Title: A Tale of Three Traitors
Story Author: Clara Brown
Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN BLEACH!! If I did it would be Sake for the under-aged melting fan girl _•
Story warnings: most likely OOC Aizen, Attempted Sakura-Maruchi-Guardian usage and a fail no plot story with dramatic outbursts pranks and stupid boys getting what they deserve.
Rating: If you're older than 128 and reading this stuff get a life.

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BEGINS IN GIN'S POV

A couple months before the initial betrayal of Sereteii there was...nothing going on. IT WAS BORING! Nothing out of the ordinary ever seemed to happen, well at least not at first glance.
Aizen Sousuke was the Taichou of 5th division. At first glance he is a kind, loving, supportive role model for all Shinigami. At second glance, well he's still all that, but if you stick with it and magnify it to the 50th or 60th check you will find a cold, callus and ambitious man. The kind of man who is working solely for himself and loves to manipulate people like puppets and cut the supporting strings when their usability runs dry. He would have been the ultimate bad guy, well that is if it weren't for Yoshiro Sakura, his would-be niece, his Achilles (lol) heel.

Yoshiro Sakura is...what you always asked for in a girl and well, a little more than you bargained for. She's pretty and smart, but if you as me a little too punch-happy. Believe me I'd know. Nah I'm kidding I like her, no way I could handle an intimate relationship with her but she's got a good heart.

Now that you know these people's types, I can continue with what I was saying, Sereteii was a pretty dull place, until she..."came back".

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX SWITCHING TO OMNISCIENT POV XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"It were a pleasan' day in fifth 'til a certain bored Cap'n decided ta ditch 'is 'ittle blonde follower"

Aizen sighed and looked up at the third squad captain.
"What do you want Gin?"
"I dun wan' nutin'" This lie earned him an icy glare.
"Somehow I don't believe you."
"Ok ya caught me, I wan' excused from tomorrows meetin' "
"No." Came the cold, decisive response.
"Bu'!"
"No."
The silver captains smile vanished as he disappeared out the door. Aizen sighed his chosen second was very picky and Aizen would have no cooperation at tomorrows meeting. Now that he had a chance he decided to relax and appreciate the rare silence. SLAM! The door was thrown open and the previously pouting leader of third ran in.
"Gin I said no stop, acting like a brat"
"WAIT...That's mean...I jus' thought maybe ya would want ta see this..."
Aizen's eyes went wide as he saw a figure slip in.
"Miss me?"
"Nah Aizen's a-sexual even ask Ran, she agrees!"
This earned him a strange look from the figure.
"Though I agree TMI dude."

The girl tossed her head back with unrelenting laughter. "You people are so oblivious! Nobody even bothers to ask before now?" She gushed, attempting to catch her breath after her laughing fit. This was quite a new experience for her. Laughing with people was one things, but laughing at people? She hadn't gotten such a joyful opportunity in years!

Completely proving her point Gin turned to Aizen,"... Wut does oblivious mean?"

Aizen embarrassed at his second's lack of knowledge hid his face in his hands. Such a stupid question he wouldn't even bother justifying it with an answer.

She couldn't help but laugh again. "Really, now? And this society killed me?! That's sure a blow to my self-esteem." Aizen freed his face only to glare at her. It blew over like rain on a slanted tarp. "Although, I'm feeling nice today. Would you like me to introduce myself in all my rebellious, unchained glory?"

Gin perked up at this, "Yes! Though seems ta me ya'd have a tough time tryin' ta chain up sometin' ya can' see or touch"

Gin, please do us a favor, take that ridiculous grin of your face and learn the perks of silence." Aizen said calmly though clearly annoyed.

"Wutever...wonder what Ran would say if I told 'er about my encounter 'bout some hot dead girl", Gin replied smiling more clearly ignoring his bosses demands.

Twitch. Twitch. TWITCH. "One. I am NOT dead. Two, if you call me I will rip out your eyes, and-" The girl flung herself into a vivid explanation of exactly how she was going to murder Gin. This caused the whole room to stare in horror. "...Eh-hem. Well. My name! Yes, my name! Where did the time go? ~ My name is Yoshiro Sakura."

Gin opened his eyes very shocked. He was so shaken up he forgot his accent. He began to stutter a bit,"Y-Yosh-shiro Sakura? Isn't th-that a boys n-name? Wait! YOUR A CROSSDRESSER?!"

Aizen shook his head. Gin was so gonna get it.

Yoshiro "Yoshie" Sakura, the epitome of the female kind, was not amused. Yet, all she could seem to get out of her mouth was "...WHAT." Her tongue and her brain finally got a plan together and she clenched her fists. "I AM LESS OF ONE THAN YOU ARE, YOU BRAINLESS, FOX-FACED, SCUM-LOVING FREAK!!" Yoshie screamed, restraining herself from killing him, because that'd be awkward, in a way. Aizen face palmed. "Calm your temper, child. You can kill him outside."

"Can I say sometin'''?"

"Speak your mind, idiotic wannabe furry." Yoshie sighed, folding her arms in a surprisingly intimidating fashion.

Smiling very big the "furry" said," Good ya know I would 'a said it anyways but, ya never answered whether yew were a cross dresser or not.... So.... Are ya? Cuz if so,", Gin gave a thumbs up," Great costume. Izuru and Yumichika would be jealous!"

Yoshiro glared at him. No, not just a glare, it was like the great-grandmother of all glares, the sort of glare that could burn a hole through your head. "I am female. FEMALE. A GIRL. And I know you'd love it if I started pulling off clothing to prove it, but it's not happening." She hissed. Angry Yoshie was angry.

