still love you. Understand Claire...there's no escape."
"Okay Uncle Danny, we are ready."
"Alright then, let's go boys. Bye Claire."
Slamming the door Danny left his niece to her tears.
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As Mac dressed for the day, he thought about going to visit his daughter.
"Sweetheart....I'm going to see Claire today. I'd like to know how she's doing."
"Umm, not today Mac. Danny is coming with Jimmy and James. They are taking you to the Zoo."
"The Zoo...but I wanted to see my daughter?"
"You can see her later. For now your nephews, need to see their papa."
Hearing the knock on the door, Stella let them in. As the boys ran passed their nana, into their papa's room.
"Papa....we missed you. Are you coming to the Zoo?"
Laughing at their excitement, how could he say no.
"I am, just let papa have a quick drink of juice, and we'll go."
"K papa, but hurry."
Running back out, nana had cookies on the table.
"Thank you, nana."
"You are welcome my boys. Danny...how is she?"
"Not good. Her attitude is really bad. We need to keep Mac away from her, until Don and Gary get through to her."
"What if they don't?"
"Man...you know what Stel, if they can't, then I don't know who can."
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At the Zoo, the boys held their papa and Uncle's hands.
"Look papa...see the Lions? We are doing a project on them at school."
"You are? Wow that's exciting, isn't it?"
"It is...you know what else papa?"
"What James?"
"Mommy said daddy isn't coming home. That he's an Angel. Howcome he had to become one?"
"Well son. It was your daddy's time to go. When we all pass on, It's our belief, that we go to Heaven to become Angels. This way, we help someone on earth who needs an extra step in the right choices they make. Or they need extra help to get through hard, or saddened times."
"But whose going to help us now papa? If daddy's in heaven...who's going to watch over us?"
Mac was becoming tired. For the last couple days he hadn't been feeling all that well.
"Well James, each one of us are asigned our own Angel. This special Angel watches over us."
"I don't get it papa, then why wasn't there an Angel watching daddy?
"Mac...you okay? You look pale."
"I'm fine Danny. Just a little tired today."
"Answer me papa, how come no one watched over daddy?"
"Hey...listen guys....why don't we go grab some hotdogs. How would that be?"
"Yeah, hotdogs, cool."
"Why don't you stay here Mac. I'll be right back."
Danny was concerned. Mac was aweful pale. Flipping up his phone he called Stella.
"Hello."
"Hey Stel...it's Danny. I think something may be wrong with Mac. He's very tired and pale. I think it might be a good idea to pick him up."
"Okay Danny, I'll be right there. Can you keep the boys with you?"
"Of course. I'll take them over to my place. We'll play some video games."
"Thanks Danny. I'm on my way."
Grabbing up all Mac's med's. She headed out to pick him up, and take him to the Hospital.
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Over at Claire's, she was cleaning out Jimmy's things when the doorbell rang.
"God damn it...who is it?"
"It's us Claire...let us in."
"For Christ sakes, what now?"
Opening the door, she seen her brother, and Uncle.
"Ahh...come on you two. Not again today. Is this why Danny took my boys? So that we could have another screwed up chat...where I end up kicking you out, maybe this time for good. Maybe disowing you both? Oh hell let's go all the way, I'll disown you all."
Turning to walk away from them, she heard the click of the lock. Shutting her eyes, she knew there would now be no place to run from her pain.
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When Stella arrived at the Hospital with Mac. They took his information, and blood pressure.
"Okay ...we need to get you into a room. Follow me."
Peeking over at the BP machine, Stella seen it read 220/120. Catching up with them, she knew Mac was sliding back down to where he was two years ago.
"I need you to get undressed, and slip into the gown. Then I'm going to hook you up to a monitor."
Once the Nurse had Mac settled, she started an IV of Saline Solution. Then adding his dose of medication, she left the room to contact his doctor.
"Stttel...Iii'm fffine..."
Trying to stay strong, as he began slurring his words she caressed his hair.
"I know Mac...they just need to sure. Then we can go home."
"C..laire."
"Okay...we can go see Claire. Just try and rest Mac."
"Hello Mac, how you feeling?"
"Fffine."
"That's good. I'd like to send you for a quick CT scan. We just want to make sure everything is fine. Can you tell me when you started feeling tired again?"
Trying to say something, they could see his mouth curve downwards as the saliva came slowly from the left side of his mouth.
"It's okay Mac. Try not to talk. Just rest. I'm going to put an airmask on you to help you breathe. If you feel yourself not being able to feel relief let me know okay?"
While they took Mac down for the scan, Stella waited patiently for his return.
"Excuse me . Your husband is on his way to room 403, the Cardi...."
"I know where that is, thank you."
Heading upstairs, she entered Mac's room and found him half in and half out of conciousness.
"Okay ...I have some Intravenous Thrombolytics to administer to your husband. He has suffered another stroke. This one is ischemic like before, but we caught it in time."
"Thank God. He's going to be okay though...right?"
"We hope so...if he starts to improve over the next fourty-eight hours, we will start him back on low doses of Asprine. Then we will discuss changing his medication."
"Okay...thank you for everything."
"You're welcome . Try not to worry to much. Your husband is very strong."
Stella knew the doctor was trying to reassure her. Problem was....it wasn't working. Leaving the room, Stella called Danny and informed him of Mac's situation.
"Okay Stel...I'll get in touch with Don, and let him know. Try and relax, Stella."
"Thanks Danny. I'll talk to you soon."
Walking back into the room Stella sat down beside Mac's bed and took his hand. Feeling his gentle squeeze she let her tears flow.
