The chapter where Cristina reflects on Owen in bed
Cristina laid in bed opposite Owen, her head by his feet. She watched his chest rise and fall. A fan across the room blew directly onto the bed; they were uncomfortably warm in the Seattle summer. Cristina was in her usual tank top and underwear, Owen was bare chested in a pair of worn boxer shorts. His head was turned to the left, away from Cristina's direction and his shorts were creeping up his legs due to the squirming, trying to get comfortable in the heat. Her eyes fell to his right thigh, the scar from when he stapled his own leg shut, their first encounter. She remembered how she was assigned to help the Major and instead he ended up helping her. Her fingers found her own scar from the icicle, her icicle that he pulled out and then he stitched her up. The Owen from the before who had kissed her so hard she felt his lips on hers for days, was tough and arrogant and a bit of a sexy Mcbadass. That Owen had been replaced with a calmer more focused and thoughtful Mcbadass, he was still level headed and quick on his feet but now he was eager to focus and learn rather than be an arrogant hot shot. She still loved him, there was a bit of that old Owen hiding and she could see it underneath all the insecure, scared in his own skin Owen bits he tried to hide from the world. He was getting stronger and they were getting closer now that a new obstacle was upon them.
Owen shifted on the bed and Cristina drew her eyes to the three ports near his collar bone, his central line for the chemo. It happened to be in her favorite place on his chest, where she would rest her head in the evening while they sat together. He had decided that he wanted it directly after he knew he was going to need chemo. Cristina knew it was the right decision, but she was still a little bitter about losing her favorite cuddle spot to a piece of plastic. Their fingers were laced together as they left the Oncologist's office, "I want a central line" he said very matter of factly. She couldn't argue, it was a good idea and the earlier he got it the safer the rest of his veins would be. "I know it will be in your favorite place" he added. "It's the right decision." Cristina responded, she didn't want him to feel guilty about getting cancer, no one asks for cancer. "I'll just have to find a temporary new spot." She gave his hand a squeeze.
She remembered his speech when he told her that he was sick. "Throughout all of this, remember that I'm still Owen. I may be sick, or bald, or too weak to lift my own head, but I'm still your Owen. So you can get mad at me, and tell me about your bad days. I'll still be a person and I'm not going anywhere. I said 40 years and I meant it." She was upset at first because he had already rallied a team of Callie and Arizona to do all the appointments and had told Derek about the leave of absence, but she knew he was a planner, he always was. You don't get to be a Major in the army without being able to plan, take action, and rally the troops. He wanted Cristina to be his rock, "I know how hard it must have been to plan and keep Izzie's schedule, even though we were on the outs, I know it was hard on you on top of the rest of your life, and I don't want you to have to do that with me. I don't want to become a chore or a hassle. So Callie and Arizona are going to help me keep my appointments and my schedule straight, and you just have to go to work and be with me. I know it won't be easy, but it will be easier if you're around. I can't fight this one alone."
She felt a tear rolling down her cheek and quickly wiped it away, sniffing quietly to avoid waking Owen. She knew he didn't ask for this, that he was still himself despite being destroyed on the inside, but she couldn't help but feel sad and scared. She finally had who she was looking for and he was sick, he might even leave her and the idea of existing without him now seemed so impossible it hurt. He must have heard her anyway because soon after that he rolled over again to face her, awake.
"Couldn't sleep?" he asked. She took in his face, how his eyes lit up and he became more him than he ever was with his ginger hair and stubble. The cancer had taken his hair too, Cristina missed it a bit, it made him easier to spot in the hospital and was one thing he had that was similar in the before and the after, but his bald head was pretty easy to spot too.
"Yeah, it's just so hot with all this curly hair." she said with a smirk. She crawled towards him. "Move over." she commanded. He shifted closer to her side of the bed, so she could nestle on his right shoulder, since his left was occupied. "It's not the same." she remarked as she placed her head on him.
"I know." he kissed the top of her head. "You're right," he mentioned looking down into her eyes, "this hair really does get in the way." he chuckled. "Maybe you should cut it all off too."
She looked up at him, "Seriously? A bald surgeon doesn't look very confident, plus you happen to love my curls."
"So?" Owen returned with a smirk. "I love you more."