Disclaimer: If I were the owner of any of this, do you think I'd be writing fan fiction?
Summary: Companion piece to '2 Single Parents'. A series of episodes featuring Darla (with a little help from Spike) on their road to redemption, since she gives birth to Connor till she has to face her new role as a mother.
Notes: Although this is a companion piece to my fic, 'Two Single Parents', it's not necessary to read it.
Ain't so far down
Episode 1:
Well I just heard the news today
It seems my life is going to change
I closed my eyes, begin to pray
Then tears of joy stream down my face
With arms wide open
Under the sunlight
Welcome to this place
I'll show you everything
With arms wide open
Well I don't know if I'm ready
To be the man I have to be
I'll take a breath, take her by my side
We stand in awe, we've created life
With arms wide open
Under the sunlight
Welcome to this place
I'll show you everything
With arms wide open
Now everything has changed
I'll show you love
I'll show you everything
With arms wide open
If I had just one wish
Only one demand
I hope he's not like me
I hope he understands
That he can take this life
And hold it by the hand
And he can greet the world
With arms wide open
'With Arms Wide Open, by Creed-
Rain was falling from the dark sky. It had been raining for long now, but it would have to rain a lot more to clean all the putrefaction and malice of the City of Angels' streets. And perhaps it would never be enough.
However, between the obscure and sinister alleys, between the sky-scrapers and the shinning lights, in the least thinkable place of all, there was a sanctuary. A sanctuary where a miracle was going to take place.
Or not.
Anguished cries of pain filled the place, so terrible that made the crystals tremble dangerously. There were somber looks on every face, but they tried their best to avert each other's eyes, afraid they'd tell too much.
'She ain't gonna make it. Or the baby.'
A heavy silent fell upon them, only broken by the crying upstairs. No one dared to contradict Gunn – no one but Cordelia.
'She'd make it. And the baby too. I've seen it, remember?'
However, her voice sounded far from confident. As the hours extended endlessly, her faith in the Powers or whoever who was controlling this (if there was someone controlling this at all) was fading. The child should have already been born, but the mysterious force that had protected him until now seemed to have forgotten him. Which wasn't entirely true. If he had been forgotten, at least they would have been able to practice a cesarian but every time Wesley had tried to approach Darla with a knife he had been sent flying backwards. Cordelia sighed. How were they supposed to deliver this boy into the world of the living without a bit of help?
Angel was taking her hand tightly, as any other normal father would have done with his wife during a normal birth. But this wasn't a normal birth. Hell, it couldn't even be called a birth.
Darla let out another cry of pain. She had suffered many kinds of pain during the four centuries she had walked among living and dead, but none resembled this one. It was like her body, mind and heart were tearing apart. And it felt so…wrong. Of course she didn't know what giving to birth felt like, but certainly it wasn't like this. She wasn't giving birth to her son. She was killing him.
On the opposite side of the room, Wesley searched frantically in his books for an answer, an answer that insisted to escape from him. No matter how many times he read the words and passed the pages, he just wouldn't find what he was looking for. Which wasn't surprising, as he wasn't sure what he was looking for in the first place. Who had heard about a vampire giving to birth, for heaven's sake? And however, it was happening. Or it should have been happening.
Darla shut her eyes closed. She didn't want to see anything. She didn't want to see the blood red walls that were trapping her, she didn't want to see Wesley becoming more and more desperate, and she didn't want to see Angel's soulful, desolated eyes. She didn't want to see what was happening to her, what was happening to her baby.
Her baby. It was the first time she thought of that life growing inside her like that. But it was her baby, her little boy. And she couldn't do a thing to save him.
How ironic. She had slaughtered thousands over the years with a song in her heart, and now she couldn't bear the loss of one single, insignificant life. A life that now meant everything to her, and it was slipping through her fingers nevertheless.
She felt the tears burning all the way down her face… She couldn't remember when it had been the last time she had cried.
'Shh, shh. Darla, don't cry. Everything's going to be alright', she heard Angel whispering in her ear but his voice sounded as if he were miles away. And maybe he was.
'You were a better liar when you hadn't a soul.'
Another pang of pain, more terrible than the others if possible. She bit her lips to not cry out again. God, the pain was so terrible, so unbearable… But all the pain in the world seemed nothing in comparison to the idea her child wouldn't live. That was the worst punishment fate could have given her.
Maybe it's just that. A punishment for all the atrocities Angel and I did together.
She blinked in an attempt to sweep the tears away from her eyes. It was then when she saw it, so clearly that almost hurt her sight.
'Angel, this child is the one good thing we ever did together. You make sure to tell him that.'
And with no further talking, with any further explanation, she took the wooden stake from his coat's pocket and thrust it into her dead heart.