Gin flirted with disaster, or Yoshie, or both. Doesn't matter they were pretty much one and the same,"Aww.... even if I got down on my hands and knees and begged? ~~~"

There it was: her infamous smirk. Quick, everyone, take a picture! "If you get down on your hands and knees, I'd be glad..." she drew a sword, letting the light dance dramatically across its blade. "...To take this and behead you in but a moment. I'm just so tired of being the peacemaker, you know? ~"

Gin was smart. Or rather he could be smart. However he just couldn't resist," Hot insane female serial killers are very irresistible."

Yoshie was fifteen, and had learned quite a few things about social skills. She had applied only one thing: violence speaks louder than words. "Take this, you hateful bastard." She muttered, swinging her fist and connecting it sharply with his jaw. Aizen resisted the urge to smile; he had been put through the same thing too many times to count.

Gin stared. He had been hit many times, but only by Aizen and Soi Fon.... never by a girl. Wait a thoughtful look spread across his face, Queen Bee is a girl...he found out watching a very...delightful catfight that he had created. A creepy smile grew on top of his smile.

Yoshie smiled back. "Glad to be of service, Missssster Ichimaru." She purred. This would be an entertaining mind game, in the least, entertaining, and very much...amusing, Almost as much so as her former friend (ah, how she missed him!).

Gin opened his mouth as if to reply when one Izuru walked into the fifths building. "Taichou! Do not run I need your signature"

Gin stared at the heavy thick stack of paper and pouted, "I 'ave a newly discovered phobia of...paper work. Can' ya jus forge it like ya do usually?"

"I could forge his signature, you know." The Sakura replied thoughtfully. "It's something I'm actually pretty good at, down to chemical composition of the ink." This earned her another stare from the room's inhabitants. "English, for the rest of them." Aizen sighed. Yoshie gave a quick nod. "Okay, then...ME WRITE SIGNATURES GOOD."

"Ya sound like Ran when she's drunk..." gin thought about this for a while the look over," Are ya drunk?...Aizen is!"
Confused Izuru stared at this strange bunch of people 'I wonder if they should be allowed to wander the streets...wait Aizen.... drunk?' He thought about vocalizing this thought looked around and saw the insane group and hastily changed his mind.

You could practically see the cogs whirring around inside Yoshie's head. "Drunk...I drank water earlier...don't think that counts..." She murmured, thinking hard about such things. A complete lack of social skills was indeed the cost of a brilliant mind. "Yoshiro, you are not drunk and neither am I. Now sit down and stop making everyone act like idiots." Aizen barked as Yoshie took a step back.

Izuru groaned," With Taichou there's no need to act." Then he realized his taichou had escaped...again.

SLAM! Aizen's poor abused door was thrown open. Before anyone had time to register this, one 10th division Fukutaichou stormed in, one very drunk Fukutaichou.

"WHERE THE HELL IS THAT SORRY GOOD-FOR-NOTHING LAZY SEXY HORRID CREEPY SICK DELUSIONAL FREAK OF A FOX?!"

"Who?" asked a somewhat naive Izuru.

"Now listen up! I have to deal with a drunken midget thanks to that...that man*HICCUP*. AND YOU ARE SOOOO WRONG IF YOU THINK IM GOING TO GO THROUGH THAT ON MY OWN! *HICCUP* CONGRATS YOUR ALL DRAFTED INTO MIDGET DUTY!!!!!!"

"Sorry...but I have to find Taichou and get his signature."

"YOUR TAICHOU IS THE PROBLEM!!!"

Izuru was confused by this comment,"Taichou isn't any of those things!" This earned him a bunch of raised eyebrows.

"I mean...he is lazy and a good for nothing.... but where did you get the 'creepy, sick, delusional, freak of a fox.' He's not a fox at all..."'though...that would explain a lot' he added to himself.

Yoshie slid into a corner, trying her best to hide from the terrors that were Rangiku and Gin. "Did I come at a bad time?" She whispered from her beloved corner.

Rangiku's rage shifted towards the last speaker, "DAMNSTRAIGHT!!!!"
"OWW!!" one Ichimaru Gin walks in half of face bright red and an arrow through his hand.

Yoshie stared, chuckling ever so slightly. "Who shot you, hm? I've been meaning to reconnect with a certain old friend." She said, finally letting loose a bit of suppressed laughter. Yoshiro did miss her old school friend, yes, but she was a tad bit...nervous to actually face down her former partner-in-crime.

"I-I dun have any clue what yer talkin' about but.... Is it like take out yer stupid girly and dwarfish anger on Gin day?! I DIDN DO ANYTHIN! AND your cap'n tries to assassinate me!!! And ten some chick walks up and decides somethin' in gibberish and whaks me and shoots me!!".... He added under his breath, "Not my fault I have wanderin' eyes."

Izuru added,"Taichou has.... eyes?"

There was an awkward silence as everyone realized they had no clue what the topic of conversation was. Then the door was open, gently this time but it was already so abused it broke in the guests hands.
"Oh the door seems to have broke..." a smug smile surfaced," Well it certainly won't mind if I use it as a improvised weapon～"
The door was hurled at an unsuspecting squint-eyed captain. While he was still in shock she took the opportunity to sink her teeth into his already punctured hand.

Authors Note: Clara: My first fic PLEASE be nice....Anyways we will continue if you want please review~
Yoshie: Not my first fic, but I hate my own creations. Review or I break into your house and choke you with a steel guitar string.