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Back at Claires home Don yelled...
"Sit...now young lady and don't God damn move."
Hearing his cell vibrate. He flipped the top.
"Flack."
"Donnie...it's Danny. I just heard from Stella, it seems Mac suffered another stroke. They have him in Cardiac Unit again."
"Okay...thanks Danno, how are the boys?"
"They're fine. I have them at my place. I'll give you a call when I hear more."
Flipping down the phone, Gary knew right away.
"Aww, come on, how bad Uncle Don?"
"Another mild one. But they caught it in time. He's back in the Cardiac Unit."
"Who....dad? What's going on? Talk to me...he's my dad too."
"Is he Claire? Cause I could have swore, not more then five minutes ago, you disowned us all."
Gary hated hurting his sister like this. But what could he do. They needed her to break...they needed her to feel again. God if Jimmy wasn't already dead...Gary would have killed him himself. He had damaged his sister inside and out. Tearing her away from her family..her values...and the love, she had been brought up with.
"No I didn't....this is mean...really mean. What is wrong with daddy?"
"What is wrong with you Claire? You sit all high and mighty, pushing all those away who truely love you. And for what? For what? That bastard husband of yours, who hated the ground us Taylor's walked upon. Always telling you, that as long as you live under his roof...you will obey his rules. Rules which tore our family apart. Rules that broke daddy's heart...cause he lost his little girl"
"That's...not..fair Gary. he didn't mean those things, he said...he just didn't understand love, till I taught him what it was."
"Taught him...taught him what? He was a cold hearted bastard, with the blackest soul. I can honestly tell you Claire...I'm glad he's dead...I'm glad he's gone.."
Don could see her fists clench...he could see the Taylor glare of anger appear in her now sad eyes. Then without warning, she attacked her brother full force...punching...kicking...screaming...as he and Don held her down. God she was strong, as the hate began pouring out of her. They could feel each kick, each punch that she managed to get in.
Then they heard the scream....the hurtful, truthful scream of pain, agony, and loss.
"Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaddy.....daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaddy ...." she cried.
feeling her arms grip his neck, he felt her warm tears pour down it.
"Shh....that's it sis. Let it all out. Sh...come on Claire...just let it flow. I'm right here with you. Uncle Don, and I are right here...we got you Claire."
Pulling her up into their arms, they sandwiched her between them. Comforting her, kissing her, helping her return to the little girl she was supposed to be.
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Over at Uncle Danny's, the boys were testing his patients.
"Alright...now I know to thank God, for not giving me rugrats."
"What did you say Uncle Danny? What's a rugrat?"
"That's what you two are....little rats that get under my feet."
"You're funny, Uncle Danny...can we play pool again?"
"Are you insane? You already scratched the green. No way bud. Now eat...then we'll get you home."
"Aww...why? We love it here Uncle Danny....don't you love us?"
Looking at their little faces. Danny thanked God that they had Claire's looks, and not their fathers. God... it made him wonder why these boys weren't screwed up. Must have been a blessing that Jimmy worked alot. For it left him little time to brainwash the boys..like he had Claire.
"Of course I love ya's...now eat."
Watching the boys eat, Danny wondered how the hell Don, and Gary, were doing with Claire.
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Back at Claire's...
When her cries became quiet, they heard in the barest of whispers...
"Gar....I want to see daddy. I need to tell him I'm sorry. Please Gar...I want daddy."
Gary looked at Don, Don shook his head no.
"I'll tell you what sis...I'll take you to see Dad tomorrow. Right now we need to get you cleaned up, before J&J get home."
"I want to go now Gary...please...I've hurt daddy so much...I need to tell him..I need to tell him how much I love him. He needs to know."
"Claire it's just not a good idea right now. Dad suffered another stroke this afternoon. He's back in the Hospital. If he sees you...he could become aggitated...causing another one."
"So you're telling me it's my fault daddy had a stroke...that I caused them?"
"No Claire...you didn't cause them. I just meant that dad hasn't seen you in months. Jimmy made it quite clear to dad, that he was to stay away from your home, and your boys. Dad listened to him, only because mom told him by fighting with Jimmy, it could cause him to relapse."
"So daddy never hated me...daddy didn't say, he never wanted to see me again, or my boys?"
"No Claire...why would he? Dad loves you so much, you have no idea how hard it was for mom to keep him relaxed. Why would you think he hated you?"
"When Jimmy came home that day...he said he talked with daddy. He said daddy told him, that he had disowned the boys, and I. That we weren't worth wasting his breath on, anymore."
"Claire...why didn't you ever tell us that? Why didn't you ever talk to us about it?"
"Cause I figured if daddy disowned me...you all did too. Not one of you came to see me or the boys when Jimmy was alive. What was I supposed to think?"
"Claire...you were the one that told us all to stay away. In fact you screamed it loud enough, for all of New York to hear."
"So that's what Uncle Danny meant this morning when he said...there was no escape. He meant that no matter what was said...you all never gave up on me."
"That's right Claire...we never stopped loving you or the boys. We just gave you what you asked for. For that's what family who really love you do. They let you go...but never by the heart. The heart always remains."
Turning her head towards her Uncle Don....the Uncle who had been her second father all through her tiny years, she whispered....
"I'm so sorry Uncle Donnie, I love you. I love you so much...please don't hate me."
With tears streaming down their cheeks. He wrapped his Claire tightly in his arms.
"Never Claire....never could I hate you....you are my little girl."
Sighing deep...Don and Gary knew that their Claire had returned home to them. They knew that over the weeks, she would now heal...returning to the little Claire bear her daddy loved.
tbc...